


The Journal of Talon Tantiss

by Talon88



Series: The Tantiss Family [4]
Category: Star Wars Legends - All Media Types
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-31
Updated: 2019-01-31
Packaged: 2019-10-20 01:22:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 39
Words: 122,960
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17612771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Talon88/pseuds/Talon88
Summary: This story is based on my previous fanfics Second To None, The Journal of Mark Tantiss, & Sacrifices. Talon Tantiss is the son of Mark and Kira Tantiss. He is named after Mark's good friend Talon Karrde.Most of this fanfic has adventures of the young teenage Jedi as seen through the eyes of my teenage original character, Talon Tantiss.





	1. Chapter 1

**_Entry 1:_ **

Today I worked as an extra for a Jedi recruiting Holo for my Uncle Luke. The Grand Master was the star of the show, but some of his young students were asked to stand in the background. The younger Jedi apprentices were in the front and the older trainees stood the in rear. I was in back with the eighteen to twenty-year-old students—all of us on the brink of knighthood. My older brother Jaden was there along with my cousins Ben, Jak, Owen and Hanna Skywalker. Anakin Solo was present but Jaina and Jacen had already been knighted and were off on a mission. Next to Anakin was Tahiri Veila. Those two are virtually attached at the hip…or some other parts of their bodies. I rarely see them apart. We also had Corran Horn's children Valin and Jysella Horn. We had all grown up together so we are really good friends.

We did the shoot and were dismissed, but then I was stopped by the director of the holofilm. He asked me my name and who my parents were. He gave me a really eerie look and then asked if he could take a couple headshots of me with his imager for a recruiting flyer. I didn't see any harm in it, so I said okay and signed the waivers. Still, I kept getting a bad vibe from this guy. I just couldn't pinpoint the source of my unease.

He told me he planned to do a movie on the life and times of a Jedi and asked me if I kept a journal. I told him ' _no_ '. He suggested I do so. I assume he asked other Jedi also. I wouldn't know why he would just ask me.

I was never much of a writer, but I know my father kept a journal for years during the time of the New Republic and the skirmishes against the Empire. We have a treaty with the Imperial Remnant now, but during the early years of the New Republic there was some fierce fighting. This director should ask my father for his journal. I don't know what secrets are in it, but my father is pretty boring and totally whipped by my mother, so I doubt there is anything scandalous there.

I decided it might not be a bad idea to keep a journal. Maybe when I am old and retired I will have the story of my life published.

.

.

**_Entry 2._ **

Nothing happened exciting today. Got up, got into my uniform, went to lightsaber practice, meditation lessons, history instruction and then off to classes in the standard student curriculum seen in local school…basically, reading, writing, arithmetic, science, galactic history and foreign languages. Gods my life is boring.

.

.

**_Entry 3._ **

Stang! Oh kriff! The bantha poodoo hit the fan today. That director who took the head shots of me sold my image to some sleemo holonet show! The headline is: **Is this boy the lovechild of Luke Skywalker!?** Oh man, my mother, father, Uncle Luke and Aunt Mara are hot under the collar. They tried to get the images of me pulled but I signed a waiver. They are going through legal steps to try to quell the rumors, but that is going to take some time.

**I'm not the son of Luke Skywalker!**

I guess, if I ever do publish my journal, I should give a little back story as to who I am and who my real father is. My name is Talon Tantiss. I am the son of Mark Tantiss and Kira Starkos. My father was discovered deep within a fortress of Mount Tantiss on the planet Wayland. He is a clone. His DNA came from Luke Skywalker's severed hand, which he lost in a fight with his father Darth Vader on the Cloud City of Bespin.

My father initially looked just like Uncle Luke, but he kept growing and getting bigger and muscular until he was as big as a Wookiee. My Aunt Mara believes he was intended to be an Imperial Sentinel for the Dark Jedi Joruus C'Baoth. They think my father was scheduled to be chemically lobotomized and muted in order to become an extension of the dark Jedi's will. Unfortunately for C'baoth, my Aunt Mara did some impromptu heart surgery on him with her lightsaber. My father was found and basically raised by the Jedi. He is now a Jedi Master and has been Master to Luke's son Ben for over eight years now.

I have blond hair, blue eyes and don't look anything like my father because he doesn't want anybody to know he's a clone. He grew a beard and has dyed his hair bright red and his irises green for decades. He tells people his is my Aunt Mara's long lost brother. Who I do look like is Luke Skywalker. I am taller than Uncle Luke because I have my father's height, but I look very much like Luke did when he was my age.

Of course I actually look exactly like my Dad, but people don't know that. I guess I can understand why people might think I'm Uncle Luke's son.

This is such a mess!

.

.

**_Entry 4._ **

I was called into my uncle's office today. My parents and Aunt Mara were there also. I didn't think I did anything wrong, but my Uncle Luke informed me I was in violation of Jedi Academy code 48.16 which says, " _No Jedi Apprentice or Jedi Knight will grant interviews or allow the use of their image without first acquiring permission from the Temple's Public Affairs Officer"._

I was told that, if I had taken the time to talk to the Public Affairs Officer, I would have been informed that all imager requests for publication must be approved by the PAO and the Grand Master.

So basically, I'm in trouble…and I made it worse by trying to defend myself. I should have simply taken my punishment and learned from my mistake, but I didn't.

"I really don't know why this is such a big deal!" I said.

"Not a big deal," my mother screeched. Wow! That got me sweating. My mother will yell and occasionally curse, but I have never heard her screech. "They're saying I slept with your Uncle Luke! That's disgusting!"

I know my mother didn't mean that as an insult, but the look on my uncle's face was hilarious. He's probably thinking, _"Hey, I'm no Hutt."_ I think my Aunt Mara picked up on his bruised feelings from my Mom's remark and she glared at him. "You don't have to act disappointed, Farmboy!"

Uncle Luke's eyes went wide. "I wasn't disappointed, but it could have been phrased better."

My mother looked terribly embarrassed. "I'm sorry Luke, I didn't mean it that way. You're a handsome man, but I'm a married woman…besides, I like my men big." She gazed at my father lovingly and Dad gave her a wink and a huge grin. It's disgusting when they do that—giving each other mushy looks. And I _really_ hope my mother is referring to his height. Gross.

For some reason that comment didn't seem to make my uncle feel any better. In fact, he now looked more perturbed by the conversation than ever. Before he could say anything else my Aunt changed the subject. "Talon, you have to understand what we're going through. The media is accusing your mother and my husband of an adulterous affair."

I shrugged. "The media is always accusing you guys of horrible things. Why is this different?"

My family looked at each other puzzled. Finally my aunt asked me what I was talking about.

"Don't you read the holozine tabloids?"

"No, I have better things to do," Uncle Luke said. He pulled a datapad out of his desk and tossed it to me. "Show me what you're talking about."

I went to the holonet site for gossip and then wrote in Mara Jade and Luke Skywalker. Immediately a list of slanderous stories popped up. I picked one of the least offensive ones and passed it to my Aunt Mara. "Here's one about you."

She gave me a confused look but took the datapad and started reading. The blood rushed to her face and I could feel anger building up in the Force. Finally she let out an angry screech (that's two screeches in one day! I'm on a roll) and threw the datapad across the room. My Uncle Luke held out his hand and halted the datapad's movement before it shattered against the wall. He gave my aunt a bewildered look. "Mara, it can't be that bad."

"Read it!" She yelled at him.

The datapad floated over to him and he began to read and I could see the blood drain from his face. "Oh," was all he said.

"How can they say these things and get away with it?"

Uncle Luke took a deep breath. "We're a type of celebrity and not afforded the same protections as private citizens."

Aunt Mara pointed at the datapad. "Is that even physically possible for a human and a Quarren to do what they are suggesting? It's ridiculous!"

Luke looked at the datapad closer and turned it sideways. "I don't know whose body they holo-manipulated your head on, but it does look possible."

"Can I see," my father asked and he was promptly smacked on the head by both my mother and aunt. "Owww. Don't get mad at me. I'm not the one who made out with a Quarren."

"Neither did I!" My aunt yelled at him.

I shook my head. "Listen, the media has been making up lies about you and the rest of the Jedi for years. The only difference is my story got picked up by a holonet site and not a holozine. It just got a little more exposure than the other stories."

"Are there any stories about me?" My father asked and then got an elbow in the side by my mother.

"Only the one about you being a shaved Wookiee," I said with a laugh…and I wasn't joking.

My uncle Luke squeezed the bridge of his nose in frustration. "Talon. You will _not_ grant interviews, you will _not_ talk about this subject to any reporters or strangers and you will _not_ sign any more waivers allowing your image to be released to the press. Is that understood?"

I have never heard my uncle sound so mad. "Yes sir."

"Get out of here," he said. I got up and I hastily rushed to the door.

I really hope this story blows over soon.


	2. Chapter 2

Entry 5.

A group of my friends and I went to a dance club tonight. I needed to get away from the temple. My mother is still fuming and she is spending as much time as possible working at the restaurant and away from the Temple. This makes my father very grumpy because now he has to make his own dinner and after depending on my mother to cook his meals since he was a three-month-old-clone his culinary skill consists of heating up ration bars.

So I needed to escape the stress. I was with my brother Jaden, Ben Skywalker, Anakin Solo and Tahiri Veila (of course…where ever Anakin goes, so shall Tahiri). We snagged some seats in a corner table as far away from the band as possible so we could talk.

Right now Ben was laughing at my misfortune. "So I heard we're now half-brothers."

"Ha, ha, Ben. You better not joke like that in front of your parents. They are _not_ amused."

Ben snickered. "I heard you showed my mom that Quarren photomanip story."

I shuddered. "Don't remind me."

Ben was having trouble keeping a straight face. "When they came back home mom was doing holonet searches of her name in gossip holozines. All night long all I heard was, "What! I'm not the love child of Admiral Daala and Grand Moff Tarkin! Ack! Force Vampire! They say I suck the Force out of you, Luke!"

Ben chuckled. "I don't know what my father said back to Mom, but she threatened to take her lightsaber and cut off all protruding parts of his body for ' _that filthy comment_ '." Ben doubled over with laughter.

I shook my head in amazement. "I can't believe your mom never heard of those gossip-holozines."

Ben gave a dismissive wave of a hand. "They have a life you know, unlike you who obviously reads that trash."

I shrugged my shoulders. Ben's probably right. I need to find a hobby or hurry up and finished my Jedi Trials so I can go on missions. Of course Mom will expect me to go to college in case I one day decide the Jedi life was not for me.

I grabbed my soda and took a sip. We are all of legal drinking age (which is eighteen on Coruscant), but like most Jedi, the majority of us are non-drinkers. In fact, drinking is somewhat discouraged at the Jedi Academy; a drunken Jedi, is a dangerous Jedi. I think the policy originated from some huge fight between a group of Jedi and a swoop gang during a bachelor party. It happened before I was born, so I'm not sure whose party it was for or what Jedi were involved.

I look over to Anakin and Tahiri who were sitting so close together they were practically in each other's laps. They're faces were close together, noses touching, and they were whispering sweet nothings to each other. Ugh…how long is this romantic munk going to go on? They have been dating for years; they should just get married and get a place of their own.

I know Jaden wants them married and on their own. Right now he is sharing a room with Anakin in the temple. He said he will often come back from his pre-med studies at night and find a sock on the doorknob. That is Anakin's signal that he is 'entertaining' Tahiri in his room that night. So my exiled brother comes over to my room to crash. I still live with my parents, but he sleeps in my room because he doesn't want my mother finding out why he's there and telling Leia what her son is up to in the Temple dormitory. Not that I know what they are doing. I am sure it is something completely innocent like meditation. Ha…I can't write that with a straight face.

I wish Jaden wouldn't invite Anakin to these outings. It's not that I don't like Anakin. He is a great guy and technically my cousin, but he and Tahiri are _so_ obnoxious together.

They'll stare into each other's eyes and say things like, _"A day without your love is a day without life"_ or the all time worst " _You did more than kiss my lips, you kissed my soul_ ". Stang! Where do they come up with this sentimental sap? Do they do a holonet search for " _Love quotes to creep your friends out"_?

Anyway… getting back to our fun night out.

I am sitting there minding my own business when two beautiful young ladies come up to me and put their arms around my shoulders. "Aren't you Talon Tantiss? We saw you on the holonet."

I held up my hand signally them to stop talking. "Before you say anything I want to say the report is false. I'm definitely _NOT_ the son of Skywalker."

The girls gave a wry grin. "Of course you're not." One winked at me and whispered in my ear. "Your secret is safe with us." I jumped when the other girl leaned down and nibbled on my earlobe. "Do you want to come back with us to our apartment? We're roommates."

The other girl giggled. "And we share everything."

Now I have dated before, but I've never had two women come up and proposition me. I wasn't sure how to take that. It was thrilling and at the same time scary.

Ben gave them a disbelieving look. "You girls do know that _I'm_ actually the son of Luke Skywalker."

The women looked over to my freckled-face, redheaded cousin, gave him the once over and then turned back to me. "That's nice." They said indifferently.

Ben's face fell and I could feel a spike of irritation coming from him. He had the misfortune to be born a boy with his mother's hair color and complexion. Red hair is beautiful on women…men, not so much. Ben's younger sister Hanna is a gorgeous redhead that turns the head of just about every human male apprentice at the Temple…and Uncle Luke knows it. There is an anonymous, unofficial _directive_ that went around the temple warning men that the Grand Master's daughter was off limits! I am pretty sure Uncle Luke put out the word…but it could have been my Aunt Mara or one of Hanna's over protective brothers.

But, getting back to my story—I am being practically molested by two gorgeous women, meanwhile, my brother Jaden is now grinning furiously realizing how uncomfortable I was at the moment. He knows that even if I wanted to, I couldn't leave with these two ladies without my mother finding out. Mom's no prude, but I am fairly sure she would frown at me going off with two strange women to get 'entertained' in their apartment.

"I appreciate the offer ladies," I stammered. "But I have a Jedi mission to go to tonight. It is dangerous and top secret…but if you give me your comlink numbers maybe I can call you later. The girls smiled and took out a stylus and scribbled their numbers on a napkin. As they left I put the napkin in my pocket and gave my brother a poodoo eating grin. "I guess it helps looking like Dad instead of Mom."

My brother frowned. He had my mother's brown hair and eyes and tanned skin. He's not bad looking, but he's no Luke Skywalker.

"Ppfff," he made a dismissive sound, "I wish you went with them. They'd probably stun cuff you naked to bed and suddenly a dude wearing a Darth Vader costume will jump out of the closet and …"

"Please stop repeating that urban legend!" Anakin groaned. "Why does the costumed guy always have to be dressed as my grandfather in these stories?"

"Yeah," Ben said while making a face.

"Because a guy dressed as Yoda wouldn't be as menacing," Jaden laughed.

Before Anakin could reply Tahiri jump up and pulled him out of his seat. "They're playing our song," she said excitedly as he dragged Anakin to the dance floor.

I watched them dancing for a few minutes. Tahiri can dance, I'll give her that. Anakin, though, looks like he was taught to dance by See Threepio. "Jaden," I said to my brother.

"Yeah."

"If I ever get that whipped by a woman please shoot me with your blaster."

Jaden smirked. "Do I have to wait until you are whipped, or can I just do it now?"

I gave him a knowing look. "Oh, you're just jealous?"

"No, I have a feeling your resemblance to the Grand Master is going to end up getting you in trouble."

I looked at him confused. "Why is that?"

Jaden looked at Ben with a smirk. "You tell him."

Ben laughed. "Because Skywalkers always attract trouble."

Truer words have never been spoken.

.

.

**_Entry 6_ **

Shavit! Those girls from the club two nights ago are making my life miserable. First of all somebody took a holo of them hanging all over me that night. They then took the holo and posted it on their holonet social page saying that I actually went back with them and …let's just say most of the things they said I did I've never done with anybody in my life…let alone two women at once.

My holonet online sex life is astounding. I wish my real life could measure up. But I am under the watchful eye of my Master—which happens to be my Aunt Mara—and I also live with my parents. My love life is pretty much non-existent—which is why I can't wait until I start college next year. Then it will be _Jedi Gone Wild!_ Okay, maybe not wild, but at least there'll be some slack on my leash.

Where was I? Oh yeah, those girls posted some juicy gossip about my sexual prowess. That got around the campus of the college they went to and eventually the rumor was circulating in the Temple dorm and then I have my father grabbing me by the collar of my Jedi robes and pulling me into a conference room so he could give me a long, drawn out discussion on the proper way to treat women.

He was angry and his face was as red as his beard, so I didn't dare interrupt him until he finally took a breath and asked me if I understood. I then told him I did, but Jaden, Anakin, Tahiri and Ben could vouch for me that I didn't go anywhere with those women and they were probably upset that I didn't call them.

Dad glared at me for a moment searching my face and probably through the Force to see if I was lying. He then said, "Okay, but I better not find out you're bringing dishonor to the Jedi Order."

I told him I wouldn't. After he left I wondered if being known as a Jedi stud was actually bringing dishonor to the Jedi…but there was no way I was going to say that out loud.

I'm in trouble enough.

.

.

**_Entry 7_ **

Today I did lightsaber practice with my Master—Mara Jade Skywalker. I am fairly respectable with a lightsaber and I was looking forward to a good duel…but then I saw she had brought out the practice lightsabers. That's not good.

When we duel with real lightsabers I am fairly certain that even if I screw up my aunt wont chop my head off (although in the last few day…I'm not so sure). She always keeps tight control of her lightsaber just in case I do falter. Unfortunately, when she brings out the practice lightsabers I know I am going to feel the full fury of her lightsaber skills. I'm good, but not that good. I think she planned to put the hurt on me for signing those holo release forms. She'd never admit it though…revenge is not a Jedi thing.

Anyway, things start off well. She isn't holding anything back and I am able to defend myself for some time, but after the minutes droned on and on I started to feel the strain of combat. Eventually she broke through my guard and gave me a nasty welt across my arm. As I was reeling from that blow she spun and snapped the practice saber across my backside.

How embarrassing.

"That would be a fatal blow Talon. I can't send you out for your trials if you're not ready." She said without a trace of emotion, but I am sure she is either laughing or scowling at me deep inside.

"Yes, Master." I said as I moved back to the _En Garde_ position. She lunged at me. I parried and countered with my own strike which she blocked with ease. I opened myself up to the Force and focused intently on sparring. I managed to ward off a majority of her strikes, but I was so focused on my saber work that I was unprepared for a perfectly performed leg sweep which took my feet out from under me. I fell hard on my back and found the glowing blade of the practice saber a centimeter from my throat. "Yield," I said, embarrassed and angry at myself for screwing up.

She turned off the saber and then reached out to help me to my feet. "I'm a little tougher to spank than two co-eds, I see."

The blood drained from my face. It appears that the rumors have got around to the Skywalker household. I immediately thought of Ben. He must have told his parents about the gossip going around about me and those women. "Master…Aunt Mara…I never went anywhere with those girls and I definitely didn't dress up in a costume and spank them with a toy lightsaber!"

She stared at me coldly, her bright green eyes blazing. If I had a real lightsaber, I might have cut a hole in the floor and made my escape. Finally I could see the corners of her mouth curl up before she chuckled. "Since I have found myself the target of spurious rumors, I am willing to give you the benefit of the doubt, Talon." She looked me over and frowned. "The Grand Master was thinking of sending you with Ben on a mission. If you are going to be watching my son's back, you need to practice more. Ask Jaina for sparring help. She is the only young Jedi that gets close to beating me."

I nodded. "Yes Master."

With that my aunt turned and walked away. Ughh…the last person I want to spar with is Jaina. I can beat almost all the young Jedi in sparring, except Jaina. And I have yet to best my Aunt Mara. Maybe I just hold back because they are women. Ha! I would love to believe that, but I know it's not true. They _are_ good!

So now I have to go home with welts on my body and have my father laugh at my misfortune. He once told me how Aunt Mara used to do the same thing to him while sparring.

Just great.

.

.

**_Entry 8_ **

Things have been quieting down a bit. My story is becoming old news and now the top Holonet story involves some Gungan song rapper. It became a holonet sensation and now everybody is making their own version of the holo. It is ridiculously stupid. The main chorus is "Messa do it Gungan Style".

Hopefully after that dies down it will be replaced by a holo of cute pittens wearing hats.

Mom has been giving dad fits though. Most of the people in the Temple don't know Dad is a clone. He has kept that a secret for a long while. I know the Skywalkers, Solos, Horns, Solusars, and the Wild Karde crew all know, but few others do. She told dad that she has been getting dirty looks and people are whispering behind her back and believe she had an affair with my Uncle Luke. She told dad she is thinking about moving out of the Temple. That freaked out my dad out because he thought she was leaving him. I don't know why he would believe that. I think deep down he has some self-esteem problem about being a clone.

I know he had told me he keeps it secret because he wasn't sure how people would react. He didn't care about himself, but it would hurt him if people discriminated against his family because they thought him less than human. He said he knew the Old Republic had no problems building a slave clone army and using them as cannon fodder against the Separatist Droid Army. Dad did a lot of research on the clone wars. It is a sore subject for him. When we talk about Jedi ethics he always points out the hypocrisy. Part of the old Jedi code said "The Jedi will respect all life, in any form". He thought the clones were treated inhumanly. They had no choice in their fate. Deserters were hunted down and killed.

Anyway, Dad is sure there is still lingering bias against clones and wanted to keep things secret, but he didn't want to move his family out of the safety of the Temple, so we had a family meeting. My older brother Jaden, me and my parents all sat together and discussed our options. Mom never really cared that Dad was a clone. Jaden said he can care less if Dad revealed the truth. I wasn't sure what reaction I would get from my friends, but I didn't want my mother to be viewed as some home-wrecking woman. We decided the Jedi should know…at least the ones who lived in the temple that my mother would have contact with.

Uncle Luke got the Masters and Jedi together and revealed that Dad is his clone. After the laughter subsided, Uncle Luke explained the obvious differences between the two men. My mother was relieved and decided to continue living in the temple.

Everybody seemed very supportive. I hope this ends the controversy.


	3. Chapter 3

**_ENTRY 9_ **

Anakin finally proposed to Tahiri. It's about time. Jaden is thrilled. Anakin will be moving out of the Bachelor Apprentice Quarters and into the Family Housing Unit. And this makes me happy because Jaden won't be exiled from his quarters and end up crashing on the floor of my room anymore…unless he gets another roommate who's equally lucky with the ladies. That would be a bummer.

Of course, living with my parents is not much better, half the time I have to sleep with a pillow over my head to block out the strange noises coming from their sleeping chambers. I have no idea what creepy things my parents are up to...and I don't want to know. Once I caught my dad at two in the morning grabbing whipped cream out of the cooling unit. That alone wouldn't be so weird, but he was wearing boxer shorts, a cape and an Imperial Sentinel helmet at the time. Luckily, I ran back to my room before he realized I saw him. I really didn't want to hear what type of lame explanation he was going to give me for wearing that costume.

Maybe I should ask Jaden if I could become his roommate. I really doubt he will remain alone in a double room for long. After all, the Academy is growing everyday. Jaden is not a speciesist but I really don't think he would enjoy living with a shedding Wookiee, an odorous Tof, or an arrogant Arkanian. He'd be better off with me.

But that's all going to have to wait until after Anakin and Tahiri's wedding. I was told a wild bachelor party was being planned for Anakin. That should be fun. Maybe there will be lady dancers…hopefully of the human variety. I am not a speciesist either, but that female Rodian dancer that showed up at Rayf Ysanna's bachelor's party just didn't do anything for me…although the Askajian that danced afterwards was interesting...very interesting.

I shouldn't be thinking about such things. I have enough girl troubles as it is.

.

.

**_Entry 10_ **

Dad's in trouble with Mom…again. He came home a few days ago driving a speeder bike. He didn't tell Mom he was going to buy one…probably because he knew she hates speeder bikes. She thinks they're way too dangerous. They argued about it for a while and finally he admits he got it because his friend Corran Horn made fun of his 'family' speeder.

In my father's defense, I don't blame him for not wanting to drive the family vehicle anymore. It's a modified seven-seat speeder whose back seats can be folded down into the chassis to make room for freight. He bought it with my mother in mind because she could use it for her catering jobs. Dad drove that around until recently when Mom decided to have the sides of the speeder painted with the restaurant logo. That was bad enough but there was a wreath of Ithorian roses framing the design.

Come on, Mom! Dad's a Jedi warrior; he shouldn't have to ride around in a family speeder with flowers painted on the side.

Anyway, Corran Horn, sarcastically commented to Dad that he had such a _pretty_ speeder. That got my dad hot under the collar so he decided to get a speeder bike…because everybody knows having a landspeeding crotch-rocket is the best way to prove you're a real man. Unfortunately he got one a little too small for his body weight. My father is 2.10 meters in height and probably 125 kilograms. When he drove down the street the back end of the bike sat a little too close to the ground and would bottom out when he went over rough terrain. Dad would need a turbo charged swoop to hold his weight.

I guess it could be worse. Two years ago Corran made fun of Dad's 'family' shuttle (I have no idea why those two like to harass each other. Mom says it's because they like each other so much). Dad got upset and bought an old Headhunter and then retrofitted the wings and engines onto the shuttle fuselage. He now says it is his modified Headhunter. It is more like a modified 'Mommy shuttle'. My Aunt Mara saw it and laughed so hard I thought she would break a rib. Uncle Han thought it was cool, though.

Getting back to my story…Mom finally told my dad he could keep the bike if he increased his life insurance policy because she knows he's going to get himself killed.

Dad left in a huff and then came back four hours later without the speeder bike but instead a sleek, bright red, high performance, two-seater airspeeder…the kind of vehicle a man going through a mid-life crisis would buy. Mom just rolled her eyes and said that was better. Hopefully that solved the problem. Mom gets the flower covered cargo speeder and dad gets the Manly-Mobile (I hope he'll let me drive it sometime).

.

.

**_Entry 11_ **

Stang! Tonight was fun! It was Anakin's bachelor party. We went to a cantina that Anakin's father highly suggested. It was a place called the _Red Rancor_ …which is coincidently what my father calls his ship. I wonder if there is a connection there? Anyway, Han Solo said going to the _Red Rancor_ for bachelor parties was an old Corellian tradition and since he was paying for the party he had a say in the venue.

What I didn't know was that all our fathers were going to the party also. Why in the worlds would Anakin invite his dad, Luke, Corran and my father? It sort of puts a crimp on our style. There is no way they would tolerate us getting drunk and starting a bar fight…they are all too prim and proper for that kind of behavior. Not that I wanted to get drunk and fight, but if I did…the option is no longer there.

Despite the presense of our aging fathers, we did manage to have fun. There was me, Jaden, Anakin, Jacen, Valin and Ben all sitting around a large table at the center of the tavern. The food was good and there was plenty of drinks courtesy of the father of the groom, but no strippers. Anakin said he was scared of Tahiri showing up with lightsaber blazing if she got a hint that scantily clad women would be there.

"Gods, you are so whipped!" I said to Anakin.

He just frowned at me. "She didn't say I couldn't have strippers. I just didn't want to do anything that might upset her."

"Ha! In other words, whipped!" Jaden yelled out then went back to drinking his second mug of ale.

"At least I have a woman," Anakin shot back to Jaden.

That got my big brother riled up. "Who said I don't have a woman?"

"If you do it must be the invisible woman." Anakin joked.

"Or she could be a student at the university I am attending," Jaden replied. "Not all of us date female Jedi."

"Although some may want to," I said with a snarky tone. I know Jaden has had a crush on a couple Jedi ladies at the Temple. Talk about a wuss! He is too scared to approach them.

"Oh no," Jacen moaned as he looked up to the tavern's small stage by the dance floor. "Please don't tell me they're going to sing."

We looked up to see Han Solo and Corran Horn walk up to the microphone on stage. Both were holding large mugs of ale in their hands. The establishment had a Singing-Assist machine. A patron could pick a song and the background music would play as the lyrics moved across a screen. The patron would then sing the lyrics…usually very badly…as their friends cringed in the audience.

We heard the background music of a traditional Corellian drinking dirge sound out from the speakers. I notice Jacen, Anakin and Valin all slid down in their seats a bit as they tried to hide their faces.

"Somebody please kill me," Jacen moaned as his father started belting out a horribly off tune rendition of the song.

**_In a Corellian pub far, far away,_ **

**_I sat on a barstool, just drinking away,_ **

**_I couldn't hold it down, I guess I had too much_ **

**_I felt a tremor in the force and then I lost my lunch_ **

"No, kill me first," Valin moaned as Corran chimed in with the chorus.

**_So let's all drink up and prepare to fight_ **

**_In defense of Corellia we ride tonight!_ **

Ben laughed. "Hey, Corellian drinking songs come with the territory. At least you don't have to hear the _'When I was a boy I had to get up before sunrise to fix moisture evaporators.'_ lecture."

"No," Anakin shot back. "We have to hear, ' _When I was your age, I had two death sentences on my head and had to support myself by swoop racing_.'"

"Oh Gods!" Ben put his head down on the table in an exaggerated look of embarrassment. "My dad's going up on stage with them. He isn't even Corellian!"

Luke was now on the stage and the three men were trying to wave my father up to sing also, but Dad refused with a shake of his head. My father doesn't drink so his inhabitations were obviously firmly in place. Still, the fear that he would go up almost had me fleeing the establishment. Luckily Ben's younger brothers showed up.

Jak and Owen were identical twins born to Luke and Mara a couple years after Ben was born. Both had green eyes and dark blond hair that would get reddish highlights when they spent too much time in the sun. They were tanned, having not inherit the pale skin and freckled complexion of their older brother Ben. They were okay guys, but they had this creepy identical twin vibe going on all the time. They would finish each other's sentences and often would dress alike.

"Guys," one of the twins said as he ran up to the table. At that point I wasn't sure if I was dealing with Jak or Owen. "We found where the…"

"Bachelorette party is being held," the other twin said as he came up behind his brother.

Anakin perked up. "Really? Where?"

"Two blocks down. At a tavern called _The Palace_. It's ladies' night." The twin, who I am fairly certain is Jak, smirked. "There are tons of hot looking ladies down there."

"Do you want to go check it out?" Owen asked.

I look up to the stage and see my father has given in to peer-pressure and was joining Luke, Han and Corran up on the stage. "Yes!" I say enthusiastically. "Let's get out of here!"

We moved out to the crisp night air and quickly walk down to _The Palace_. We paid the cover charge to a guy that gave us a weird look. I wasn't sure what that was about until we got inside and realized it was not just ladies night, but Male Revue Night.

So now I am thinking, _'Why do the ladies get male strippers when we couldn't have female dancers?'_

"Stang!" Jaden exclaimed. "Valin…is that your sister Jysella in a microdress and putting credits into that guy's…ummm…front pouch?"

Valin looked over to where Jaden pointed and turned white. "Oh Gods!"

"She looks beautiful." The words came out of Jaden in almost a whisper, but Valin must have heard him because he gave my brother a light punch on the arm.

"Don't be looking at my sister like that!"

"Valin," Ben chuckled. "Women don't wear dresses like that unless they _want_ to be looked at."

Jacen let out a gasp. "Oh Force…is that my sister next to Jysella?"

Owen started cracking up. "Yes, and it's too bad she's my cousin. She looks…" He didn't get to finish the sentence. Jacen shot him such a glare that both twins slunk back a step.

"Wow, that dude is really rubbing up against Jaina." Ben remarked hoarsely as he stared transfixed at the scene before him.

"Tahiri!" Anakin mumbled in shock as he saw his fiancé laugh and throw credits up on the stage to a muscular man with tight, tight shorts that outlined his manly assets in a way that made the women scream but made me queasy.

Then I saw something I never want to see again. There in a corner booth cheering the young Jedi on were…our mothers!

"Oh kriff! Mom's here!" I said to Jaden as I pointed to a dark corner of the club.

"And my mother!" Anakin said looking faint.

"Isn't that Mirax Horn with them also?"

"And that redhead that is facing away from us…" Owen started.

"Is our mom!" the other twin finished.

Ben looked like he was going to be ill. "I think I've seen enough."

We all agreed and nearly ran out of the tavern. We didn't want anybody seeing us there.

So we went back to the _Red_ _Rancor_. By that time Han and Chewie were fighting with a swoop gang. At least the night wasn't a total bust.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song in this story was based on the real life Jedi Drinking song by the Brobdingnagian Bards.


	4. Chapter 4

**_Entry 12_ **

I went to Anakin Solo and Tahiri Veila's wedding today. Despite the fact that Anakin and Tahiri have been inseparable for years and Anakin wanted to be married more than anything—he had what I would call a tiny _'episode'_ while at the altar. He was standing next to Tahiri, holding her hands and suddenly his eyes glazed over and he started sweating. Then he started to sway. My Uncle Luke was officiating and he hesitated and whispered something to Anakin. There was a pause in the ceremony as Jaina came up with a glass of water for her brother. I am pretty sure he was about to pass out. Maybe he drank a little too much after we took out those swoop gang members at the _Red Rancor_.

He drank the water and gave the audience a lopsided grin as he put his hand up in an _'I'm alright'_ gesture. Tahiri appeared more amused than upset. The rest of the ceremony went well. They exchanged rings, they kissed, my mom cried, Aunt Leia cried, Aunt Mara didn't cry, but I am pretty sure her eyes were misting up.

After the ceremony we went to the reception, which was at my parent's restaurant, the _Manarai._ My parents closed the restaurant to the public just for this special occasion. There was plenty of food, an open bar and a live band. Jaden, Ben and I walked toward the refreshment table just as Karrde's two daughters grabbed flutes of sparkling wine off the beverage counter and walked away like they belonged there. But they didn't belong there…we all knew they were way to young to drink.

"Wait right there," I said as I took the alcoholic drink out of Zylie's hand. Ben assisted me by confiscating the other drink from Zylie's sister Valla.

"Give that back to me, Ben Skywalker!" Valla said.

"You're not of drinking age," Ben pointed out.

She crossed her arms across her chest as she glared at my redheaded cousin. "I'm seventeen. Next year I'll be legal."

"Yeah," piped in Zylie. "And I am a very mature twelve year old."

That comment made me laugh in her face. She turned bright red and glared at me.

Ben drank Valla's confiscated drink as he smiled. "That may be so, but until you are both eighteen you have to get your drinks from the kids' table."

"You guys are jerks," Valla said as she scowled at Ben.

"Yeah, I can't believe you're named after my father," Zylie added as she looked in my direction. The girls both stalked off, but not before Zylie made an obscene gesture to me.

I turned to Jaden and Ben. "Did you see that?" I shook my head. "Gods, I feel sorry for anybody who dates those girls."

Ben laughed. "I know."

In reality I wouldn't mind dating Valla. She is only a year younger than me and she has a quirky personality that I like. Also, it doesn't hurt that she is very easy on the eyes. She has her mother's good looks and trim body, but she has the dark eyes and hair of her father. Zylie looks like a miniature version of Valla, but she is a little more hotheaded than her sister…and sarcastic. Despite her quarrelsome attitude, I am sure in five or six years she will be turning heads.

Jaden returned from the beverage table with a mixed drink. "Ben, just a heads up," he said. "Your baby sister Hanna is drifting over to the alcohol."

I laughed as Ben ran his fifteen-year-old sister away from the adult beverages, while threatening to tell their mom."

Valin Horn wandered up to where we were standing. He's carrying a mug of ale and sporting a smirk on his face. "You guys want to see something pathetic?"

We're guys…of course we want to see something pathetic. He signals for us to follow him and we end up lurking behind some curtains covering the large balcony windows. The doors to the balcony are open so we can see outside.

There sitting on an ornate marble bench is Tenel Ka and Jacen. They are whispering to each other and laughing. Valin turns to us, "Do you think he'll try to kiss her this time?"

Ben shook his head. "No, but I wish he would. I am pretty sure that much sexual tension can be fatal."

Jaden and I laughed, but then dove behind the curtains when Jacen looked up.

"Okay, I'll put down twenty credits that he'll get the kiss," I told them. "I mean the guy is in his early twenties. He can't possibly be that shy." I looked at my brother. "Didn't he date anybody at the Academy before he was knighted?"

"Lusa?" Valin offered referring to the female Chironian that attended the academy with us.

I have to cover my mouth with my hand to hide my laughter. "No Lusa had a thing for Raynar."

Ben gave me a curious grin. "How would that work?"

Jaden made a face. "Please Ben, don't put disturbing xenosexual images into my mind…but to answer your question…I assume it would involve a step ladder."

Valin laughed and snorted his ale up through his nose.

"I'm just kidding, guys," my brother said. He turned to me and grinned. "I'll take that bet. I think Jacen will wuss out."

So we watch and I am positive I am going to win. The proximity of the two Jedi were getting closer and closer. Jacen turns to talk to her and their faces are centimeters apart from each other. Then he leans in—and I just know I won twenty credits—and then he turns away with a nervous cough.

I swear Tenel Ka looked mad. I don't know why she's waiting for Jacen to make the first move. She is a descendent of a Dathomir witch. She should just dress up in leather, grab Jacen, claim him as her mate, toss him on the bed and then ravish him. Ha! I'm sure he wouldn't mind.

My brother is holding out his hand. "Pay up." I glowered at him as I reached into my pocket and pulled out a twenty-credit chip.

Well, that was a bust.

Fortunately, after dinner I did find a few nice, non-related, ladies to dance with me.

Now that Anakin is married, he will be moving out of the bachelor quarters… and I can move in with my brother and out of my parents' quarters. Yeah! No longer do I have to live under their watchful eye.

**_Party!_ **

.

.

**_Entry 13_ **

Finally! I moved out of my parents' apartment and into the Bachelor Quarters! I am Jaden's roommate now. Unfortunately, it is not the big party bachelor apartment that I expected. Jaden studies a lot and gets mad when I play the HoloNet too loud or my HoloGames…or just about anything that makes a noise. He takes his studies very seriously. But despite our differences, we overall got along…until a female came into our lives.

And by female I mean a four-month-old pitten my brother brought home one day. It is a fuzzy brown-and-gray striped four-legged feline-like creature that is small enough to be held in my two hands. Jaden explained he wanted to get one for the last two years but Anakin was allergic to pittens. I told him that was fine as long as he took care of it and it left me alone.

I really don't care for pittens and I was determined to avoid the creature, but the more I tried to evade the animal the more it followed me around. It would rub against my legs or climb into my lap when I was watching the HoloNet. One day I was sitting on the couch typing on my datapad when the pitten walked across the keypad. That pitten's paws must have hit the exact sequence of datapad keys needed to cause the viewscreen to suddenly turn sideways. Jaden thought that was _'cute'_. I thought it was annoying. It took me an hour to figure out how to fix the screen.

A week later I was sleeping peacefully when suddenly something landed on my chest. I think I am being attacked, so I roll out of bed and call my lightsaber to my hand, igniting it. From the greenish glow of the saber I could see that damn pitten on my bed, her eyes wide and so frightened her fur was standing on end so she looked like a hairy puffball (I was told this is a defense mechanism to make it look bigger to predators). I deactivate my saber and use the Force to turn on the lights.

"Jaden! Get your pitten!"

Jaden finally dragged his butt out of his bed and came in to recovered his pet. "There's my little fuzzy pitten! Come here Fuzzy." He said this in a ridiculous sing-song voice, which is bad enough, but then he picked up the animal and kissed it on the nose. Gross.

Then one day I am lying on the couch taking a nap when I feel sharp little claws massaging my head and something licking my hair. I reach back and pick up the young pitten by the nape of her neck.

"Jaden," I said to my brother who was watching the HoloNet. "Why is Fuzzy doing pitten push-ups on my head and licking my hair?"

He looked up and laughed. "I think she was taken away from her mother too early and she is trying to find a teat."

"Ah, gross." I ran my hand through my hair wet with pitten spit. "You have to get rid of this thing."

"She's a baby, she will grow up to be a normal anti-social pitten," Jaden said with a laugh.

I just glared at him as I left to take a shower…that is one place the pitten won't follow.

.

.

**_Entry 14_ **

This is a day for the record books. I didn't know it was possible to irritate so many people in one day.

It was the weekend and Jaden and I return to our apartment after lunch. We walk in and there is Jaden's pet pitten, Fuzzy, lying motionless on the floor and looking very much dead.

"Fuzzy!" Jaden yells out. He runs over and scoops up the small animal. Despite the fact that I don't like pittens…that one was growing on me, so I was also upset.

"Is she dead?" I asked my brother.

He is checking her out and we notice she was breathing. "No, she's unconscious, but I don't know why." Suddenly we saw movement on the floor. Jaden made a hilarious and very unmanly yelping noise before he jumped on the couch. He's stood on the cushions and pointed to the floor. "Watch it! I think that is Jacen's Crystal Snake."

I don't want to get bit so I jump on the couch is probably stupid because I am positive that snakes can climb up onto a couch.

"Where is it?" That snake is translucent looking and can blend in with its environment. Its venom can also cause a person to go unconscious for an hour or two. We needed to catch it before we were bitten. I look around the room and see an empty storage box that I kept from my move to the apartment. Fuzzy liked hiding in the box and then jumping out to attack me when I walked by. I reach out with the Force and grab the box and brought it to my hands.

"Do you see it?" I asked Jaden.

"There!" he said while pointing to the floor right under us. I jump down and drop the box over the reptile.

"That is the second time that snake has escaped." I told Jaden.

He laughed. "Remember when it bit Dad? He was passed out for an hour."

"Yeah, but dad did think it was funny." I pulled out my comlink and contact Jacen. "Jacen this is Talon. Your stupid Crystal Snake is in my apartment. If you're not here in ten minutes I am going to take out my lightsaber and use it for target practice."

That's a lie. I wouldn't have killed it, but I thought that would get him moving. And I guess it did because he was over in five minutes holding a small reptile carrier.

"You better have not hurt him." Jacen said to me irately…like it's my fault his snake is loose. I'm the one who should be mad.

"It's alright," I said as my brother climbed off the couch.

Jacen takes the carrier and opens it up. He then gently lifts the box and got ready to nab the creature with the Force…but it's not there. Jacen lifts the box up all the way and the snake is gone. So, we are all looking for the runaway snake when something catches my eye. Jacen is still holding the box and the snake is crawling out from it. The box had flap tops that were folded into the box. That snake must have been hiding behind the flap…because just then it slithered out and bit Jacen on the hand. He looked down at his hand, wide-eyed and slack jawed…right before he collapsed on the floor and the snake slithered off across our floor.

Jaden jumps on the couch again while clutching his pitten and I use the Force to put the box over the snake again. So now I have an upset brother clutching an unconscious pitten and a unconscious overconfident cousin lying on the floor. What to do?

I move over to my desk and grab a permanent marker.

"What are you doing?" Jaden asked me.

"I thought we would draw some Zabrak phallic symbols on his face for what his snake did to Fuzzy."

My brother gives me an incredulous look. "What are you, twelve?"

I just laugh. "I wasn't really going to do that…although that would be funny. I was just going to see how he would look with a mustache."

"No!" my brother said firmly.

"How about putting his hand in a bowl of warm water."

"Not unless you like cleaning up urine," Jaden replied.

I look at Jaden. "Okay, what _do_ you want me to do?"

"Take him back to his room and I am going to bring Fuzzy to Cilghal. Maybe she can check her out."

My brother is no fun. "Fine." I pick up Jacen and toss him over my shoulder. I gestured to the box. "You better put something on top of that so it doesn't get out again."

I then leave the apartment carrying my cousin. On the way to his room I come across Jysella Horn.

"What happened to Jacen?"

"Crystal Snake," I responded.

"Again," she laughed. "Where are you bringing him?"

"To his room."

"Wait, wait." She says. "I want Tenel Ka to see this." She walked down the hall until she was standing in front of her room. "Just put him in here while I find her."

I shrug my shoulders. "Fine."

So I bring Jacen into the room and get him ready to see the girls.

_A little later…._

I went back to my apartment and managed to get that snake into the cage Jacen had provided and I delivered the animal to his quarters. About a half hour later Jaden comes running into the room with his still unconscious pitten in hand, all red in the face and sweating.

"What's wrong?"

"I don't know. I was coming back and Jacen started chasing me saying he was going to kill me. He's gone all darkside!"

I was going to laugh but a loud bang sounded at our door like somebody was trying to break it down.

"Open up or I will slice up the door with my lightsaber!" Jacen called out.

I looked at my brother. "I guess we should open it."

My brother brought his pitten to his room as I open the door for my irate cousin. He muscled his way in and glares at me. "Where's Jaden?"

I point to the back room. Jaden comes out looking nervous. "What is it Jacen?"

"What is it? I know your pitten got hurt but what you did in retaliation was way over the top!"

My brother is all confused and flustered. "After you got bit, I brought my pitten to Cilghal." He pointed to me. "Talon was supposed to bring you to your room…didn't he?"

Jacen turned to me and I swear his eyes turned all Sithy yellow…but that might have just been the overhead lights playing tricks on me. "You did that to me?"

"Did what?" Jaden asked.

Jacen points an accusing finger in my direction. "He stripped me down to my boxers and left me on Jysella's couch and wrote this on my chest." He then lifted up his shirt to expose an inscription made in permanent marker; _"Jacen loves Tenel Ka"_ I even put down a little heart and smiley face. Okay maybe that was something a twelve-year-old would do. "Jysella brought Tenel Ka to the room and they both saw me like this!"

Jaden was standing there and biting his lower lip. He is trying so hard not to laugh that his face was turning red. Finally, he burst out laughing. "I'm sorry Jacen…it's just…" He takes a couple deep breaths and collects himself. "That was wrong of Talon."

He turned to me and glared. "Are we going to settle this like men?"

I laughed. "What? Are you talking about fighting?"

"Hand to hand, in the gym."

"Fine," I said as I motioned to the door. "After you."

Jacen stepped out to the hall and I shut the door behind him and lock it. I can't believe he fell for that old trick! He starts pounding on the door again, so I call Corran Horn who is Jacen's master for help. After a few minutes I hear the two Jedi outside talking. I can feel Jacen's anger through the Force and I know I went a tiny bit too far.

Corran tells me to open up, so I do. He drags me to the gym where I get my butt thoroughly handed to me by Jacen. My cousin is really, really good at hand-to-hand combat. He told me there were twenty very painful submission holds that he knew, and he then proceeded to demonstrate half of them on my body. I became intimately acquainted with the arm-triangle choke, an armbar, a kneebar, a hammerlock, a calf slicer, and the infamous leg triangle choke. That last one was particularly humiliating.

I can't use the Force to help me because of the ysalamiri in the gym, so I am all huffing and puffing and sweating like a Gamorrian. Being Force-blind is not fun. I don't know how my father tolerates it.

Jacen is looking all smug and vindicated. Okay, he deserves some payback…although revenge is not supposed to be a Jedi thing.

So, I go home. When Jaden sees me, he starts pulling out bacta patches and practices his pre-med stuff on me. I looked in the mirror and cringed. Jacen really messed up my handsome face and what's really irritating is Jacen looked fine when he left the mat. I really need to get Corran to teach me some of those techniques.

About ten minutes later Jaden is done patching me up. "You deserved it!" he proclaimed. "That was an immature and cruel thing to do to him. You know he likes Tenel Ka. Now you humiliated him in front of her."

I snort. "Hey, Jacen doesn't look bad with his shirt off. I thought I would just give Tenel Ka a little preview. Maybe it will speed up things."

"Still it's wrong." Jaden looks over to the floor and noticed the box was no longer there. He turned to me. "Where's his snake?"

"I put it in his apartment."

Jaden looks at me suspiciously. "Where in his apartment?"

I turn away laughing.

Jaden knew I was up to something, so pulls out his comlink. "Jacen! Jacen! Pick up!" He looks up to me again. "Where did you put it?!"

"In the 'fresher." I finally say with a chuckle.

_And..._ that's how I got two weeks of room confinement from my Uncle Luke and a second demonstration from Jacen of the other most painful submission holds I didn't experience the first time around.

Neither were pleased that Jacen was found unconscious in the bathroom with his pants around his ankles.

The good news is...Fuzzy made a full recovery.


	5. Chapter 5

**_ENTRY 15_ **

I am finally on my first Jedi Mission to a combat area. I have done a lot of training in the field and at the Temple, but this is the first time I am actually in a situation where people would really want to kill me.

Since I am now no longer a minor I was able to tag along with Ben during his trials. He should be knighted after this mission.

I'm really excited to go on this expedition with Ben and my father. Dad is Ben's Master and they have been going on missions together since Ben was fourteen. I was always a little jealous because I was not allowed to participate in any hostilities until I turned eighteen. That was my mother's rule, not the Jedi Order's.

My mom said she did not bring two children into the world so they could become child soldiers. She sees Jedi younglings killing others as an atrocity. I know my mother loves my Uncle Luke and Aunt Mara, but she is appalled that Ben was allowed to accompany my dad into firefights and other nasty situations at such a young age.

I don't know what my father thought about the subject because he rarely goes counter to my mother. He may be a Jedi Master in the Temple, but Mom's the master of our home. And I don't say that to disrespect my father. One has to understand the situation…he's gone on Jedi or GA Military missions…a lot. He said it would cause extreme stress in the family if he left Mom to take care of the home and family for months at a time alone and then he wandered back to their quarters and expected to take charge and do things his way…only to leave a few weeks later for another two month deployment…after screwing up her entire system. He said Mom is the commander of the home front and that means if she doesn't want me to go into combat until I am an adult…then so be it.

Anyway, my first mission was to the planet Taris where the GA military had tracked a group of terrorists to an outpost in the middle of a large city. The terrorist had barricaded themselves into a building and had taken hostages. Artillery couldn't be used within the city… and even if they could the hostages would perish.

We were transported through the city by a Military Police armored personnel speeder. It had a driver and a gunner manning twin turboblasters attached to the roof of the vehicle.

We pulled up to an abandoned building that was used as a field headquarters. A stocky muscular soldier ran up to the speeder. "Are these my Jedi?"

The driver sneered. "No, they are a three homeless guys I dressed up in Jedi robes."

The other soldier laughed. "I see sitting all day in the safety zone has made you a comedian." He opened the speeder's blaster proof doors and motioned for us to get out. My Dad squeezed his hulking body out of the vehicle. He stood up to his full height, towering the soldier. The man smirked as he stuck out his hand to my father. "Corporal Rycus, EOD. We met before on Null."

EOD means explosive ordnance disposal…he is the guy that takes apart bombs.

My dad shook his hand. "I remember. It's good to see you again." He looked at the man's hand and grinned. "And you still have all your fingers."

Corporal Rycus laughed. "That's the mark of a good EOD Tech." He released his grip and then went back to the driver. "I'll let you get back to your cushy job. Remember you can't spell wimp without MP."

The driver scowled at Corporal Rycus. "Well, you can't spell….idiot without EOD."

' _Huh?'_

Rycus laughed and punched the driver on the shoulder. "See you later Rik." He turned to us. "He's my brother-in-law. I have to give him a hard time."

"What's the situation?" my father asked.

The Corporal gave us a sitrep as he walked up to the forward operating center. "There are snipers on the upper floors. They're not amateurs. They're using a slugthrower and obviously shooting through tiny loopholes because we haven't been able to pinpoint their location. It is much easier to suppress the muzzle flash from a slugthrower than a blaster any day." Rycus hesitated for a moment. "It's not a normal slugthrower…it's a Blaster Buster. So you can see our problem."

My father turned to me and Ben and explained a Blaster Buster was a slugthrower that could fire repulsor and heat sensor equipped slugs that will home in on a recently fired blaster. Because the slugs had repulsors it could make turns around corners to seek out the blaster. It usually wasn't fatal to the soldier holding the weapon, but when it blew up the blaster it usually took off the hand of the man holding the weapon. Injured soldiers were often more valuable than a kill. The terrorists knew the GA military would temporarily leave a dead man during a retreat (although it is greatly frowned upon), but they never left an injured man behind. It usually took two soldiers to evac one injured…and therefore pulling three military men temporarily out of action.

My father explained that the heat sensor slugs had to be adjusted to specific heat gradients specific for various models of blasters…and they were very ineffective against lightsabers.

We walked up some stairs to the second floor of an old warehouse where we met up with a small group of military men examining blueprints…probably for the building where the hostages are being held.

"They're here LT."

A young lieutenant who didn't look much older than Ben turned to greet us. "Thanks for coming. I'm Lieutenant Ludoga." He extended his hand and my father shook it. "Jedi Master Tantiss," my father said and then motioned toward me and Ben. "And with me are Jedi Apprentices Ben Skywalker and my son Talon Tantiss."

The Lieutenant looked impressed. "Skywalker? I heard Luke Skywalker's son might be coming. It is such an honor to meet you." He then walked up and shook my hand. Ha! Ben was not amused.

You really can't blame the guy. Dad and Ben have bright red hair and I look just like Luke Skywalker.

"I'm Talon Tantiss," I said then pointed to Ben. "This is Ben Skywalker."

The Lieutenant gave me a confused look but then pulled himself together and offered his hand to Ben. "My apologies." He pumped Ben's hand enthusiastically. "It is an honor to meet both of you."

My father chuckled and then got to business. "How can we help?"

The Lieutenant gave him a grim look. "I was hoping to get you and your apprentices do a R.E.B.J."

Dad must have seen my confusion. "That is Rapid Entry by Jedi. We go in lightsabers swinging and clear a path."

From the corner of the room I heard Corporal Rycus snicker and whisper to another enlisted man. "I thought that meant Really Egotistical Braggart Jedi."

The Lieutenant scowled and turned to discipline the man, but was interrupted by my father. "That's only when I have Jedi Apprentice Raynar Thul with me."

Ben and my Dad started laughing and I realized I must have missed some private joke, but I could imagine what they meant. Raynar Thul is the son of Alderaanian nobels and he made sure everybody knew it. He's a spoiled and arrogant Apprentice with a flair for brightly colored robes. Obviously he made an impression on the military men in the field…a bad impression.

Dad turned serious and looked to the men in the room. "We'll make a plan of attack and then move out."

I will write more when I get back from the mission. This should be exciting.

**.**

**.**

**_Entry 16_ **

I finished my first combat mission. It _was_ extremely exciting, but right about now I wish I could do a memory rub on myself in order to forget everything that happened.

It started out okay. Dad and Ben decided on a route of entry and our plan was fairly simple…run up, deflect blasterbolts or slugs, pull the doors open and then enter making as much noise as possible. As we made this huge distraction the Galactic Alliance's Special Covert Action Team (or GASCAT) would move in and secure the hostages. I was told the men were already in position. They were wearing stealth bodysuits to hide their heat signature and it could render the wearer visually undetectable for a short period of time. I never really understood the technology behind it, but when the suit is activated it supposedly blends light sound and electromagnetic waves around the wearer making them invisible (I wouldn't mind getting one of those. I could really put a scare into my brother).

Anyway, although we are actually going to attack the enemy, we are also acting as a diversion. We should have worn tunics with big neon targets painted on the front because our job was to be shot at while the real heroes-currently hiding in underground steam tunnels or ventilation shafts-went in for the rescue.

Using infrared sensors the GA troopers had tried to figure out where the hostages were held. Unfortunately, the terrorists were using a number of countermeasures such as sensor scramblers and the use of heat sticks to confuse the sensing equipment. The bottom line was nobody knew where the hostages were located. Once we entered we had to either kill the terrorists or at least keep them busy long enough for the small search and rescue team to sneak in, locate and evacuate the prisoners.

Finally the time came to go. My father put his hand on my shoulder and gave me a tight smile. "You ready, son?"

"Yeah." I sounded confident, but I have to admit I was nervous. I look over to Ben and he gave me a classic Skywalker smile. He's not nervous. All I can sense from him is a eerie calmness in the Force. It is an inner tranquility that the Grand Master often tried to teach me but I have so far failed to emulate.

We moved out of the field headquarters and because we wanted to be noticed we walked toward the building side-by-side with lightsabers blazing. Immediately we started taking fire by the slug thrower. We can't see the slugs rushing toward us, but we can sense them in the Force and I can hear stray slugs wiz by me overhead. We cut down the projectiles, but because these were exploding slugs we had to use the Force to shield ourselves from shrapnel. Despite the heavy deluge of gunfire in our direction we were able to make it to the front doors.

We all had comlinks screwed into our ears and we can hear updates on the GASCAT team. They were in and clearing the back of the building and moving to the higher floors to take out the snipers and look for the hostages. Our job was to clear the front part of the building. Everything was going as planned and I started to feel very proud of myself…even a bit cocky. I was able to hold my own against the enemy and help out my fellow Jedi. It felt good.

"Talon," Ben said over the din of slugthrower fire. "Cover us while we pull these doors open."

I nodded at him and scan the building above us for enemy fire which wasn't much since we were now outside the shooter's line of sight. My father and Ben closed their eyes and their faces distorted into a look of fierce concentration. I see the double doors in front of the building shake violently before they were forcefully yanked off their hinges and thrown across the street. "Now!" Ben said to me indicating it was our time to rush in and make a lot of noise.

I followed behind Dad and Ben all pumped up and confident. My green lightsaber was blazing, and then…I hate to admit it…I stopped dead in my tracks and froze at the sight before me. We found the hostages, or what was left of them. They were tied to chairs facing the door. Most were stripped of their clothing exposing the horrific wounds and mutilation they suffered. I have heard the term 'skinned alive' used metaphorically, but this wasn't a figurative use of the term, and they were obviously alive when it happened. Their mouths were taped shut, but their eyes…the ones who still had their eyes…showed the sheer horror of their demise. Before I knew what was happening I doubled over and vomited.

I am not sure how long I was out of action but I eventually became aware we were under heavy blaster fire.

"Talon! Talon!" I could hear Ben's strained voice. "Pull it together! I can't keep the blaster fire off you forever."

I look up and Ben's blue lightsaber is a blur of motion as he deflected blaster bolts away from both of us. Ben's usual boyish freckled-faced appearance was gone and replaced by an intense expression that made him look much older than his twenty-one years...and I was amazed at his immense power in the Force; it was as if the Grand Master himself was next to me. If that GA Lieutenant was around to see Ben fight there would have been absolutely no confusion whatsoever as to who was the _true_ son of Skywalker.

My face flushed as I wiped the back of my hand across my mouth. "Sorry Ben," I am able to croak out before I brought my lightsaber up and started deflecting the blaster bolts coming my way.

I can feel a jumble of emotions coming from my father. There was shock, sadness and a grim, intense resolve to end this now. The room we were in was probably once used as a warehouse. There was a one-story office that was built onto the empty floor of the large three-story room. Gunmen were positioned on the top of the building and there were also a couple terrorists on a small access skywalk located a little over two meters from the ceiling.

My Dad ran toward the terrorists positioned on the office roof, deflecting blasterbolts as he moved, before he leapt the three meters to the roof of the building. He decapitated the first man he came to and then he brought his oversized lightsaber crashing down on the other man's head. I have seen holovids where men were cleaved in half by a lightsaber, but I have never seen it done from head to groin. The sight was gruesome and the bile crept up my throat once again.

Ben stretched out his hand and used the Force to pull the other men off the skywalk. My father cleanly sliced them in two before they hit the ground.

Finally, there was silence with the exception of the hum of the lightsabers and my heavy breathing.

"Tantiss here," I heard my father's voice as he called into his comlink. "The entry room is clear. Four terrorists are dead. There are eleven other bodies, possibly the hostages. Two of them look like children."

It wasn't until the last sentence that I heard my father's voice falter.

He shut off the comlink and calmly walked off the roof of the office, using the Force to cushion his fall. There was a clatter of boots as GA Military personnel swarmed the room, but I barely registered their presence. I was still in a fog. I remember Ben putting a hand on my shoulder and saying something to me, but I don't remember what was said. I do remember my father coming up to me and pulling me out of the building.

I was so embarrassed. I had let everybody down. I let Ben down, my Master Mara Jade Skywalker, the Grand Master and worst of all, my father. The shame was so intense that my face heated uncomfortably as the blood rushed to my head. My dad's hand as firmly clutching my shoulder as he steered me away from the commotion to a quiet place where I assumed he would tell me how disappointed he was.

We went to an abandoned public square that had duracrete benches surrounded an old decrepit fountain. My father guided me to a bench and gestured for me to sit. He sat down and stared at me silently for a moment before he talked. "Talon…that was not something you should have seen on your first time out. What happened in there was awful."

I dropped my head. "I know I did awful. I'm sorry Dad. I could have gotten Ben killed."

"No, no, what happened to the hostages was awful." My father reached over and gave my shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "Talon, you pulled yourself together after a few seconds. You did fine."

I shook my head. "No, I didn't. Ben didn't hesitate. I shouldn't have." I paused for a moment. "If Mom had let me train in real combat situations earlier…"

I didn't get to finish my sentence. My father's hand—that seconds earlier was giving me a reassuring squeeze—now clamped down on me painfully. He looked me directly in the eye and glared intensely. "Don't you dare blame your mother for anything that happened today." He pointed toward the building holding the dead hostages. "Seeing the depths of human depravity like we did today changes a man. Not one soldier that entered that building today will forget what he saw. It will haunt their sleep, it will cause anxiety attacks and trouble coping…and I'm talking about hardened combat soldiers."

He must have seen me flinch at his grip because he let go of my shoulder and gave me an apologetic look. "It changes men," he said softly. "Your mother and I wanted you to have the chance at a non-traumatic, un-kriffed up childhood before something horrific like this warped your view of the galaxy. A happy childhood is something a lot of us didn't have. Your Aunt Mara was raised as the Emperor's Hand, your Uncle Luke lived in harsh desert conditions, and I never had a childhood. You deserved to have some nice youthful memories before the horror of war was thrust upon you."

His words made me feel better, but not by much. "Why were my cousins allowed to train in real world situations if it's so bad?"

My father sat back and took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "When you are a Solo or a Skywalker you are a target for kidnappers, assassins and nutball Jedi stalkers. Your cousins needed to be able to protect themselves at a very young age. You are a Tantiss and we don't have the problem with notoriety." He gave me a small smile. "Excluding some lovechild sleemo stories, we're unknowns…and that's good! If you think being a celebrity Jedi is a blessing, think again."

"I know." I said as I shifted in my seat uncomfortably. "We're lucky."

My father laughed. "You are damn right we're lucky. Not only do we avoid the publicity, but also you have a huge extended family compared to your cousins. You have your mother's family…grandparents that dote on you and your brother. You also have your mother's brothers and their kids and all her cousins."

Dad paused and looked to the ground before he stood. "Don't let your performance today get to you. You did great for a first time out. I'm proud of you."

Dad left me sitting there. It was nice of him to say I did well, but I know I didn't. I swore right then and there that I wouldn't fail again. I promised myself I would train harder and longer. Never again would another Jedi have to protect me while I stood frozen like a dewback in the speeder headlights.

_Never again!_


	6. Chapter 6

**_ENTRY 17_ **

That was an awkward flight home. I spent most of the time meditating so I didn't have to talk to my father or Ben. I am still terribly embarrassed by my performance and who knows how long I will be haunted by the memories of what I saw that day.

I know I swore that I would become a better Jedi, but now I am wondering if I even want to be a Jedi at all. Is this going to be my life? Called in to horrible situations, rushing into danger and killing people?

My parents often told me they didn't care what I did for a living as long as it was honest work…and I know they meant it. I don't think my father would be upset at all if I gave up being a Jedi to become a doctor, an engineer or even a chef like my mother.

Still, I have been training to be a Jedi since I was a small child. It is hard to give up on something I've spent over a decade training to become.

I need to think about this some more.

.

.

**_ENTRY 18_ **

My brother came into my room to see me a few days after my return. I was lying on my bed with my eyes closed. Jaden's pitten, Fuzzy, was sleeping on my chest making a rumbling noise that pittens make when they're happy.

"Hey, Talon. You awake?" he asked.

"I'm meditating," I lied.

He scoffed. "Yeah right, you like meditating as much as Dad does."

I opened my eyes to look at him. "What do you want Jaden?"

My brother came into the room and grabbed my desk chair. He spun it around and sat in it backwards with his arms propped top of the backrest. "Your Master and the Grand Master asked me to come and talk to you. They figured you would open up to your brother."

I had to laugh. "Why would they think that?"

Jaden grinned. "Because neither of them grew up with a little brother. They are a bit clueless."

I rolled my eyes. "They have three sons and a daughter, you would think they would figure out siblings don't always like each other."

He shrugged. "They have the twins with that creepy Force bond." He gave me a wide smirk. "Maybe they think all brothers are that…chummy."

I chuckled. I love my cousins Jak and Owen, but their closeness is weird and it's not just their tendency to finish each other's sentences. They are always together and they gesture the same, have similar speech patterns, mannerisms and the same laugh. I am fairly certain those two communicate through the Force…either that or they are masters at picking up non-verbal clues from each other.

"Talon, everybody is worried about you since you returned from your first mission. You have been withdrawn and you haven't gotten into any trouble in days…so they know this is serious. If you don't have a heart-to-heart talk with me they are going to make you see a Jedi trauma healer, also known as a psychiatrist…like they did with me after my first blood-filled mission."

I looked over to him while running my hands down Fuzzy's soft fur. I like being around the pitten when I am nervous or upset…for some reason the animal calms me. "You had to see a counselor? I didn't know that."

Jaden looked down at the ground. "Well, I did." He looked back and gave me an amused look. "You really don't want to see Jedi Healer Rogek…I don't know what she learned at the University of Coruscanti about human behavior, but she was positive my anxiety and depression had something to do with an unknown trauma I endured during my childhood which stunted my psychosexual development. Apparently my toilet training was too harsh or something." My brother laughed. "Of course, it couldn't be that I saw twenty men die on my first mission, most of them burned and torn apart from an artillery barrage. Nah…it couldn't be that." He shook his head in disbelief. "So unless you want a long, deep discussion with a female Twi'lek about what's going on in your subconscious mind…I suggest you talk to me…and then maybe we can go out and have a few ales before doing something really stupid to irritate the Grand Master." He hesitated for a moment. "That'll be the only way he'll know you are back to normal. Maybe we can hide a crystal snake in Jacen's bathroom again."

I smirked at that comment before I sighed dramatically. I know Jaden is right. The Jedi have recently started looking into anxiety and stress disorders within their ranks. A person can only slice so many people in half before it starts messing with their mind. If I don't talk to him I will be talking to Jedi Rogek.

"What do you want to talk about?"

"What's bothering you?" Jaden said. "It can't be anything I haven't experienced."

I scratched behind the pitten's ears and she happily started massaging her claws into my shirt. "I froze when I saw the dead hostages. Not only that but I had to watch my own father slice and dice terrorists with his lightsaber." I paused for a long moment. "It creeped me out a bit. I knew dad had killed people while in combat, but I always pictured him with a blaster shooting people…something less personal than splitting a guy in half with his lightsaber."

Jaden gave me a look of understanding. "It's disturbing to know someone you love is capable of such violence, but you know dad…he's loving and caring. He kills people who are trying to murder him. And he doesn't like it at all. He told me. He said he hates using the lightsaber, but when the higher-ups want Jedi going in for the shock-and-awe factor…nothing beats a lightsaber to scare the crap out of the enemy."

"I guess."

"Talon, you don't need to become a Jedi. Or if you do, you don't have to be a Guardian like Dad. You can be a healer, pilot, security expert, instructor, Consular, or slicer. The possibilities are endless."

"I want to be like Dad." I told him. "I see how everybody respects him in the Temple. I saw how he interacted with the soldiers in the field. There was a camaraderie there that I liked." I lifted Fuzzy off my chest as I swung my legs off the bed so I was in a sitting position. I kept the pitten in my lap, petting her. "I think I am mostly embarrassed about puking my guts out while Ben saved my sorry butt."

Jaden let out a loud laugh. "You puked! Nobody told me that. That's funny."

I frowned and put the pitten down on the bed before I jumped up and punched Jaden on the shoulder.

"Owww," he laughed as he stood up and put distance between us. "Don't get to upset brother. I don't want you losing your lunch."

"That's it, you're dead." I chased after Jaden getting him into a headlock.

He was still laughing. "There's the Talon Tantiss I know and don't love." He managed to break free and backed up holding his hands out defensively. "Talon, why don't we go out and celebrate the return of my obnoxious brother. I'll buy."

The anger drained away from me and I smiled at the thought of getting out of the Temple for a while. "Okay, as long a you're buying."

 

**.**

**.**

**_ENTRY 19_ **

Jaden and I went out that night after swinging by the Skywalker quarters and getting Ben to come with us. I think Jaden thought it would be best that I spent time with Ben…so we could maybe talk about what happened on the mission. Jaden had some college friends that were going to a celebration at the lower levels of Coruscant called the Fashinfest. The Fashinfest is a religious festival, which is low on religion and heavy on debauchery. It is part of the Duken Religion. I was told the Dukenites were a small religious group who would spend one month each year meditating and daylight fasting during a time called the _phase of purification._ During this phase the Duken followers take a vow of silence, they abstain from sex and they don't eat during the day with the exception of one small meal after sunset.

Of course, the _phase of purification_ is of _NO_ interest to young men like us from the upper levels…not at all. We like the week _prior_ , which is called the Fashinfest. During this festival the Dukenites get as drunk as possible, party on the streets and make out with just about any sentient being that moves. Anything goes that week. It's such a popular event that probably seventy-five percent of the festival participants don't even know what a Dukenite is or what their religion entails.

I don't think my parents would approve of us going to the fest, but what they don't know won't hurt them. At least there will be three Jedi together, so we'll have somebody to watch our backs. It is best that upper level people go in groups because of pickpockets and hoodlums who like to rob drunken tourists.

Jaden is navigating via his small datapad. He was told a good place to go is a tavern called the _Shrill Veermok._ What a sweet name. A veermok is a large, mean primate that was native to Naboo, but some of the exotic creatures were brought to Coruscant for zoos and exotic pets and later escaped. Rumor has it there is a population of these predators roaming the lower levels of Coruscant.

"There it is," Ben said as he pointed down the walkway. We moved toward the tavern, jostling our way down a street that was wall-to-wall people. Most of the beings in attendance were clutching drinks in one hand and throwing credit chips at the ladies in exchange for them flashing their breasts. That's illegal during Fashinfest and Law Enforcement will arrest women doing it and often the guys urging them on. Although there is a temptation to stop and watch the strip show we don't need a run in with the law so we kept moving.

We each had bought a low-alcohol drink from a tavern down the street. It was some blue concoction in a clear polymer mug that had little lights underneath that made the drink pulsate in color. It tasted good and it allowed us to party and remain relatively sober.

We finally made it to the _Shrill Veermok_ and elbowed our way to the rear of the tavern where there was a dance floor and intense nightclub laser lights that probably caused more than one patron to have seizures. Most of the crowd was up in the front of the establishment because walking to tavern-to-tavern was the mainstay during the fest. We found a table and sat down and nursed our drinks.

"Grab three more chairs," my brother insisted.

"Why?" I asked.

He rolled his eyes and looked at me like I was stupid. "For the girls. That's what we came here for…to meet the ladies."

I grabbed a couple chairs from the empty table next to us. I am not inexperienced when it comes to dating. I dated a few female Jedi in the past few years, but I wasn't really confident when it came to picking up strangers and I can't see Ben or my shy brother Jaden doing any better.

"So when are these elusive women going to materialize?" Ben asked with a chuckle.

I looked over to Ben and cringed. The red laserlight was shining over him making his reddish-gold hair look bright flaming red…and the light actually brought out the freckles on his face. Oh boy, this is going to be a rough night for my cousin.

"We go up and invite some ladies to sit with us." Jaden said.

Ben laughed. "Yeah, that's going to happen."

To my surprise Jaden stood. "Well, I didn't come here to sit in the back room polishing my lightsaber. I'll go get some girls."

He walks off to the bar. Ben and I look at each other amused. This is going to be fun to see my big brother get shot down.

"Oh Force," Ben mumbled a few minutes later as he pointed in the direction Jaden had went.

I look up and there is my brother returning with three lovely ladies. Two humans and one very well proportioned red Twi'lek in tight, tight clothing. "Oh wow," I gasped.

My brother had his arm around a petite brunette so I figured the other human and Twi'lek would be our dates. "Which one you want?" I whispered to Ben.

He gave me a smile that looked just like a Han Solo grin. "Red is my favorite color."

Jaden arrived and started introducing the ladies. He gestured with his head to the woman he had an arm around. "This is Kelli." He motioned to a tall, buxom blond. "This is Sara. And the beautiful Twi'lek is Niki."

Ben did not hesitate. He put his hand out to the Twi'lek and smiled. "Nice to meet you Niki. I'm Ben. Would you like a seat?" He guided her to the chair next to him and Sara came around to where I sat.

"Hello Sara," I said with a smile. "I'm Jaden's brother Talon."

She smiled and sat next to me. I signaled for the waiter and ordered drinks for the ladies. The music changed from a hard beat to an exotic dance tune. One that was more conducive to provocative dances like daggering or Kriff dancing. To my surprise Jaden grabs Kelli's hand and pulls her to the dance floor. Ben and I stared at him slack jawed as he busted out his dance moves.

"What the hell is he doing?" Ben asked and even in the red laser light I can tell he was blushing.

I looked at Jaden and Kelli on the dance floor. "If it wasn't for the fact that their clothes are on I would have sworn they were having sex standing up."

"Where did he learn to dance like that?" Ben asked sounding bemused.

The red Twi'lek turned to Ben. "In dance class, silly."

"My brother goes to dance class?" I couldn't take my eyes off the dance floor I was so astonished.

"It is an extracurricular club at the college." Sara spoke up. "We are all students there and take dance lessons together."

Okay, now things were starting to add up. My brother didn't become the biggest pick-up artist in the galaxy, he knew these women from the University he attended.

"Jaden is the most popular dancer," Niki said. "There are not many men in the club and the women fight over him."

"Really!" I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

"Really," Sara said as she stood and pulled me out of my seat. "Come on I'll teach you."

I saw Niki pull a grinning Ben Skywalker out of his chair as they moved to the dance floor.

It would take too long for me to write all the crazy stuff that happened in the club that night, but I would like to point out a couple things. First of all, I really, really suck at dancing…and Ben is actually good. That Twi'lek was guiding him around the dance floor like they were attached at the hips…which they were half the time. She was a little shorter than Ben and her head would rest against his shoulder, her lekku twitching in pleasure, as Ben's hands clasped her backside.

I still can't believe my redheaded, freckled faced cousin had his hands all over the most beautiful female in the club! And she was loving it! What the hell! I felt like I was in _'Opposite World'_ where Ben and my shy brother became sex symbols and I was the Dug of the group.

Near the end of the evening I look over to Sara and Kelli and they are smashed. Which was odd since none of us had more than two or three drinks all night. Niki was still amiably chatting with Ben and looking completely sober. Either Twi'leks can really hold their liquor or she didn't drink as much as her friends.

Sara and Kelli announced they had to go to the 'fresher. I don't know why women go in groups, but they do. Either their bladders synchronize with each other when they are in close proximity or maybe they just want to talk about us guys. I can visualize Sara complaining about how that heavy-footed blond Jedi had busted two of her toes from repeatedly stepping on them while dancing.

"Hey Niki," I called out to Ben's date who was practically sitting on his lap. "How much did Sara and Kelli drink before we got here?"

She turned around and smiled. "Only one, but they're lightweights. I've only seen them drink once before and they were tipsy after one drink."

"Oh boy." I hate dealing with drunks. They either hate you or you're their _'very best friend in the galaxy'_ and often those two opposite views can alternate within a matter of minutes.

Finally the two women returned and as they moved across the dance floor Sara starts slurring out the infamous Coruscanti mating call, known to all males galaxy-wide.

"I am soooooo drunk."

That caught the attention of two leering males that intercepted them before they reached our table. Jaden groaned as he got up. "Come on Talon. It's time to get the ladies home. They live in the school dorms."

So I stood and we walk over to these guys. They are lower-level locals from the looks of it. They are large, muscular men with tattoos all over their arms and greasy slicked back hair.

We came up along side of the ladies and reached out, putting our hands around their waists possessively. "The ladies are with us gentlemen," my brother said with a tight smile.

The local brutes didn't smile back. They gave us the most evil look I have seen since the last time I irritated Jacen. "Kriff off you two bluemilk-drinking, chunder-heads."

Now, that wasn't a nice thing to say.

"You kriff off, you mopak-eating di'kuts," Jaden shot back.

HA! What are they teaching my brother at that University?!

I noticed Ben wandered up while grinning. The last time we got to punch nerfherders like this was during Anakin's bachelor party.

The bigger of the two men hauled off to sock my brother, but Jaden quickly brought his hand up and grabbed the man's fist midswing, halting it a couple centimeters short from his face. The guy looks down at his fist in shock. Jaden is a big guy, but normally it would be physically impossible for somebody to do that…without the Force. Apparently, Jaden doesn't shy away from using the Force when he needs to.

"Go away," Ben said to the two men. The two brutes backed up a step looking confused before they wandered off in a stupor.

And...obviously my cousin has mastered the Jedi mind trick.

Kelli looked at Jaden and gave him a seductive smile as she felt his biceps. "Wow, you are strong."

That's what she said, but it came out somewhat slurred. We decided it was time to get these young ladies back home safely.

We took an airtaxi and guided our two overly intoxicated ladies friends up to their room. It turns out the two humans were roommates. I look over to Niki who was snuggled up to Ben as they walked together. His hand was around her waist and she had her hand tucked into Ben's back pocket. I noticed the top two buttons of her skimpy outfit were now undone giving Ben a clear view down her cleavage. They were chatting away happily. There wasn't so much as a slur to her voice, so she must have not had much to drink. Lucky Ben. Jaden and I get the two lushes.

We bring Sara and Kelli to their room. Ben says he will see us a little later; he was going to escort Niki to her room. We got the girls on their beds, but immediately Sara jumps up and rushes to the 'fresher. I then heard the sound of gagging and the young lady purging herself of her night's drinks.

"That's attractive," I said to Jaden. "Where did you meet her? At an Alcoholics Recovery meeting."

Jaden looked at Kelli who was lying on the bed looking very unconscious. "No, they are pre-med students like me. They didn't drink that much. I don't think they are used to drinking at all."

I moved toward the door. "Come on lets go."

Jaden shook his head. "I don't want to leave them like this. They could die. There is nothing worse than choking on your own vomit."

"Sure there is," I said.

He gave me a puzzled look. "And what would that be?"

"Choking on somebody else's vomit." I laughed. I guess Kelli wasn't completely unconscious because she started dry gagging at my comment. She bolted out of bed and ran to the bathroom and threw up in a trashcan since Sara was occupying the toilet.

My brother gave me an nasty look. "You're gross Talon."

"I just want to leave. It is starting to smell funky in here. If they are really that drunk we should call a medic."

Jaden made a face. "We should, but they are here on a religious scholarship. Kelli told me about it. I don't know if their religion allows excessive drunkeness."

"What?" I looked over to the puking pair. "They are obviously not Duken."

Jaden shook his head. "No they belong to a small spiritual order from the planet Axum called the _Sisters of the Sacred Way_."

I shook my head in disbelief. "You mean the spew sisters are really _'Sisters'_ in the religious way?"

"No, they are believers, not spiritual teachers or clergy." My brother gave me a pleading look. "Let's just stay for a little while to make sure they're safe."

"Fine."

That was just great. We have to wait until they purged enough alcohol from their system before we could take off. I pulled a chair way from a desk and sat down. After an hour of hearing the ladies lying on the cool 'fresher floor sobbing, _'I will never, ever drink again'_ there was a light rap on the door. I really hoped it wasn't the dorm attendant. I opened the door and found Ben outside with a concerned look on his face.

"What are you guys doing?" he pushed his way past me and looked around. "I hope you two don't intend on staying the night." His voice lowered to a whisper. "Talon, they're too drunk to consent to anything."

I made a disgusted face at my cousin. "Ben, I assure you I have no intention of taking a ride on the vomit comet." I pointed to the girls lying on the floor in the 'fresher. "What kind of sleemo do you think I am?"

"Ben, we just wanted to make sure they are alright before we left." Jaden clarified our intentions. He looked back at the girls. "They look okay now. Let's get them into bed, but put then on their stomach just to be safe."

"Okay," I sighed as I went and picked up my date. Her eyes opened halfway and she smiled.

"There's my sexy Jedi. Can I see your lightsaber?"

Oh Force. She smelled like vomit and her hands were _everywhere_. I dump her on a bed as fast as I could and backed away. Jaden did the same.

"Let's go," Jaden said. We walked out of their dorm room, closing the door behind us.

I turned to Ben. "I thought you went back to the Temple. What have you been doing for the last hour?"

Ben's face turned redder than his hair. "Just talking," he said softly.

_LIAR!_

Jaden grinned at our cousin. "By talking do you mean, ' _Oh Niki, Niki! Spank me with your lekkus'_?"

Ben blushed a deeper red as he gave my brother a punch on the shoulder. "I thought you were pre-med. Everybody knows Twi'lek head-tails are very sensitive. It would cause her intense pain to use them as a whip."

I let out a loud laugh. "Since when did you become an expert in Twi'lek biology? Did you take an in depth crash course in the last hour?"

"Like I said, we talked for a while." He gave me a smug smile. "She found my red hair exotic. She said she rarely sees that color in human males."

"She found you exotic." I started laughing. "Details! I want details!"

Ben shook his head. "We were just talking. That is the only detail you are getting from me."

Shavit! My cousin is no fun.

We made it back to the Temple without any problems. Despite the disappointing end of the evening it was good to get out and have fun with Ben and Jaden. It did cheer me up and it helped me temporarily forget about my horrible first mission.

And three weeks later I had another big distraction. I was served with a court order to appear at a DNA testing site for a paternity test. It seems Sara, the lady with the religious scholarship, was pregnant.

Unless you can get pregnant from dancing badly…I am not the father.

Stang! My Mom and Dad were yelling at me, and now I was being summoned to see the Grand Master and my Master (Aunt Mara).

Why does stuff like this always happen to me?


	7. Chapter 7

**_ENTRY 20_ **

I just came back from seeing the Grand Master and my Master today. It was awful. My parents were there also.

I was called into Uncle Luke's office and was told to sit in a chair across from his desk. The Grand Master was sitting at his desk in full Jedi regalia and looking really irritated.

He held up the paternity test court order. "Do you know how bad this looks? I have the University President and Dean of Students calling me up and asking me what type of organization I am running. The Department Chair of the Medical School even went so far as to ask me if you used the Force to _'influence'_ this girl into bed!" My uncle's voice rose angrily as he spoke.

I have gotten into a lot of trouble before, but I honestly have never seen my Uncle Luke this upset. This is worse than the _lovechild_ fiasco.

He forcefully tossed the court order on his desk. "This incident is bringing dishonor to the Jedi Order. What do you have to say for yourself?"

I remember swallowing hard and having problems talking. "I never had sex with her. The test will show I am not the father. I'll be exonerated. I just assisted her back to her dorm. I was never with her alone. Jaden was with me in her room the entire time."

"What!" my mother yelled as she grabbed her comlink. "Jaden get to the Grand Master's office NOW!"

"Ben was there also!" I pointed out.

"Ben!" my Aunt Mara yelled and she pulled out her comlink and ordered Ben to get to the office.

My brother and cousin show up a few minutes later looking nervous. Jaden tells them the whole sorted story and how I was never alone with the women and we were just trying to help them. Jaden is good at making a terrible situation sound reasonable.

My uncle calmed down a bit, but he ran his hands through his hair looking frustrated. "Talon, we will discuss this after the paternity results come back. Until then you are restricted to the Temple. I don't need the media getting a hold of you. You're all dismissed." We prepared to leave, but Uncle Luke stopped us. "Wait! Ben, Jaden…go with him to the testing center. I want you all tested. I want to put this issue to bed."

I couldn't help but give an amused snort; he could have phrased that better. The Grand Master gave me a withering glare, which stamped out any amusement I felt at that moment.

"It's bad enough that one Jedi is accused of impregnating a drunk college girl," Uncle Luke pointed to his son and Jaden. "I don't want her to start looking at you two as a possible father of her child when Talon is exonerated."

A small smiled graced my face. I felt a little better that the Grand Master believed I would be exonerated.

As I left the office my father came up beside me. "You better be telling the truth, Talon." He regarded me contemplatively. "I taught you to respect women. I hope that was a lesson you took to heart."

"Yes, Dad," I said softly.

He looked at me for a long pause before he smiled. "I believe you." He put his hand on my shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze. "I'm glad things are getting back to normal for you since the mission."

I had to laugh. Things getting back to normal for me meant I was in trouble. Why is that? Stang! First I have women gossiping on the HoloNet about my supposedly sexual prowess and now I am slammed with a paternity suit.

What next?

 

**.**

**.**

**_ENTRY 21_ **

I can't wait until the paternity results are in so things can get back to normal. I have no idea why Sara is accusing me of such a thing. Jaden talked to Kelli and she said Sara doesn't remember having sex with anyone and that night was the only night she was drunk. She hadn't had any alcohol to drink after that night and since she remembered me being in her dorm room…she naturally assumed I did the deed.

I had asked Jaden "Why didn't she suspect you!"

My brother blushed. "I have a reputation as being the good guy and…well, according to the holonet, you have a reputation as a smooth-talking womanizer who likes bedroom roleplaying games and spanking women with toy lightsabers."

I rolled my eyes. I wish I were a smooth talking womanizer—that would mean I was getting some action. As for the rest of those rumors…I think they got the wrong Tantiss. I'll always remember finding a box of costumes in my father's closet when I was seven or eight years old. My dad never explained why he had a clone trooper helmet, an Imperial Admiral uniform, a Boba Fett outfit and fur-lined stuncuffs crammed in a box in the back of his closet. I still shudder at the implications. Ewww!

"That's just great," I grumbled to my brother.

Jaden shrugged. "It could be worse. I heard weird rumors that Raynar Thul suffers from _species dysphoria_ and Jacen has an _acrotomophilia_ fetish."

I frown at my pre-med brother. "I hate physician jokes. I end up having to look these things up online before I understand the humor."

My brother just laughed and, once again, didn't explain his comments. I guess I'll be on the holonet tonight doing a definition search.

Shavit! I can't believe all the screwed up poodoo that has been happening in my life lately. I am very close to giving up and start living up to my bad boy holonet persona. If I am going to get in trouble for things I might as well have fun doing the deeds.

I decided that the way to get my mind off of the entire situation was to concentrate on my training. I had asked Master Corran Horn to help me with my hand-to-hand instruction and my Master Mara Jade Skywalker to assist me with the lightsaber.

Today I worked with my Aunt Mara on lightsaber techniques. We were using the practice sabers again so we wouldn't need to hold back. I did fairly well, but I really doubt if I will ever be able to beat my Master.

She was still a little irritated with me for involving her son in my nocturnal activities. "I can't believe you brought my son down to the Fashinfest!" Aunt Mara almost snarled at me while we sparred. Her green eyes glared at me intensely as she tried to put as many welts on my body as possible. Damn she's good with the lightsaber.

"He is a grown man," I pointed out to her. "He's older than me or my brother." I blocked a series of intense lightsaber attacks barely avoiding what would have been a fatal blow to my head if we weren't using practice weapons.

"Still, he wouldn't have been on the lower levels of Coruscant at that depraved festival if it wasn't for you."

I parried her attack and countered which she blocked easily. "You're right Aunt Mara. It's entirely my fault. Ben was minding his own business when Jaden and I pulled up in our speeder and lured him into the vehicle with the promise of candy." I then lowered my voice in an attempt to sound menacing. " _Hey little boy, do you want some candy?_ " I then went to my normal voice. "Once we had him under our control we used a Jedi mind trick to coerce him to the lower levels. We then forced him to dance all night with the most beautiful female in the club. My brother and I are pure evil!"

I saw Mara's lips twitch as she tried to suppress a smile. "He was dancing with a beautiful woman all night?"

"Yes and the young lady appeared quite infatuated with him." I gave her a grin. "According to Ben, she found red hair on human males very exotic."

"Human males?" my Aunt Mara looked confused. "What species was this female?"

"Twi'lek."

I see my aunt roll her eyes before she swings her lightsaber trying to take me out at the knees. I jumped and rolled out of danger. "What's wrong? You don't like Twi'leks?"

She shook her head. "It's not that. When Luke and I started dating I heard rumors from some of his Rogue buddies about him having an eye for the Twi'leks." She blocked my lightsaber attack and countered with one of her own. "It must be something genetic." She signaled for a break and we deactivated our lightsabers. "Was she a dancer working there?"

I shook my head. "No, she's a pre-med student the same as Jaden."

"Nice," She nodded as she grabbed a water bottle. "Hopefully Ben's college girl won't get him in trouble like yours did."

"Sara is not my girlfriend," I protested. "And I don't think you have to worry. Jaden told me that Twi'lek and humans can only conceived through in vitro fertilization. He said something about gametic incompatibility. So there's no way Ben could have gotten his Twi'lek lady friend pregnant that night"

My Aunt Mara choked on her water. "What? I thought he was with you the entire time."

_Stang!_ Ben is going to kill me for discussing his love life with his mother.

"Umm…he was with me for some of the time." I looked at my wristchrono. "Wow! It's getting late. I have a meditation class to go to." I then ran to the exit. "See you Aunt Mara!"

As I moved out of the training room I could feel my aunt's eyes boring into my back. Oh well…Ben is twenty-years-old. His mother can't expect him to be a virgin all his life. And Ben said he was just talking…Ha! Yeah right.

Still…I don't think Ben is going to be happy with me for mentioning anything.

.

.

**_ENTRY 22_ **

The DNA results came back and _I AM NOT THE FATHER!_

' _In your face Sara!'_

Okay, I didn't say that to her while I was in court, but I wanted to…until she started crying. Also I think every Force-user in the room could feel her tremendous surprise and shock. Obviously Sara _really_ thought I was her baby's daddy. Her parents were yelling at her asking how she could not know the identity of the father. Her dad addressed the Judge saying I obviously used the Force to change my DNA to falsify the results. Luckily Uncle Luke was there with me and he assured the judge that Jedi couldn't change their genetic code.

I don't know why I feel like I did something wrong. I guess I don't like to see a young lady in such a predicament.

I am staying away from college girls. In fact the only female that is going to be in my bed for a long while is Jaden's pitten, Fuzzy.

Hopefully this is the last of my bad luck with women…but I have a feeling I won't be that lucky.

.

.

**_ENTRY 23_ **

Ben should have been knighted after his last mission, but he said he didn't want that horrific situation with the hostages to be the mission that culminates in his knighthood. He wanted to end his apprenticeship on a more positive note.

He requested that I accompany him again on a mission as back up. I think he also wanted me to have a more positive experience when it came to missions. Ben's a pretty good guy. This time my Master—Mara Jade Skywalker—would accompany me along with my dad who is Ben's Master.

We travelled to the planet Seylott. It is an outer rim jungle planet and home to a sentient bipedal, mammalian species named after its planet. They are tall, muscular humanoid beings with long arms, large stomachs and whiskered flat faces made them look like Klepthian rock otters. The Seylott people use their elongated arms to swing on branches and vines on the forest world. Although they spend a lot of time in the trees in the past they had built massive temples and stone monuments on the ground. Once they had a great peaceful society, but for some unknown reason there was a big decline in their culture sometime during the Clone Wars. Now their massive monuments are in ruins and all that remained of their thriving culture were pockets of primitive tribes living throughout the rainforest.

What was really interesting about the Seylott species is almost all were Force-sensitive. They didn't understand the Force like the Jedi do. Instead they interpreted the Force as a god called Shaa, which was a deity that consisted of the mother and infant. It was a duality where the two were part of the one. Or that is what I was told. I was never a student of religion. I know there are thousands of worshiped gods throughout the galaxy. The Jedi believe these are all interpretations of the Force, but we are told not to discuss this conviction with people who believe in a god or gods or other variations of a higher power. It is not polite to do so and it could cause a political and cultural backlash. We are taught to respect all religions.

I look forward to meeting a Seylott native. I have never even seen this species in holoreports. They are very wary of outsiders and are never seen off planet.

The reason we were on Seylott was because we were investigating reports of excavating companies illegally setting up Phrik mines on the planet. The mining companies claim they have permission from the Seylott shamans who act as leaders of the various clans. Unfortunately, nobody could find the elusive Seylott people to verify the story and that made the Galactic Alliance wonder if these indigenous tribes may have been slaughtered by some of the disreputable mining companies in order to maintain their claims.

The planet's thick jungles and large amount of wildlife made it almost impossible to locate the small pockets of Seylott tribes and that's why the Jedi were on planet. Since the Seylott species are almost all Force sensitive it is hoped that they could be located by other Force sensitives.

We got planet side at night and were waiting for sunrise before we began the search. It's been raining since we got here. I really hope it stops before we have to leave base camp.

We are with a Galactic Alliance company of ground troopers. My Dad, Ben and I were sleeping in a medium size troop tent with a couple GA officers. My Master was in a small troop tent with another woman in the field. I wish we could have stayed together, but the company commander didn't want any sexual harassment charges…which was stupid if just the four of us had a shelter together. We are all related to each other, after all. But I guess they didn't have enough tents. My dad said it might be better that my aunt is in an all female tent away from the men. He was sure my aunt would have killed most of the young and stupid soldiers that can't censor their thoughts while around a beautiful woman. My Aunt Mara is almost fifty years old, but she doesn't look it and I noticed she turned a number of heads when she came into the camp. I heard a couple guys about Ben's age calling her a _milk._ I was told that meant a _'mother I'd like to kriff'_. Ben was furious when he heard that.

A Galactic Alliance officer came into our tent with camouflage coveralls bundled up in his arms. He was a tall muscular man with a nasty scar running from his hairline to his jaw. I have noticed that many of the men had foregone reconstructive surgery or bacta immersions and instead decided to exhibit their scars as badges of honor.

"This is the rainy season," The officer said. "You can expect to be wet day and night." He started handing out the clothing. "These are durawick coveralls. They are waterproof, but they are vented and made of a fabric that wicks moisture away from your body."

He handed out one to Ben and me. When he came to my father he gave an apologetic look. "I couldn't find one to fit you that was made for a human, but I was able to get a Wookiee durawick suit. It's been washed."

My dad made a face when he reached into the suit and pulled out hair.

The officer handed a smaller uniform to my father. "This is a small men's coverall. It should fit your female."

It was funny when all of us chuckled at the same time. My father smiled. "She's not our female. It's more like we're her males."

The officer's eyebrows rose slightly. "Okay…well, ummm…there is a special way to wear these…"

"I know how they're worn," my father interrupted.

The officer nodded his head. "Fine," he said before leaving us in the tent alone.

My father tossed the small coveralls to me. "Give these to your aunt and tell her not to wear any underwear with them."

I caught the outfit midair and then looked at my father stunned. "What?"

My father opened up the coveralls to show me the interior. "These coveralls have built in underwear netting...mainly for male support. Even though they are waterproof you will probably sweat despite the venting. If you wear regular underwear it will cause your skin to be constantly wet and you will end up with a raging case of prickly heat."

"Why do I have to tell Aunt Mara she needs to go commando under these coveralls?"

My father shrugged. "Because I said so."

I hate that answer. I get it from Mom, Dad and my Master. "Fine," I grumbled as I pulled on my raincoat I brought from Coruscant and ran over to my Aunt Mara's tent with the coveralls. When I got there I yelled for her. "Aunt Mara! Are you in there? Can I come in?"

She pulled back the door flap and motioned me to enter. The tent had two cots, but my aunt was the only person present at the time. I handed her the durawick coveralls. "Dad wanted me to give you these. And ummm…well, there is a certain way you are supposed to wear them." I hoped she would say she knew how to wear them so I could avoid embarrassment.

She stared at me curiously. "And that is?"

I felt my face heat up. "You are supposed to go without underwear when wearing them."

She raised an eyebrow. "No bra?"

"Ummm…"

"No panties?"

"I uh…I guess." I stammer.

"How about a lace teddy?"

My jaw dropped. I am fairly certain she's joking, but I don't like the images that just popped into my head.

My aunt laughed. "I know how to wear durawick coveralls." She smirked. "In fact I was the one that taught your father how to wear them. I think your Dad wanted to embarrass you." She chuckled as she held the outfit out in front of her. "This should fit. I'll have it on tomorrow."

"Thanks," I sputter before I exited her tent and went back to the shelter I shared with my dad and cousin. When I entered the tent both Ben and Dad started laughing.

"Did you really tell Mom to make sure she doesn't wear anything underneath?" Ben was cracking up.

I just scowled at the two.

"Think of it as payback for discussing my love life with my mother," Ben said with a feigned look of anger, but then started laughing again.

"At least you don't have to wear an itchy Wookiee suit," my dad pointed out as he pulled more hair out of the garment. "Why don't you guys go talk to some of the younger soldiers in camp. You may want to get in some military training in the future. Ask them what training they've done and what missions they have been on." When we didn't move my dad motioned with his head for us to go. "That's an order. Both of you."

Ben and I gave each other puzzled looks, but did as we were told. I have a feeling that Dad isn't telling us everything about this mission.


	8. Chapter 8

**_Entry 24_ **

We've been slowly traveling through the jungle in the pouring rain all morning. I hate being out in a deluge. On Coruscant the weather is controlled so we are never surprised by a storm. Once a month it would rain on the city world…mainly to clean off the dust and dirt deposited by vehicles or industry.

I have to admit the durawick coveralls do work. Despite the intense downpour and the constant sticky humidity my skin stayed dry. Dad said he wished he had this type of coverall when he went to Dagobah with Uncle Luke. He spent a week on the jungle world and he ended up with a wicked heat rash. He said couldn't wait to get back to civilization so he could put a specialized bacta salve on the infected area…which was everywhere his underwear touched. Ouch! He said it was like a million needles stabbing his groin. Double ouch!

I hope I don't ever to have to go to Dagobah. It doesn't sound like a fun place. Dad went there to train with Uncle Luke. This was shortly after I was born when Dad was just an apprentice. While on the planet Dad went into what he called the cave of evil...an underground cavern full of darkside energy. He was told Jedi going into the cave often had visions. Uncle Luke said the first time he was on the planet he had a vision of him killing Vader only to find out it was himself within the armor. Five years after Yoda died Uncle Luke returned and he saw a possible future where my Aunt Mara actually killed him while on Tatooine. Luckily that future did not come to pass.

My father went in and when he came out my Uncle Luke said he was shaken and pale…but my father refused to tell anyone what he saw. I asked him once but he wouldn't even tell me. Whatever it was it must have been awful. I have a feeling it might be something to do with him or his family…otherwise why wouldn't he tell Luke?

Anyway, getting back to my story. Dad said he was glad he had the coveralls even though the castoff Wookiee hair that remained in the outfit was making him itch. Dad said he hoped the Wookiee that last wore the outfit didn't have Wroshyr Lice.

Uncle Han once told us all about Wroshyr lice that are found on the Wookiee planet of Kashyyyk. He said that female Wookiees would drop a Wroshyr louse on a male she was interested in. She would then apologize for accidently (meaning on purpose) dropping a louse in his fur. She would then take the next hour to groom the male's fur to extract the louse. In other words, it was just a stupid excuse for the female to put her furry hands all over the male's body. The males don't seem to mind though.

I am so glad that humans don't have that custom. I could just see some lady infecting me with Kaon Crotch Crabs just so she would paw over my body. That wouldn't be fun…well, I guess it would depend on how hot looking the woman was. Ha!

Once again I am off topic. Our travels through the mucky jungle of Seylott was a pain in the butt. The vegetation was so thick that speeder bikes couldn't be used, so we had to walk. The troops would climb three steps up a muddy hill and then slip down two. Which wouldn't be too bad if the hillsides weren't covered with a strange, black barked tree that had spikes sticking out all along the trunk. The natural human response to sliding down a muddy hill is to grab onto something to slow your decent. Unfortunately, this tree—which I nicknamed 'Black Palm' because the black spikes usually ended up embedded in your palm—was always there when a trooper reached out to grab something. The Jedi didn't really have this problem keeping our balance, but the soldiers were slipping and sliding all over the place. We ended up using the Force to assist the soldiers up and down some of the rougher terrain.

After a while we could sense sentient beings in the distance, probably six kilometers away. They didn't feel completely human, but we knew we weren't sensing animals. We were fairly certain it a group of Seylott tribesmen, so we kept moving.

I got to meet my Master's tent-mate during the walk. It was the only other female in the group. Her name is Captain Lodi Nisda. She is a thirty-something human female with short-cropped hair and a stern look. I was told she works for GA Intelligence. That in itself wasn't odd—what was strange was my Aunt's behavior around her. Mara had suddenly become very outgoing and talkative with Captain Nisda. It's not that Mara Jade Skywalker wasn't friendly, but usually it took time for her to warm up to people.

The fact that she was acting all chummy indicated to me that she was trying to coax information out of the Captain. So now I have my Master and my father both acting a little strange. I wish they let me or Ben in on what's is going on. Both denied that they were acting weird, but I am pretty sure they are keeping something from us.

.

.

**_Entry 25: Seylott_ **

After sloshing through mud in the pouring rain for five hours we finally found a group of Seylott natives. They were impressive looking beings—tall and muscular with very long arms. Their necks were so thick and that they are often described as neck-less. They speak crude Basic, but it is understandable. It was determined that the mining companies did not get permission to set up operation in the area. In fact when the natives protested the company's appearance on their hunting grounds they were run off by the mining camp's security.

As soon as it was determined the miners did not have a legitimate claim, the GA Intelligence Captain appeared to be very anxious to get rid of us Jedi. She sent out a signal to the base camp and had a troop transport locate the closest clearing that could be used as a landing zone. We were thanked for our assistance and then we were quickly escorted to the LZ. From there we boarded a transport ship to be whisked back to the base camp and then to our shuttle.

It wasn't until we were away from the troopers that I asked my Master what was going on.

"Didn't you read the brief on the planet?" she asked.

"Yeah." Which was true.

"Did you bother researching what Phrik ore is used for?" my aunt asked.

I shook my head. My aunt looked at Ben. "How about you?"

"No," Ben admitted.

She gave us a severe look. "That is part of being a Jedi. You're not privates in the Army who simply have to show up to formation. You research your mission!"

My face burned from the rebuke. She was right, though. I just showed up and did what I was told. That's not really the mark of a true leader.

"Phrik is one of the few metals that is resistant to lightsabers," My father pointed out.

My Aunt Mara smirked. "We were requested to help find the Seylott people, but while we were in hyperspace that request was countermanded by GA Intelligence."

"We retrieved the message when we reverted to real space, but we pretended we didn't receive the second message," my father said. "We hoped we wouldn't be sent away. That would probably make what they were doing look suspicious. We wanted to see what was going on."

"What do you think the GA is doing?" I asked.

My Master shrugged. "Probably nothing nefarious. Phrik is one of the most resistant metals in the galaxy and would be useful in most military applications. They probably wanted to kick the civilian contractors out and nationalize the mines for the GA military."

"Or the anti-Jedi segments of the GA might want to stockpile the metal to make Jedi resistant armor or battle droids," my father continued.

Ben shook his head. "Why would they want to do that?"

Aunt Mara gave us an unsympathetic look. "Why would Palpatine want to purge the universe of thousands of Jedi?"

My father frowned sadly. "Sometimes Jedi just get in the way."

I can't imagine any scenario where the Galactic Alliance and the Jedi would be enemies, but maybe I just don't have a good enough imagination.

I felt a cold shiver run down my spine at the very thought. Hopefully, my dad and Master are just being paranoid, but now I understand why they wanted us to chat up the soldiers and why my aunt suddenly became gregarious. We were spying on the GA.

Interesting.

**_._ **

**_._ **

**_ENTRY 26_ **

Ben came over to my quarters yesterday to hang out. In a couple weeks he will be knighted. After that happens he knows he'll probably won't have the time to play holo games, watch holovids or go out to clubs like he could as an apprentice. Therefore, he's been taking advantage of any free time he has to relax with his friends.

He wanted to go out to a nightclub with me and my brother, but Jaden wasn't back from school yet. So we decided to kill some time until his return by watching a holodrama or mystery. Jaden and I pay to have streaming holovid programming in our room, so Ben and I were scrolling through the titles when one holofilm caught my eye.

" _Luke Skywalker and the Krayt Cult of Tatooine_?" I looked over to Ben. "Have you seen that one?"

He shook his head. "What year was it made?"

I checked the holo information for its release date. "1 ABY."

Ben snickered. "I bet this is one of those films that Uncle Han had a hand in making. Dad said a slew of badly made action holos came out after the Battle of Yavin. He eventually discovered Han and Chewie were making up completely false stories about him and selling the movie rights."

"Yeah, like _'Luke Skywalker and the Shadows of Mindor'_?"

"That holovid is based on true events. " He shook his head. "No, that one Uncle Han wasn't involved in. Mom and I watched it once. Mom then asked Dad, ' _Who's this Aeona Cantor woman?'_ "

I was puzzled. "Who was she?"

Ben shrugged. "Dad said it was the girlfriend of his friend Nick Rostu, but the writer who created the screenplay heavily hinted that she was in love with my dad."

I chuckled. "You know what they say, once you go Jedi you never go back."

Ben shook his head. "You do realize you're the only person who actually says that."

"I know," I said with a smirk. "Let's watch it. You have to admit it will be fun seeing how your dad was portrayed when he was young."

So that is what we did for the next two hours. Force! I don't think I have ever laughed so hard in my life. The holofilm starts and we see a man walking out of the desert. He was wearing the distinctive orange Rogue pilot flight suit. The camera zooms in and we can finally see the man clearly. He has some of the features of Uncle Luke; there is the cleft chin, blue eyes and badly cut blond hair…but that's about it. This guy was a monster of a man. He was over two meters tall with broad shoulders and huge biceps bulging under his uniform. If my dad didn't dye his hair and irises this is what I imagine he would look like.

I start cracking up. "Wow, your dad was really buff when he was younger!"

Ben grinned. "Yeah, Dad really let himself go since his rebellion days."

We could see the actor portraying Luke Skywalker walk into a small desert town.

"So why did your dad decide to park his X-Wing five kilometers out of town?"

He shrugged. "Dad always liked to saunter into towns sunburned and dehydrated."

I snickered. The Luke Skywalker actor goes into a tavern and orders a Rodian Ale which he swigs back in one gulp. I started dry gagging. Rodian Ale has a hideous taste and I was fairly sure the real Luke Skywalker would have spewed that drink halfway across the bar once that foul liquid hit his tongue. The man then had two shots of Vosh…which is a one hundred percent pure alcohol drink!

"Ben, your dad could really hold down his booze back then. Nowadays he gets tipsy with one ale with Uncle Han."

Ben was about to respond but then his eyes went wide as a half dressed blue Twi'lek came up to the performer and wrapped her arms around his neck. _"Are you Luke Skywalker?"_ the buxom twi'lek asked as she rubbed up against the actor. The Luke Skywalker character gave her a very uncharacteristic leer as he moved his hands down her body until they rested on her backside.

" _It depends."_ The large blond man responded. _"Who wants to know?"_

The sexy twi'lek tells him she was looking for somebody to help free her friends who were being held prisoner by members of the evil Krayt Cult—which is an actual group of people who worship Krayt dragons on Tatooine. The cult members had abducted the most beautiful women on Tatooine and were planning on sacrificing them to a Krayt Dragon.

Of course the holofilm Luke Skywalker agrees to help, but not before he goes back to the Twi'lek's room and has hot interspecies sex with her. I look over to Ben who has his hand covering his eyes and was turning red.

"Ben, he really isn't your Dad on screen…and you got to see this hot Twi'lek flesh."

"I love seeing hot Twi'lek flesh, but not when somebody who is supposed to be my father is currently on top of that flesh."

I laughed out loud at my cousin's discomfort. "At least they're not too explicit. I'm glad we didn't have to see your dad's _lightsaber_."

The rest of the movie was awful. Luke Skywalker fights off the cult members and then a krayt dragon and then he frees a dozen scantily clad Twi'lek women who suddenly decide the best way to thank their hero is by having group sex. At least that is what I assume. The holofilm mercifully pans away from the frenzied groping before things went too far along. As the credits rolled I gave Ben a wide smirk. "Wow Ben, your dad got a lot of Twi'lek action for a man with a horrible bowl haircut."

Ben snorted. "A bad haircut can't overcome the fact that all Skywalkers are extremely charming, debonair and have the classic hero good looks. Twi'leks fall for it every time."

"Oh yeah." My grin grew wider. "Are you still dating Niki?"

Ben blushed. "Sure, we go out as friends."

I scoffed. "Yeah, friends with benefits." I was surprised when Ben didn't make a snappy come back to that comment. "Are you guys getting serious?"

He shook his head. "No, we're just dating for fun. She wants to one day marry somebody of her own species and have kids of her own." He shrugged. "It wouldn't work anyway. She wants to return to Ryloth and start her own medical practice and I want to stay on Coruscant to be near my family." He hesitated for a moment. "Anyway, I would like to have kids one day also."

"Jaden told me he read about human/twi'lek hybrids."

Ben shook his head. "We're just having fun together. It's nothing serious. We're friends." He gave me a slight smile. "As for benefits… it's true. She does enjoy occasional benefits from me."

"She benefits from you?" I started laughing so hard I thought I would crack a rib. "You are so full of yourself!"

"Hey," he laughed. "It's not like this planet is crawling with the exotic redheaded freckled face men that she so desires."

I started laughing again. Ben can have a self-deprecating sense of humor sometimes.

Jaden came back from school an hour later and we decided to go out on the town. This time we didn't get in any trouble, which is amazing. A good time was had by all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author Note: The description of the Seylott people this post is canon and the Wookiee mating habits are also canon. I think they are both from the comics. The tree I described is not canon, but they have it in Panama and I slid into more than one of those miserable trees while training in that country.


	9. Chapter 9

**_ENTRY 27_ **

Today was really a bad and emotionally draining day. My feelings have alternated between shock, fear, sadness and determination.

First came the shock—my brother and I are asked to meet with Grand Master Luke. When we get there Ben is also there and looking pale. Uncle Luke told us to sit down.

"I am not sure what's going on," my uncle said, "but the local law enforcement precinct asked if you three would come down to the station to answer some questions." Uncle Luke looked at us expectantly, like would have some clue as to what was going on. "Any idea as to what they want? They wouldn't tell me."

We all shook our heads. The Grand Master gave us a grim look. "I have taken the liberty to procure a lawyer to accompany you… and I'm going with you."

We sat stunned and looked back and forth between each other. We had no inkling as to why the police would want to question us.

.

.

Then came fear—we get to the precinct and two police officers, one in his late fifties and the other in his thirties, came into a conference room where we were sitting. We have a Bothan lawyer with us along with the Grand Master. The police looked a little shocked at the amount of people there, but our lawyer said they couldn't question us alone if we requested a lawyer. Only Uncle Luke could be asked to leave.

The law enforcement officers simply shrugged their shoulders and sat down across the table for us.

"We are hoping you could help us on a criminal investigation." The older of the two policemen said. "We have reason to believe there is a Force-Strong male in the area committing sexual assaults on young women."

Frack! My heart started beating wildly right about now because **_I'M ALWAYS_** blamed for things I didn't do.

The younger policeman chimed in. "Last night at Coruscanti University a female student was accosted in her dorm room. She doesn't remember anything about the assault, but her boyfriend entered her room just as a man was attempting to undress her. The boyfriend fought with the man before he was forcefully shoved across the room by what he said was _'an unseen hand'._ He said it looked like some of the special effects seen in Jedi action holos."

Uncle Luke took on a frosty look. "I hope you are not suggesting it was any of my Jedi!" He looked at me, Ben and Jaden. "And I can guarantee these three young men would never be involved in something so reprehensible. I have known them since they were born!"

The older officer gave us a disarming smile. "They're here only as potential witnesses."

My uncle looked confused. "I'm sure if they witnessed a crime they would have reported it. Why _are_ they here exactly?"

"When the boyfriend bloodied the perpetrator's nose and we extracted DNA from the blood left at the crime scene. We ran the DNA through our databanks that included DNA from criminal and civil cases. We got a hit. It wasn't an exact match, but it was a familial hit from DNA collected from the Talon Tantiss vs Sara Katarka paternity case."

I was confused. "Familial hit? What's that? What does that mean?"

My brother turned to me. "It means one of the people providing DNA for your paternity case is related to the perpetrator."

A sick feeling came over me. Ben, Jaden and I gave DNA samples. Other than Jaden, the only male relative I have that is Force-sensitive is my father. My uncle Shon and Jaycen and their kids don't have any Force sensitivity. On Ben's side of his family he has his father and his twin brothers. I know the twins are strange, but they would never do something so despicable.

All this went through my mind in the few seconds before the officer clarified the situation. "The DNA familial hit came from Sara Katarka's unborn child."

.

.

And then there was sadness. "Sara was a victim of this creep?" I asked. Now I _really_ felt bad for her.

The older officer nodded. "We believe so. We don't know if there are only two victims or multiple victims. This second woman doesn't remember this man entering her apartment or the confrontation between them. She remembers entering her apartment and then seeing her boyfriend fighting with a man."

"He's doing a memory rub," Luke said ominously. As soon as the words were out of his mouth I realized why Sara was so adamant that I had to be the father. She _REALLY_ didn't remember having sex with anyone. If the night we met was the only time she was drunk…then she would have every reason to believe she was impregnated that night.

The two officers focused their attention on my uncle. "A memory rub? So they don't remember? Is that common knowledge with Jedi?"

My uncle shook his head. "No, I don't teach the technique. It can be done by a Jedi, but it is considered a darkside technique." My uncle looked up at the officers. "You see the darkside…"

The officers raised their hands. "I think we've seen enough Jedi action holos to understand the basics."

"Yeah, I loved _Shadow's of Mindor_ ," the younger man said with a smile.

My uncle closed his eyes and groaned. He hates all the Luke Skywalker holofilms.

"Or _The Taming of the Jedi_ ," the older man said with a leer.

Despite the seriousness of the situation, I had to bite my lower lip to keep from laughing. I've never seen it, but I have heard of that particular film. It was a Luke/Mara domination skinholo. Ben must have heard of that porno because he started coughing in an attempt to disguise a laugh.

Uncle Luke turned bright red. "Can we please get back on topic?" His words came out through clenched teeth.

"Sorry," the senior officer said with a sheepish look. "I know you don't believe the criminal is one of your Jedi…but I need to know, do any of your Jedi know this technique? Perhaps they learned it somewhere else?"

My uncle's eyes narrowed. "There are a couple Jedi that have knowledge from another…source. Did the boyfriend give you a description of the man?"

One officer read from a notebook. "Average height between 1.7 to 1.8 meters tall, brown hair, clean shaven, probably in his late twenties."

I could see my uncle let out a breath of relief. "The men that might know the technique don't fit the description. One is 2.1 meters with red hair and beard. The other has a shock of white hair and is taller." He looked over to the police officers. "You have our full cooperation. I am certain this criminal is not a Jedi."

"We don't think so either." The officer smiled at Luke. "Like I said, your Jedi are here because they might be potential witnesses." He turned to us. "Did any of you notice anybody watching or stalking Sara Katarka the night you accompanied her home to her dorm?"

I shook my head. "There were two sleemo guys at the club that tried to fight us over the ladies, but they weren't Force-sensitive."

"How do you know that?"

I looked over to Ben nervously. I don't know if he wants his father to know he used a Jedi mind trick to get rid of these guys.

"I used a Force suggestion to make them leave," Ben volunteered the information.

The officers looked at each other. "So you can suggest something to someone and they do it?"

"If they are weak willed," Uncle Luke clarified.

The younger officer started taking notes. "So a Force-sensitive could have knocked on the second victim's door and simply said, _'let me in'_ and she might have let him in without a fight?"

"Yes," Uncle Luke admitted.

"So if one of us catches this guy he might say, 'let me go' and we might do just that?"

Luke nodded. "It's possible."

The older officer sighed. "Master Skywalker. I think we need to bring some Jedi in to help us then."

.

.

And that brings me to the feeling of determination. I want to help! I want justice for Sara and the other victim. I immediately volunteered my assistance. Ben and Jaden quickly offered up their help also.

We talked to the officer for a while about a plan. It was determined that a couple Jedi females might act as decoys. Jaina's name was immediately brought up. We couldn't decide on the second Jedi at that time. When we left the station we had a plan of action. I want to get this guy!

.

.

**_Entry 28 - Coruscant_ **

This was an exciting week. I sort of like doing undercover work.

Since the two known attacks happened in the Coruscanti University dormitories the police decided to do surveillance in those areas. The University had a few empty rooms and a team of Jedi was assigned quarters. We would go undercover as college students. This wasn't a stretch for Jaden since he already was in college there. He was able to show us around. The school had their maintenance personnel place surveillance holocams in the hallways and lobbies of all dormitories and there were roaming surveillance hoverdroids patrolling the campus.

Jaina and Jysella were picked to be the female decoys and they were set up in a room together. There was holocameras in their room, but they had an override button for privacy when they were dressing. All the other cameras were in public areas.

Jaden, Ben and I were down the hall in a four-man room. Inside there was an array of monitors set up to watch what the surveillance cameras were recording. There was a fourth man in our group named Erek Gowen. Erek was a Coruscanti law enforcement officer assigned to make the official arrest. He was a light skinned human with brown hair and eyes and a baby face that made him look much younger than the twenty-eight years he claimed was his age.

He was a nice enough guy, but he had an insatiable curiosity about the Jedi…especially when he was bored. And I soon discovered that surveillance, although it sounds exciting, can be mind numbingly boring when nothing is happening.

One night we were sitting around the monitors watching the students come and go on campus when Erek decided to bombard us with questions.

"Can you guys read my mind?" he asked us one night.

"Sure," I replied.

His eyes went wide. "Really?"

"Of course," I said with a grin. "You were thinking you wished you didn't have to be stuck with us boring Jedi but instead were hitting up on some of those hot co-eds." I pointed to a group of well-endowed human females walking across the viewing screen.

His eyes went wider. "Damn, you can read minds!"

Jaden smacked me on the shoulder. "He can't read your mind, Erek. He was just telling you what he was thinking."

"Oh," Erek said with a laugh. "Can you turn invisible?"

"We three can't…yet, but it _is_ possible," Ben offered. "I've read about it, but you'd probably have to be a Jedi Master that trained on the technique for years. It is a rare ability. It is much easier to get sentient beings to not pay attention to us. We can distract them."

"We can also use the Force to mess with the electronics of holocams," Jaden told the man. "So if our perpetrator is a Force user, he might be doing that. Take notice if cameras start getting filled with static."

"Will do," he said with a nod. "Can you see the future?"

We all shrugged. "We are taught that the future is always in motion," Ben explained. "It is not fixed. Therefore if we have visions it may be the future or a possible future. We can never know for sure…that's probably why none of us are financial investors."

Erek grinned. "I saw this skinholo where a Jedi used the Force to enhance sex, is that possible."

"Yes," all three of us Jedi answered simultaneously.

I started chuckling. "Ben, I'm surprised. I thought you were taught not to use the Force on trivialities."

Ben gave me an incredulous look. "Since when is sex trivial?"

"Good point," I conceded.

"What's it like?" Erek asked.

"I'd rather not say," Ben said as he pointed to me. "Talon here has a habit of repeating things I say to his Master…which is my mother."

"Did any of you go out with that hot Jaina Solo Jedi?" Erek asked obviously not knowing or remembering that other than Jsyella we were all related.

"No!" Ben said harshly. "She's our cousin!" He pointed to Jaden and me. "The Solo, Skywalker and Tantiss families are all related to each other."

Erek looked at each of us. There was Ben with red hair and freckles, Jaden with a dark complexion, hair and eyes and me with blond hair and blue eyes. We couldn't look more dissimilar from each other. "I wouldn't have guessed. You all look so different." He scratched the side of his head. "Yeah, I forgot that Skywalker and Organa-Solo are brother and sister." He looked over to me. "How is your family related?"

I gave him the false story we have been telling people for two decades. "Our father is the brother to Mara Jade Skywalker."

It was a believable story. Dad dyes his hair the same color as Mara's and he has the same color eyes…also dyed. Aunt Mara has no recorded documents about her past and neither does my father, since Luke found him in a cloning facility. So there is no datapad trail that could disprove the tale.

"Oh," Erek said then paused for a moment in thought. "So have you guys been with just Force users or regular women?"

"Both," my brother said which surprised me. I didn't know he dated any of the female Jedi.

"Which is better?" Erek asked.

"You get in a lot less trouble with non-Force users," I said. "They can't figure out you're lying when you tell them that you love that hideous dress they're wearing…and _no_ , it doesn't make their butt look fat."

"I agree." Ben laughed. "I know my dad often gets in trouble with mom when he tries to get one over on her."

"I prefer dating Jedi," Jaden said. "I like a relationship on an equal footing."

I gave him a sly look. "And which female Jedi are you dating?"

He shook his head. "I am not dating any at the moment. Before I started college I spent time with a few Jedi ladies…they're all Knights now and off on missions."

"Older women! You were dating older female Jedi?" Now I was really intrigued.

My brother shrugged. "They were only a couple years older." He shook his head. "I'm not going to discuss this further."

"Come on!" Ben begged for more details. "You can't leave us hanging like this!"

My brother blushed but relented. "I guess it wasn't a secret. I've dated Tia Kai and Karana Sirja."

My jaw dropped. "The Dathomirian witches?" I put my hands out in front of my chest about fifteen centimeters. "You mean Tia, the lady with the great pair of…"

"Hey!" my brother interrupted me. "Don't be disrespectful. They were both nice women."

"I'll bet," I had to say with a smirk. "Did they claim you as a mate, toss you onto the bed, and take turns ravishing you like true Dathomirians?"

"I didn't date them at the same time!" My brother said hotly. He hesitated for a moment before he continued. "But yes, they were a bit aggressive."

"HA!" Ben let out a loud laugh.

"Okay, no more talk about my love life." He gestured to Erek. "Next question."

"Can I see one of you levitate something?" Erek said after a moment of thought.

Ben rolled his eyes. That is one of those questions we hear all the time. "We're not circus entertainers."

Erek looked a little disappointed. "It's just boring watching these screens. We have been looking for the bad guy for three days with no hits."

"Fine," Ben said as he pointed to a bag of snack chips on the desk and made it levitate off the table."

"Boring," I said then reached out with the Force and forcefully pulled up the back of Erek's elastic underwear waistband. The man gave out a surprised shout and then glared at me.

"Did you do that?" he asked angrily as he tried to rearrange his underwear in a less painful position. "Stang, what are they teaching you at the Temple?"

Jaden punched me in the arm again. "They're not teaching us that." He laughed. "I taught him that…the hard way. I have to admit, I used to pull that prank on my brother…a lot."

Erek gave up trying to rearrange his underwear through his pants and instead opted to use the 'fresher for some privacy. "I'm glad my brother didn't have the Force."

When he came back he looked at his wristchrono. "Why don't we try something different?" He pulled out his datapad and typed in a few notes. "Why don't two of you go out with the Jedi females for a while? Then bring them back and have them act like they're drunk and leave them in their room. Maybe that will get the perpetrator to take notice.

We all shrugged our shoulders. "Sounds good. Who wants to go?"

"You guys can go," Ben offered. "I'll stay here with the monitors."

So Jaden and I called on our comlink to Jaina and Jysella telling them our plan, we met and decided to go to a local pub…and that is when the night became interesting.

I will write more later on about what happened.


	10. Chapter 10

**_Entry 29_ **

Okay, this is what happened that night.

The four of us went to a local club. We ordered non-alcoholic versions of some of the mixed drinks at the bar and made a show of being tipsy. We then started back to the dorms. As we drew near the building Jysella must have decided she wanted to pursue an acting career because she was really getting into her 'drunk girl' persona.

She leaned on Jaden and sometimes pretended to stumble so she could grab hold of my brother and hug his waist. She looked up to him and grinned. "You are so sexy," she slurred.

They were walking ahead of me and Jaina, so I had a great view of Jaden's startled jump when Jysella grabbed his buttocks and squeezed. I looked over to Jaina as she chuckled at my brother's discomfort. She was walking next to me pretending to be slightly unsteady on her feet. I looked back to my brother and Jysella and noticed they had stopped. Jysella had both her arms around Jaden's neck and gave him an evil grin. "How about a kiss, my stud muffin?"

"I don't think that's a good…" That is all Jaden got out before Jysella pressed a firm kiss against his lips. The shock that radiated off my brother was laughable.

Jaina and I stopped to watch my frantic brother trying to peel Jysella off him. I am sure he didn't like the idea of Jysella's Jedi father, Corran Horn, running him through with his lightsaber after hearing about this...but this did confirm my long time suspicion that Jysella had a schoolgirl crush on my brother.

Jaina gave an amused snort. "Your brother better watch out, Jysella is jailbait." Meaning my nineteen-year-old brother could be thrown in jail for contributing to the delinquency of a seventeen-year-old minor.

I shook my head. "That's not true. Although the drinking age on Coruscant is eighteen the legal age of consent is actually sixteen."

I always thought it was odd that you couldn't drink until you are eighteen, but you could have sex at sixteen. Maybe the authorities didn't want teenagers to have drunken sex until they were adults…but sober sex was fine.

Jaina gave me a disgusted look. "I can't believe you have that little tidbit of information committed to memory." She shook her head. "And here I was thinking that your bad reputation was the creation of the sleemo media."

"It is a creation of the media." I gave my cousin my most innocent look. "I'll have you know it was your brother who informed me of that particular law."

She looked at me perplexed. "Jacen?"

I laughed. "No, Anakin."

It looked like Jaina was going to question me further but then she gave me an understanding nod and a roll of her eyes. Anakin started hanging out with his future wife when he was sixteen and she was thirteen. He probably looked up that information to stay out of trouble. That would probably explain why he looked so happy during Tahiri's sixteenth birthday party. Ha! I bet he had a special package for Tahiri to unwrap that night. I'm kidding, I'm sure Tahiri was a nineteen-year-old virgin bride after dating Anakin for six years. Ha! Yeah, sure.

I looked back just as Jaden managed to untangle himself from Jysella and started walking back to the dorm without her. "Oh come on Jaden, don't be that way. I'm too drunk to walk on my own," Jysella laughed with a fake slur.

Jaden stopped, shook his head in frustration, and then returned to Jysella.

"No funny business," he warned her.

"I wouldn't think about it," she said with a devious smile and then returned to holding and leaning into him.

Yep…I am one hundred percent positive that young Jysella has a thing for my brother. It's too bad that he's attracted to older women. Older, wild women if the things he said earlier were true. I have a hard time imagining my shy brother taking on a Dathomir witch, but then I never imagined he could kriff-dance like he did in that club that night during the Fashinfest. Jaden is full of surprises.

We were walking into the dorm when Jaina grabbed a hold of my arm and leaned toward me. For a horrifying second, I thought she was going to pull a Jysella on me…a disturbing thought when you consider she's my cousin. Fortunately she simply wanted to talk to me unheard. "Do you feel something in the Force?" she asked me.

I spread out my senses and I did feel something. I felt watched. "Somebody is watching?"

"Yes," Jaina said. "We've attracted somebody's attention."

I nodded as we moved inside the dorm. "What do you want us to do?" Jaina was the ranking Jedi on this mission and was calling the shots when it came to us… even though Erek thought he was in charge.

"Drop us off as planned, but keep a visual on the monitors and keep in constant audio contact."

I nodded as we got to their room. We said our goodbyes and went back up to our room and waited for the perpetrator to strike. We waited and waited and waited.

"Jaina and I were sure somebody was watching us," I said while getting bored.

"Maybe he's waiting to get a woman alone," Erek ventured.

"That's possible." Ben got on his comlink. "Jaina…maybe we should pull out Jysella and give him a lone target…what do you think?"

"Sounds good. Somebody come down and get her. I don't want the bad guy trying to grab her. I want to be the bait."

"Will do," Ben said. He then turned to Jaden. "You want to go down and get your girlfriend?"

He frowned. "I don't have a thing for Jysella."

Ben smiled. "Maybe, but I saw on the monitors how she was hanging all over you. Therefore it wouldn't seem odd if you are the one who goes down to get her."

Jaden groaned but went down to pick up Jysella. After a few minutes he returned with the grinning seventeen-year-old. I know this isn't Jysella's first mission, therefore I think her exuberance over this assignment had something to do with working with Jaden.

We watched the monitors for another half hour before we saw a man fitting the perpetrator's description entering the dormitory hallway.

"Jaina," Ben called on his comlink. "We have movement. We'll wait for your signal."

"Okay, I'll leave the comlink mic open." Jaina responded and we saw her put the comlink down on a desk.

We watched the monitors as the man came up to Jaina's door and stood outside for a moment with an intense look of concentration on his face. I am pretty sure he was using the Force to figure out who was inside the room. After a moment he pushed the door activation panel, which Jaina purposely left unlocked. He quickly entered the room as soon as the door cycled open.

"Who are you? What are you doing here!" we heard Jaina call out doing her best to sound distressed.

"Calm down," the man said. "You will be silent and do as I say."

Jaina gave him a confused look and ran a hand through her hair…which was our signal that he was attempting to use the Force to subdue her. Of course he would have to be a powerfully trained Jedi to affect Jaina.

"That's the signal," Ben said as we all stood. He looked at Erek. "We'll subdue him and you will make the official arrest." He pulled out his lightsaber. "Talon and I will go in first. Jysella and Jaden will be our back up. Erek coordinate with the police and have an air ambulance standing by."

"And air ambulance?" Erek looked concerned. "Do you think Jaina could be in danger?"

Ben laughed as we exited the dorm room. "No, the suspect is the one who's in danger."

We ran down the hall until we got to the room. We pressed the door panel and rushed in, lightsabers blazing, surprising the criminal. He quickly pulled a vibroblade out of his pocket and grabbed Jaina putting the blade under her neck. "Don't move! Or I'll kill her."

We paused for a second, not because we were worried, but we didn't know if Jaina wanted to handle this guy by herself or not. The fact that she let him grab her told us she wanted to take the time to make sure he had enough crimes committed and recorded on holocams to convict him before she went into action.

Jaina looked at us pretending to be scared. "Please, listen to him."

I looked over to Ben who shut off his saber. I followed suit. Jaden and Jysella were still in the hallway and hadn't activated their sabers yet.

The man gave a smug look. He pulled Jaina a little closer to him, his blade still hovering under her chin. "If anybody tries to stop me, this kriff'n _rot'slot_ will die!"

My jaw dropped and I could feel shock radiate from all the Jedi…and not because we were concerned for Jaina's safety. We were shocked that he used the term _rot'slot_. That is one of those forbidden words that should _never_ be said to a woman. That expletive was one of the seven words banned on the holonet. If you wanted to call a woman something that would guarantee to infuriate her… _rot'slot_ was the word. All men in the galaxy know you don't say that word unless you never, ever want to get laid again! And your involuntary celibacy would not be restricted to the woman you insulted because I guarantee the offended lady will angrily tell _all_ her female friends who will get onto the holonet social media to spread the news and before you know it you are totally unkriffable.

Oh boy. This stupid di'kut just ordered up a large order of kick ass and Jaina was ready to dish it out.

"Okay," Ben said holding up his hands in a placating gesture. "Don't do anything crazy."

A feeling of nervous anticipation suddenly came over me. The perpetrator must have sensed my unease causing him to smirk. It's too bad that he didn't realize I was worried about what Jaina was about to do to him. Although she is Force shielding I can see in her eyes she was about to strike.

He gestured at us with the vibroblade, foolishly taking it away from Jaina's neck. "You two get out of…" That was all he got out before Jaina struck with the speed of a Corellian sand panther. She took a slight step to the right and then brought a powerful hammer fist strike down into the man's groin.

Ben and I both flinched and unconsciously brought a hand over our groins in an almost sympathetic gesture. As the man screamed Jaina ducked under his upraised arm holding the vibroblade and positioned herself so his arm was now perched over her left shoulder. She then reached up and grabbed the man's wrist and turned it ever so slightly so his elbow was now resting on her shoulder. She then forcefully pulled down his arm using her shoulder as a fulcrum until his elbow bent in a direction that it was never intended to bend.

The man screamed again and the vibroblade clattered to the ground. She kicked it away as she spun to the right bringing her elbow crashing into the right side of his face. Blood, and I think a tooth, splattered against a far wall. Jaina completed her spin until she was behind the man and facing the same direction. She then did a leg sweep bringing the injured culprit crashing to the ground.

This all happened in less than a second or two, but my mind was racing so fast that it appeared to happen in slow motion. Jaina put a knee on the man's back and held his head down with a hand. She then looked up at us and raised an eyebrow. "Well…is anybody going to cuff this sleemo?"

"Erek," Ben called out. "All clear."

Erek rushed in with his stun cuffs as Jaina moved back to let the law enforcement officer work. He cuffed the man's left hand behind his back but when he reached for the intruder's right hand he hesitated when he saw it bent in a completely unnatural manner. "Stang!" he muttered hesitant to touch such a gruesomely twisted limb.

"For Sithsake," Jaina swore as she bent down and grabbed the man's right hand and wrestled it back so Erek could slap the other cuff on his wrist. The perpetrator screamed at the movement of his broken arm… and for a second I almost felt sorry for him…almost. He shouldn't have been sexually assaulting women, or trying to take Jaina hostage and he definitely shouldn't have used the R-word when referring to the second best female Jedi in the order (My Master being the best) and probably the third best Jedi warrior overall after Luke and Mara.

Erek pulled the man to his feet and looked at us. "I need somebody to accompany us to the hospital. I don't need him to pull a Jedi mind trick on me or the ambulance driver."

"I'll go," said Jaina, which caused the suspect's eyes to go wide and he started freaking out and begging Erek to keep that ' _psycho rot'slot away from him'_. Erek grabbed the man's injured arm and jerked him around so he was facing the officer. The man screamed at the movement.

"Don't you ever use that word again!" Erek snarled. He didn't clarify what he would do if the man did repeat the word, but a threat was implied. Erek looked at Jaina and gave her a flirtatious smile. "I'm sorry about my prisoner's manners Jedi Solo."

I was shocked when Jaina didn't roll her eyes at the officer's obvious interest…instead she smiled. "Thank you."

Ha! Now I think I know why Erek was so interested in knowing more about the Jedi…he had his eye on Jaina. I guess he would like to see what Force enhanced sex is. Ha ha! Good Luck buddy. Jaina likes pilots.

Erek looked at us. "I need a volunteer to go with me."

"I'll go," Jaden said. "I suspect that Jaina, Talon and Ben will have to go to the station to give their statements."

"I'll go with you Jaden," Jysella offered. I thought Jaden was going to say no, but he simply nodded.

We did have to go down to the station. There we spent four hours filling out long, detailed reports and giving a full account as to what happened. I couldn't help but feel good about taking a criminal off the streets. Hopefully he will be convicted and I will find some justice for Sara.

We still don't know who this guy is. He refused to talk to the police. I didn't recognize the criminal…and since I grew up at the Temple I was positive this wasn't a knight or ex-knight/Apprentice. That was a relief. We didn't need anybody sullying the reputation of the Jedi…well, any more than I do.

It would be interesting to know where this guy learned to do a mind rub and mind tricks. It is possible it is a self-taught talent. If so, it's a great waste of potential. He might have become a Jedi Knight if he didn't decide on a life of crime.

Uncle Luke is working with the police to ensure this guy doesn't escape. I think he is recommending stuncuffs and sentry droid guards.

.

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**_Entry 30_ **

The creep we caught is being held in the securest wing of the Armand Isard Correctional Facility. He still refuses to talk, but his DNA was taken and is being run through the Galactic Alliance DNA Database or GADNAD as it is usually referred to. Three more assault cases were discovered including one more pregnancy. This guy could have kids all over the galaxy.

I was told the trial probably wouldn't happen for months while the prosecutors put their case together. I may be called in to testify.

Shortly after this sleemo's capture Ben was officially knighted. It was done at the temple in the Hall of Knighthood. The Grand Master and most of the Jedi Council members were part of the ceremony while others (Jedi, apprentices, friends and family) watched.

I don't remember everything that Grand Master Skywalker said during the ceremony, but I do remember him saying he was very proud of his son. At that point I saw my Aunt Mara wipe her eyes and I realized she was crying. My mother was sitting next to me and she's all teary eyed. I have no idea why women cry at happy events.

I do remember one quote that Uncle Luke said that stuck with me. "The power of a lightsaber may win the battle, but wars are won by spiritual power and that power is derived from the Force. May the Force be with you."

After that was said Ben's Master, who happened to be my father, came up and pinned on the emblem of a Jedi Sentinel. That is the Jedi specialty that Ben decided on. He will do further training for that field. After he pinned on the crest I saw my father wipe his eyes. Stang he's all choked up also. I guess that is expected. Ben was Dad's first and only apprentice. Ben had been training with him for over a decade.

Ben chose to be a sentinel because it is a Jedi profession that lies somewhere between a Jedi Guardian (like my Dad) and a Jedi Consular. Sentinels are skilled fighters but they also specialize in slicing, demolitions, stealth and security. They can work as Jedi investigators and aid local law enforcement. Ben said he is going to attend university for a criminal Justice degree and then he will spend another sixteen weeks enrolled in the Galactic Alliance Law Enforcement Academy. This academy trains individuals to work within the Interplanetary Criminal Police Organization or IPCPO.

I think it is an interesting field. I think my Dad would want me to be a Jedi Guardian, but pilot or sentinel appeal to me also. But that might be because I screwed up my first traditional Jedi Guardian mission, but my last two successful Jedi operations were more suited to a Sentinel. I am still finishing my secondary school studies so I have some time to think about this.


	11. Chapter 11

**_Entry 31_ **

Dad found out that the _Wild Karrde_ was in orbit over Coruscant. That's the name of the ship owned by Talon Karrde, a former smuggler and now legitimate trader. He is also the man I'm named after. Shortly after my father was discovered on Wayland he was asked by Uncle Luke to train as a Jedi, but my father refused and instead took a job with Talon Karrde. My Aunt Mara was also employed by Karrde and I think my father wanted to stay near her. He said she was like a sister to him and he didn't want to lose what little family he had. He worked as a trader only a few months before the return of the Emperor Reborn. After his run in with the Emperor everything changed and both my dad and Aunt Mara decided to train as Jedi.

Some of my dad's best friends were crew members on the _Wild Karrde._ There was Talon, Chin, Aves and of course Mara when she had worked on the ship. So whenever the ship is nearby my father takes the opportunity to visit. This time he decided to drag me along.

We took Dad's shuttled and docked with the _Wild Karrde_. As we exit the docking ring Talon Karrde was there to greet us.

"Mark, it's good to see you again," Karrde said as he gave my father a hug and a slap on the back. He then turned to me. "And how is my namesake?" He gave me a broad smile and pulled me into a quick hug.

"I'm fine." I said as we parted.

Karrde ran a hand over his beard as he regarded me with a smirk. "I heard you are still getting in trouble."

I shrugged. "I am a victim of circumstances."

Karrde laughed and gave me a light slap on the back. "I'm sure that's it."

We were walking through the cargo area of the ship heading towards the crew quarters when I heard a loud menacing growl. I stop and look at Karrde.

He waved his hand in a dismissive gesture. "That's just my new vornskr pup. Don't worry she's tamed…just don't make any sudden movements until she gets a chance to check you out."

Karrde opened the door to the crew quarters and suddenly I was confronted with Karrde's so called 'pup'. The vornskr may be a juvenile, but she is still huge with a mouth full of large sharp teeth. The creature bounded up to me like she is going to attack. I was trying to decide what to do when I heard Karrde whisper, "Just be still."

I took a deep breath and braced for impact…but I was surprised when the animal halted at my feet. The dark brown canine-like animal circled me while sniffing my trousers. She came around and smelled my boots for a few seconds when, to my horror, she shoved her muzzle into my crotch.

"Ahhh!" I gasped nervously. I know animals often do this to get your scent, but I really don't like rows of razor sharp teeth positioned a few millimeters from my most treasured assets.

"Princess!" I heard a female voice call out. "Get away from that thing…you don't know where it's been!"

The Vornskr turned around and went to the owner of the voice. I looked up and saw Talon Karrde's youngest daughter Zylie smirking at me.

I let out a relieved breath and then glared at girl. "That's not funny, Zylie."

She gave me a sardonic laugh. "I think it's funny, very funny." She bent down and ran her hands over the vornskr's coarse fur. "You don't want to bite him, Princess, you might catch some disease."

"Sorry Talon," Karrde said with an apologetic look. "She just turned thirteen and you know how teenagers are."

My dad laughed. "I hope you have better luck with your teenagers than I'm having with mine."

Zylie and her pet went down the corridor ahead of us. I turned to Karrde. "Who names a vicious animal 'Princess'?"

"A thirteen year old girl, that's who." Karrde laughed. "Zylie named her."

I rolled my eyes. "It figures."

Dad and Karrde go off to talk and reminisce about their old adventures leaving me with Zylie and an ill tempered Vornskr. We walked into the dining area of the ship and sat down.

"So," I said trying to break the awkward silence between us. "Is your sister Valla around?"

Zylies eyes narrowed. "No, she is planet side with Mom." She gave me a suspicious look. "You better not let my dad catch you sniffing around Valla. He knows your reputation. You don't want to get my dad angry." She raised an eyebrow. "You do know that Dad is good at killing Force-users."

I gave a snort. "Yes Zylie, I know how your dad took down the Emperor Reborn…with my dad's help."

"He also captured your Grand Master," she said smugly.

I laugh. "Zylie, I know your dad's a great man…why do you think I was named after him."

"I still can't believe someone like you was named after my father," she said scornfully.

"What's wrong with me Zylie?" I asked her. "I just helped out in a criminal investigation. I got some scumbag off the streets."

She humphed. "I saw that on the news. I guess that is sorta cool," she reluctantly admitted. "Did you beat him up?"

I shook my head. "No, Jaina took him down."

She grinned. "That's even cooler. Talon Tantiss needs a girl to fight his battles."

I shrugged. "When the girl is Jaina Solo…it's nothing to be embarrassed about. She is one of the best. And she's a full Knight, I'm just an apprentice."

Zylie nodded and then looked directly at me, scrutinizing my face. Her expression scrunched up in amusement. "What's that under your nose?" She laughed again. "Are you trying to grow a mustache?"

I reach up and touch my upper lip to feel the sparse facial hair. "Maybe." Shavit, I was hoping she wouldn't notice. A few days ago I started wondering if I would look better with a beard like my father…so I stopped shaving.

She laughed. "Why bother? Your skin and facial hair are the same color."

Okay, this kid is getting on my nerve. She's so irritating. "I just started growing it. Give it time and I will have an awesome beard and mustache like my dad. You'll notice it then."

She started laughing. "Hi, I'm Talon Tantiss. I may not look like much now, but I'm drinking blue milk and I will soon grow big and strong with face-fur to impress the girls," she said doing her best impersonation of a holonet commercial for the Blue Milk Processing Association.

"Knock it off, Zylie."

She smirked. "So are you going to take on the Jedi-cool swaggerific look like Kyp Durron? You know, black cape, long hair, tight straight leg black pants, large leather cod piece and a pathetic attempt at a mustache that makes it look like he's got mange?"

"No," I protested. "When did you see Kyp?"

"Dad gave him a ride to Taris for some mission." She rolled her eyes. "Gods, he was hitting up on Valla all during the trip. Gross! I mean he is so old! He has to be…like forty. I bet he struts around the Temple winking at the girls and telling them they are totally _'wizard'_."

I couldn't help but laugh. "The only person I've ever heard say 'wizard' was Streen." This conversation was getting boring, so I stood and prepared to leave. "Well Zylie, I could spend all day talking to you, but I'm not. I think I'll go talk to Chin or Aves or anybody but you."

"Whatever." She said with typical young teen attitude. I got up and left her behind. Stang she's annoying.

I found Chin and we sat around his room watching holos. I wonder if my dad knows about Chin's impressive skinholo collection. I just saw the titles…and yes he does have _The Taming of the Jedi_. That is sort of creepy since everybody knows that movie is suppose to represent Uncle Luke and Aunt Mara. Changing the names to Lucky Skyrunner and Mari Sapphire didn't fool anybody. Ha! I didn't dare watch any though…not that I would want to. That would be a bit unsettling. Also, my father would have a fit if he caught me watching an adult holo. Instead we watched a horror flick about Rakghouls.

I'll take a Rakghoul over Zylie Karrde anyday.

.

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**_Entry 32_ **

I found out that Tahiri is pregnant. Anakin shoots, he scores. I can't believe he is going to have a kid already. He is only four-and-a-half years older than me and he has a wife and kid on the way. All I can say is…better him than me. HA! I am in no hurry to get tied down.

**_Entry 33_ **

Oh boy, was my mother irritated this afternoon. I knew she had the day off from the restaurant today, so I decided to stop by and see if she was making anything good for lunch. I hate eating in the Temple dining hall. The food is not that great. So I stopped over to my parents' quarters to try to scrounge up a real meal.

When I walked in their apartment I could feel my mother's jumbled emotions through the Force. I walk over to the kitchen and she is opening and closing the cabinets a little too forcefully.

"What's wrong Mom?"

She looked up at me and I could see her jaw tighten. "Nothing."

I groaned. I was told by my father that when a woman says nothing is wrong that means something is very, very wrong.

"What did dad do?" I asked her knowingly. My father probably bought another speeder bike.

She shook her head. "Your dad didn't do anything. I am a little irritated with some of the Jedi at this temple."

My brow shot up. Other than the Skywalkers and Horns Mom doesn't socialize much with the Temple Jedi. "What happened?"

My mom put some food in the oven and then wiped her hands with a kitchen cloth. She sighed and then motioned me to sit with her at the dining table.

"I went to watch your dad and Ben spar today in the gym." She took a deep breath and then continued. "I was sitting in the bleachers behind two female Jedi about your age."

"And?" I asked when she took a long pause.

"Ben and your Dad were sparring, jumping around and doing flips…it was very impressive." She drummed her fingers on the table in irritation. "Anyway these two females were ewwwing and ahhhing at the remarkable performance. Then one girl said ' _You're right, he is hot looking and I don't even like redheads._ '"

Mom stopped and smiled. "I thought it was cute that Ben had some lady admirers. The other girl said, _'You should see him shirtless in the gym. He's really muscular_ ', then the other Jedi said, _'And he is so big'._ She then giggled and said, _'I wonder if everything is proportionally as huge'."_

My jaw dropped. I am not surprised that female Jedi have a thing for Ben. Despite me kidding him about being a freckled-faced redhead, there are actually a lot of ladies that find him attractive…especially among the female Jedi apprentices. He has the facial features of his dad, but he is much taller than his father and he is by far more muscular. That is the result of being a gym regular and training with my dad for ten years. No, that wasn't a surprise. What got my jaw dropping was my mother actually was telling me these girls were trying to figure out the proportions of Ben's…package.

Before I could tell my mom that I'd rather not discuss this subject she continued her story. "I was shocked that they would be so…forward." She shook her head and rolled her eyes. "But then the other female said something more shocking." Mom turned to me and her eyes narrowed. "The other girl said, _'I looked up his name on the HoloNet and I found out that Tantiss is the name of a mountain."_

I made an audible gasp and then bit my lower lip and tried not to laugh. These girls were talking about my dad! I hate to admit it, but this is also not a huge surprise. Although he is what I considered ' _older than dirt'_ , for some reason the lady Jedi apprentices are attracted to the Masters. It's a prestige thing I think.

My mother scowled at me. "It's not funny. The other girl said, _'That's one mountain I wouldn't mind climbing'._ " My mother made a huffing noise. "I was about to say something but the other girl said, ' _Don't waste your time. He's married. Jedi Okea once tried to proposition him and he laughed in her face'._ Then the other girl said, ' _Wasn't Jedi Okea transferred last year to the Jedi sub-temple on Ossus?'_ " My mother glared at me. "Did you know about that?"

I shook my head. "No, I didn't, but I know dad would never cheat on you, mom."

She sighed. "That was the general opinion among those two women. Your dad was un-seducible."

I looked at her confused. "Then why are you mad, Mom?"

She shrugged. "It bothers me that young girls are lusting after your father."

I laughed. "Mom, I'm trying my best to get them all lusting after me, but there is so much one man can do."

Mom smacked me on the shoulder. "You're impossible."

I grinned. "So what did you do mom? Did you just leave?" I had to ask her because mom is not the type of woman that would walk away from that situation.

Mom chuckled. "No, I interrupted their conversation and introduced myself. I told them I was Mrs. Tantiss and the only person in the galaxy who ever reached the peak of Mount Tantiss. And _'Yes'_ he _is_ proportionally huge everywhere."

"Mom! Gross! That is way too much information!" Oh Force, this is going to get around the Temple. "What did they do?"

Mom gave me a smug smile. "They turned bright red, apologized, and slunk out of the gym."

I was both horrified and highly amused. Right then my father came into the apartment smiling brightly. He took one look at my mother and his smile slipped off his face. He can see mom is upset.

I got up and walked to the door. "See you Mom and Dad. I'm going to the dining hall to eat."

There was no way in the Nine Corellian Hells that I was going to stick around. I'm sure dad is alright. He didn't do anything wrong…but I am fairly certain he is going to be wearing a shirt in the gym from now on. Ha!


	12. Chapter 12

**_Entry 34_ **

I finished secondary school this week and now I have to make a decision as to what to do with my life. I could go to college or postpone higher education and continue my Jedi training until knighthood like Ben did. Jaden had done the former…mainly because he wanted to be a Jedi healer and having a medical degree would greatly help him in that venue.

I had asked my Dad if I should consult the Grand Master to see what I should do. Dad just scoffed and said it was my life and I was that master of my destiny, not Uncle Luke.

Dad has a weird relationship with Grand Master Skywalker. He goes on missions and follows orders, but he makes it very clear that he's doing it because he wants to. I have yet to see my Uncle Luke make Dad do something he adamantly opposed. My mom said it was because Dad is Luke's altered clone. He is determined to be his own man and not live in Luke's shadow and if that means defying Luke…then so be it. Mom said my father would walk away from the Jedi if it ever conflicted with his family life. "I am married to your mother," my dad would often say. "Not the Jedi."

I am leaning toward going to college part time and continue my Jedi training. Dad also recommended that I attend some military schools. Despite what he says about doing what I want…I am fairly certain he would be thrilled if I went to Jump Trooper training. Dad loves the military and volunteers often to accompany GA troopers into combat as a Jedi asset.

In fact he once told me he would rather be a full time Jump Trooper than a Jedi. If he wasn't married and with kids he probably would have left the Jedi Order to do so. But Dad knew that would mean he might be stationed off of Coruscant and he couldn't bear to be away from Mom and he wasn't going to make her give up being head chef of the most exclusive restaurant on the planet so she could follow him around the galaxy and end up stationed on some rim world remote outpost.

I asked Dad why he joined the Jedi if he didn't like it and I was surprised by his answer…he did it to impress Mom and my grandparents. He thought he had no chance to win my mother's heart if he was just a smuggler in Karrde's organization. You know…I sometimes think dad has a self-esteem problem. I guess when you are created in a laboratory and fated to become a muted, chemically lobotomized slave to a dark Jedi…it might cause problems with your self-image.

Anyway, I thought it was funny that dad became a Jedi to get the girl. Ha…we are more alike than I thought. Not that I am becoming a Jedi just to get the girls…but it doesn't hurt. We are local celebrities. I can't walk around town in my Jedi robes without being stopped and asked if I will pose with a tourist for an Imager photo.

A lot of women (and possibly men…I have to ask Jaina or Jysella) think it is prestigious to date a Jedi. In fact there are women who cruise for Jedi outside the Temple. Some of the guys call them Temple-yummies. Of course, I wouldn't dare call a woman by this derogatory term…mainly because if my Master ever heard me use that particular phrase my shoulders might suddenly become lonesome for my head. Making sexist comments around Mara Jade Skywalker is not good for your health (and not just Aunt Mara, my Mother can be scary when she's mad).

The Temple-yummies are basically Jedi groupies and they have a unique way of picking up Jedi. They walk by the temple and stop a young Jedi and ask him if he knew how to get to some dangerous location in the lower levels. The Jedi would tell her how to get there and then warn the pretty young lady of the dangers. Inevitably, the young lady will convince the Knight or Apprentice to escort her there. On the way to the location comlink codes are often exchanged…and then one thing leads to another.

I am not into dating women I meet on the street, but Valin is the Master at escorting ladies around Coruscant—Valin Horn Male Escort. HA! I think he has dated over two dozen young ladies he has met this way…but he is of Corellian blood…so that is sort of expected. Valin once told me Raynar was outside the temple when a Jedi groupie stopped to talk to him…but it was a guy. HA! Hey, maybe Raynar shouldn't wear those outlandish, silk robes and capes.

I know I shouldn't laugh...but to be honest, I don't like the guy. He is an insufferable, arrogant, boorish lout.

But I wandered off the subject…getting back to my dad and the Jedi. He agreed to train as a Jedi to impress my Mom. I guess it worked because she married him.

Still, dad says he really doesn't feel comfortable being a Jedi. He told me there is always the threat of going to the darkside and that scares him.

I remember telling him, "There is no way you would ever turn to the darkside Dad."

He just shook his head and said. "Don't be so sure." After an awkward pause between us he continued. "The future is always in motion."

I asked him what he meant by that, but he just waved me off saying he had an appointment to go to.

I sometimes wonder if Dad saw something…maybe a dark vision of the Future. Did Dad see himself going to the Darkside while in that evil cave on Dagobah? If so, that doesn't mean anything. Uncle Luke saw himself becoming Darth Vader. It doesn't necessarily show what you will become, but what you fear you might become.

My Dad would never turn to the Darkside. He loves his family way too much.

I'm rambling again.

College or Knighthood, which should come first? I need to think about my decision some more.

.

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**_Entry 35_ **

I told my dad I decided to concentrate on becoming a Jedi Guardian and asked him if he could arrange for me to attend Jump Trooper training. I wanted to have a well-rounded military education so I could easily work as a Jedi asset with regular troops like he does.

I have never seen my dad happier. Ha! Dad was always telling me it doesn't matter to him what I did with my life as long as it's honest work, but when I told him I want to follow his footsteps his chest puffed out so far I thought he would bust out of his tunic. That makes me feel good. I hate to admit it, but part of the reason I decided on Jedi Guardian is to make my father proud. I know he says he's proud of me, but I am such a pain in the butt to him with all the trouble I get into…I'm fairly certain I'm not on the top of his list of favorite sons.

I told my mother about my decision and she didn't seem too thrilled. I think she would rather see me in a less dangerous profession like a Jedi healer like my brother or historian like Master Tionne Solusar. I'm not saying that Mom was opposed to me going the Jedi Guardian route, but I don't think she's looking forward to worrying about another loved one going into harm's way.

Somehow I can't see myself being a Jedi Historian like Tionne. I don't like doing research and I don't think I would be any good at playing a double viol and singing Jedi ballads. Ha!

I shouldn't tease Master Solusar. She is great at playing the Viol and has a great voice…but as a teenage boy I really don't want to learn about the history of the Jedi via ballad. I mean she once taught us about Nomi Sunrider and the Great Sith War by singing _The Ballad of Nomi Sunrider_. Some of the girls liked the song, but my brother and I were sitting in the back of the auditorium bored to death and hoping an actual Sith Lord would show up to interrupt the performance.

Come on…really…a ballad to teach us about the Great Sith War? I don't want to hear a song…I want to see a HoloAction drama with great special effects, computer generated lightsabers and lots and lots of violent action scenes.

But maybe that's just me…and every other teenage guy in the room.

But, I digress.

Dad said he'd talk to Uncle Luke about putting a training request in for me. Until then I will be working on some of the different lightsaber forms and perfecting them. The lightsaber combat methods I have almost mastered are called _Makashi_ (this is mainly for lightsaber to lightsaber dueling) and _Soresu_ (using the saber to defend against a blaster).

My father favors a method called _Shien/Djem So_ and he has taught me that form of combat. It is a method usually used by tall and muscular Jedi that may have less agility, but a lot of muscular power. My father doesn't like doing a lot of flips if he doesn't have to. I really need to work on the combat form called _Ataru._ This involves a lot of movement such as lunges and Force leaps. My Master is very good at it and has tried to teach me, but I doubt I will ever be as nimble and quick as Jedi Master Mara Jade Skywalker.

Jedi Guardian…I feel good about this decision.

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**_Entry 36_ **

I turned nineteen-years-old today. My parents threw me a big party at the restaurant they own. I got to invite my friends and family. It was a nice time and I got some greats gifts. My mom and dad got me a new Hologame system and some games. My Master bought me a really awesome vibroblade that has a boot sheath. The Solo family got me some gift certificates for food and drink at a tavern. Tionne sung me a ballad. Ha ha.

It was a nice ballad and when I saw my brother smirking I was pretty sure he told Tionne that it was something I would really like. So I made sure to tell her how much I enjoyed it. It _was_ nice actually. It was the story of the attack on Wayland. That is where my dad was found. So it had real meaning to me. It got my mother crying (she's always happy crying) and I am pretty sure my Aunt Mara's eyes misted up a bit…but she would never admit it and I wasn't going to mention it just in case she decided to use my new vibroblade on me.

Ben told me he would give me my present later. It turns out that after the party he and my brother decided to drag me to a new nightclub called the _Pandering Predator_. At the club Ben met up with his gorgeous red Twi'lek friend, Niki, and Jaden hooked up with Kelli. I was afraid they were going to pair me off with Sara again …which would look weird since she was probably eight months pregnant by now, but they didn't. They introduced me to a buxom, red skinned and blue haired Zeltron named Nalli'ti.

What is it with my brother and Ben trying to hook me up with women? Do they think I can't do it myself?

Nalli'ti was an Art major at the college Jaden attended. I never dated a Zeltron before, but I heard a lot about them...like they are very liberal minded and open about relationships.

I have to admit she _is_ beautiful. She was wearing a very colorful and revealing tight outfit that showed off her best feminine qualities. Zeltrons produce pheromones that are used to attract a mate, or at least make them more alluring to others. They can also project emotions onto other people. I am pretty sure she was doing both during the night. I had trouble taking my eyes off of her. I really don't want to get too involved with a Zeltron though. I was always told they don't believe in monogamy and I wouldn't want to have a girlfriend that didn't think there was anything wrong with making out with my friends. Of course, I wasn't in the market for a love connection at this point in my life, so I just enjoyed myself. She was really nice and we had a great night of partying, but, wow, can that girl drink. I was told that Zeltrons have a second liver, which allows them to drink far more than a normal human without getting wasted. She pretty much proved that was true. Luckily Ben and Jaden were paying the bar bill tonight.

It was a fun night.

**_Entry 37_ **

The Force-user rapist we caught on the Corsucanti University campus is finally going to trial. At first the suspect was going to be sequestered in a Model S-3 Force Cage possibly in a separate room where he could view the trail and give his testimony via closed-circuit Holoprojector. That was a special precaution to keep him from influencing the jury through the Force. Unfortunately, the sleemo threw a hydrospanner into the works by demanding his right to represent himself…so he is going to act as his own lawyer.

You know what they say, _'A man who acts as his own attorney has a karking di'kut as a client'_.

In this case the guy wasn't that stupid. He gets to see all the evidence against him, he gets to call in expert witnesses, and cross-examine those testifying against him. Because of this he can't be quarantined from the courtroom.

Therefore another system was needed to keep him from using the Force on the people around him. Uncle Luke was reluctant to bring in the ysalamiri into the courtroom because he really didn't want everybody to know about the creatures. He didn't need every criminal in the galaxy descending on Myrkr to capture Force-hindering ysalamiri.

He decided to tell the court officials he had a machine that can send out a Force dampening field that would saturate the courtroom. In reality it was an air-conditioned box with a ysalamiri inside. Ha! I bet criminal warlords everywhere are trying to find some way to reverse the field flow of the Force Cages.

This should be an interesting trial.

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**_Entry 38_ **

**_Note: This entry was edited after the conclusion of the trial. I was able to get a copy of the transcripts, so I was able to go back and write down exactly what was said by the trial participants._ **

**_~Talon Tantiss~_ **

 

Okay, I need to record what is going on with this trial because it is un-kriff'n-believable. First of all, they finally got a name for this guy. Once his holo was released to the public he was identified as Venku Turman, a con artist from the planet Phindar. Obviously he graduated from swindling to sexual predator. Or maybe he simply was never caught assaulting women while he lived on Phindar. At least we had a name to call him, although I didn't mind using the nickname I had for him, _Kriff'n Sleemo_.

Venku Turman decided to bring forth an ingenious defense. He claims the spirit of a Sith Lord possessed him and therefore he was not in control of his mind and body during the possession. Because of this he cannot be held liable for his actions during the time he was not in command of his faculties. This would be a hilarious defense if it weren't for the fact that he was trying to subpoena Grand Master Skywalker as an expert witness. He wants Uncle Luke to appear for a deposition to be conducted by the suspect's attorney…who is Mr. _Kriff'n Sleemo_ himself.

Uncle Luke was really hot under the collar about the nerve of this man. The Jedi captured him and now he wants the Grand Master to testify for the defense?!

Uncle Luke got his own lawyer who argued to the judge that, _'Although Grand Master Luke Skywalker is the undoubtedly the foremost authority of the Force, Jedi and Sith in the known galaxy, he had no relationship with the suspect prior to his arrest and therefore has no duty to enter into an agreement to render services as an expert witness on request_ '.

The Sleemo countered that argument stating, ' _Coruscant law allows the defendant's defense attorney to compel expert testimony from a professional if the defense counsel can demonstrate a compelling necessity for the expert's testimony. The defense understands it can only ask for previously formed opinions and it cannot require the witness to engage in any out of court preparation…but since the Grand Master's Attorney has testified before the court that Master Skywalker is the foremost authority in this matter…then it seems unlikely any research would be needed to give his opinion on Force related matters'_.

Stang! Did this guy go to law school? I guess he was reading out of the law books at the time. Well, there were some arguments over this subpoena and finally the judge said this was a special circumstance.

' _Normally the defense has a multitude of possible expert witnesses to prove their case, but the Jedi is an exception,' the Judge said. 'The Jedi are a small order and all Jedi could theoretically be compelled by the Grand Master not to cooperate with the defense. The Jedi Order does not normally give public access to their library and since the law library database available to a defendant does not include any information on the Force or Sith this court rules that this is a special circumstance. Therefore if a volunteer expert witness cannot be found, this court orders the Jedi Order to provide the defendant some form of access to the Jedi Library materials.'_

Oh kriff! This is turning out bad. Uncle Luke finally agreed to act as an expert witness. I am sure the defense will call him a hostile witness.

Ha! I know this is not funny, but the arrogance of this defendant is so unbelievable that it is almost funny.

Almost.


	13. Chapter 13

**_Entry 39_ **

Since I am a witness in the trial I couldn't be in the courtroom. I was confined to the witness room until I testified. We are not supposed to talk to each other about the court case while in the room, but we were allowed to talk about other stuff. The room was packed with witnesses. There was Erek Gowen, the arresting officer and then the Jedi: Jaina, Jaden, Jysella, Ben and I. I noticed Erek likes to sit next to Jaina and flirt. Surprisingly Jaina hasn't performed some deadly throat strike to silence him…maybe Erek has a chance after all. Sara Katarka is also in the room with us along with a couple other women (who I assume are the other victims) and two men who I didn't know.

I moved over to Sara and sat down in an empty seat next to her. Her belly is huge and it looks like she will have the baby any day now…hopefully not during the trial.

"Hey Sara," I said tentatively. I am not sure how she will react to my presence. The last time we saw each other was in court. I was pleasantly surprised when she smiled at me.

"I would think you would be furious with me, after all I put you through," she said sadly and I could feel her remorse flowing through the Force.

I smiled. "It's not your fault. You couldn't know some dirt bag Force-user would make you forget what happened. It makes sense to think I was the father. Knowing what you did then, it would be the only reasonable conclusion you could come to."

She gave me a warm smile. "Thanks Talon." She looked down at the floor hesitantly. "I wish you _were_ the father. Having drunken sex with a Jedi is a much better scenario than what actually happened."

' _Of course that would mean I'm a sleemo who takes advantage of drunken women,'_ I thought, but I didn't say anything because think I know what she meant.

She started to cry and went to give her a hug, but then stopped. I wasn't sure how an assault victim would react to that type of contact. Fortunately Sara took the decision out of my hands when she turned and put her head against my shoulder. I wrapped an arm around her and tried to comfort her.

"It's going to be alright, Sara."

After a few minutes she pulled away from me apologizing for getting tears all over my Jedi robes.

"Don't worry," I said. "They are extra absorbent." After a long pause I ventured a question that was weighing on my mind. "Are you going to raise the baby?"

She shook her head. "No, and what happens to the baby depends on the outcome of this trial."

I gave her a confused look. "How so?"

"My attacker says he is innocent by reason of Sith possession and therefore he's demanding his parental rights."

I know my jaw dropped. This sleemo is trying to torment his victims beyond the crimes he did? "You're kidding me?"

She shook her head. "No, he told my lawyer that he'd pursue custody or visitation. If he is found guilty he said he'll request the court that I bring the child to the prison for visitations." She turned to me. "Have you ever visited a prison?"

I shook my head. "No, not as a visitor. I've toured a facility as part of a Jedi professional development class."

She heaved a sigh. "My lawyer told me I have to be searched…thoroughly. The baby would be searched. It would be an awful process. Meanwhile, he is blocking my plans to give the baby up for adoption. My mom is friends with a couple who have been trying to conceive for years. They would be able to give my son a better living environment and future." She hesitated for a moment. "I probably could raise him…but I don't know if I could do it…I don't know if I would harbor some resentment because of the way he was conceived." She wiped tears from her eyes. "I know that makes me sound like an awful person."

"No Sara…you are just being honest," I said. "I think most people would think that way. They just wouldn't admit it to themselves…and then they would try to raise a child while harboring those feelings. I think it's good that he is going to have a mom and dad."

"Maybe…" she said sadly.

I nodded. "I'm sure everything will turn out alright. The judge would have to be crazy to let this guy anywhere near the baby."

"I hope you're right." She rubbed her hand over her belly. "Thanks Talon. You're a good guy."

I felt so bad for Sara. She is going to have to be cross-examined by her rapist and he is practically stalking her with threats of obtaining visitation rights. This shouldn't be allowed. Why should the victims have to be re-traumatized by the perpetrator?

I'll never understand the legal system.

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**_Entry 40_ **

The trial started. The prosecution and defense gave their opening statements. The prosecutor said he would prove by DNA, Holovideo and witnesses that Venku Turman was the man sexually assaulting women and using the Force to hide his crimes. Turman said in his opening statement that although his body might have committed the crimes he was not in control of himself at the time of the attack, but, in fact he was possessed by the Spirit of a Sith that took away his free will…and therefore he is innocent by reason of Sith Possession.

Jaina, Jaden, Jysella, Ben and I were called to testify in court about Venku Turman's arrest. Jaina was in and out of the courtroom quickly. She chuckled and told me Turman was scared to cross-examine her. Unfortunately, he had no such trepidation with me.

"Mister Tantiss," the sleemo said while I was in the witness stand. "Or should I call you Jedi Tantiss?"

I leaned forward and spoke into a microphone. "I would prefer Jedi Tantiss."

Turman smirked at me. "Jedi Tantiss are you aware of the charges filed against me?"

"I don't know all the charges verbatim," I admitted. "But I know the main charge of rape."

"And are you also aware that I am accused of a sexual assault against Miss Sara Katarka?"

I wasn't sure where he was going with this line of questioning, but I already didn't like it. "Yes."

"Jedi Tantiss, isn't it true that weeks prior to my arrest you were brought to court by Miss Katarka in a paternity suit?"

"Yes, but I…"

"A yes or no will suffice," he interrupted me. "And isn't it true that you were one of the Jedi who assisted in my arrest?"

I leaned forward to the microphone. "Yes."

He glared at me. "Don't you think that is a bit of a coincidence?"

I shook my head. "No."

He turned to the jury looking astonished. "No. The man doesn't think it's a coincidence that he is first accused of impregnating Miss Katarka and then he arrests me. Me, Venku Turman, who is now accused of assaulting and impregnating Miss Katarka." He looked back at me. "Maybe it doesn't sound like a coincidence to you because it is all part of a Jedi conspiracy to frame me!" he shouted as he pointed an accusing finger at me in a dramatic fashion.

"A conspiracy?" I muttered. "I thought you were possessed by a Sith Spirit, not framed."

"Oh," Venku said in an overly theatrical manner. "So you admit I was possessed by a Sith Spirit!"

"Huh," I said confused. "No, I didn't say you were possessed."

His eyes narrowed. "Then you admit it was a Jedi conspiracy."

I turned to the judge. "I object. He's badgering the witness." That phrase just popped into my head and out of my mouth, having heard it said many times in Police holodramas.

I guess it was the wrong thing to say because the judge bit his bottom lip and tried not to laugh. "Jedi Tantiss only the lawyers can call for an objection…not a witness."

I blushed. "Oh, sorry." I turned back to the sleemo to see if he had more questions for me…which he did.

"Jedi Tantiss," _Mr. Kriff'n Sleemo_ continued. "Isn't it true that not only did _you_ provided a semen sample for the paternity case, but also two other Jedi?"

"Yes," I said reluctantly.

The defendant-turned-lawyer turned to the Jury. "What we have here is a gang of Jedi predators who were caught with their pants down, so to speak, and therefore they frame an innocent person for their crimes." He turned to me. "Isn't that true, Jedi Tantiss?"

"No and there's DNA evidence to prove it." I shouted back.

Venku's brow furrowed like he just remembered that little detail. He turned to the audience. "Ladies and gentlebeings of the Jury. We all know about Jedi Mind Tricks. I propose that this Jedi gang of sexual predators were covering their tracks by leaving the semen of innocent men at the scene of the crimes."

"Where would I get your semen?" I yelled out and then was admonished by the judge for speaking out of turn.

Venku turned and walked up to me giving me an accusing look. "Where indeed? I propose that your victims are not only woman, but also men. You take DNA from the men to frame them and then use a memory rub to make them forget."

My jaw dropped. I wasn't sure, but think he just accused me of being an equal opportunity rapist. Stang! I really don't want to visualize what he just accused me of doing. Yuck.

"I object, Your Honor," the prosecuting attorney finally spoke up. "Jedi Tantiss is not accused of any crime. The defense should not be allowed to cast disparaging remarks about him in open court."

"Overruled," the judge said. "I'll allow it, but get to the point quickly Mr. Turman."

The defendant gave the judge a greasy smile. "Of Course your honor. My theory is Jedi Tantiss and his two accomplices are using their Jedi powers to overcome women's objections and have sex with them."

"Women aren't objecting to having sex with me," I blurted out. Over in the public observation seating I could hear a groan and see my Uncle Luke smacking the palm of his hand to his forehead in dismay. I am pretty sure I said the wrong thing…again. I didn't mean it that way. I was just trying to say I wasn't going around asking women to sleep with me…therefore they have no need to object.

Venku pounced on that comment. "You never had a woman object because you are using a Force suggestion!" He looked over to the Jury. "After he takes away the woman's will to object he has his way with her and then he uses DNA taken from his previous male victims to impregnate or contaminate the crime scene to hide his misconduct." He then melodramatically turned and went back to the defense table. "No further questions your honor."

The judge looked at the prosecuting attorney. "Do you have further questions for the witness?"

The lawyer stood with a sigh. "Jedi Tantiss, did you ever have sex with Miss Katarka?"

"No," I said adamantly.

"Are you a part of a roving gang of Jedi sexual predators?"

"No!"

"If you wanted to have sex with a woman would you have to use a Jedi Mind Trick?"

"No."

"What would you do instead?" the prosecuting attorney asked.

"I would use my classic good looks and charm I suppose," I said jokingly. There were some chuckles from the Jury. I looked over to my father who was sitting next to my Uncle Luke as he moaned and buried his head in his hands.

"Did you ever do a Jedi mind trick on Mr. Turman to sexually seduce him in order to acquire a sample of his DNA?" the lawyer continued.

"What! NO!"

"No further questions Your Honor," the attorney for the prosecution said and sat down at his seat.

The judge looked at the defendant. "Mr. Turman, do you have any more questions for the witness?"

"None, Your Honor," he mercifully said and I was excused.

This is a bunch of mynok crap. It is bad enough that I get blamed for knocking up Sara, now this guy is trying to say I am sexually assaulting men and women and trying to do a cover up!?

I am glad the ysalamiri was in the room or I might have gone to the darkside and shot Force lightning at him!

.

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**_Entry 41_ **

After my testimony I was brought back to the witness waiting room. Sara was called next. Before she left I wished her good luck. I really hoped that sleemo didn't humiliate her like he did me. She smiled and said. "Venku Turman used the Force to make me forget his face. Today I am going to make damn sure he'll never forget mine."

I was proud of her. She has only weeks until delivery and she is facing further litigation with that sleemo over custody of the baby, but she is standing tall and resolute.

A few minutes after she left my father swung by the witness room and said Sara would be the last witness of the day and I was excused. He offered me a ride home to the Temple. On the drive home my dad sat next to me in the airspeeder smirking. I looked over at him. "What?"

My dad chuckled. " _I_ _would use my classic good looks and charm',_ he said trying to mimic my voice, but I am fairly sure I don't sound that stupid."Ha! That was almost as good as, ' _Women aren't objecting to having sex with me'"_ He shook his head. "This is going to be all over the media Talon. It's a good thing that I dye my hair because I'm sure it would be gray by now."

I frowned. "Well at least you're not being accused of collecting DNA from unsuspecting men to throw the police off an extensive trail of sexual assaults."

My dad laughed out loud. "How exactly does that collection process work?"

"Shut up!" I practically snarled at my dad. I was horrified by the questioning today. I dread seeing the spin the holonet puts on my testimony.

**_Entry 42_ **

The legitimate media venues had headlines praising the grace and determination of Sara Katarka. The sleemo-sludge Holozines had headlines like: _Suspected love child of Grand Master admits to being a Jedi stud! Dozens of women now claim Talon Tantiss fathered their child!_

So now I'm the one requesting paternity tests to prove my innocence. Why doesn't Ben have these problems? He **_IS_** the son of Luke Skywalker and I am fairly certain he's getting much more action then I am…unfortunately.

The galaxy is not fair…but I have a feeling I should get used to that


	14. Chapter 14

**_Entry 43_ **

Will this court case ever end? I think Turman knows he is going to jail so he keeps asking for a court recess so he could do one thing or another. It is making this trial drag on and on. I think the Judge is allowing the recesses because he doesn't want to be accused of judicial misconduct, such as being biased or hostile against the defense. He definitely doesn't want the sleemo to call for a mistrial because then the court case would have to start all over.

**_Entry 44_ **

Uncle Luke was called as an expert witness on Sith Possession and because of his time on Byss he knew it was possible for a Sith to possess a body. Palpatine almost took over my dad's body. If dad didn't grab his ysalamari in time my brother and I might never have been born and we probably be ruled by the Emperor Reborn in my father's body.

In that case, I would hope I'd never be born. I have seen holo dramas of the Emperor and he was one creepy human. I wouldn't like to have old yellow-eyes as my father and probably some Imperial concubine as my mother...especially since I discovered Palpatine's only known son had an eye growing out of the back of his head. What? I'm cracking up while writing this. Palpatine supposedly fathered a white-haired humanoid mutant with three eyes. That's hilarious. I really hope he didn't cut any child support checks without a paternity test. Maybe he should have taken a closer look to his three-eyed security guard. Ha! Just kidding. Genetically, I guess any children would look like my Dad...you know, tall, blond, muscular and really good looking like me. Ha!

Once again I am rambling.

Getting back to the trial...I wasn't in the courtroom during his testimony but I was told Uncle Luke didn't fall into any traps. When Venku was questioning him about Sith and possession Uncle Luke said he couldn't really help him unless he revealed the name of the alleged Sith that occupied his body.

When Venku didn't answer right away the judge told him to disclose the name or release his witness. The Sleemo probably didn't research his defense too well because he named one of the only Sith Lords he was probably familiar with…Palpatine.

Uncle Luke scoffed. "That's impossible. After the destruction of Byss the Jedi found the spirit of Palpatine and imprisoned him within something called the Wall of Light. It would be easy enough to confirm that he's still trapped. Besides…" Uncle Luke gave this guy a snarky look. "I've known Palpatine, I've fought Palpatine and you, Sir, are no Palpatine."

Ha, ha, I love that. My dad was cracking up when he told me.

My uncle told the jury that Palpatine did not possess Venku Turman. This scumbag was just a low-level Force-user taking advantage of women.

Eventually the case went to the Jury. It only took two hours before they came back with a guilty verdict. The judge sentenced him to twenty years of confinement and severed Turman's parental rights to all known children conceived through his crimes. That made Sara happy…and I was very happy for her. I hope her son has a good life.

I was told the Armand Isard Correctional Facility is adding a special wing with specialized cells that act as large Model S-3 Force Cages. My Uncle Luke was a bit concerned that the prison added an entire wing of these specialized cells and not just one. I swear my dad and uncle act a little paranoid when it comes to the government and the Jedi. First it was the Phrik ore on the planet Seylott and now they are suspicious about the GA building a wing of prison cells that are modified Force cages. It is almost like they expect the government to turn on them.

I am hoping that my dad and the Grand Master are just government conspiracy theorists and they didn't have a vision that they're not telling me about.

I'm glad that the trial is over. It took three months! And I was told that is really fast for a court case that generated so much public interest.

Now things can get back to normal…I hope.

**_Entry 45_ **

Tahiri and Anakin had their baby. It is a boy that they named Jos. He has blond hair and blue eyes and is cute for a toothless crying machine.

I have seen holos of Anakin when he was a baby and this kid is the spitting image. My brother said there is an evolutionary explanation for this. He said he read an article published by the Journal of Human Evolution that stated babies look like their dad when they are very young to ensure their survival. In ancient days the only person who could be one hundred percent positive that a child is genetically theirs was the mother. In those primitive times it was imperative that the mother have the support of the father to help raise the baby. If the father didn't believe the child was his he might abandon the woman and child. For this reason, humans developed a unique evolutionary survival technique—babies have a tendency to favor the father when born. Once a father is reassured a child is his, he will invest time and energy hunting for food for mother and child. The child eventually may end up looking like his or her mother when older, but as babies they look more like the father. It's like a built in evolutionary paternity test.

My brother is always throwing around medical facts like that. At least this fact isn't disgusting or weird like Hutt apophallation or how a Filar-Nitzan—a gaseous sentient being—was extracted from a large nosed Kubaz who accidently inhaled the creature.

In a galaxy full of strange and unusual sentient beings and creatures there is no shortage of strange medical stories.

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**_Entry 46_ **

The last few months have been without drama…amazingly. I am still working on my lightsaber forms. Corran Horn is teaching me hand-to-hand combat. I still can't beat Jacen in grappling, but I am getting close. I am fairly good at telekinesis, such as Force shoves. Corran can't do telekinesis for some reason and he hates it when people use it on him. When we train at hand-to-hand we are always in a room with a ysalamiri.

I wanted to learn some new skills so I decided to do some research. I tried working with the Jedi Holocron and talk to Master Bodo Baas the holographic gatekeeper, but for some reason when I told him my name he said he wouldn't work with ' _The spawn of the insolent forgetter of names'_. When I asked my Master what Master Baas meant by that, she laughed and said my father really irritated the gatekeeper years ago and the old Jedi is holding a grudge.

Since I can't use the Holocron, I have to research the old fashioned way by reading books found on Ossus. Yuck! Who reads a book anymore? They are dusty and musty, but when I complained I was told Tionne was looking for a volunteer to scan the thousands of flimsiplast tomes and put them in digital format. No thank you, I'll read the books and keep my mouth shut.

Inside one book I found a reference to something called Postcognition. This is when you can hold onto an object and tell what person held it before you and what he or she was doing. A person who masters this technique can also go into a chamber and see what had transpired in that particular room. I was told we were drawing upon the Force's memory.

My Master knows how to do Postcognition, but is not very good at it. Surprisingly, the Grand Master has trouble with the technique also. I was told there maybe a genetic component to some Jedi skills. This is a little confusing because my dad can't do it almost at all…but for some reason when I was younger my mom could walk into a room and look at me or my brother and immediately know we were either up to no good or we already did something wrong. I sometimes wonder if she has Force abilities and is just keeping it a secret.

After about four months of training I finally was able to perform postcognition. I need to work on control though, because sometimes after I practice that particular psychometry technique I can't turn it off for up to an hour. Which isn't the most pleasant thing. For example, when I go to the 'fresher it can be somewhat disconcerting when touching the handle to flush the toilet. I really don't want a vision of what the last person who touched the handle was doing.

I also learned _never ever_ go to my parents' apartment after I have trained using technique. I did that once and it probably physiologically scarred me for life. I shudder at the vision I saw when I sat on my parents' couch. I jumped out of the seat and went to the dining area, but even the kitchen table wasn't safe to touch. I was supposed to stay and have lunch with my parents, but I lost my appetite. Stang! I can't believe I don't have a dozen brothers and sisters!

I read about Jedi who could do a memory rub. Maybe I need to find a master that can do that to me and get these disturbing images out of my brain. Ack!

.

.

**_Entry 47_ **

Ha! I was in a Jedi apprentice class today with Tionne Solusar about personal conduct and making sure our actions give a positive appearance to the public. Part of the class was about dating. We were given a history lesson on the Jedi Order and their restriction on attachment. We were told that this no longer applies to the Jedi, but Jedi Apprentices and full Knights who teach at the Temple were discouraged from dating each other for fear of the appearance of impropriety.

The Skywalker twins raised their hands and asked questions. "So an Apprentice can date a Jedi Knight that is not in a teaching position, right?" Jak or maybe it was Owen asked.

Tionne nods. "Yes, as long as they are not in a teacher/student situation." She pointed at the other twin who still had his hand up.

"Are Masters allowed to date each other?" he asked. I thought that was an odd question. Everybody knows they can.

Tionne looked a little confused. "Yes, of course."

Then the other twin shouts out. "So Master Dating is okay."

I started laughing. The twins are doing a little word play at Tionne's expense. When Uncle Luke finds out they are in trouble.

Master Tionne looked baffled. She obviously didn't pick up the joke. "Of course Masters date each other."

I bit my bottom lip and tried to reign in my laughter but I could feel my face flush from the effort.

I think Hanna got embarrassed because she stood up and left while scowling at her brothers. "So immature!" I heard her say in a snarky tone.

Finally Tionne realized what they were saying. She blushed and dismissed the class except for the twins. "Jak and Owen you stay here."

Oops, somebody is in trouble. Better them than me. Ha!

.

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**_Entry 48_ **

I haven't gotten in trouble for months. I must be going for a record. It makes me a little nervous. When is the scat going to hit the preverbal fan? Nothing goes this smoothly for me for this long. I may actually make it to my next birthday without getting in the sleemo holozine tabloids. Well, one can hope.

.

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**_Entry 49_ **

I went on a mission with Ben this week. This is the first time that we have worked together without a Master with us. Usually my dad or my Aunt Mara accompany us because we were not knighted yet, but now that Ben is a fully fledged Jedi knight he was assigned a mission and he asked me to join him, which I think is cool. I need the experience.

We were assigned to guard Queen Kaie Indupar acting ruler of the Induparan Crown Worlds…at least until a pure blood heir of the royal line claimed the throne. If the Queen was of the Indupar royal bloodline she could rule, but the late King Odaj Indupar married a commoner so when he died a few days ago apparently without an heir there was a mad rush among the royals to claim the throne. That was until the Queen announced that she was two weeks pregnant with the King's child. Fearing assassination attempts on her unborn child's life she fled to Coruscant.

She requested the best guards and suggested that Jedi be assigned to her. I was really excited to be working with Ben. Given the responsibility to protect a royal made me feel like I was more than an apprentice.

I didn't want to make the same mistake I did on Seylott. I researched the planet Indupar and the royal family of the same name. The late King had been a large man in this mid-thirties who looked very much like Prince Isolder, with blond hair and blue eyes. The queen was a local blond-haired beauty that caught the King's eye when she was working as a teenage model. There was a whirlwind romance and six years ago, at the tender age of nineteen, she became his wife.

The planet has an interesting history. The world was within Separatist space during the Clone Wars. Later it fell under the Eriadu Authority, which was a splinter faction of the Galactic Empire that was formed shortly after the Battle of Yavin. Despite Indupar technically being an Imperial world under the Eriadu Authority, it still maintained its monarchy. After the fall of the Empire the Indupar Crown worlds became independent. They were not part of the GA, Imperial Remnant or any other large governing authority. From what I read Queen Kaie and her husband King Odaj Indupar were the most popular royals in recorded history. The Royal couple strived to establish jobs and schools for the populace and they worked diligently to end poverty on their planet. In the past the royals were known to tax the non-royals into squalor, but King Ojaj Indupar put a cap on taxes of ten percent and didn't squander the money on big palaces, but instead built colleges and libraries.

According to the HoloNet reports the citizens were terrified at the prospect that a less loving leader would take the throne and were thrilled when they discovered the Queen was pregnant.

I am looking forward to protecting this young mother. Well, I guess I shouldn't say young. At the age of twenty-five she is six years older than me.

Ben and I arrive at the posh Monument Crown Hotel where the Queen was staying. We were brought to her quarters and introduced to her and her decoy. Her body double is a young woman named Ema Aiti and the resemblance was absoultely eerie. I thought they could be identical twins…and later I discovered I was right…Ema was the Queen's identical twin sister.

Queen Indupar was very cordial to us and I could understand why her people loved her so. She spoke very eloquently and lovingly of her subjects and her great sadness of the loss of her spouse.

The Queen was in a suite fit for a queen. There was a large sitting area, a kitchen, four bedroom chambers each with a private bathroom and a large ornate balcony with a spectacular view of the Coruscant skyline. Ben and I were told we could have two of the empty rooms. Ema would take another room and the master bedroom would go to the Queen. Ben and I would take shifts guarding her. One Jedi slept while the other stood guard within the apartment. We weren't the only guards…we were just the only ones who had direct access to the Queen. There was a roving police presence throughout the building and outside.

Ben took the first shift and I tried to get some sleep…which isn't easy in the daytime after I had gotten a full night's sleep. Finally at dinnertime Ben woke me up and he went to his room to sleep. I went into the sitting room where I found the Queen and her sister sitting at a dining table eating supper. They both smiled at me and motioned for me to sit.

"Your friend already ate, but there is a meal for you also. We would love it if you would join us," said the Queen. Although the Queen and her sister were identical in looks, I was able to identify her by her demeanor. She never turned off the royal façade, whereas the sister, when not playing the part, appeared more relaxed.

The food smelled fantastic. I sat down and dug into a wonderful bantha steak. I looked down at the food in thought. "Is this take out from the Manarai Restaurant?"

The Queen lowered her fork and looked at me impressed. "I am surprised that a warrior has a palate sophisticated enough to distinguish fine cuisine from one restaurant to another."

I laughed. "My mother probably cooked this meal. It's her recipe." I gave Ema and the Queen a look of pride. "She's the head chef at the Manarai."

The Queen's eyebrows went up. "That is an impressive accomplishment."

I just nodded in agreement. I rarely tell anybody that my parents also own the restaurant. It was too much like name-dropping.

I sat quietly and ate. It's not that dealing with Royalty intimidated me, but I definitely didn't want to say or do the wrong thing. The Queen finally dabbed her mouth with a silk napkin and excused herself from the table. "I think I will retire to my room. I have some documents to read." She looked to her sister and then to me. "You two enjoy yourselves."

I stood when she rose from her seat. "Good evening, Your Highness."

After the Queen retired to her room I sat back down and started back to my meal. Eventually I noticed Ema eyeing me. I looked up to her questioningly. "Is there a problem?"

She shook her head. "No, I just can't get over how much you look like my sister's late husband."

My brow furrowed in thought. "Really? I thought he looked more like Prince Isolder."

She gave me a light chuckle. "You mean the very, tall, handsome, blond haired, blue eyed Prince of Hapes who you look very much like?"

I shrugged. I guess I look a little like him, but I think I am much better looking. "I suppose..." I hesitated not knowing what would be the proper title to call the sister of the Queen. "I know you introduced yourself as Ema, but is there a title that goes along with that? I don't wish to cause a political gaffe by addressing you incorrectly. "

She smiled. "My sister was Queen Consort to the King, therefore her siblings are without royal titles. Her son or daughter when born will be the Prince or Princess until they reach the age of twelve. At that time they could claim the ruling title, but most children usually wait until they have reached the age of majority." She paused. "So…please call me Ema."

I smiled at her. She is a gorgeous woman. "So Ema…do you have a husband or significant other?"

She shook her head. "No, when you are the decoy for the Queen it has a tendency to making dating difficult." She gave me a coy look. "What about you? With your good looks I assume you have a girlfriend."

She gave me a soft smile that would have made my knees weak if I had been standing. "No, no steady girlfriend."

She laughed softly. "I am surprised. I read so much about you on the Holonet."

I groaned. Will I ever escape my ill deserved reputation? "I swear all those stories are lies, Ema. I am _not_ the love child of Luke Skywalker. I haven't fathered multiple extramarital children. I'm not a deadbeat dad. I don't partake in bedroom dress up. I am not into domination scenarios. I have never had a furry fetish with Wookiees or Bothans. I'm not a chubby chaser…although I don't have a problem dating full-figured girls…I just don't specialize in certain body types. I don't do Tauntaun play. I'm not the masked actor in the skinholo _Hold My Lightsaber_ and I never, ever participated in an interspecies orgy with Killiks and Worrites…I mean how would that even be possible…they have exoskeletons and are taller than Wookiees." I stopped and took a deep cleansing breath. I get so irritated when I talk about this subject. "I'm sorry. I get a little aggravated when I think about what the sludge media has done to my reputation. I just want to reaffirm that whatever you read is not true."

Her eyes crinkled up with amusement. "I was referring to your brave actions in capture of the Coruscanti University rapist. I would think women would be falling all over themselves to date a Jedi hero such as yourself."

Okay, now I felt really stupid. I could feel my face flush hotly. "I am sure women would be flocking all over me if I didn't have a totally false reputation of having a carapace sexual fetish."

She laughed. "I find your humor absolutely charming."

I smiled brightly. I am really starting to like this woman. I know I don't have a snowball's chance on Mustafar of striking up a relationship with her—after all she is twenty-five and I was nineteen—but it is nice to fantasize about the possibility. "Thank you. I find you charming also."

Stang! As soon as that came out of my mouth I realized that might seem too forward, but I was relieved when she simply smiled.

"So," I said changing the subject. "Why did you and your sister decide to come to Coruscant? I am sure there were closer worlds that could offer you equal protection."

She gazed into my eyes. "Talon, have you ever heard of H'drachi Seers?"

I thought about it for a moment. I did remember our Jedi Historian, Tionne, mentioning them once. "They are from the Expansion Region," I said. "They are known to utilize the Force to see the future."

"They supposedly read what they call the _'time stream'_. The more H'drachi Seers you have reading that stream, the more accurate the prediction. There are a half dozen seers living within the palace. The King didn't take much stock in their religion. It was his mother who was a believer. She brought them to the kingdom a few years prior to her death." She paused a moment collecting her thoughts. "Within hours of the King's demise they requested an audience with the Queen. They knew she was pregnant before she even knew. They told her to ensure the life of the heir she must go to Coruscant and request protection of the Jedi Knights. Only with the help of the Jedi would the heir of her blood live to rule the house of Indupar. If the King's cousin—a horrible man called Olaf Racine—came into power the seers foresaw our world slipping into civil war. Millions would die and cause a cascade of events that could adversely affect of the fate of the Galaxy."

My jaw dropped. "Talk about pressure. If we screw up this mission the galaxy goes down the Sarlac pit."

She laughed. "I wouldn't get too stressed." She shook her head. "I don't know if the seers are to be believed or not. They could be completely wrong, but they did know about her pregnancy, so the Queen decided to take their counsel."

I squared my shoulders. "Ema, I will do everything in my power to protect the Queen and the life of her child."

Ema reached across the table and put her hand on mine. "I know you will. I have a feeling the Force will be with us."


	15. Chapter 15

**_Entry 50_ **

The late King's cousin accused the Queen of lying about the pregnancy and skipping off to Coruscant to get pregnant. The accusation could get him banished from the planet, but he was so sure he was correct that he publicly denounced the Queen and demanded proof of paternity.

The Queen agreed to provide proof of pregnancy and Ben and I accompanied her to a medical clinic where two blood samples were taken and sent to a local DNA laboratory of her choice and a second sample sent to a laboratory of the cousin's choosing. Although the Queen is only a couple weeks along there is a blood test called a Single Nucleotide Polymorphism (SNP) Microarray paternity test that can be done within a couple weeks of conception. I know about SNP paternity tests because that is what was used for my paternity trial. This particular test is used to identify small DNA fragments from the fetus in the mother's blood stream to determine paternity.

After a couple days the tests came back and to Olaf Racine's great surprise the Queen was pregnant and the King _is_ the father. Opps! I guess he played that situation wrong. The public outcry against him was so intense that he didn't bother to be officially banished. He left of his own accord.

I thought the Queen could go home now that he was out of the picture, but she said the Seers said she should not leave yet. That's okay, I am enjoying this mission. Hanging around royalty is pretty nice.

After a few days I noticed that Ema would try to keep her schedule the same as mine. She would usually stay awake and hang around with me when I was pulling my shift. A few times she would dress up as the Queen and we would go out—usually with a contingent of private security guards—and walk through a park or go to a museum. But that was rare and most of the time we would hang out in the royal suite and talk. I think I was falling in love…and that was a problem. I don't know how professional it would be to start a relationship with Ema. I wasn't even sure if Ema wanted a relationship. I could be misreading her signals. After all, I was a teenager and she was a beautiful, sophisticated woman. Of course, I don't look like a teen. I have my father's build and height, so I look like I am in my mid-twenties.

I needed to talk to Ben about this situation. He is the Jedi Knight in charge of this mission and the last thing I want to do is screw this up for him.

One day I was able to get Ben alone to talk to him.

"Ben," I said tentatively. "I know it would be improper to get emotionally involved with somebody we are guarding…but we are simply guarding the Queen, right?"

Ben grinned at me. "Are you getting a little infatuated with Ema?"

I blushed. "She is beautiful and I think she is interested in me."

Ben laughed out loud. "You wish. She's an older, sexy, attractive woman…why would she be interested in a teenage Jedi Apprentice?" His smile got broader. "Especially when she could have a full Jedi Knight—a man in his twenties, with striking red hair and highly erotic freckles." Ben then started laughing letting me know he wasn't serious.

I punched Ben in the arm. "Knock it off or I'll tell Niki you were checking out Ema."

Ben chuckled. "Don't do that. You'd break Niki's heart." He shoved his hands in his trouser pockets and looked down at the floor in thought. "I don't see anything wrong with you seeing Ema as long as it doesn't interfere with guarding the Queen." He then grinned. "But I think you're dreaming."

He's probably right, but you never know until you try.

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**_Entry 51_ **

Ha! Dreams can come true. Within days Ema and I kissed and she initiated it! I was absolutely shocked. My heart is still beating rapidly. I'm falling hard for this woman. I'm so excited; I really need to record what happened.

Last night, the Queen had retired to her room and Ben was sleeping. It was just Ema and I on the couch in the sitting room. She was telling me all the things she would do if she had Jedi powers…which makes me glad she doesn't have Jedi powers because if she did the King's cousin Racine would be missing his royal jewels… and I don't mean diamonds. Ha! I told her the Jedi are trained not to use our powers frivolously or out of anger or revenge.

She looked at me skeptically. "You mean you never used your powers for something other than Jedi business? I don't believe you."

Stang, she's got me there. "Okay, I have used it to give the occasional wedgie."

Her brow furrowed in confusion. "What's a wedgie?"

"You know when you grab the back of a person's underwear and pull it up forcefully."

"Oh, we call that a shimmie." She laughed. "I hope you didn't do that to Ben. He is such a sweet man."

I experienced a slight twinge of jealousy at that remark, but quickly brushed it off. Ben is a nice guy. "No, not to Ben. I usually do it to my brother."

"Oh, you're bad. I'm glad my sister doesn't have the Force. She's annoying enough as Queen of the Crown Worlds." She laughed and then followed up by, "I'm kidding of course. I love my sister." She crossed her arms across her chest and smirked. "You said earlier that all the rumors about you are false, but be honest with me…have you ever used the Force to influence a woman?"

I blushed and dropped my gaze. "I have, but not in the way you think."

She chuckled. "How so?"

I sighed. "My friends and I were at a sports bar watching the smashball tournament and my brother's date was rambling on and on about something and so I gave her a little suggestion for her to please be quiet and enjoy the game."

Ema's eyes went wide. "You can do that? Make a suggestion and people obey?"

I looked away embarrassed. "Only if they are weak minded or not expecting it. I shouldn't have done it. It's wrong and I immediately felt bad about using the Force in that manner."

She smiled at me warmly. "You are a good man Talon Tantiss. Most people wouldn't have given it a second thought." She then laid her hand on my knee and leaned in a little closer. I looked down at her hand and my breath arrested in my lungs. My mouth went dry and my heart started beating wildly. I was sure she was going to kiss me! I am no virgin, but I am not overly experienced and I never had a mature woman this beautiful making advances on me. She looked deeply into my eyes and said, "Kiss me."

Oh Gods! I was so shocked that I was sure Ben could pick up on my panic through the Force. I was worried he'd come busting out of his sleeping chamber with lightsaber ready…but thankfully he remained in his room. Either he didn't sense my emotions or he knew what was going on. "Okay," I said, my voice was cracking in shocked disbelief as I leaned in and kissed her. It was a soft kiss that lasted only a few seconds before I pulled away nervously. I gazed at her expectantly looking for some approval of my kissing skills.

She smiled widely. "It does work."

I looked at her confused. "What?"

"I made a suggestion and you obeyed. I must be a Force-user."

I chuckled. "Or an exceptionally beautiful woman. I am sure you could persuade any man to do your bidding."

"That must be it, because from what I've seen you are definitely not weak-minded," she said coyly as he lips twitched in amusement.

I gave her a sheepish grin. "My Master and brother would probably disagree with you on that point."

"Well, lets investigate further. Kiss me again," she said in a teasing voice and she might as well have been a Jedi Master because I obeyed eagerly.

After a few seconds I pulled away from the kiss and gave her a nervous smile. "I might not be weak-minded," I said with a chuckle. "But I definitely have a soft spot in my head for you." I gave an anxious cough and fidgeted nervously. "Unfortunately, I am on duty. I really shouldn't allow myself to be distracted."

"I understand," she said softly. "Perhaps you can tell me more about your family."

I smiled somewhat relieved. I didn't need an assassin creeping into the apartment while I was kissing the queen's sister. And if Ben caught me I would have hell to pay. He is my cousin and best friend, but he is a Jedi Knight with a strong sense of duty. He would never tolerate me letting down my guard.

"Sure," I said and then started rambling on about my brother and cousins and our past adventures. All the time my mind was shouting out, _'We kissed! We kissed!'_ I'm surprised every Force-user on the planet didn't hear my mental celebration.

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**_Entry 52_ **

Crap! Ben did hear my internal revelry. He came out of his room later that night after Ema went to bed. He was wearing a classic Han Solo lopsided grin and whispered to me in an overtly mocking tone. " _We kissed! We kissed!_ " He then puckered up his lips and made kissy sounds.

I glowered at him. "Knock it off. It was just a kiss and we stopped because I was on duty."

Ben smirked at me. "I know. If you disappeared off into a bedroom when on watch we'd be having an entirely different conversation right now."

I nodded, somewhat embarrassed. I now felt like the young apprentice that I am, whereas Ben is every bit the Jedi Knight…just like his father.

I think he could sense my embarrassment. "it's okay, Talon," Ben said as he walked over to the kitchen to get some juice to drink. "Just keep it on your off-duty hours."

"I will." I said and then gave him a wicked grin. "I told you she was interested."

Ben rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah, once again the Skywalker good looks have helped you get the girl."

I frowned. "You mean my Tantiss good looks." I gave him a wink. "Maybe you can use _your_ Skywalker looks to get the Queen to fall for you."

Ben shook his head. "That's not going to happen and not just because of my duty toward her or because she's a grieving widow," Ben said before he smirked and then made a show of shuddering. "No, the thought that we might end up dating sisters is unnerving. The next thing you know they are planning a big royal double wedding and I am stuck living next door to _you_ for the rest of my life."

I scowled melodramatically. "Hey, what's wrong with me?"

"Other than you are always in trouble? And you usually drag everybody else along with you." He shook his head then smiled. "Never mind, just keep frosty while on duty. This is my first mission as a Knight with an apprentice working for me. It won't look good if I let you get into more difficulties than usual."

"I promise to remain professional while on duty!" I put my hand over my heart to show my sincerity.

Ben gave me a nod. "Good." He then flopped down on the couch and started flipping through the holonet channels. "I'm awake, so go ahead and get some sleep."

"Sure." I got up and went to my room. I was so excited I wasn't sure if I could sleep, but I could meditate. I definitely needed time to process what had happened today.

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**_Entry 53_ **

For the next week I only fraternized with Ema during my off hours and even then we mainly talked. Okay, there was an occasional kiss, but not much more than that. We were taking our time and getting to know each other.

I discovered that our age difference didn't matter that much. We had the same tastes in music and holoshows. We both like watching situational comedies and political thrillers on the holonet. And, last night, to my great surprise I discovered she likes to watch shockball.

We were sitting in my room while off duty and flipping through channels looking for something good to watch when a commercial for a shockball tournament came on. "I really want to see that game," I said offhand not expecting a positive response. Most women I know see the sport as barbaric.

"So do I."

I looked at her in disbelief. "Do you really like the sport or are you just saying that to impress me?"

"Why would I want to impress you?"

I cocked an eyebrow as I continued to flip through the channels . "You know, to sweep me off my feet so you can seduce me."

She just laughed. "Dream on Jedi-boy. But to answer your question I am an avid Shock-ball fan. I mean, what's there not to like? You have very tall, muscular, athletic men wearing very tight pants tossing an electrically charged shockball at each other using either insulating mitts or ball scoops while at the same time trying to prevent being hit and knocked unconscious. I love seeing them get hit, dropping to the ground with muscles twitching before blacking out." She shook her arms and hands for emphasis and then laughed.

A broad smile crossed my face. "Did you see the _Kuat Pirates_ vs the _Shad Furies_ in the finals? It was awesome."

"I bet you liked what happened to Chad Miezer in the second quarter?" She said with mischief in her eyes.

"You mean when he got hit in the groin with the shockball, then fell face first on the ground trapping the ball between his groin and the playing field?"

She was laughing so hard now with tears running down her cheeks. "He was such a jerk to his teammates and the other team players all year long that nobody went to help him. So he just twitched on the field until the referee pulled him off the shockball."

"That's it!" I couldn't believe I found a woman who saw the humor in that as much as I did. "My brother Jaden recorded the game and then made a holo-short with the video of Miezer twitching and then set it to music."

"That was your brother?" She said all excited. "I saw that holo! You have over a trillion hits galactic wide. That's hilarious."

I was still flipping through the channels when she called out. "Stop." I moved back a channel to see a holodrama starting. "This is a fantastic movie about the Jedi. Will you watch it with me and tell me how accurate it is?"

I shrugged. "Sure."

So we started watching a film called _Elusive Bliss_. When she said it was about Jedi I thought we were going to watch an action film, but it was a love story. I guess the title should have clued me in…it's not really an action, blood and guts type of title.

Anyway, although love stories are not exactly my type of film, Ema loved it. It was about a male Jedi in the Old Republic who was in love with a female Jedi in the order. Their love for each other was intense, but they both knew it was also doomed. The Jedi Order in the old days didn't allow marriage. As the movie went on the two love-struck Jedi were faced with the option of running away and marrying or staying with the Jedi and either breaking up or cooling down their relationship back to friends. They decided to run away, but before they could do so, the male Jedi went on a mission and didn't survive.

Ema was all teary eyed at the sad ending. "I'm glad that's not the rules for your order."

I chuckled. "Yeah, I don't think I would be a Jedi otherwise."

She gazed at me thoughtfully. "You would give up being a Jedi for love?"

I shrugged. "Yeah, also the idea of being a sexless Jedi monk isn't very appealing to me, besides I probably would have never been associated with the Jedi if that was the rule. There is no way in the galaxy that my father would have left my mother to become a Jedi. According to him he had turned down Master Skywalker the first time asked and the second time he said he would only do it if he could remain on Coruscant with my mother. That is one of the reasons the Temple was reestablished here. My father would have given up everything to be with my mom."

"That is _so_ romantic," she practically gushed. "You're mother is a very lucky woman."

I smiled. "I think it goes both ways. My dad is equally lucky to find her. They love each other very much and to my great dismay _and_ disgust they are very, and I mean _very,_ openly affectionate." I had to laugh. "I guess that isn't a bad thing, but it's still unsettling to walk in on your parent necking on the couch."

"They are very lucky to have each other," Ema said.

I looked down at the ground and gave a sappy smile. "I hope one day to be as lucky."

She shifted closer to me. "I'm sure you will be," she said softly, intimately. She then leaned in and kissed me.

I reached up as my thumb gently stroked her cheekbones while drawing her closer. We have kissed before, but this was different. I could feel in the Force that she wanted more and that panicked me. She was an older woman and I felt so ill prepared for this encounter. It's different when you are a hormonally addled teenager fumbling through the sexual act with an equally inexperienced teenage girl…usually in the cramped backseat of her parent's airspeeder. It's an entirely different thing to expect to perform to standard with a gorgeous older woman who could have any man she wanted.

I was hesitant to take the next step, but when she nibbled on my earlobe my desire for her went into overdrive. My brain might not know what to do, but my body obviously did.

I am too much of a gentleman to discuss what happened next…but it was FANTASTIC!

I am totally in love.


	16. Chapter 16

**_Entry 54_ **

The most incredible night in my life was followed by the most embarrassing morning in my memory…and that's saying a lot. First off, in the heat of the moment, my passion-muddled brain forgot to set my alarm clock. I was supposed to meet Ben at 0500 hours and at 0510 Ben walked into my bedroom to wake me up.

"Fierfek!" I heard Ben curse in shocked surprise. I opened my eyes still groggy from lack of sleep. I hastily sat up and saw Ben standing at my door with his hand covering his eyes. "For Force-sake Talon, get up and cover up!"

I looked down and realize I was completely nude with parts of me partially awake. I looked over to my sleeping companion and sighed with relief when I realize she was still sleeping _under_ the sheets.

"Kriff!" I swore as I jumped out of bed and quickly pulled on my boxer-briefs and then desperately started looking for my discarded clothing on the floor. In my hurry to dress, I was pulling on my trousers, lost balance and tumbled to the floor with a loud thud, waking Ema.

"Talon?" she mumbled. She started to rise, but upon seeing a Ben at the doorway—his eyes glued to the ground and blushing until he was as red as his Twil'ek girlfriend—Ema pulled the sheets up under her chin protectively. "Hello Ben," she said in a way that it sounded almost like a question. Ema looked over to me and I knew I looked like an idiot as I laid on my back and struggled to pull my trousers over my thighs. She turned back to Ben, gazing at him sheepishly. "This isn't what…"

I don't know what she was going to say, because apparently she realized there was no way to make this seem like it was _anything_ but what it really was. I mean what was she going to say? ' _The broken thermostat controls made the room too cold and we had to use our body heat to keep warm'?_ I probably would have chuckled at the thought if I weren't too busy looking for my socks and tunic.

"I'm just going to stay here under the sheets until you two leave," Ema finally said sounding deeply embarrassed.

"Good idea," I said. "I'll talk to you later, Ema." I wanted to add some sugary nickname, but thought better of it. Ben didn't look too happy. I grabbed my shoes and ran outside closing the door behind me. "Sorry I'm late."

Ben turned to me his eyes bloodshot and with a glare that rivaled his mother's. "Talon, you have to **_learn to shield_**!" He was whispering but the words came out almost like a hiss.

"Ohh…was I projecting?"

Ben's eyes went wide. "Projecting!" He gave a sarcastic laugh. "I bet the Jedi in the Temple could feel the disturbance in the Force…three major disturbances in the Force in one night!"

My cheeks burned with humiliation and I turned away embarrassed. "Sorry Ben."

"Stang!" Ben continued heatedly, "I was sitting in the main sitting room having a nice conversation with the Queen when I was hit by emotions so intense it actually startled me. Then I found myself tormented with what looked like skinholo images floating in my head, starring the Queen's very hot and sexy _identical twin_ sister. Blast! I had to find a way to excuse myself from the room. The Queen almost called in the emergency medical team because I suddenly stood, turned bright red, began sweating and then had difficulty walking!" Ben ran his hand through his hair in frustration. "Damn I hope she thought that was a lightsaber in my pocket."

I tried to choke down a laugh by biting my lower lip! The thought of Ben getting all hot and bothered in front of the Queen was somewhat comical.

"Don't you dare laugh," he said while trying to suppress his own laughter. "I'm just glad the visions were through _your_ eyes and _your_ eyes never left her. Otherwise that would be…" Ben shuddered while giving a look of disgust.

"I guess it was good we didn't have mirrors on the ceiling," I joked and was immediately rewarded with a punch to my shoulder.

"Knock it off. This is a big mission for me. I don't want to look like a fool in front of the Queen!" Ben took a couple deep breaths to calm down and then he chuckled. "Talon why does trouble follow you?"

I gave him my best apologetic look. "I don't know…Skywalker genes maybe?"

"Probably." He sighed and then gave me a determined look. "This is _not_ going to happen again. You _are_ going to _relearn_ how to shield if it takes me all day to teach you. You've grown lax because you lived so long in your parent's ysalamiri infested apartment."

I smiled slightly knowing I was forgiven…otherwise he would have sent me home or forbad me from seeing Ema romantically during the mission. "Thanks, Ben."

So, that's what we trained on until Ben was too tired to stay up any longer. Gods I hope I learned that lesson.

Ema was so embarrassed she stayed in her room most of the day and avoided Ben. I can't say that I blame her. It's not fun being caught with your pants down, literally…not fun at all.

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**_Entry 55_ **

After I finished my security shift I knocked on Ema's door. She had been hiding away most of the day. In the morning, her sister had gone into her room to talk to her, but I decided to give her some space. I could still feel the embarrassment flowing from her through the Force.

Finally, at the end of the day, I gathered up my courage to talk to my mortified lover. I rapped my knuckles on the door and waited for a response. Ema eventually opened up and ushered me in. She was wearing what looked like a sleeping outfit under a bathrobe and I had the impression that she might have spent the entire day lying around embarrassed in bed.

She turned to me and I could see the tension etched on her face. "Did you get in trouble with Ben? Or with the Jedi?"

I smiled lovingly. I expected her to be angry at the embarrassing predicament I put her in, but instead she was worried about me and my standing with the Jedi. I shook my head. "Not really. Did your sister say anything to you this morning about it?"

She shrugged. "Not about us. She said Ben looked ill last night. He had turned all red faced and looked flustered." She sat down on the corner of her bed and looked up at me. "Is he alright?"

I avert my eyes as I rubbed the back of my neck nervously. "Yeah, he's fine."

When I looked back, I noticed a narrowing of her eyes as she scrutinized me. I swear it is the same look my mother gives me when she knows I am lying about something. "What are you hiding?"

I groan in frustration as I walked over and sat next to her. "Ema, you really don't want to know," I warned her.

"Yes, I do want to know." She glared at me. "Tell me."

I gave a defeated sigh. "Force users can sometimes pick up each other's thoughts and images…and…well, when Ben was talking to your sister... when we started our nocturnal activities…and well, he suddenly picked up my thoughts, what I was seeing and my emotions."

"What!" Her eyes went wide and her voice cracked with emotion. "Ben could see what we are doing?" She brought her hands over her face and fell back onto the bed. "Talon, just kill me. I will never be able to look Ben in the eye again."

I gave a soft chuckle. "I don't think Ben will be looking you in the eye for some time either. He is just as embarrassed."

I lay down next to her. "Don't worry, Ben taught me to shield my thoughts. We shouldn't have a problem anymore."

"Oh great. That's comforting. It's too bad he didn't pass on that skill before I gave him the peepshow of a lifetime." Her brow furrowed in thought before she chuckled sarcastically. "I guess that explains Ben's discomfort last night."

I laughed with her. "He told me that he was talking to your sister and suddenly he could picture her naked."

Ema blushed and closed her eyes. "Oh no. The poor man." She turned in the bed to face me. "What do we do now?"

I grinned as I reached out and brushed her silky blond hair away from her face. "I'm off duty until tomorrow morning. Do you want to test my new and improved shielding abilities?"

Her blue eyes glided down my body and gave me a smirk. "You want me to help you in practicing your Jedi skills?"

"You can call it that." I drew her into my arms and kissed her gently. She giggled under my lips and I pulled away and gazed at her confused. "What?"

"You better have perfected this skill; I don't want to torment poor Ben anymore than he was last night."

I gave her a crooked grin. "There is only one way to find out." I then drew her close and kissed her.

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**_Entry 56_ **

I guess I perfected the shielding technique, because Ben didn't give me any more grief…although I am fairly certain that when all said and done he is going to tell all our friends at the temple what happened. After all, we're guys and it's too funny not to tell…even if it's at my expense. I know I couldn't keep it a secret if the situation was reversed.

The next few weeks were the best in my life. Ema and I got along so well. I have never felt so close to anybody before. Unfortunately, one day my Talon Tantiss stupidity flared up again. I guess it was just my immaturity shining through.

Ema and I were sitting on the couch in the sitting area when she had asked me if Talon was a family name.

"No," I said. "I'm named after my father's friend Talon Karrde. He is a smuggler turned trader. My father and Talon fought together against the Emperor Reborn on Byss. But, my middle name is Marcus, which is a variation of my father's name. Why do you ask?"

She shook her head. "No reason. Usually when you hear atypical names they are family names passed down from father to son. I was just curious."

I gave her a bright grin as my hand slipped around her waist. "You're thinking about baby names? Do you want to make a little Talon Junior?"

Now, in my defense I was just joking, but I could feel shock radiate off of Ema through the Force. I tensed. "Ema, I was just teasing. I didn't mean it. I mean, I would like kids one day…in the future…in the far future…not now. I wasn't hinting about anything like that…I know we've just started dating."

Stang I was babbling.

She appeared to recover and smiled at me. "Don't worry Talon. The comment simply caught me off guard." She chuckled. "I think I panicked because I thought you were about to propose." She looked at me embarrassed. "I'm not saying that would be an awful thing…I just mean…not now."

I laughed because she was babbling just like I was. "Hey," I said as I leaned in and kissed her. "I know what you mean."

Things went back to normal by the next day, our comments forgotten. I have to learn not to rush things. I guess because the situation was moving along so quickly I thought I could joke about things like that, but looking back I realized it was stupid. I probably gave her the impression that I am some clingy, love-starved teen.

I guess that is a lessoned learned. Don't be a teenage idiot!

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**Entry 57**

After five weeks on Coruscant the Queen announced the situation on Indupar had stabilized enough for her and Ema to return. I am heartbroken about saying goodbye. Ben and I accompanied Queen Kaie and Ema to the docking bay where the Queen's ship was berthed. Ema and I stood outside the ship holding each other in our arms. She was crying and I was choked up also.

She buried her head against my chest while sobbing. "I'm going to miss you Talon."

"I'm going to miss you too. I know we are early in our relationship, but," I paused for a moment knowing I was going way too fast, but I didn't want her to leave without hearing the words from me. "I think I love you." I took a shuddering breath. "No, I know I love you."

"I love you too, Talon."

My heart swelled with joy at the words. I grabbed hold of her shoulders and gazed at her earnestly, pleadingly. "Let me come back with you. I can finish my Jedi training or go to college anytime. I don't want to leave you."

She reached up and cupped my face with her hands. "Talon, I can't let you throw away everything you have worked toward since you were a boy. If I encourage you to do so your family would hate me…and I couldn't live with myself."

I shook my head adamantly. "My parents will understand, especially my father. To him love and family are the most important things in the world." My mind was racing as I tried to figure out a way to get aboard that ship. "I could work as security. Having a Force-user would be helpful."

"Yes, it would, but not now." She stood on her toes and kissed me on the lips. "Please Talon, don't make any major decisions at this point in your life. We can still arrange to see each other and talk on the HoloNet. After my sister has her baby and things settle down I can take a leave of absence and come to Coruscant. But I don't want to leave her so soon after the death of her husband and while she's pregnant with his son." Tears fell from her eyes and I could feel her anguish. "I also don't want you to throw away all your plans. Finish your training, please."

I dropped my head dejectedly. I knew I wasn't going to change her mind. "You'll keep in touch?"

"Yes, I promise. I'll contact you once I get to Indupar." She gave me a sad smile and then kissed me goodbye.

With a shuddering sigh I watched her walk up the boarding ramp of her sister's royal star yacht and within minutes they were gone.

A hollow, left-behind feeling crept through my body and despite living on the most populated planet in the galaxy, I felt totally and utterly alone.

I looked up and saw Ben watching me from the other side of the dock. He started walking over probably to give me words of encouragement but I waved him off. I was crying and feeling miserable and in this case misery didn't want any company. Ben nodded and walked away leaving me to my grief and memories.

I reached up with a hand and touched my lips as I remember Ema's kiss. I will always remember that kiss. It was so tender and sweet.

Unfortunately… it was our last.

.

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**Entry 58**

Ema kept her word. After she arrived to Indupar she did contact me…unfortunately it was to break up. She didn't even bother sending me a holomessage. It was written text. I got a TEXT MESSAGE!

It was a typical 'Dear Soldier' letter…you know, the type troopers get from their secondary-school girlfriends when they are halfway through Basic Training.

**_Dear Talon,_ **

**_I know I should talk to you personally or by holonet, but I don't have the courage. I am a coward when it comes to affairs of the heart._ **

**_I had the most wonderful time on Coruscant and you are an exceptional man. Under different circumstances I think we could have had a future together, but I am living on a planet halfway across the galaxy and you are on Coruscant. You have your entire life in front of you. You talked about attending University and acquiring your Jedi Knighthood. I would only hold you back._ **

**_I was telling you the truth when I said I loved you._ **

**_Please forgive me, but I need to end this relationship before both of us are hurt beyond repair._ **

**_May the Force be with you._ **

**_Love,_ **

**_Ema_ **

I felt my heart breaking. I often heard the term, ' _he died of a broken heart'_ and thought that was a stupid saying. How can somebody die from heartbreak? Now I know it's true. I felt like something died within me—something died within me and then a horrible evil reached into my body and pulled the decaying carcass out through my heart. Kriff!

After reading the message, I remember throwing the datapad across the room. Luckily my brother was in our quarters and used the Force to keep it from shattering against the wall. I must have caused a major disturbance in the Force because the next thing I know my father is at our door.

I explained to him what had happened and he pulled me into a hug and tried to comfort me, but nothing he could say or do would take the sting out of the loss of love. My father means well, but he never had his heart broken. He often said my mother was his first, last and only. He never dated anybody else. He is one lucky man. Why can't I meet the right woman?

I tried contacting Ema, but contacting somebody living in a royal house is impossible if they don't want to talk to you. After trying for two weeks, I gave up.

My thoughts about her had become obsessive and the Grand Master had me go see the Jedi therapeutic trauma healer, or as I call her, ' _The Head Shrink'_. Jedi Healer Rogek is supposedly an expert on human and near human psychology, but I found her clueless. Yes, I was depressed and heartbroken, but I don't need therapy. It isn't like I was depressed and heartbroken for no good reason. I had a reason. I loved and I lost. It is going to take me time to heal. That's what I told the counselor before I stormed out of her office.

I am pissed. I know that the Grand Master wants to make sure I don't go all darkside over this break up, but I'm not crazy. I'm hurt, I'm sad and depressed and there is nothing wrong with that.

What is worse is I have no idea why this happened? Why? What the kriff did I do? The only thing I can think of is the baby comment. I must have scared her off…but she said she understood. I wish she would at least talk to me so I can get some closure.

Kriff! Kriff! Kriff! Kriff! This is so kriffed up!

I know it was a short fling, but it was my most intense relationship. The break up was emotionally and physically painful. I _never_ want to feel like this again. I am _never_ going to fall in love again. _Never!_

**_Nothing is worth this much pain!_ **


	17. Chapter 17

**_Entry 59_ **

I don't want to do anything or go anywhere. My parents are getting worried about me. My Dad recommended that I attend some military training to get my mind off things. He had put me in for Jump Trooper School, but I'm on a waiting list. The Jedi Academy usually gets only two slots for the school per year and there were five Jedi on the list ahead of me. My dad said he would get me in another way so I am not bumping any of the Jedi already on the list. He said there are sometimes slots held for _'legacies'_.

I asked him what he meant by that and he told me a _legacy_ is a child of a current or honorably discharged Jump Trooper. There are military families who consist of third or fourth generation of Jump Troopers and that can be done because of these slots held for _legacy_ children. He said he would get some of his Jump Trooper buddies to see if a _legacy_ slot was available and, if so, expedite my application. I needed something to get my mind off of Ema, so I told my dad to go ahead and make the arrangements.

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**_Entry 60_ **

I have been lousy at keeping my journal. I know it has been weeks since my last entry. I am still a little heartbroken. I hope dad is right that going to Jump School will help get her off my mind. But I doubt it. He got me a slot and I will be flying off to the planet Null soon. Meanwhile Ben and Jaden have been trying to cheer me up. We go out to the clubs but I mostly pout in a corner while nursing a drink all night. Nalli'ti, the cute Zeltron I met months ago, often comes by to see me and tries to perk me up…in more ways than one. I think she is using her pheromones and abilities to project soothing emotions to ease my pain. I have to admit when I am around her I sometimes feel almost normal…almost. I told her I just got my heart crushed, so I am not interested in a relationship.

She said, "Neither am I. Let's just have fun together."

Maybe that is what I need to do from now on…don't get romantically involved. I can tell the women that upfront. I just want some fun together, but no romantic entanglements. Of course when I tell myself that I feel like a royal sleemo womanizer…but I can't go through another heartbreak like I just did. I don't think I would survive. It's better to never love again than have so much kriff'n emotional misery.

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**_Entry 61_ **

I'm off to Jump School. Mom cried when I left. Dad was smiling broadly and looking proud. Jaden was smirking and told me he would watch over Nalli'ti while I was gone. I punched him.

After I am done with the training I'm expected to work as a military/Jedi asset upon request for a period of five years. It is not continuous service. My dad said he usually spent five or six weeks per year working with the Troopers.

I only hope dad is correct about Jump Trooper training taking my mind off my woes.

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**_Entry 62_ **

Stang! Dad is right. Having half dozen drill instructors in your face and screaming at you does take your mind off a myriad of things. My torture started almost immediately. I arrived at the school and was standing in formation as the Platoon Sergeant called out our last names. We would respond with 'here' when we heard our surname. My introduction to Jump Trooper School went something like this:

"Tantiss!"

"Here, Sergeant!" I popped off.

The sergeant paused. "Tantiss, get over here, front and center."

I didn't know why I was singled out, but I exit the formation and jogged up to the Sergeant. Unfortunately, I didn't have the clone trooper military flash training that my father had when he went to jump school. Therefore, I was never taught that the proper way to exit a formation is to take a step back with the left foot, look to the left and right, and then exit by the shortest route. I instead left the formation by stepping forward and out.

That got an immediate response from the Sergeant. "Tantiss! Don't they teach you drill and ceremony where you come from?!" The Sergeant was about ten centimeters from me and I could feel wayward spittle splash my face.

"No sir."

"Sir!" he screamed hysterically like a deranged mental patient. "I work for a living Tantiss! I am a non-commissioned officer. You will address me as Sergeant!"

I was caught off guard by the confrontation. I wasn't sure what to say now, so I simply said, "Sorry Sergeant." Which I immediately found out was the wrong answer.

"Sorry! You _are_ a sorry piece of bantha dung! That is not one of your approved and proper responses. The only thing I want to hear from you is 'Yes Sergeant, No Sergeant, No excuse Sergeant and Sergeant, I do not understand!'"

"Yes Sergeant!"

By now a couple other Drill instructors wandered over to where I was standing at attention.

"What do we have here?" a short muscular sergeant said as he came up to my drill instructor.

The irate man turned to the newcomer. "I have a Jedi Spook called Talon Tantiss that doesn't know how to exit a formation or how to properly address his drill instructor!"

"Tantiss!" The newly arrived sergeant eyeballed me walking around me and scowling. "Are you any relation to Mark Tantiss?"

I almost let out a sigh of relief. I hoped they knew my dad and would give me a break. "Yes Sergeant, he's my father."

"I can't believe a pathetic piece of skidcrud like you could be related to him." He came around and stared me in the eye. "I served with the man. He is a decorated Jump Trooper. We are going to do right by your father and send you back to him as a qualified Jump Trooper and by the looks of you it is going to be a long and painful process. Do you understand?"

I swallowed hard. "Yes Sergeant."

He took a step back allowing my senior drill instructor to get back in my face. "Tantiss unless you find yourself in a life or death situation I expect you to _not_ use the Force. If I catch you not sweating or breathing hard…I'll know you're cheating and I will kick your sorry ass out of this school. Do you understand?"

"Yes Sergeant!" I reply loudly.

"Get back in formation!"

I turned and moved to join my platoon, but unfortunately I also didn't know that the proper way to leave my position of front-and-center is to do an about-face pivoting motion instead of just turning around like a normal person. That caused another barrage of screaming.

And that is pretty much how my first day went. Fun, fun, fun…and I mean that sarcastically.

.

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**_Entry 63_ **

My life is pure misery. It appears that all the instructors know my father and none want to be accused of showing favoritism so they all decided to be extra hard on me, which meant a lot of push-ups. Luckily, I was a gym regular at the Temple and lifted a ton of weights with Ben and my brother. I am lucky that I worked out so often because the instructors appear determined to break me. I don't think I will have much time to write in my journal. I rarely have free time. When everybody else is given a break in training I am in the latrine cleaning the toilets with a toothbrush. I sometimes wonder if Dad asked the instructors to keep me so busy that I couldn't think about Ema even if I wanted to. If so, it's working.

**_Entry 64_ **

I feel like death warmed over. Today is the twentieth anniversary of my birth. _Happy kriff'n Naming Day_. My mother did send me a huge care package full of food and treats. For an hour after I opened the box I became the most popular Jedi-spook on the planet. I wish I had gone to Jump School incognito like my father. Enlisted soldiers are not very fond of Jedi. They like us just as much as the like officers—which isn't much. We're seen as ' _get-overs'_ …meaning the enlisted guys do all the work while the officers sit back and give orders and I supposedly relax and let the Force do all the work for me. I try to tell them I haven't used the Force, but they don't believe me. You would think my sweat soaked uniforms and blisters would be proof enough that I am telling the truth, but that's not the case. The good news is I am getting close to graduation. I was told my parents were going to attend. It will be nice to see them again. I'm exhausted.

**_Entry 65_ **

Finally, I have time to write! I am on my Master's ship, _Jade Shadow_. I graduated from Jump Trooper School…and with honors surprisingly. After being told I was lower than pond scum for four months it is hard to believe that I would be honored in that way.

My father was EXTREMELY proud. At the graduation ceremony he gave me a big hug and then to my horror the drill instructors came up to me to shake my hand like we were buddies and they didn't actually torture me for the last four months.

"You did a great job," said my senior instructor as he stuck out his hand for me to shake. I reluctantly shook his hand. Maybe a year from now I won't have a desire to Force choke this sadistic jerk, but right now I really dislike the man. I was surprised when my father greeted my tormentor with a shake of the hand and slap on the back.

"I hope you got him sweating," my father said with a grin.

"You better believe it," my instructor replied.

I glared at my father. I am now positive he asked these instructors to be extra tough on me. For the next half hour my father moved along the cadre shaking hands and reminiscing. It appears that my dad is friends with almost all the cadre at the school. Jump Troopers are a small elite group within the Galactic Alliance military so it is not unusual that most of the men know each other.

My mother then embarrassed me greatly by hugging and kissing me and crying about how much she missed me. She was also horrified at how much weight I lost. She said she would make sure I had a good meal when I got home.

My brother came up to me and said, "Better you than me." Jaden is a pretty good Jedi fighter, but he prefers the healing arts. He often told me he has no desire to be cold, wet and miserable when he could work in a sterile clinic.

My Aunt Mara and Uncle Luke were also there. Everybody was congratulating me. I felt pretty good about my accomplishment. I can really understand why my father likes working with the Jump Troopers. I have to admit that doing drops are awesome. I love the armored jump suit. I look forward to going out on missions with my Jump Trooper brothers.

Maybe things are going to go better for me from now on.

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**_Entry 66_ **

I arrive home to my apartment that I share with my brother and get the surprise of my life. My brother acquired a service droid to clean our living area while I was gone. I guess he realized that he's a slob and I am the one that cleans up the apartment most of the time.

Like my father, I don't like droids. My dad never had a droid that could talk. He always unattached the vocalization mechanism for any droid he worked with unless it was absolutely imperative that speech was needed. Dad had once bought a cleaning droid for my mom and it wasn't more than ten minutes before the droid's chatter got my father's nerves and he took his tool kit to the little machine. I still remember the droids plaintive cries. _'Master Tantiss, what are you doing? Why are you touching me there? Oh my!'_ Then silence. I almost felt bad for the droid. After that the little droid would go about cleaning my parents' apartment in a sulking manner.

Getting back to my story…I walk into the apartment and I am greeted by this silver droid. The torso is humanoid with proportions similar to See Threepio, but its manner of propulsion is one wheel with the droid staying upright by way of a gyro.

"Good evening, I am 3-B-99 Service droid at your service. You must be Master Talon. I am very pleased to meet you." The silvery droid said in the most irritating voice. It is worse than Threepio's clip Coruscanti accent. This one has a strange high-pitched twang to its speech. It followed me around the apartment waiting for me to make a mess. It picked up my coat I tossed on the couch and hung it in the closet. When I walked into my room it followed. My brother's pitten, Fuzzy, was on my bed and got all puffy-tailed when the droid came in. Fuzzy made a part growling, part hissing noise and then scampered out of the room.

"Oh dreadful creature that pitten is," the droid lamented. "It seems determined to increase my burden in life. Twice she has urinated on my recharging unit. She'll be the death of me."

I went to my closet and pulled out my mechanic repair kit and threw it on my bed. I opened it up and took out a number of droid overhaul tools. "No," I said to the droid. "I bet I'll be the death of you."

I then opened up the droid's back panel. He didn't like that very much and protested profusely until I disconnected his vocalization mechanism. 3-B-99 doesn't like me very much now, but that's okay. I told him to stay out of my way and out of my room or I will disconnect something else. And stay away from Fuzzy!

I missed the pitten while I was away at Jump School. I think she missed me too. She slept on my chest all night making a happy rumbling noise.

It's good to be home.


	18. Chapter 18

In honor of my graduation from Jump School my mother decided to give me a surprise gift…a family camping trip to the Vlassy Nature Preserve. This is a very secluded and primitive wildlife refuge on the planet Garqi in the outer rim.

Arrgghhh! Why?

I would send my mother a message every week from Jump Trooper School complaining about being forced to bivouac all the time. I guess I should have explained to her that _bivouac_ is the military term for **_camping_**!

I was about to try to get out of going but was startled when my father's voice popped into my head, _'Go Talon, please!'_

Every once in a while, I can pick up thoughts projected from my father, but never this clearly. I looked at him and then to my mother who was practically beaming with joy at the thought of spending time with me. I smiled at my mother and told her that sounded like a wonderful time. Later my father told me that she put a lot of effort into the trip and talked about it for months while I was gone. She knew Jaden couldn't go because of his college classes, but she was really looking forward to spending time with her _'baby_ ' after being gone so long. So after spending four months of misery in the field, I get to look forward to another week of misery in the wilderness with my parents.

I thought it would be just my parents and me, but then my mom told me the really good news. The Skywalkers are going with us. Oh joy. What a wonder vacation that was to be (heavy sarcasm intended). I love my cousins, but all of them together at once can sometimes be annoying.

I got to be around Jak and Owen whose creepy twin talk made me feel like I was having a conversation with a two-headed Troig. Teenage daughter Hanna accompanied her brothers and was a royal teenage pain in the butt. Hanna blamed me for having to go on this camping trip and complained incessantly how she hates being away from her boyfriend. After the tenth time she complained to me I told her to knock it off or I would tell her dad she's dating a guy at the Temple. That shut her up.

Thank the Force that Ben was there. He totally made the trip bearable.

There were some funny parts of the vacation, like when a bunch of birds started flying around my Aunt Mara's head. We think they were attracted the smell of her shampoo.

Ben and I spent time making fun of his dad's ugly shorts and new haircut. That man has no taste in clothing and I often wonder if his barber is a Kowakian Monkey Lizard with a bowl and a pair of scissors.

What was fun was huddling around the campfire at night and listening to our parents talk about the good old days…you know the time before I was born. Dad was sitting on a log with mom next to him. He had an arm draped around her waist and they were looking all sappy and in love. My Aunt Mara and Uncle Luke were looking the same. My heart clinched at the sight and I wondered if I would ever find anybody special like they did. I pushed those thoughts out of my head. I didn't want to get all bummed out about my break-up with Ema again. I was somewhat relieved when Hanna asked her mom and dad to tell her again how they met my parents.

"I met your Uncle Mark while in the medical bay of a Star Destroyer after we both were evacuated from Wayland," my aunt said.

"Back then I looked almost exactly like your father," my dad pointed out. "I had blond hair and blue eyes and was only a little taller than him. We think I was taken out of the cloning tube prior to reaching my full intended height. Your mother was unconscious when evacuated from the planet; therefore she didn't know your Uncle Han found me in a stasis cylinder after the fight with C'baoth. So when your mother saw me in the ship infirmary she thought I was your dad," My father turned to Aunt Mara and gave her a big smirk. "So she started hitting on me thinking I was Luke."

"What!" Mara yelled at my dad. "I was not hitting on you!"

My father snorted. "I know, you thought you were flirting with Luke." He turned to Hanna and winked. "She had a crush on your dad even back then."

Aunt Mara scowled at my father but didn't argue that point.

"Anyway she came into my room and was talking to me saying she wanted me as a friend and perhaps something more…" My dad chuckled as Aunt Mara reached over and smacked him on the shoulder. "Ouch!" he protested. "It's true."

Ben and I chuckled while the twins laughed in unison, which is creepy. They'd probably be great a synchronized swimming.

"So what were you thinking Uncle Mark?" Owen asked.

"I was thinking, _'Who is this good looking woman flirting with me'._ That was until she said that she once wanted to assassinate me. Then I thought ' _Who is this good looking crazy woman who escaped from the mental ward'_."

I laughed. I have heard parts of this story before and I've always found it amusing.

"You should have seen your mother jump when I walked into the room," Uncle Luke said to his children.

"She saw me lying in the hospital bed and Luke in the doorway," my dad continued. "She jumped about two meters away from us and said something like, _'Whawhawha whaaatt!'_ "

"I didn't say that!" Aunt Mara griped.

Uncle Luke grinned. "You're right. We can't repeat in front of the children what you actually said."

They laughed and talked about their early adventures for the next few hours and I learned a lot of things I never knew before. For example, I didn't know my dad was somewhat of a prankster when it came to Aunt Mara and Uncle Luke. He would tease them a lot during the time prior to them getting married. Dad supposedly acted as a matchmaker for the two.

I got to hear about my mother's captivity on Byss and Dad rescuing her while dressed like an Imperial Sentinel. I heard versions of the story before but I guess I never realized how dangerous the situation was. My father thought there was a slim chance he would leave Byss alive. In fact all of them thought it could become a suicide mission very easily…but they went anyway. They needed to kill the Emperor Reborn and save the galaxy once again.

I guess this camping trip wasn't a bad idea after all. It was good to see my parents having family time together and I haven't see Uncle Luke and Aunt Mara so relaxed and at ease. Usually the burdens of the galaxy are on Uncle Luke's shoulders…but for a few days there was just family and togetherness.

I'll remember this trip for a long while.

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**_Entry 68_ **

I went out with Nalli'ti the other day. We've been hanging around a lot. I don't think I would call it dating in the traditional sense. We are just enjoying each other's company. She doesn't want a relationship; I don't want a relationship…so it's all good.

I like her. She has a weird sense of humor. It is not exactly dark or dry or highbrow. I guess I'll call it quirky. I never know what she is going to say from one moment to the next. Maybe it's a Zeltron trait.

One thing I don't like is when she checks out other guys. I'm not saying that because I'm jealous. That's not it at all. What I don't like is when she checks them out and then asks me if I think the guy is hot. What? How would I know? Of course she doesn't believe me when I tell her men can't tell when other guys are attractive.

"You mean you don't think he's handsome?" she asked me one day while we were at a nightclub. She was pointing at some man about my age. He was tall, with dark hair and average build…but there is no way that I would know if he were attractive and I told her so.

"Oh please," she said incredulously. "Do you know when a guy is ugly?"

I shrugged. "Yeah, I know a lot of butt-ugly guys."

She looked at me with one eyebrow raised. "Well, if you know what an ugly man looks like then you should know what the least ugliest fellow would look like." She pointed over to the man in question. "Is he the most or least ugly guy you have ever seen?"

I frowned. She has a way of getting me to answer her questions. "Fine, he is not the ugliest man I have ever seen. I would put him in the bottom ten percent in the ugly scale." I took a sip of my drink. "Are you happy now?"

She gave me a smug smile. "Yes, I am."

I pointed a finger at her. "Now that I admitted he's not hideous don't start suggesting weird things like a love fest. I am not into group activities."

She laughed at me. She knows that despite my bluster I am not very adventurous when it comes to my love life. "No," she said. "If I wanted a threesome I would just ask the Skywalker twins."

I spit out my drink and stared at her slack jawed. "What?" I sputtered. "Did you ever ask them? Were you ever with Jak and Owen?"

"No!" She laughed again. "But I'm sure they'd be willing. You told me they do everything together."

I shook my head. "I'm sure that is one thing they don't do together."

She gave me a sultry look. "You never know. I once dated identical twins. You would be surprised what those two did together. One time we…"

"Stop," I interrupted her. I found out fairly quickly that Zeltrons would tell you just about every intimate detail of their life if you let them.

"What I was going to tell you wasn't bad, but I know how you hate it when I talk about my love life." She hesitated for a moment. "My cousin once dated conjoined twins."

"Knock it off!" I yelled and then reached over and tickled her along her ribs. That gets her every time.

"Stop it!" she laughed while slapping my hands away.

"It's the only way I know to stop you from talking."

She gave me a wicked grin. "You know another way."

I acted like I was put out, sighing deeply and rolling my eyes. "But I don't want to."

"Liar," she said as she reached her arms around my neck and pulled me to her lips. I ran my hands through her blue hair as I deepened the kiss. She's right; this was one sure way to keep her from talking. I sometimes think she tells me these creepy stories just to get that particular reaction.

Oh well, it works.

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**_Entry 69_ **

I was requested for a Jump Trooper mission. Well, actually my father was requested and he asked my master if he could bring me along. That is fine with me. I like working with my father.

.

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**_Entry 70_ **

My dad and I traveled with a Battalion of Jump Troopers to the planet Vannix. It is a Core world populated by humans. There were two insurgent groups fighting the planetary government for control. Usually the Galactic Alliance doesn't like to get involved in local planetary conflict unless there is unusual circumstances, such as genocide, the use of child soldiers, rape gangs or the use of weapons of mass destruction such as poison gas, nerve agents, biological weapons or the use of nuclear weaponry.

Sentient Rights investigators were sent out to the planet and reported that ethnic cleansing was occurring on the planet. One ethnic group was attempting to eradicate the presence of another ethnic group in the area. Mass graves were found. In response to these atrocities, the Galactic Alliance sent a brigade combat team, which consisted of infantry, Jump Troopers, field artillery, air and support battalions.

We were to assist the official government to crush the large guerrilla forces that have been overtly attacking the local populace and to try to root out the underground elements that were conducting espionage and sabotage.

Fighting irregular forces is especially difficult. With a conventional war we know who the enemy is. The foe is dressed in uniforms and has military bases that we can target. Guerrilla warfare is totally different. In most cases we are not at war with a country or planet where the conflict is occurring. We can't swoop in and bomb the enemy's position because they may be located within a community of innocent civilians. We instead have to go into a town and search out the enemy building to building. Any airstrikes have to be surgical. We need the help of the locals to maintain a good flow of intelligence.

The trouble is the GA military follows strict rules of engagement but the enemy often can care less if there is collateral damage during a battle. Unfortunately, that was the case on Vannix.

.

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**_Entry 71_ **

Our first few days weren't too bad. I was a little disappointed that I didn't get to do any combat jumps right away, but my dad said I shouldn't be too anxious, we'd be rushing up to death's door soon enough (I really didn't like the way he phrased that).

Instead of the armored jump trooper suit we wore camouflaged fatigues with light body armor. We looked just like other combat troopers except we had special shoulder epaulets signifying we were Jedi Assets. Uncle Luke had wanted us to wear our Jedi robes all the time while performing these duties, but the military didn't want that. They had nothing against the Jedi (at least not officially), but a few times my dad did deploy in his robes he had problems. The ground troopers didn't like being around him, referring to the Jedi robes as _'Basterbolt magnets'_. It was true. It seems that every hostile in the area liked the idea of killing a Jedi. I am not heart broken about wearing combat fatigues. Like my father, I am not overly fond of Jedi attire. If I am swinging a lightsaber I really don't need heavy robes whooshing around my body and getting in my way. The cloaks snag on nails and branches and they are impossible to keep clean while in the field. As far as I'm concerned the Jedi robes should only be used for noncombat functions.

My dad and I went to the Brigade headquarters to get a sitrep. Once there we discovered the forward operating base had come under nighttime sniper fire during the past week. The troopers sent out probe droids to search out the location of the sniper, but nothing came up in the droids' thermal sensors.

"They are using a slug thrower so we can't see a blaster bolt trail and they are probably wearing ambience suits," said the Colonel in charge. "It disguises their thermal signatures."

"Do you have counter-sniper operations up?" my dad asked.

The Colonel nodded. "In the next building over we have our snipers stationed. If you want to do some Jedi sniper magic, feel free to try."

My dad nodded and motioned for me to follow him. We went to where the snipers were located. Dad talked to a GA sniper named Gerof Llennoc.

"I think we can locate the sniper using the Force," my dad told the man.

"How would you know if the person you are shooting at is a friend or foe?" the sniper asked.

"Would a friendly be wearing an ambience suit?" my dad asked.

"Probably not." The sniper pointed to his weapon lying on the floor propped up by a tripod. There was a hole cut through the wall for the sniper to shoot through. "Have you ever used a Karpaki Fifty slug thrower?"

"I've trained with it. Is that an infrared scope on it?"

"Yeah."

My dad motioned to me. "We can help. My son and I will try to sense the sniper through the Force. If I don't see a heat signature through the scope where I sense the person's location we can assume we have an ambience suit wearer."

The sniper shrugged. "Be my guest. You can't do worse than I have tonight."

So that is what dad and I did that night. We turned down the lights in the room and my dad settled down behind the weapon. I was lying prone next to my dad with some nightview/infrared macrobinoculars. We reached out with the Force trying to sense anybody out in the distance, especially someone with evil intent. After an hour we felt somebody out in the forest. Dad looked through the infrared scope. "I don't see a heat signature. Can you sense them, Talon?"

I looked through the macrobinoculars. "I can sense him, but I don't see any movement."

"It's too dark for those goggles in the nightview mode and if they are wearing the suit the infrared is useless. Gerof, are you awake?" my dad said without looking up from the scope.

I heard the sniper crawl up to us. "Yeah."

"I have somebody out there. Sentient, most likely human or near human and no heat signature indicating he's probably in an ambience suit or cloak. Requesting permission to take the shot."

"Let me make sure we don't have friendlies out there. Do you have coordinates?"

My father gave him the scope coordinates and Gerof contacted his senior officer verifying that we weren't about to lay down friendly fire. After a few minutes he turned off the comlink. "We're clear. No friendlies in the area. Take the shot."

My father didn't say anything but I could feel him pull the Force to him as he concentrated on aiming the rifle. After what seemed like an eternity I heard the loud report of the slug thrower. It was almost deafening in the small room. I had switched my macrobinoculars onto infrared in a hope to see a blood trail. What I saw shocked me. Shortly after my dad fired the weapon there was a blossoming of heat from the area where we sensed the possible sniper. I wasn't exactly sure what I saw…it was like an explosion of infrared heat.

In the dim light I saw my father look up from the scope and turn to Gerof. "What type of slugs are these?"

"Explosive tipped," the sniper said softly.

My dad groaned. "I thought the GA wanted to restrict those slugs to equipment-only targets?"

"An ambience suit is equipment," the sniper said matter-of-factly.

"Kriff!" My father swore.

"What's wrong Dad?"

"That big expansion of heat was blood and flesh. Tomorrow we will probably find chunks of that sniper over a fifty meter radius." He got up. "I don't appreciate you putting me in this situation, Gerof. I follow GA rules of engagement." He tapped my leg with his boot. "Come on Talon."

I got up and we went to the headquarters where my father reported the incident. He was pretty hot…but we did get the sniper who killed five soldiers in the last week. I am not sure what to feel about the incident. It was true we used ammunition not approved for use on sentient beings, but I don't know how it would have been better if my dad put a conventional slug through the enemy's brain.

Dead was dead.


	19. Chapter 19

**_Entry 72_ **

The platoon we were working with went into a hot zone for a Grab-n-Dash. That's where we drop into an area where our soldiers are pinned down and help them evacuate or fall back. Dad and I were tasked to help evacuate soldiers who are unable to move on their own. Often they are pinned down with a lot of enemy crossfire. Because lightsabers are a great defense against blaster bolts we are an idea team to go in.

In my first Grab-n-Dash mission we went in to evacuate a squad from our own company. They were Jump Troopers who were pinned down with artillery and heavy blaster fire. Our armor is good, but not good enough to sustained prolonged blaster fire or point blank contact with explosives. Usually if a Jump Trooper was down you have to go in with a hover-stretcher. Unfortunately, hover-stretchers are not build for speed and it is an angonizingly slow process to evacuate a man out of a kill zone using that contraption. Unfortunately, most men cannot physically pick up and move an armored Jump Trooper (or JT) without assistance. The suit enhances the wearer's strength, but not so much that a JT can pulled a hundred kilo trooper wearing a seventy-five kilo armored suit off the battlefield…unless they can use the Force to levitate the wounded soldier.

And that is exactly what my father and I did one day. We dropped in to a firefight and would use one hand to deflect blasterbolts with our lightsabers while using the Force and our own muscles to pick up the wounded man. Normally the jet propulsion of our packs wouldn't generate enough lift to carry two armored men out of the area, but using the Force we could manage to bound out with a few Force and Jet Pack enhanced leaps.

We saved a few men that day, but not all of them. We would get them to a secure zone and call in the medic. My dad and I would help the medical personnel get the soldier's armor off for treatment. One time we lifted a breast and abdominal plate and realized the man's armor was perforated at the side by a blaster bolt. My stomach tightened by what I saw. His abdomen was like a bowl of blood and guts. One look and we knew there was little a field medic or med-droids could do and we weren't sure if the facilities on the Star Destroyer in orbit above could do anything either.

What made matters worse was my father knew the dying man. We got the helmet off to show a light skinned human with black hair and the darkest brown eyes I have ever seen. My father lifted his visor so the man could see his face. When he did, he smiled at my dad. "Mark, thanks for coming for me."

At least that is what I thought he said. He was choking on a lot of blood making speech difficult. We knelt over the wounded soldier up near his head while the medic did what he could with the wound in his midsection. I knew dad was trying to distract the man from his injury.

"Hey Maxx, It's been a few years," my dad managed to get the words out before he bit his lower lip in an effort to control his facial expression. I could see this was tearing him up. He motioned his head to me. "You probably don't recognize him, but this is my youngest son Talon."

I raised my face shield so he could see me. The man turned his head and I can tell his eyes weren't focusing, but he smiled anyway. "Your dad used to talk about you and your bother when we were in the field. It's nice to…owww!" The man grimaced in pain. He tried to lift his head to see his wound but didn't have the energy. He looked to my father. "I'm dying, aren't I?"

My dad closed his eyes. "I don't know Maxx. We'll do everything we can to help." Maxx cried out in pain again and my dad turned to the medic. "Can't you give him something for the pain?"

"I've given him the full amount authorized." The medic looked almost as upset as my father. "Anymore and it'll kill him."

My father nodded and then took off his gauntlet and laid a hand on Maxx's face. I could feel a swirling in the Force and I knew my father was trying to use it to deaden the pain. I took off my gloves and tried the same. "Are you going to do a healing technique, dad?"

My father nodded, but I could see in his eyes he had little hope. A trained healer like Cighal might be able to save the man long enough to get him into a full bacta bath, but we weren't trained healers. At least our attempts to reduce the pain appeared to be working. Maxx's face relaxed. "Thanks, Mark." He reached up and grabbed my dad's forearm. "Mark, please give a message to my wife, Jenny. Tell her I love her and the kids."

My dad made a funny noise and I realized he was trying not to cry. "I promise," he finally choked out. The man smiled and closed his eyes. We stayed with him until we could feel his Force signature gradually diminish until it was no more. My dad then wordlessly stood and walked away. I didn't follow. I knew he wanted time to grieve. I finished removing the man's armor before the medic and I placed him in a body bag.

Another Jump Trooper had seen the end of war.

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**_Entry 73_ **

Later my father told me about the man that died. His name was Maxx Raptitor. He was thirty-two years old and had been in the military for twelve years with nine of those years in the Jump Troopers. His had a wife named Jenny and two kids, a boy and a girl, ages six and four named Kyle and Shanna.

My father went on a number of missions with Maxx. Dad said he was a brave, kind and generous man and he wished I got to meet him before this mission…that he was a man worth meeting.

I wanted to record the above in my journal because these troopers sacrificed everything and they should never be forgotten.

I know I will never forget these men.

.

**_Entry 74_ **

The GA intel received information that the enemy was storing weapons and headquartered in the remote town of Skogen. So they had sent a company of ground troopers to the town to sweep the area for weapons and enemy combatants.

The town was the type we called DeRa hell. DeRa means Dense and Random. The homes are close together and built in no apparent pattern. The roads are winding and radiate out in irregular configuration. There were back alleys, dead end streets and all types of danger spots where ambushes could be set up. To make matters worse we were told there was an extensive maze of underground tunnels under the village that were used as emergency shelters during the planets many tornadoes and storms.

The company of GA ground troopers immediately came under fire not only by blaster fire, but by a mortar barrage, with the enemy showing no concern for the local civilians. The company was able to fall back and hunker down in a defensive position. That is when the Jump Troopers were called in as reinforcements.

Our job was to find the mortar teams. We didn't know if it was just one team or many, only that they were striking at will and then quickly moving to a new location. We dropped into the area where the mortars were last seen coming from. We encircled the area and had one platoon search the cordoned off zone while the other three platoons contained the area. My father and I accompanied the platoon doing the sweep. We were carrying heavy blasters and our lightsabers as we moved from building to building searching for the enemy.

We got halfway through the sweep when we started to take on enemy fire from the rooftops. Dad yelled to the platoon sergeant to cover him, he was going up to the roof. He then signaled for me to follow. We could have flown up to the roof, but we were sure they were expecting that. We hoped we could sneak up on them using the stairs, but they must have had a man guarding that approach and we immediately came under blaster fire. We ran up the stairs anyway. Dad is in the lead using his lightsaber to deflect blaster fire coming down the vertical shaft of the stairwell. The next thing I heard was the clunking sound of something metallic bouncing down the stairs.

"Thermal detonator!" My dad shouts. I look up and I can see the round explosive device rolling toward us. My dad and I are in armor, but not thick enough to survive a direct hit with this type of explosive.

"Force Bubble, Talon!" My dad calls out as he used the Force to halt the detonator's movement. I can then sense him pulling the Force around the explosive device. I concentrate on assisting my father. I remember my heart beating wildly while using every bit of concentration to envelope the deadly object. Within a few seconds the detonator exploded. I could see the Force bubble swell with the expansion of energy. I felt the pressure of the explosion pushing against the protective shield we created and I had to strain to maintain my Force grip. Just as I thought I couldn't hold on any longer my father raised both his hands and the bubble of explosive energy flew up the stairwell shaft and burst through the roof above. My dad and I press our bodies against the wall while using the Force to shield us from falling debris.

Once things stabilized we ran up the stairs and onto the roof. There were about six men on the roof blasting at us. Dad and I used our lightsabers to deflect the shots back to the shooters. Eventually the firing stopped and we approached the men lying on the ground. We checked for survivors, but there were none. Dad went over to a portable mortar system sitting on the roof and hacked it up with his lightsaber. Afterwards he got on his comlink. "The rooftop is clear." He turned off the communicator and looked up to me and opened his helmet shield so I could see his face. He has a wide smile. "You did great, Talon. I wouldn't have been able to contain the thermal detonator explosion without you."

I opened my helmet and smiled back. "Thanks." I really don't believe my father would have failed without me, but it is nice for him to say so.

"Come on, let's rejoin the platoon." We lowered our helmet shields and moved down to the street below.

We swept through the buildings and alleys with little resistance. Still it was nerve wracking because the enemy could be anyone. Our adversary lived among the local population.

I was following my father. He had his lightsaber blazing, but I had put away my lightsaber in exchange for my heavy blaster. Like my father, I don't like killing with a lightsaber. To be honest I don't like killing at all, but if I have to kill the enemy I rather do it with a blaster and not with a lightsaber.

My danger senses flared as we came under fire from somebody up ahead in the road. My father deflected the blasterbolts easily and the other members of the platoon concentrate their firepower on the shooter's position. I sensed someone coming from my right. I spun around and aimed my blaster and readied to shoot. I hesitated when I realize I was aiming at a young boy who was probably not older than seven or eight years old. As I lowered my blaster I heard a metallic clunk. I look down and saw a thermal detonator sitting next to my father's armored foot.

"Grenade!" I screamed as I attempted to create another Force bubble. My father looked at me and then down to where I was looking. He reached out with the Force and attempted to envelope the explosive…at that very moment the detonator went off.

The Force bubble held for a few seconds, but then our grip on the Force slipped and the explosion escaped from its confines. I remember flying through the air and landing hard against a wall.

I shook my head, trying to clear my mind. I heard the platoon leader calling the medic. I struggle to my feet and rushed to my father. What I saw made me sick to my stomach. My father was lying on the ground, his visor was open and I could see him grimace in pain. He perched himself up on his elbows and looked down at his feet. It was then that I noticed his right foot was gone and there was blood gushing from the wound.

The medic was frantically trying to remove his armor. I slid down on the ground next to him and attempted to assist. The soldier looked up to me. "We need to get the armor off to put on a tourniquet."

I nodded and pulled on the metallic latches but the heat of the blast fused them shut. I felt my father's armored gauntlet grab me by my arm. I looked down at him; his face was an expression of pain. "Use your lightsaber, Talon," he gasped.

"To cut off the armor?" I wasn't sure if I could do that without cutting him up also.

My father shook his head. "No, cut off my leg right above the wound."

"What?!"

"It will cauterize the wound," my dad said.

I looked at the medic wide-eyed. He nodded. "That should work."

I know it would work, but that doesn't make it any easier for me to do. This is my father. I don't even like using the lightsaber on my enemy, let alone my dad.

"Hurry, Talon!" My father urged me. I can see he is getting pale from blood loss.

I reluctantly took off my lightsaber and ignited it. The green glow of the saber reflected off my father's grey armor as I steadied myself for what I had to do. I lower the blade. It cut through the armor with some resistance. Once the blade touched his flesh it cut through quickly. I bit my lower lip as my father screamed. My hands were shaking as I finished the cut and then shut off the lightsaber.

The medic inspected the wound and then looked up to me. "The bleeding stopped." He put on an anti-pain patch on my father's face since he couldn't get to any other exposed flesh. I noticed the firefight was over and the platoon had set up protective positions around my dad. After a few minutes I heard the distinctive sound of an air transport. A jump trooper leapt down and landed next to us holding a hoverstretcher. I used the Force to levitate my father onto the stretcher and the evac-medic manned the carrier controls to levitate my father up to the air transport.

I intended to stay behind but the platoon sergeant came up to me putting his hand on my shoulder. "Go with him. I think we cleared this area."

I nodded and activated my jet pack and blasted up to the air ambulance transport.

I found a seat next to my father's stretcher and buckled in. My father turned to me and I could see him smile. "You're mother is going to kill me."

"I think Mom is the least of your worries."

Dad chuckled. "This is my worst injury. She's going to kill me and maybe your Uncle Luke." My dad's voice started slurring. I look up to the medic.

"The medication is kicking in," he explained. "It kills the pain, but makes people a little loopy. I wouldn't take to heart anything he says for the next half hour. People sometimes say crazy things or start slurring their words like they're drunk."

I nod my head. "Just relax Dad."

My father then starts patting his body with his gauntlet-covered hands. "Is my foot the only thing missing?"

"Yes Dad!"

My father put his hands over his crotch and smiled. "Good, all the important pieces are there still."

I shook my head in disbelief.

"Talon," my father said with some difficulty. "I love you."

"I know dad."

"I love your brother, but you were always my favorite."

I laugh. "I thought Jaden was your favorite. He was less trouble to you."

My father shook his head. "No, your brother is your momma's boy. You…you are so much like me. You act like me and you look just like me," my father mumbled.

The medic looked at my redheaded bearded dad and then at me with blond hair and blue eyes, then shrugged. I know what my dad meant. If he didn't dye his hair and eyes we would look just alike.

"Tell your mom that I love her." Dad said to me.

"Dad, you're not dying."

"I know, but I'll be in the bacta tank and unable to talk," my dad insisted.

"Okay, Dad. I'll tell her."

My dad started chuckling.

"What's so funny?"

"What's your Master going to say when she finds out you chopped my leg off with your lightsaber?"

"Dad! You told me to do it!"

"You are almost as bad a Jacen," my dad laughed.

"Dad!"

At that point the drugs must have kicked in all the way because my dad closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep.


	20. Chapter 20

**_Entry 75_ **

My dad was right. Mom was upset. Dad was evacuated to a GA Star Destroyer medical bay. My Uncle Luke and Aunt Mara gave Mom and my brother a lift to the ship aboard the _Jade Shadow_. My dad was still in the bacta tank when they got on board. Mom stayed by Dad's side and cried. This wasn't my dad's first dip in the bacta, but he never lost a limb before. I think this is tough for mom because usually dad is patched up and in working order before he comes home to see her. I think she was able to not think about the danger and live in a state of denial…but not this time. Dad would be in the tank for at least a week.

My Uncle Luke tried to comfort my mother and reassured her that once his cybernetic limb was created he would be as good as new.

She then turned to me and asked me what happened. I told her about the young boy and the thermal detonator.

"I tried to contain the blast using the Force…but I wasn't strong enough." Then for the first time since the incident I started to tear up and I started to wonder if I was the one to blame for my father's injury. If I had studied harder at the Academy could I have pulled off the containment of the blast like my father did earlier?

My Master must have sensed my change in mood and came up and put her arm around my shoulder and led me out of the medical ward.

"This is not your fault, Talon," she told me.

"I know," I said but it came out sounding anything but sincere.

My Aunt Mara frowned. "I don't think there is any apprentice at the Academy who could have done what you did. Without your help half the platoon, including your father and yourself would be dead."

I shook my head wondering if I should have done something different. "Maybe I should have used the Force to throw it away or I could have taken the lightsaber to chop it up…maybe I could have disabled it."

Her hand gave my shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "Don't beat yourself up with 'what-ifs'. If you threw the detonator somewhere…where would it have landed? Even if you shot it straight into the air the shrapnel could have come raining down on the civilian population. Also you didn't know when it would explode. As for chopping it up with the lightsaber…that might have worked but once again you didn't know how much time you had and the saber might have triggered the explosion anyway. You did the best thing under the circumstances. The fact that a thermal detonator exploded five centimeters from your father and he only lost a foot is a testimonial to your ability with the Force."

"I guess," I mumbled, not at all convinced. "I should have sensed the danger, though."

"Talon, I believe you didn't sense danger from the boy because he didn't know what he was throwing at you. The enemy used and endangered a child in order to outwit your Force senses. There was no evil intent coming from the child and therefore you didn't pick up the danger until you saw the detonator. I'd hate to say it, but I have seen this done before in other conflicts. Using children this way is a war crime and reprehensible. Luckily, your actions probably saved the youngling." My Aunt Mara gazed at me with a soft smile. "I'm proud of you. You did a wonderful job. Don't ever think otherwise."

She patted me on the shoulder and then went back to the medical ward. I didn't go back right away. It broke my heart to see my mother crying and my dad floating around in a bacta tank.

I sat down in the waiting room area and unclipped my lightsaber and stared at it for a long time. I constructed it when I was around twelve or thirteen years of age. I remember how excited I was to have my own lightsaber. I dreamt of the heroic feats and adventures I would have on missions. Never in my life did I think I would have to use it on my own father.

I turned the weapon over in my hands and wondered if this was going to be my life from now on. How many times will I see war, death, destruction and my mother crying beside a bacta tank?

The life of a Jedi is not as glamorous as the holo-shows make it out to be.

.

.

**_Entry 76_ **

Dad is out of the bacta tank. Mom gave him a big kiss and then she immediately pulled away gagging. I guess she forgot how bad bacta tasted. Ha! The medical technicians were talking about the cybernetic foot and ankle they are going to put on dad. After weighing him they realized the foot would have to be special made. Dad is as tall as a Wookiee and actually weighs more than Chewbacca. He would need a fortified cybernetic foot. Until the technicians could get one made they wanted to give dad a Wookiee cybernetic foot. HA!

Dad was not amused. They told him it would be over a month before his foot was special made and if he could use a temporary Wookiee foot for his physical therapy. Now I am not talking about a hairy foot. It is just the foot without the outer skin/hair, so it wouldn't be that bad. It probably would just be a little wider than his other foot. Dad refused though and asked for a conventional non-cybernetic prosthesis. It is basically a solid piece of foot-shaped plasteel. He was limping around and grousing about the false limb. Until his permanent replacement was constructed and fitted on him he was out of commission when it came to missions.

We're going home.

.

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**_Entry 77_ **

When I got home to Coruscant I met up with Nalli'ti. She was happy to see me at first, but then frowned. "You look different," she said to me.

I wasn't sure what she meant. I hadn't changed my appearance since I last seen her. "How so?"

She shrugged as she walked around me while gliding a caressing hand over my shoulders. "You don't have the same spark in your eyes."

I pulled her into my arms. "I just came back from combat Nalli. What do you expect?"

She gave me a light kiss on the lips and then a sad smiled. "You're right. I can't expect my lighthearted young man to come back the same way he left."

I grinned. "Give me some time to relax, decompress and I am sure that happy-go-lucky man will return. My father is able to pull it off."

She wrapped her arms around my neck and smiled. "How about a rubdown? I can work out the stress in your sore muscles and help you relax."

"I'm sure you can," I said with a playful smirk.

She is pretty good at relaxing me and I'm sure her method is much more pleasant than the Umgullian blob massage therapy that my mother raves about.

.

.

**_Entry 78_ **

My family and I were invited over to the local GA Jump Trooper garrison for a Combat Wing ceremony. The Combat Wing Badge is a way for Jump Troopers to show who has been in combat and who hasn't. After a successful tour in a combat zone a trooper qualifies for the distinguished badge. I became eligible for the award, but since I left the battlefield early due to my father's injury, the higher-ups waited until dad was out of bacta to conduct the ceremony. In addition to my award of the CWB my father was to be awarded the Medal of Sacrifice because of his severe injury. My dad has been injured multiple times in combat, but nothing severe enough to qualify for the award previously. Usually you have to have a horrible injury such as a loss of limb or internal injuries or traumatic brain trauma to qualify. The loss of a leg was enough to get him put in for the award. That is one medal I don't want to get.

My family and I reported to a big auditorium on the base. My dad and I were wearing a modified version of the GA dress uniform.

We get there and there is a short ceremony telling the audience about the battle. I was called up along with my mother and father who were to pin the Combat Wings on me. My mother pushed the metal pins through my jacket and my father was to place the metal backings on …instead he smirked and then looked up at the Captain running the ceremony. The officer gave my father the most evil looking grin and said, "You have the honors Jedi Tantiss."

My dad drew his hand back and then yelled out, "Blood wings!" He then punched me hard in the chest forcing the little metal spikes on the back of the badge into my skin. I tried to keep the look of shock off my face as the troopers in the audience gave a loud, "Hurrah!" I also heard a snicker from my brother and a horrified gasp from Nalli'ti who accompanied us to the ceremony.

My mother's hands flew to her mouth as she tried to suppress a shout of surprise. "Why did you do that?" she asked my father angrily.

My dad laughed. "It's a tradition." He gave me a wink. "I didn't want the boy to feel left out."

Great, I bet I am now bleeding all over my undershirt. I force a smile on my face. "It's okay, mom."

She doesn't look mollified and kept scowling at my dad. Finally the time came for my father to receive the Medal of Sacrifice. The Garrison Commander came over and presents the medal to my mother for her to pin my father. She repeats the pinning motion she did for me, but then slammed the medal pins forcefully into my father's chest.

He grimaced. "Kira, you don't do that for the Medal of Sacrifice!"

Mom makes a good show at looking horrified at her mistake. "I'm sorry, I thought that's how all the medals go on."

Ha! Mom is lying! She was doing a little payback for me and I think dad got a bargain. I know I'm going to have a bruise the size of my dad's palm on my chest for weeks to come. I am sure Mom, didn't do much damage…although it did look like she really put her weight into that punch.

Force, I love my mom! She doesn't take any crap from anybody, especially the men in the family.

Afterwards we had a nice reception. I went to the 'fresher to pry the badge out of my skin and slapped on a bacta patch. It was nice being about troopers again. All of us had a good time.

.

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**_Entry 79_ **

My dad got his cybernetic foot/calf attached a couple days ago. I was with my Master near Corellia participating in war games when it happened. It was basically a StealthX training mission. I'm a good pilot, but not even close to being the best. I prefer being on firm ground when fighting.

On the way back we were told my dad was in the Temple medical facility supposedly working with a Cybernetic therapist. The therapist was assigned to tune up the foot and look for problems. My Aunt Mara and I decided to go see him as soon as we landed our StealthX fighters in the Temple docking bay.

When we got to the clinic we didn't find him doing therapy, but in his infirmary room shaving his legs instead. I was a bit shocked and I know my Aunt laughed at the sight. My father was in shorts and standing with his leg propped up on the 'fresher sink in his room. His legs were lathered up and he was shaving with one of my mother's lady razors.

"What are you doing?" my Aunt asked with a smirk.

"I'm evening out my leg hair," he said like we were stupid for asking.

"Why?" I asked.

Dad pointed to his prosthetic. "It's hairless, but I have a hairy leg. Your mother and I go to the pool often. I don't want it to look like I shaved half my leg."

Aunt Mara snorted. "Ask for a cybernetic replacement with hair."

"No! Because I know they are going to give me a hairy Wookiee foot if I do," my dad shot back. "Those guys are practical jokers and they know I threw a fit when they suggested the temporary Wookiee foot."

"So you instead are going to shave your legs for the rest of your life?" my aunt asked.

My dad shrugged. "I'll just add it to my list of things to shave."

My aunt and I look at my bearded father in confusion. Eventually my Aunt Mara made a sound of disgust. "I'm not going to even go there," She said as she turned and walked out of the room.

My dad laughed. "I can't help it if I have good grooming habits."

I shook my head and left. I really hope he was talking about the hair on his chest. Never mind, I don't even want to think about this subject at all.

.

.

**_Entry 80_ **

Ben, Valin and I went out to celebrate Valin's birthday. We went to a tavern close to the Temple so we could simply walk back if any of us drank a little too much. I had never been to this particular nightclub. It was okay, but I like the _Pandering Predator_ better. This pub didn't seem as classy. I think what tipped me off was the squishy sound my boots made as I walked over the sticky, booze covered floor. We settled down in a corner booth and ordered some low-buzz drinks. After throwing back a few, Valin went to the 'fresher to ' _drain the lightsaber'_ as he so inelegantly phrases such things. As soon as he is out of hearing range I mumbled, "More like a shoto."

Ben laughed then teased me. "I wouldn't know, I'm not checking out his equipment." He gave me a wink. "How do you know he is packing a dagger and not a Force pike?"

I shrugged my shoulders. "Hanna told me." Opps…that is probably not something I should joke about. Insulting Ben's baby sister is guaranteed to get a rise out of him. As Ben stood from his seat, I immediately retracted my comment. "I'm joking! I'm joking!" I said as I raised my hands to ward off a possible punch to my shoulder…or my face.

Ben gave me a nasty look before he sat back down. "You better be."

"Valin wouldn't get near Hanna. He may be a lot of things," I said while making a scoffing noise. "But, he's not that stupid."

"Who's not that stupid?" Valin said as he arrived back to our table.

"Nothing," Ben said.

Valin didn't pursue the matter. He kept glancing back toward the bar with a curious look on his face. "I want to show you something," he said while motioning for us to follow. We got up and followed Valin to the end of the bar. He pointed to a Jedi Knight in full robes on the other side of the tavern. "Do you recognize that Knight?"

I squinted in the dimly lit, smoke filled room as I tried to get a good look at the man. He was probably in his early twenties, with long black hair tied back with a leather strap. He had a neatly trimmed goatee and what looked like an…eye patch?

"No, I've never seen him." I turned to Ben. "Have you?"

Ben shook his head. "No, could he be from the Ossus subtemple?"

"I was there last month and never seen this guy." Valin looked at us and grinned. "I think we got a JEFA."

I looked over to the man. "A Jedi Faker…right near the Temple?"

"Why not? Civilians would expect to see Jedi in the area," Valin explained. "And it looks like he is hitting on some Temple-yummies."

Ben shook his head. "You know we're not supposed to use that term. Don't let my mother hear you saying that."

Valin waved Ben off. "Come on, let's go see the new Jedi."

We sauntered over to talk to the imposter. None of us are wearing our robes, but we do have our lightsabers in concealed sheaths on our waists. Usually we only have the saber hanging from the belt and in full view when we are in full robes.

Valin came up to the man who was practically fondling the young lady sitting next to him and slapped a hand on his shoulder. "Wow, are you a Jedi Knight?"

Ben and I had to suppress our amusement. Valin was doing his best to play the star struck Jedi admirer.

The man turned and frowned at Valin, obviously irritated that he was interrupting his attempt at seduction. "Yeah, I'm a Jedi." He reached up and removed Valin's hand from his shoulder. "If you don't mind, I'm busy."

He turned back to the woman but Valin was only getting started. "Can you levitate something?"

The man shot Valin a deadly look. "I don't do tricks on demand."

"What Temple are you from?" Ben asked.

The man looked at Ben confused. "The temple here, of course."

"Ohhh…" Ben said. "You must be the new transfer from Ossus, my father told me bring you back to the temple if I saw you." At that point Ben pulled back his jacket revealing his lightsaber.

The man blanched when he saw the weapon. He looked up to Ben. "Who's your father?"

"The Grand Master." Ben held out his hand to shake. "I'm Ben Skywalker."

The man's eye went wide before he stood. "I can find the Temple myself." He turned to the lady he was entertaining. "I have to go, Jedi business."

The man quickly made it to the exit, but we were right on his heels. As we followed the man outside Valin pulls out is comlink, "Horn, here."

By the amusement I can sense rolling off of him I am fairly certain there isn't anybody on the other side of the comlink he held snug to his ear. Valin nodded a few times before he shut it down. "Hey wait up!" Valin yelled at the imposter. "I'm glad we found you. We just got called on a mission down on the lower levels. A turf war just broke out between warring gangs and we were told to go down and quell the fighting." Valin put a hand on the man's shoulder and started to lead him down a dark alley. "Come on we'll need all the help we can get."

The one-eyed phony shrugged out of Valin's grip and pulled off his eye patch revealing two perfectly good eyes. "Listen, I'm not a Jedi." He pulled the lightsaber off his belt. "This is just something I made in my father's metal shop. I don't want any trouble."

We all glared at him doing our best to look intimidating.

"You do know it is a crime to impersonate a Jedi?" Ben asked.

"I'm not trying to do anything illegal!"

Valin looked the man up and down with a scowl. "Take off the robes and leave the fake lightsaber and go home. If we see you doing this again we _will_ call the authorities."

The man quickly shed his Jedi outfit and ran off down the walkway. Valin gave us a wide grin. "I'm off."

"Where are you going?" Ben asked.

Valin gave us a wink. "I think there is a young lady inside lonely for some Jedi company." He didn't wait for us to respond. He was down the alley and back into the pub in record time. I had to shake my head. Why hasn't he got in any trouble when it comes to the ladies? I'm always in trouble, but Valin the Jedi Male Escort never gets in trouble.

I looked over to Ben. "I think we'd just be in his way. He probably wants privacy to unwrap his birthday present."

Ben gave a roll of his eyes. "Yeah, lets go home."

"Or…we can see if Niki and Nalli'ti are around."

Ben smiled enthusiastically. "That sounds like a better idea."

And it was a better idea. A much better idea. Ha!


	21. Chapter 21

**_Entry 81_ **

I found out that Tahiri is pregnant again. She's three months along. Stang! At this rate Tahiri and Anakin are going to have a dozen kids by the time they are forty. The only bad thing about Tahiri popping out grandchildren for Leia and Han is I think my mother is having grandchild-envy. Hopefully Jaden will get married and make some grandchildren for my mother. I am not ready to settle down.

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**_Entry 82_ **

It has been a few months since my last entry. I have been working on flying the StealthX. My Aunt Mara said I will keep practicing until I can beat my cousin Jaina in simulations, which means practice will never end for me. I have yet to get close to beating Jaina when it comes to piloting or the use of the lightsaber. I could Force shove her through a wall if I wanted to though. It appears my two strengths are moving things with the force and postcognition. Of course Jaina's strengths are piloting, stealth and lightsaber dueling. So she could probably sneak up and do a lightsaber lobotomy on me before I knew she was there.

.

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**_Entry 83_ **

I was over at my parents' house for dinner recently. While my mother was preparing the meal I was watching the holonet and a news report caught my eye. It was about the Induparan Crown Worlds. Queen Kaie Indupar had her baby almost a year ago and finally official photos of the Crown Prince were released. Of course I am not interested in the baby. What I am looking for is a glimpse of Ema. Okay, I know that is pathetic, but I still occasionally search the holonet for her and I feel guilty when I do. Nalli'ti is such a great friend and I almost feel like I am disrespecting her by doing Holonet searches for a past lover that dumped me. At least I stopped trying to contact Ema. I realized my actions at first were a bit stalker-like.

My mom said something to me so I pushed the mute button and paused the programming. "What mom?"

"I asked if you want Pkejj sauce on your steak?"

"Sure," I said.

My mom came out of the kitchen to look at the holonet projector. At the moment the picture was frozen on the image of the baby heir apparent. "Why are you looking at your baby holos?"

That caught me off guard. "What? I'm not. This is the Crown Prince of Indupar."

She gazed at the child for a long, long moment. "That is the child of Ema's sister?" My mother's voice took on a creepy tone and I could feel her unease through the Force.

"Yeah…"

She grabbed the remote control datapad and punched in some information splitting the holo image platform so it could hold two images side-by-side. Next to the Prince's image popped up a holo of another baby that looked identical. "That's you as a baby," my mother said. She turned to me with a furrowed brow. "Talon did you and the Queen…?" She trailed off.

"No! I never touched her." I pointed to the holo images. "I was told the late King looked a lot like me. Besides a DNA test was conducted and it showed the baby was the King's child."

She stared at the holos some more before she shrugged. "It is just an eerie resemblance, that's all."

I looked back at the holos and got a strange chill down my spine. The resemblance _was_ uncanny.

"What did the Queen name him?" My mother asked.

I grabbed the datapad and did a little research. "Marcus Odaj Indupar." As soon as the words tumbled from my mouth that chill I had been experiencing earlier turned ice cold. _Marcus?_ Was it a coincidence that the Prince's name was the same as my middle name? It could be that Ema recommended the name…but, if so, why? Was it a sign that Ema still had feelings for me?

"Marcus," my mother whispered. "It looks like you made quite an impression on the Queen."

I shrugged. "Mom, I know you are eager for grandchildren, but the DNA tests were conducted by two labs. I'm sorry, but this is another child that is definitely _not_ mine." I gave her a wink. "If you want I can find out if Zeltron/human hybrids are possible."

She scowled at me and gave me a light smack on the side of my head. "You better not make me a grandmother too soon. I know you are trying your best." She shook her head as she walked back to the kitchen. "I don't know where you get your wild ways. You father is a one-woman man."

I laughed. "I heard Uncle Luke had good luck with the ladies when he was a Rogue."

"That must be it…or you take after my brother Shon. He was a real ladies man before he married and settled down. Go tell your dad that the food is ready."

I turned off the holo and put it out of my mind. I can't go back about obsessing over Ema.

I don't need another broken heart.

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**_Entry 84_ **

I'm going out on another Jump Trooper mission. I was hoping that Dad would go with me, but my mother got all freaked out about dad and me being in the same combat zone together. I think she realized her husband and son could have very easily have died in the battle that took my dad's leg. My father is not my master so there is no real reason for him to accompany me. The trouble is my Master, Aunt Mara, can't come on jump missions with me since she is not jump trooper qualified.

Even if she was I don't think she would be welcome. She may be middle aged, but she is still a looker…not that I'm looking. But I think she would be a major distraction in the all male combat units that I am usually attached to.

After some discussion it was determined that I could go on a mission alone. It would be part of my Jedi trials. I think I might be able to get knighted within a year or so.

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**_Entry 85_ **

There was a change of plans. I was assigned to an Infantry ground unit. That's a disappointment. I wasn't attached to a Jump Trooper unit because we were on the planet Jabiim. The planet has an unstable electrical field that screws up the functioning of repulsor craft. They will work most of the time…until they don't work and fall out of the sky. So we are dirt-side and using vehicles with wheels. This wouldn't be too bad if it wasn't for the fact that it rains constantly on the planet and I mean constantly. The entire world is one giant mud hole. The population had constructed major sewer and underground canals to pull most of the water away from the city, but that doesn't help much.

We are looking for rebels that have been fighting over control over a newly found ore deposit. Prior to the Clone Wars Jabiim was a major producer of ore. During the time of the Empire the planet was mined extensively. When the ore ran out the Emperor decided those out-of-work miners are a waste of manpower. He promptly sent slave ships to enslave the population. The people who remained are a bit angry with the Empire and wary of any galactic governing body. Even the people we are here to help don't have much love for the GA military.

To make matters worse, the platoon I have been assigned to work with is led by a freshly commissioned Lieutenant right out of the GA Military Academy. Of course, being an officer and an Academy grad doesn't endear him to the platoon. They call Academy grads a bunch of conceited ring-knockers—which is a term coined because of the massively large gold Academy ring that the graduates wear and sometimes will clank on a desk to make people aware that they are graduates. _'Hey look at my big ring.'_

Normally I don't have any problems with officers, but this one doesn't believe in the Force. When my platoon sergeant told me this I was shocked. How can anybody not believe in the Force? I thought my sergeant was messing with me until I got to meet the Lieutenant.

The Platoon Sergeant poked his head into the Platoon Leader's command tent. "Lieutenant Lejes, Jedi Tantiss has reported for duty."

The lieutenant was sitting at a folding field desk looking at maps. When I entered he glared at me. "They are actually having you masquerading as a real soldier with uniform and all."

I was taken aback by the comment. "Sir, I'm a fully qualified Jump Trooper." Not that I have to tell him. A fabric version of my combat jump wings is sewn to the front of my uniform above the pocket.

He actually rolled his eyes. "Well, as you can see we are not a Jump Unit. I don't know why you were sent here."

"I was told that I was here to help you find the rebels."

He scowled at me. "Let me tell you right now. I don't believe in your religion. As far as I am concerned it is all tricks. I don't appreciate headquarters sending me a charlatan spoon-bender when I simply need more reinforcements and sensing equipment."

It was right about then that I wished Jedi were given the rank of General like they did in the clone wars. As it was, I didn't have any rank. I was an asset. I would help the platoon in any way possible and was prohibited from interfering with the chain of command. I simply smiled and said, "Yes, sir. What would you have me do?"

He made a shooing motion with his hand. "Go with the platoon sergeant and stay the hell out of the way."

"Yes sir." I turned and started to walk away.

"Didn't you forget something?" The lieutenant called out.

I knew what he was expecting, but he wasn't going to get it from me. "Are you referring to a salute sir?" I shook my head. "The rank structure does not require it of me. I am neither an officer, non-commissioned or enlisted soldier. I am an asset and not required or expected to salute." I paused for a moment. "Is there anything else sir?"

"Get out," he growled at me.

I left the tent and when I was out of sight I gave him my special ' _Kriff you'_ salute.

.

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**_Entry 86_ **

My platoon went on foot patrol to search and clear buildings in in an old abandoned industrial area. So far we haven't seen any sign of the enemy. We know they have to be either within or near the city because they have been doing nighttime commando strikes on foot.

After hours of walking, we got a break to eat dinner. We sat down in a defendable area of the industrial park and broke out our dehydrated rations. After about fifteen minutes a young man about my age came up and squatted on his heels in front of me, which was a bit of a surprise since most of the soldiers in this unit treat me like I have the rakghoul plague. At least when I am in a Jump Trooper unit they treat me like a brother. They see me as a JT first and a Jedi second.

The man was a dark haired, tanned human with teeth stained from chewing Radni roots. Because smoking cigarras is taboo while in the field many of the men opt for chewing the rancid tasting root. It is a stimulant that supposedly wakes you up and gets your heart beating.

Unfortunately it is highly addictive and gross. The men are always spitting on the ground or in old cans or bottles they find. I can see from the man's rank and nametag on his uniform that this is Corporal Jotsen. "Can I join you?" he asked. The words were a bit mumbled because of a huge piece of chew he had shoved in his right cheek.

"Sure, pull up some dirt…or I guess I should say mud."

He smiled and flopped down on the wet ground next to me. "So you're a Jedi. What's that like?"

I shrugged. "It's like being a soldier but with a lightsaber."

He snickered as he brought a clear bottle up to his mouth and spit brown liquid into it.

"Have you been with the platoon long?" I asked.

The man nodded. "A year now with this company. I have a total of three years in the GA Infantry. It beats fighting for scraps on my homeworld of Radeon. It's a dirtball planet in the Lambda system, mid-rim. It's an ore planet like this, but dry. When the ore ran out the people with any money left and the rest of us stayed and tried to scrape out a living by farming. Miners make lousy farmers."

I took a bite of my dinner, which consisted of a rehydrated meat patty. After I forced down the foul food I gave him a questioning look. "Do you believe in the Force?"

He shrugged. "I guess so. I'm not sure what it is, but I know Jedi can use it."

"I just can't understand how your lieutenant doesn't believe."

He spit in the bottle again and smiled his brown stained teeth at me. "He don't wanna believe. It means you're better than him and that won't do."

I gave him a nod. That made more sense than not believing something that was so obvious.

"I notice most of the men avoid me. Why are you different?"

Jotsen snickered. "Morbid curiosity. Most of these guys don't trust Jedi because they think you can read their mind and make them do stuff they don't want. We watch the holos. It's scary to be around someone who's like a wizard. Also most of us grew up with our grandmothers telling us about the purge and how the Jedi tried to take over government and had to be killed."

I scoffed. "I hope you know that was not true. It was the Emperor's propaganda. He needed to get rid of the Jedi so he could rule."

"He was already ruling. Don't see why he needed to kill the Jedi."

I shook my head. "He was Sith."

Jotsen gave me a toothy grin. "Force user, right?"

I nodded.

"Another reason not to trust Force users." He then chuckled and spit.

I shrugged noncommittally. I've heard this argument before…from my own father. Dad is a reluctant Jedi. He doesn't think anybody should have so much power. "So you are not scared about Jedi Mind Tricks?" I asked with a chuckle.

He shook his head. "Nah, the platoon sergeant says I'm a brain dead kriff. I figure it's hard to influence lifeless gray matter."

I laughed at his self-disparaging joke.

"All right ladies!" the platoon sergeant called out. "Pack it up and lets get back to patrol."

We got up and continued searching and clearing buildings. I don't like working in this type of environment. There are so many places for the enemy to hide. The streets are lined with abandoned wheeled vehicles. There are also tall manufacturing buildings with towering smoke stacks all around us. The place was abandoned decades ago, so at least we don't have to deal with civilians walking around.

The Lieutenant sent out ground probe droids with sensors to look for the enemy. Since repulsors are not very effective we have old-fashioned battery operated micro-helicopters with holocams and Infrared sensors flying around as scouts and looking for snipers.

Even though the platoon leader doesn't believe in the Force, I am stretching out with my senses trying to find the enemy. Suddenly I felt the presence of sentients up ahead. There were dozens…no, more than that. There were too many for me to count.

I signaled to the Platoon Sergeant. "Sergeant, I sense people up ahead and they don't feel friendly. I think we found our rebels."

The Sergeant signaled for the platoon to stop. Of course the Lieutenant ran over to his NCO to see what the problem was.

"The Jedi said there are soldiers up ahead."

The officer gave me a disbelieving look. "Nothing is showing up on our sensors."

"I can sense them approaching. Perhaps they are in the tunnels."

The platoon leader shook his head. "I put infrared sensing droids down below. They're coming up empty." He then signaled for the platoon to continue. I stood there transfixed in shock. Did that lieutenant just totally ignore me?

"But Sir…"

That was all I got out before he swung around and got into my face. "Don't you dare correct me or challenge my authority in front of my men or I'll make sure you never work with the GA military again."

I heaved a sigh. "Yes, sir."

The Lieutenant turned and ordered the men forward.

Corporal Jotsen came up next to me and spit on the ground. "Something Jedi?"

I nodded. "Yeah, there's something ahead. Stay sharp." I pulled out my lightsaber, but don't ignite it. I don't want to give the Lieutenant a fit.

The corporal next to me grinned. "I'm staying next to you Jedi. I don't have a lack of faith like the LT does."

I smiled. "Thanks."

Right then all hell broke loose. The enemy came out of hiding and surprise-surprise, they are wearing ambience and mimetic suits to hide themselves from sensors. Ambience suits hide your Infrared body heat signature and mimetic suits can hide your IR sig and make you virtually invisible to visual holocam sensors.

The enemy came pouring out of tunnel openings and buildings and advanced on us with blasters blazing. We start taking fire from rooftop snipers probably wearing mimetic suits also. By now I have my lightsaber ignited and trying to keep the blasterbolts off my platoon while they scrambled for cover.

Behind me I heard the corporal yell, "Oh kriff it looks like an entire company of men." He had his blaster on full automatic and was sending a steady stream of shots toward the enemy.

The sun had set, but in the dim light I could make out a hundred ambience-suited gunmen running like crazed maniacs toward us.

I can hear the Lieutenant swearing and calling for fire support and reinforcements, but I knew there was no time.

"Cover me!" I called out to Jotsen.

"Got it." He continued to fire at the approaching rebels.

I ducked behind a vehicle, shut down my saber and clipped it to my belt. I then closed my eyes and drew the Force toward me. I then stood up and made a clapping motion with my hands in front of me. When my palms snapped together the large trucks and vehicles parked on the both sides of the road lifted up and slammed together on the approaching enemy. They were squashed like a fly between the pages of an old-fashioned flimsi novel. I then drew my hands up toward the towering smokestacks and then made a pulling motion like I was yanking on an invisible rope. The giant duracrete flues crumbled and fell to the street where the enemy was still advancing.

There was a loud crash followed by an eerie silence. The quiet lasted a second or two before we could hear the moans and screams of the wounded enemy.

As the dust settled I could see a stream of fluid trickled out of the pile of rubble, mostly fuel from the old abandoned factory vehicles, but I knew there was also blood…a lot of blood. The lieutenant turned and looked at me and I could feel abject fear radiating from him. The same was true with most of the men in the platoon who turned to me with jaws slack and eyes wide.

Finally the platoon sergeant broke the silence. "You dumb-kriffs act like you never saw a Jedi Knight Holofilm before. Killing the enemy is what these spooks do. So pull your thumbs out of your exhaust ports and get moving. We'll let the engineers and medics deal with this pile of goo!"

The platoon regrouped and provided security until reinforcements arrived. We then continued on our patrol mission, searching and picking off any enemy we could find. I could constantly feel the eyes of my comrades on me. There was a mixture of awe and fear projecting off of them.

Corporal Jotsen came up next to me. "Thanks for saving our skin back there," he said before he spit out a stream of brown root juice. "I think you have the LT spooked. He'll probably get you transferred. So I want to thank you while I can."

"You're welcome," I said to Jotsen. "Do you really think he'll get rid of me after I saved his life?"

Jotsen chuckled. "You kidding? Did you see the look on his face after you did your magic trick? If our rations didn't constipate us so much he would have dropped a brick right then and there."

I gave an amused snort.

It turns out Corporal Jotsen was correct. Lieutenant Lejes had me out of his platoon as soon as possible. He got the Company Commander (another Academy Grad) to send me to an Intelligence Company saying my talents were wasted in a line platoon.

That was all right with me. Intel soldiers are usually a little less superstitious and maybe they won't treat me like a creepy freak of nature.


	22. Chapter 22

**_Entry 87_ **

Now that I'm in an Intel unit I'm wondering if they are ever going to let me go home. My tour was supposed to be around a month in duration, but then I let it slip that I had postcognitive abilities. So now they are having me handle enemy belongings to see if I can glean anything from the objects. They also brought me to places where they knew the enemy once was headquartered. I have images flash into my head. I can sometimes tell the Intelligence guys where the enemy decided to move. Once I was able to see an image of a planning session for an upcoming raid. We were able to foil at least one attack that way. Because of this success they requested an extension of my tour from my Master, which she obvious approved because I am now on month two of this assignment.

One nice thing about Intel is there are women in the unit. I get along fine with the ladies. Whereas male soldiers sometimes have a problem with me being a Jedi (I think it is an ego thing), women don't have the same difficulty. They find Jedi fascinating. I am very popular with the female soldiers. Not that I am doing anything with them but socializing. I told them I have a girl back home. I know that Nalli'ti could care less if I had sex with other women. She's a Zeltron and they don't believe in monogamy…but I'm not a Zeltron. It would bother me. I am too much like my dad in that respect.

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**_Entry 88_ **

I have spent over four months on Jabiim working with Intelligence. The mission is winding down. I am more than ready to go home. I think it only stopped raining for one day during the entire time that I have been here. They should export water to Tatooine because they have plenty of it.

Force I miss Nalli'ti. I tried to send her messages whenever I could, but it is difficult while in the field. She probably found another boyfriend by now. I swear if Valin touched her I will be royally pissed. Of course, Ben would have probably punched him for me if he did. Ha!

.

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**_Entry 89_ **

I arrived back home after being gone for almost five months. My mom was crying upon my return. She missed me. I'm sure dad missed me also, but he is not one to gush. He slapped me on the back and said his Army buddies told him about my work on Jabiim. "You brought a building down on a division of rebels I was told!" His chest was puffed out all proud.

I don't know how these numbers get exaggerated. "I think it was closer to a company sized attack force and I just pulled down some smoke stacks on the group."

"Good enough," my dad said with a grin. "You mom has a welcome home surprise for you."

A sinking feeling came over me. I spent almost five months on a planet that rained constantly. Knowing my mother she probably planned a trip to some exotic rainforest. I was pleasantly surprised to discover she baked me my favorite chocolate cookies. They were warm and gooey, just the way I like them.

It's nice being home.

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**_Entry 90_ **

My homecoming with Nalli'ti was wonderful. She said she missed me terribly. She reassured me that Valin never hit up on her…but she did ask me if I mentioned her little joke about dating twins to the Skywalkers.

"I may have mentioned it to Ben, why?"

She gave me a knowing smirk. "Your identical twin cousins bumped into me while I was out at a dance club with some girlfriends. I could swear they were flirting with me."

"What?" I said sharply as my jaw tightened.

Nalli'ti laughed. "I think their older brother put them up to it because once I shooed them away they slunk back to their table where I saw Ben and Niki sitting and laughing hysterically.

I shook my head. That sounds like a joke Ben would pull on his brothers.

She smiled and wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled me close to her until our noses were touching. "I don't think the twins knew I was dating you, so don't be upset with them." She leaned in and kissed me.

She made my homecoming so, so sweet—sweeter than chocolate cookies. Still, I am going to harass my cousins about hitting on my girl.

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**_Entry 91_ **

I saw Owen and Jak at the Temple today. I yelled at them to wait up. As I strode up to them I could see the color draining from their faces. "I heard you two were flirting with my girlfriend when I was gone!"

The twins took an anxious step backwards as they shook their heads. "We didn't know she was your girlfriend, Talon," said one of the twins. I think it was Owen.

"Ben was pranking us," Jak explained. "He said the Zeltron at the bar was eyeing us and we should go over and say 'Hi'."

"All we did was try to start a conversation, but she shut us down."

"Yeah," said Jak. "She said she was already dating the most handsome Jedi in the Temple."

"We thought she meant Jacen, so we beat feet out of there."

"What?!" I said shocked. "You thought she was referring to Jacen?!" I took a step toward them. "If I wasn't angry before, I sure am now!"

"Sorry Talon," they chuckled. "We have a class to get to." Jak said before the two hurriedly turned and got away from me as fast as they could.

This is proof-positive that guys can't tell if other men are handsome. I tried to explain this to Nalli'ti, but she didn't believe me. The twins obviously have that problem, because I am a lot better looking than Jacen.

.

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**_Entry 92_ **

Tahiri had her baby. This time it is a little girl they named Darsha. She is bald, toothless and cries a lot, but I have to admit, she is cute. Jos doesn't look too happy about the new addition to the family. I am sure Jaden felt the same way when I was born.

We had a big family gathering at my parents' restaurant in celebration of the birth. All of the Solo, Tantiss and Skywalker family members were there, with the exception of Jacen. Uncle Han said he went off on some Force-knowledge journey. I don't know what that's all about. In fact, nobody knows what that's about. He was acting secretively in the months prior to his departure.

At least we got most of the family together. It's rare for all of us cousins to be on planet at the same time. Jaina, Anakin and Ben are often off Coruscant on Jedi Knight missions. And the Skywalker twins and teenage Hanna are busy training with their Jedi Masters all over the galaxy. Tahiri is still working toward her knighthood, but having babies has slowed her down in that respect. She is very good with the kids and I honestly think she would rather be home with the younglings than running off on Jedi business. I think that is a good thing. My mother started working half days at the restaurant when Jaden and I were born and she kept it that way until we started school. Dad was gone a lot so it was nice to have one parent at home most of the time.

Anakin and Tahiri look so incredibly happy with their children. I know I always complained about their lovey-dovey sappiness during their courtship, but I'm glad everything is working out for them.

.

.

**_Entry 93_ **

I am getting very close to knighthood. My father once told me he usually works with the GA military for only five or six weeks total each year. I have worked as a Jedi asset for over six months this year alone. I have been lucky when it comes to injuries. The few times I have been injured I was patched up and back to work within days.

My father has gotten used to his cybernetic leg and is going off on missions again (although I think Mom would rather to have him stay home and teach). Once we ended up serving with two different units, but on the same battlefield. Sometimes the senior officers get us confused when talking about us. So they have taken to calling my dad _The Elder Tantiss_ or _Red Tantiss_. And me…well, I have been told I am sometimes referred to as _Spook Junior_. Since my one and only deployment with ground infantry, I have been assigned almost exclusively to Jump Trooper or Intel units. I prefer working with the Jump Troopers. There is a brotherhood among the men that I like.

Everything was going so well, but unfortunately, things can never go smoothly for me for very long. It is my fate in life. A hydrospanner got thrown into the gears when Ben came back from an assignment. He had gone to a security conference as part of his Jedi Sentinel training. There he met with representatives of security companies who designed guard droids, perimeter intrusion detection systems, holocams and every possible security product available. While there Ben came in contact with security personal from all over the galaxy, including guards for Hapan nobility, members of Galactic Alliance Guard, and royal guards for the Crown Worlds of Indupar.

The security personal from Indupar told Ben something that bothered him greatly and he immediately looked me up upon his return. He came to my quarters at the Temple to talk to me. I was happy to see him, but the look on his face let me know there was a problem.

"Talon, can I talk to you?"

I invited him in and we sat down in the living area of my quarters. Ben looked around. "Is your brother home?"

I shook my head. "He's interning at the Temple infirmary."

"Good," Ben said as he fidgeted in his seat. "Talon, I don't know if this means anything, but I talked to guards to Queen Kaie of Indupar."

I immediately stiffened. I was sure this had something to do with Ema. I had finally got over her and I don't need anything to rehash the pain. "And?"

Ben looked down at the floor nervously. "The Prince, Prince Marcus, I was told he is a Force-user."

I looked at him blankly. "So?"

Ben blew out a frustrated breath. "Have you seen the boy?"

I shrugged. "Yeah, I know he looks like me, but I looked like the King." I shook my head. "Ben, my mother already freaked out about the resemblance, but you know yourself that Queen Kaie was carrying the son of the King."

"I know…it's just that…well, you know that Ema is a stand-in for the queen for her safety. I was wondering if another child is acting as the body double for the Prince."

My breath arrested in my lungs. "What?"

"Could Ema have been pregnant when she left? Were you using male repress meds?"

"I was nineteen, what do you think? She told me she was on repress meds." I shook my head. "Two non-force-users can have Force sensitive children."

"True." Ben ran his hands over his trousers nervously. "The only reason I mentioned it was because when I was told that little bit of information I just got a strange feeling. I don't know if it was the Force whispering to me or not."

I don't remember Ben leaving my apartment. My mind was racing. I remember how my brother told me babies have a genetic predisposition to look like their father, and Prince Marcus was a dead ringer for me when I was a boy. Then the choice of his given name was also curious. Why name him Marcus? Ema knew that was my middle name. And why did she suddenly dump me when she arrived back to her homeworld? Did she know that when I found out she was pregnant I wouldn't keep away…that I would give up everything… becoming a Jedi Knight, going to college and anything else to be with her and my child. Did she hide her pregnancy to keep me from doing that?

Did I have a child who was now being used as a body double for the real prince? Did I have a son being used as blaster-bait?

I felt sick and I knew I needed to get a hold of Ema.


	23. Chapter 23

**_Entry 94_ **

I sent a message to Ema asking to talk, but received no response. That wasn't a surprise. She has completely ignored me since she sent her heartbreaking _'Dear Talon, I'm dumping you'_ text message. Why should now be different? This means I need to get somebody else to contact her and send a message she won't automatically delete without reading.

I needed to talk to Ben.

Although he's a fully fledged Jedi Knight he opted to continue living at his parents' apartment. Perhaps I could persuade him to send a message to Ema and make it look like it came from…an official Temple source…perhaps from the Grand Master himself. I would have to make the message cryptic, but give enough information to let her know I suspect something about her and the baby.

.

.

**_Entry 95_ **

I talked to Ben and he agreed to help.

"What do you want me to write in the message?" Ben asked as he sat in front of his father's subspace transceiver located in the Grand Master's home office.

"How about something like. ' _I discovered some interesting information about a Force-user within the kingdom. I would like to make arrangements to talk privately. The sleemo holonet reporters are always writing stories about me. I would hate them to hear the rumors I have heard. Please contact me.'_

Ben frowned. "That sounds like a threat."

I gave a frustrated sigh. "I know, but what can I do?"

He nodded as he activated his father's transceiver and typed out the message. He looked back to me. "Are you sure about this?"

I nodded and Ben pushed the send button. Now all I can do is wait.

.

.

**_Entry 96_ **

Ema contacted me the next day. My stomach dropped when I saw her face. She was still as beautiful as I remembered. Her holonet image stared at me, her face a mixture of regret and panic. "Talon," her voice was hoarse and soft.

"Ema," my voice was equally strained.

"I will make arrangements for you to come to Indupar. We need to talk privately. Come alone."

I shook my head. I wasn't sure what the situation was on Indupar or the reason for the intense secrecy, but I didn't feel right about going alone. "I'll come with Ben. He knows everything anyway. We'll make it an official visit…on the books."

She gazed at me sadly. "You don't trust me." She averted her eyes. "I don't blame you. That'll be fine. Put in a flight plan, it will be approved."

I bit my lower lip in frustration. I needed to end this conversation before I lost control. "You'll be hearing from me soon." I then turned off the transceiver.

.

.

**_Entry 97_ **

When Ben and I arrived to Indupar a man in a military dress uniform met us at the docking bay. Ben and I had opted to arrive in full Jedi robes to make the visit look as official as possible. The officer smiled amiably as he offered his hand in greeting. "Good afternoon Jedi Skywalker, Jedi Tantiss. I am Captain Dentti, Executive Officer of her Highnesses personal guard. I will escort you to the palace."

We shook his hand and then piled into an airspeeder and were quickly whisked off into the skylanes. I was barely cognizant of the cityscape rushing by as we neared the palace. All I could feel at that moment was a dark knot of nausea growing in my stomach.

"Hey," Ben said as he put his hand on my shoulder. "You alright?"

I didn't dare talk. I didn't trust my own voice. I simply shook my head.

"I got your back." Ben gave my shoulder a squeeze.

We sat silently in the back of the airspeeder as the Captain piloted the craft to a large eloquent building that looked like a combination of palace and government offices. We landed in what looked like a personal landing bay. The landing pad had a number of luxury yachts inside, one I recognized at the ship that had transported Ema and the Queen to Coruscant so many years ago.

"Here we are gentlemen," the captain said nonchalantly. Obviously he had no idea why I was here or any indication of what severe mental pain I was currently enduring. He climbed out of the craft as Ben and I debarked. "The Queen's sister asked me to escort you to her private meeting room. So if you would follow me." The man turned and marched off down the hall as Ben and I followed close behind. He took us down a maze of hallways and turbolifts until we finally arrived to a large ornate wooden door that he held open for us.

We entered a large room with an equally large conference table in the center. At the end of the table sat Ema Aiti, the woman I loved and lost. When I saw her the air swooshed out of my lungs like I had been hit in the gut. She didn't remain unaffected either. Her face turned pale and her mouth tightened to a thin line. I didn't ask to be seated. I pulled out a chair and sat before my legs gave out. Seeing her again made all the pain of the breakup resurface and the bitter agony that welled up inside me was almost crippling.

"Talon," I heard Ben's voice, but he sounded distant through the fog of my anguish. "Are you okay?"

"Yes," I struggled to talk. "Can you give us a few minutes alone?"

"Captain," Ema said to the officer that escorted us to the room. "Can you show Jedi Skywalker to the Seer's chambers. They requested an audience with him."

I looked to Ben nervously, not knowing if this was some scheme to separate us. I don't know why I am acting all paranoid, but the intense anxiety I felt coming from Ema through the Force put me on edge. Ben looked at Ema for a long moment, probably trying to sense duplicity on her part and eventually he nodded. "Of course, I would love a chance to talk to them."

Ema sighed deeply as the two men left the room shutting the door behind them. "It is safe to talk here. I assume you have many questions."

Anger welled up inside me. "Yes, I think that is an understatement." I took a couple deep breaths and simply asked what I came here for. "Am I a father? Were you pregnant when you left Coruscant?"

She closed her eyes, her head down and pensive. "Yes."

The words hit me like a Force Pike to the gut. "Why didn't you tell me?"

She started to cry. "I wanted to but things became out of my control."

"So you are using my son as a decoy for the Prince, like you are for your sister?" I shook my head in amazement. "Everybody knows the queen has a double, it's not a secret, why is my son forced into anonymity and used as bait for would-be assassins?"

"I wish it was that simple Talon, but it's not." Her voice took on an edge of despair.

"Then explain this to me?"

"My sister miscarried on the way home," her voice dropped to a hoarse whisper. "At the same time I discovered I was pregnant."

"What?"

"We switched places until the baby was born. Then Kaie returned to her royal duties. I couldn't tell you. It can never be known."

I sat back in my chair stunned. "You decided to break up with me and take away my son because your sister wanted to remain on the throne?" I looked away in disgust.

"Talon…" She started to say something but I cut her off.

"Shavit!" I shouted as I slammed my fist down on the table. "Ema, when you left me I never _ever_ thought it possible to experience more emotional pain in my life, but you _just_ proved me wrong. You have crushed me once more. You've taken my kriff'n heart out and squashed it under your heel. And worst of all, you've taken from me a son. My parents are without a grandson!"

"Damn it Talon! Do you think this is easy for me?" Her voice rose to a high pitch. "The H'drachi Seers tricked me _and_ my sister. They didn't tell us what was going to happen…what they predicted. My sister and I are pawns in their game. They knew my sister would miscarry, they knew I would get pregnant and they knew my son would become King. They also knew if this didn't happen the Induparan Crown worlds would be thrown into chaos and millions would suffer." She stood and turned away from me. "Do you think I am so vain and enamored of the trappings of living in a royal palace that I would give up the man I loved and a child of ours…for money or prestige!"

I am still very angry with her, but the pain in her voice and the anguish I felt flowing through the Force had me struggling to maintain my fury. I felt physically weak and spiritually devastated. I put my head on the table and wrapped my arms over my head trying to shut out a galaxy that seemed determined to drive a lightsaber through his heart at every turn. I don't know how long I stayed that way. Time didn't have any meaning to me anymore. I was simply waiting for the ground to open up and swallow me whole. Eventually I felt small hands tentatively touch my shoulders.

"Talon, I am so sorry." She sat down in a seat next to me. I looked up to her and could see she was crying. "If it's discovered that Marcus is your son, my sister and I will be, at best, thrown in prison, at worst we will be executed. I don't know what would happen to Marcus."

"He could live with his father." I said acerbity.

She looked down. "You could probably make that happen. And I would deserve whatever punishment that is brought upon me."

I ran my hands through my hair in frustration and grief. "I won't do that to you…no matter how angry I am." I brought my hands down on the table and I could see they were trembling.

She gave me a small smile as she reached out and put her hand over mine. "Would you like to see your son? We can't tell him you are his father, but we can introduce you as a visiting Jedi."

I thought about it for a while, wondering if my fragile emotional condition would allow me to pull off the deception. Finally I gave her my answer. "Yes, I would like that."

.

.

**_Entry 98_ **

Ema had left me sitting alone in the conference room as she went to get our son. That horrible dark feeling in my gut felt like it was spreading up my chest so it could strangle my heart. I was completely lost and unsure what to think or feel. Most men my age would be either happy that they were a father or horrified at the obligation thrust upon them. All I felt was a cold hopelessness born out of my situation. I had a son who I couldn't help raise. My parents had a grandson they wouldn't know. This situation was kriff'd up on so many levels.

I stood when Ema entered the room with a toddler in her arms. Despite my despondent mood, I had to smile at the boy. He had a mop of hair that was just as blond and silky as his mothers and his eyes…he had my bright blue eyes. His cheeks were chubby with little dimples …just like I had at his age. Ema bounced the child in her arms. "Marcus, this is my friend Talon. He's a Jedi."

The little boy looked away shyly, burying his face against his mother's shoulder. "Marcus," Ema said softly. "Talon won't hurt you. He is a good friend of your mother's. Just say ' _hello'_."

"Don't want to." The little boy mumbled. Ema whispered to him words of encouragement and my son finally turned to me and waved.

I wanted to hold him. I just couldn't wrap my mind around the fact that this is my son. I have a child.

"Hey Marcus. How are you?"

I didn't expect an answer, but I was stumped as to what to say to a two-and-a half-year-old boy. I reached into my pocket and pulled out my small datapad. I sat down in my chair and activated a game on the device that I thought Marcus might like. It had colorful circles, squares and triangles. The player had to put three of a kind together to win. "Do you want to see a game?"

My son's face lit up when he saw the game. He held out his hands making a ' _give me'_ motion with his fingers. Ema put him down on the ground and allowed him to walk to me. I pulled him up on my lap as I handed him the datapad. He pounded on the device in a way that made me cringe at first, but then he started utilizing the touch screen like an expert gamer… albeit a game player with saliva drenched fingers. As I watched him put sticking fingerprints all over the device I remembered how I would laugh at Anakin when he complained about changing his son Jos' diapers or how his son flushed his comlink down the toilet. Back then I didn't envy Anakin and Tahiri…but I do now. _'I won't get those opportunities with Marcus'_ , I thought sadly. I bounced him on my knee and leaned over his shoulder so I could smell the scent of baby shampoo in his hair.

"Ball!" he squealed as more circles popped up on the screen.

"He's a smart kid." I looked up at Ema sadly. "Will I ever be part of his life?"

She took a seat next to me. "It's not up to me. If we did try to bring you in we would have to be very careful. Marcus couldn't know about you until he is old enough to keep a secret. His future lies in the balance…and the future of the Crown Worlds. This is so much bigger than the two of us. The seers see Marcus as a…"

"A what?"

She blew out a breath. "They see him as a powerful Force user. We've already seen him exhibit some Force abilities. He occasionally moves his toys around with the Force. I think it's by accident, but eventually he will notice cause and effect."

I smiled hopefully. "That means he will need to be trained. You would need a Jedi to train him."

She shook her head. "That is up to my sister… and Marcus. I don't care what the seers say about him being a Jedi, his destiny should be in his hands. He should decide if he wants to be a Jedi. It is bad enough that the throne is thrust upon him."

"I agree." I smiled when Marcus slapped my datapad again. "Jedi usually like to start training Force-strong children before the age of ten years of age, but a person can start at anytime. My uncle has taught adults who discovered their potential late in life."

Ema looked down. "Talon, until Marcus claims his throne we can't have you training him. We can't risk rumors starting. If the media gets holos of you and Marcus together, there may be questions. You of all people know how despicable the Holonet can be with gossip."

I groaned. "Yes, I am well aware what those sleemos are capable of doing." I ran a hand through my hair in thought. "At what age will he become King?"

"Twelve." She sighed heavily. "Until then it is best that you stay away…please. For his sake."

"That's almost ten years."

"Yes," she said softly. "Once he is declared King it will be next to impossible to oust him. Nobody has ever challenged a sitting Monarch." She looked down in thought before looking back forlornly. "Talon about us…I'm so sorry. I was crushed when the Seers told me I had to cut ties, but I had no choice. I was heartbroken." She paused and he could see tears fall from her eyes. "I see you've moved on and I am happy for you."

My brow creased in confusion. "What do you mean?"

She smiled softly. "I admit, I watch the holonet for glimpses of you. I saw you were dating a Zeltron."

"Oh," I muttered. "We're just friends."

She raised an eyebrow. "Friends with benefits I assume."

I shrugged. "She's Zeltron, that sort of goes with the territory. She'll be graduating from the university soon and then she'll go home. It's not a long term relationship." I shifted Marcus from my one knee to the other. The boy was heavy. He had the Tantiss solid build already. "After you left I was heartbroken. I swore I would never fall in love again."

Her shoulders slumped. "Please don't do that Talon. Our circumstances are extreme. You'll find somebody who will love you and stay in your life. I know you will."

I snorted. "How would you possibly know that?"

She hesitated to answer. "I asked the Seers if you would be happy and find love…and they said you would."

I smiled and looked deep into her eyes. "With you?"

"No." She shook her head. "We're not destined to be together. They told me that much. I'm sorry."

I sighed dejectedly. "Will you at least send me holos of Marcus? That shouldn't be too suspicious, especially when the transmission is encrypted. One friend updating another friend."

"I can do that."

There was a knock at the door and Ben poked his head in. "Can I come in?"

Ema motioned him inside. "Close the door behind you."

Ben shut the door and then turned and gazed at Marcus with a smile. "He's strong in the Force. I can tell."

"Like his father," Ema whispered.

I leaned down and gave my son a soft kiss on the top of his head and then stood, scooping him up in my arms. I stepped over to where Ema sat and placed him on her lap before I took a knee in front of her and gazed at her sadly. "Take good care of him, Ema. If you ever need my help or the help of the Jedi don't hesitate to call."

"I'll take good care of him."

"You promise to keep me updated?"

She nodded.

"Thank you," I stood and reluctantly pried my datapad from my son's little hands. He protested for a moment before Ema pulled a small toy out of her tunic pocket. The rattling toy immediately caught his attention. I didn't want to go, but I knew the longer I stayed, the harder it was going to be for me to finally leave. "I guess we should go before people get suspicious."

For a briefest moment I considered kissing her goodbye, but then thought better of it. There was no need to reopen old wounds. I turned to leave, but stopped. I unhooked my lightsaber and handed it to Ema. "When he is old enough, he should have a lightsaber. I want him to have mine."

She looked at the offered saber but then pushed it back to me. "I want you to give it to him yourself, when he's old enough."

"Okay," I said with a stiff nod before attaching the saber back on my belt. I turned to Ben. "Let's go home."

We opened the door and found Captain Dentti standing outside ready to bring us back to our ship. A thought came to mind and I turned back to Ema. "Before I leave, is it possible for me to see the Seers? I'd like to talk to them also."

Ema looked at Captain Dentti and then back to me. "I don't see why not. Can you please escort them to Seer's meditation chamber, Captain."

He gave her a cordial nod. "Of course." He turned to us. "Please follow me."

Ben and I weren't even out the door before a man dressed in a guard's uniform came jogging down the hallway. "Captain Dentii," the guard said as he came to a stop and saluted. "The Seers sent me to inform you that they are not to be disturbed."

I could tell the Captain was surprised that the Seers even knew we were coming. He looked back to Ema who simply shrugged her shoulders.

"Thank you," he said to the guard as he returned the salute. He then gave me a sheepish look. "I'm sorry about that. The Seers are a bit fickle. I never quite understood how they do what they do." He motioned with his hand down the hallway. "I'll escort you back to your shuttle."

I was disappointed, but not surprised. If the Seers could truly see the future, then they foresaw what I was going to do. At least I now know they're the real deal.

.

.

**_Entry 99_ **

We were escorted back to the shuttle and departed for Coruscant. As I watched Indupar disappear from view I wondered if and when I would ever return. For a moment I had the impulse to turn the ship around and go back, but I pushed down the urge. I knew I would be endangering my son if I did.

I was encouraged by the fact that I could possibly see my son once he was King. Unfortunately, I would miss all the formative years of his upbringing. When I see him again I'd be a total stranger (not that I'm not a stranger to him now). I don't know what Ema and Kaie are telling my son about his parentage, but I assume he thinks his father was the King who died prior to his birth. What is he going to think once he finds out the truth? Will he hate me for not being there for him? I can only hope he'll understand.

Ben was piloting the shuttle home. He inputted the coordinates into the navigation computer and pulled the controls to bring us into hyperspace. He then turned to me with a quizzical look on his face. "Why do you think the Seers would see me and not you?"

I smirked from where I sat in the copilot's chair. "Because they knew once I was in their meditation chamber I would try to use my post-cognitive abilities to figure out what they've been up to."

"That's smart of them." Ben nodded appreciatively. "They _are_ good."

"They are better than good. They are creating futures."

Ben gazed at me in confusion. "How's that?"

"The Seers sent Ema and Kaie to Coruscant and told the Queen to request Jedi protection because they knew I would fall for Ema and father a child. If they didn't send her, I doubt the Queen would have made the decision to come to Coruscant. Ema and Queen Kaie were not told the truth as to why they needed to leave Indupar."

"But the future is always in motion," Ben reminded me. "How can they influence the future?"

I threw my hands up. "I don't know, but it makes me wonder what else they did to influence the future." I looked over to Ben. "The King died suddenly, possibly suspiciously. They knew the Queen was pregnant and would miscarry. Don't you think they could have used that information to maybe…I don't know what they do with pregnant women in that situation…put her on bed rest or something?"

Ben frowned. "Do you think they had the King killed and allowed the Queen to miscarry, just to put Marcus on the throne? Why?"

"Maybe they need a Force-user as King." I shook my head in frustration. "None of this makes sense, unless there are things they can't stop and some things they can."

"Like shatterpoints?" Ben asked. "A point in time where a single action can splinter off the future into a completely different path. Do you think they can see the shatterpoints?"

"Possibly…," I mumbled as I remembered something my father once told me about shatterpoints.

When I grew quiet Ben became suspicious. "Okay, what aren't you telling me?"

"Nothing," I murmured. "It's just my dad has a weird theory about shatterpoints."

"Which is?"

I gave a soft exasperated groan. I really didn't want to reveal my father's neurotic fascination with clones and his bizarre theories about their effect on the future. Of course Ben trained with my dad for a decade…he probably knows his eccentricities just as well as I do.

"Well, you know how sensitive he is about being a clone and all that research did does on the clone wars and such." I paused for a moment in thought. "Anyway, because he's a clone created in a laboratory by a crazed dark Jedi he thinks he shouldn't exist in this galaxy. He believes he's an anomaly—an aberration of nature. Because of this he is believes he shouldn't be here, he thinks everything he does changes the future in some way. He believes he's a walking, talking shatterpoint. Of course, because we don't know what the future was supposed to be, we have no way of knowing if anything has changed. If Uncle Luke didn't save my dad on Wayland my father wouldn't have been on Byss to kill Palpatine. Does that mean we would we be part of the Empire now under the rule of an evil Sith Lord?"

Ben shuddered. "That would be bad. But what does this have to do with you and the Seers?"

"Dad thinks he shouldn't exist and therefore his sons shouldn't exist." I laughed at what I always believed was an irrational theory. "He thinks he fathered two more shatterpoints."

Ben scoffed. "Your dad's wrong. He belongs in our universe as much as anybody else. If his theory was true then the millions of clones created during the Clone War would have totally altered our intended future."

I grimaced. "You mean they possibly could have clouded the future so much that one Sith could order the execution of thousands of fully trained Jedi Knights without them suspecting a thing?"

Ben gave a dismissive snort. "If what you say is right, then Marcus shouldn't exist either. Did the Seers want a future-screwer-upper human of their own?"

I don't know," I said somewhat bemused. "I just know the Seers are dangerous if they can affect the future. What if their intentions are not benevolent?"

"Then there's probably not much we can do to stop them."

"Maybe," I admitted reluctantly. "What did the seers want to see you for?"

Ben shrugged. "They gave me a quick lesson on looking into the time stream. They wanted to show me what would happen if you pursued having contact with your son at this time."

I chewed on my lower lip considering if I wanted to know. I wouldn't put it past them of altering a vision to suit their purposes. "What did you see?"

"It was fuzzy, but I saw someone other than Marcus on the throne and the world thrown into chaos. There would be war and hundreds of thousands of deaths and millions of refugees. I saw people so starved they looked like walking skeletons, their eyes shrunken in their sockets." Ben shuddered. "I don't know if what I saw was an accurate prediction or not, but they seemed to believe Marcus needed to be king to avoid the catastrophe."

I nodded silently. "Ema told me as much."

"What are you going to do?"

My head dropped heavily. "What the kriff can I do? If I care about my son I will stay away…at least until he turns twelve and becomes king. I was told it would be safer to contact him then."

"That's a long time."

"Yes." I closed my eyes in anguish. "A very long time."


	24. Chapter 24

**_Entry 100_ **

We returned to Coruscant and I tried to get on with my life. It is tough, especially when I have to face my parents. I hate having to keep the existence of my son from them. I think that is the worst part of this. If and when my parents find out about him, they will be so disappointed that they didn't have a chance to watch him grow up. I am in an impossible situation. If I tell anybody about him I could endanger his life and, according to the seers, I could possibly cause a cataclysm on the Crown Worlds if his true identity is revealed.

Ema told me she would send holos of Marcus as he grew up. The best I can do for my parents is to keep these holos in the hopes that one day if his paternity is revealed they could at least see images of my son growing up.

This is so kriffed up.

.

.

**_Entry 101_ **

I have volunteered for more missions. I thought keeping busy would keep my mind off Marcus.

I did some pilot practice missions using the StealthX fighters recently. A group of Jedi to include my father, my Master, Ben, Anakin, Jaina and also the Grand Master practiced starfighter squadron tactics using a method called a Force Meld.

A Force meld (also known as Jedi meld or Battle meld) is a technique where a number of Force users joined their minds together through the Force, so they can function almost as one person. The great thing about this skill is our minds can almost become one, and the drawback is our minds can almost become one. I really don't like other people's thoughts floating around my head. Usually there is no problem because we are concentrating at the task at hand, but if there is a lull in the battle stray thoughts can sometimes seep into the Meld.

For example, I sometimes can see Anakin's thoughts of his children flitter through my brain. Once I could see Jaina thinking about a certain pilot she had recently met (and who she obviously considered cute…unless she has an extraordinary appreciation of the man's backside for some other reason). My father, Ben and Uncle Luke are almost always thinking about food. My Master is frequently thinking that I need to work in the fight simulators more often.

I later realized I needed to keep tight control on my thoughts when on these missions. After our war games were finished, Ben came up to me and said he saw Marcus in my thoughts. Luckily he was the only person who probably made sense out of my stray mental images, although my father did give me a suspicious look after he exited his ship. Luckily he didn't question me about what was going through my head.

So much for keeping my mind off Marcus by immersing myself in training and missions.

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**_Entry 102_ **

Ema has kept her word and has sent holos of my son over the past few months. It is amazing seeing Marcus grow up. He looks so much like me when I was his age. She must take holos of every class and every event he goes to. She often sends me dozens of images and holofilms. She was also kind enough to send me old holos of Marcus' first steps and his first words (The word he would say most often sounded like 'Mema'. I assume it is a combination of Ema and Momma. Having identical twins raise you must be confusing).

I sometimes watch the holos over and over in my room. One day I was almost caught by my brother who walked into my bedchamber unannounced. I quickly turned off the holoprojector and put away the image cube. I must have been projecting panic and guilt through the Force because Jaden smirked and asked me, "What are you watching little brother?"

I knew what he thought I was looking at so I told him what he expected to hear. "Nothing…okay, I'm watching a skinholo."

He grinned as he walked over to the drawer that I tossed the image cube into. "Don't hold out. Aren't you going to share?"

I grabbed the cube containing the stored images and held it tightly in my hands. "No!"

His eyes narrowed. "Why not?"

I panicked and said the first thing that came to mind. "Because it's a homemade holo featuring me and…um…Nalli'ti."

Force! I hope Jaden doesn't mention that to anybody, especially not Nalli'ti. Not that she would be embarrassed, but she probably would think it was a great idea and the next thing I know she's hidden holocams in her dorm room.

Jaden's face scrunched up in disgust. "Gross! Thanks for the warning. I don't need to see that…unless you can totally edit yourself out and just leave your fine looking girlfriend." Jaden laughed. "Seriously, that's dangerous Talon. Holo's have a tendency to end up on the holonet. Keep that locked up. And for Sithsake don't let your Master or the Grand Master find out about that holo. I am fairly certain you are on some type of double secret probation with all the bad media you get." He grabbed a jacket I had borrowed from him off my dresser and held it up. "This is what I came in for." With that he walked out and didn't mention the holo again.

That was a close call. I don't know how I would explain why I was watching holos of a little boy…who coincidently looks exactly like I did at that age.

I have to be more careful.

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**_Entry 103_ **

~37 ABY~

Nalli'ti graduated from college this week. I know I said I didn't want a relationship, just friendly companionship, but I can't help but feel depressed. She has been a part of my life for years and I am going to miss her. She cried and kissed me and told me to look her up if I was ever on Zeltros. I pulled her into my arms and gave her an ardent kiss before I dropped my head to her shoulder and just held her close.

"Talon," she whispered to me. "You are the only man I've been with since we met."

I pulled back to look her in the eyes and smiled. "You're the only woman I dated since we met.

"I know. That's why I kept faithful despite our agreement of ' _no relationships and no attachments_ '."

"Yeah," I said slowly. "That was a stupid idea. I thought it would prevent heartache, but I was wrong. To be honest, I would love to have a real relationship with you."

She gave me a sad smile. "You know it wouldn't work. Monogamy is almost non-existent on my world. I don't think I could make a lifelong commitment and I know how much that means to humans. You deserve to be with someone that you can grow old with."

I heaved a sigh but gave her a nod of understanding. "I will miss you."

"I'll miss you also, Talon."

We kissed and then she got into a speeder with her parents and departed to the docking bay where a transport would take her away from me.

I wondered if I would ever find that special someone.

Ben's girlfriend Niki also graduated and went back to Ryloth, so Ben is also in poor spirits. Since they left, Ben and I have been hanging around my quarters playing holo-games on our off-hours. There is nothing more pathetic than two bachelors playing holo-games on the weekend.

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**_Entry 104_ **

I haven't posted anything in my journal for months. I miss my son and I miss Nalli'ti. I am so depressed. I try to keep busy, so I volunteer for every mission I can. I have even worked with Ben a few times on police investigations. Law Enforcement personnel love my post-cognitive abilities. The only bad thing is they don't tell me what to expect when they hand me evidence. They said they don't want to influence the results in any way. So they'll hand me a rock and then the next thing I know I am visualizing some woman getting bludgeoned to death with it. Simple murders are bad enough, but seeing something a sadistic torturer did to a victim over a period of days or weeks gives me nightmares. I remember one time I absolutely refused to handle an object. Force, it was a hideous torture device with spikes and razors. I looked at that monstrosity and said, "No frakkin way!"

I told the law enforcement officers to find me something else that the suspect might have handled—something innocuous, like a towel or soap. We were able to get the guy by me touching a hat the man had worn. I still got some bad vibes from that, but I bet it was nothing compared to what I would have saw touching that torture apparatus.

During the last few missions with Law Enforcement, I have learned to _never_ underestimate the depths of human (or alien) depravity.

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**_Entry 105_ **

~38 ABY~

I was finally knighted. I finished my trials and have been deemed worthy of Knighthood. I have to be honest it feels pretty good. My parent threw me a big party. There were family, friends, Jedi, soldiers and plenty of Jump Troopers in attendance. My elderly grandparents were also there. Grandma Starkos always embarrasses me by kissing my cheek and calling me her _baby's baby_. Mom is the youngest in her family and I am the youngest in mine. Grandpa Starkos slapped me on the back and told me how proud he was of his Jedi grandsons.

My dad introduced me to his friend Deke Tavik. Deke was his Jump Buddy when he attended Jump School decades ago. Deke's almost as tall and muscular as my father and there is an easy camaraderie between the two. He was wearing the uniform of a Hapan Officer, but my father later told me he wasn't Hapan, but from the planet Taris. He retired from the GA Jump Troopers and started working as a member of Tenel Ka's personal security team.

During the knighting ceremony I was given the emblem of a Jedi Guardian. My Master along with my mom pinned it on me. My mom didn't let my dad near me during the pinning part of the ceremony. I am pretty sure she didn't trust my father not to pound it into my chest like he did the Blood Wings.

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**_Entry 106_ **

Jacen finally returned to Coruscant. I tried to ask him about what he had learned in the past couple years, but he didn't really want to talk much. I think I know what's bothering him. A month after Jacen left on his Force-knowledge journey I was told Tenel Ka got pregnant. Nine months later she gave birth to a girl named Allana. She looks just like her mother with bright red hair and gray eyes. Tenel Ka wouldn't tell anybody who the father is, but she doesn't deny the rumors that the father is a Hapan Royal.

This has to be a crushing blow for Jacen. Everybody at the Jedi Temple knew he had feelings for the woman. I have no idea why they never got together. I think it has to do with the Hapan people's general dislike of Jedi. Also because Tenel Ka is the Queen of the Hapan Cluster she probably is expected to marry a royal. I suppose her marrying Jacen wouldn't be tolerated. Jacen is a commoner in their eyes, which I think it is a bunch of bantha crap. Jacen is the son of Princess Leia. So he should be considered a royal.

It is a cruel irony that Jacen _didn't_ father a royal daughter who he _can_ visit and I _have_ fathered a royal son who I _can't_ visit.

I don't know which is worse.

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**_Entry 107_ **

My parents have asked me (now that I am a Jedi Knight) if I will continue my studies by attending college. I told my father I would rather attend the GA School of Advanced Leadership and Tactics (GASALT). Like my father I prefer the military culture. I love the Jedi and I have no desire to leave, but I enjoy working with the GA military as a Jedi asset. My father has attended most of the military schools to include GASALT, the School of Advanced Military Studies, followed by the GA Warfare College. He said they were all great schools and upon completion a student will received a Masters of Military Arts and Science. That sounds good to me. There just aren't any majors in the civilian colleges that really attract me. Ben went to college to get a criminal justice degree to help him in his job as Jedi Sentinel. Jaden went to medical school. As a Jedi Guardian it makes sense to go to the military colleges where I would study leadership, combat strategy and how to work with various planetary defense forces.

I am on the list to go and knowing my father he will pull some strings to expedite my application. I swear he has contacts all over the place.

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**_Entry 108_ **

Jaden finished medical school and his internship. He is now _Doctor_ Jaden Tantiss: Jedi Healer extraordinaire (he hates it when I call him that). I think my mother is more proud about that Doctor designation than the one of Jedi Knight. When the family is out and about she always has to introduce her son as _Doctor_ Jaden Tantiss….not Jedi Healer Tantiss.

You would think Jaden would use his doctor title to get the girls, but he never does. He is focused on work all the time. My brother is boring.

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**_Entry 109_ **

My son turned five years old last week. I wish I could have been there with him. Ema sent me a holo of his birthday party. Stang! Royal kids get one huge party! He had a lot of guests at the celebration. Most of them were adults who I assume were members of the Indupar elite. There were a few children who Marcus played with enthusiastically. During the holo I spied some aliens in the background. They were humanoid in shape but had dark fur, rodent facial features and wore turbans. I realized these were members of the H'drachi Seers. I guess they were there to make sure all went according to their plan…whatever that is.

There was something else that stood out. Alongside Queen Kaie there was a man in uniform who stood very close to her and would occasionally place his hand around her waist. When the holo operator zoomed in I recognized him as Captain Dentii. I was wondering about the relationship between the two when the holo operator spoke. I realized then it was Ema taking the holos. "My sister has taken the Commander of her Guard, Captain Suojus Dentii, as her consort," Ema whispered into the holocamer microphone. "He's the man who brought you to see me years ago."

At that point I saw Captain Dentii pick up my son and put him on his shoulder. Marcus laughed in delight and I felt my heart clench. I was jealous and upset that some other man was raising my son. Ema must have known seeing this would upset me because she continued talking. "My sister thought having a male role model would be good for Marcus. I know you want to be that person. I'm sorry. If it makes you feel any better, which I doubt it will, Captain Dentii is probably the kindest man I have ever met…other than you." There was a long pause as she filmed the party. "I think you two would get along well. Kaie didn't wish to marry him without telling him the truth about Marcus. Suojus has been an advocate for you seeing your son. He grew up without a father and believes the Seers are wrong to keep you away. He believes Marcus will be angry at the deception when he comes of age." At that point the holo ended.

I was heartened by what she said and I started to like the man already. Maybe he can one day convince the Seers that I should see my son.

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**_Entry 110_ **

In the last year I have been on endless missions. I am mainly attached to the Jump Troopers or Intelligence. I prefer the Jump Troopers, but Intelligence has its benefits. Since I am officially single I have been dating a few of the young female officers. Since I am on deployment I don't have to worry about any long-term entanglements. That's fine with me. Women are heartbreakers. At least Nalli'ti told me up front that she didn't want a relationship. I now tell that to any woman I date. Unfortunately they never seem to believe me. Oh well.


	25. Chapter 25

**~39.9 ABY~**

**_Entry 111_ **

I was walking toward the Temple today when I was surprised to hear my name called. I turned and saw a _very_ sexy young lady walking up to me and smiling broadly. She was so beautiful I was momentarily stunned. When I realized who I was looking at I was absolutely shocked.

"Zylie?" I know the word came out sounding completely dumbfounded. It has been years since I've seen Talon Karrde's youngest daughter. I think the last time was when she was fifteen. Back then she was a skinny, pimple-faced, flat-chested twerp…but now…Stang! Four years have elapsed and Karrde's little girl was all grown up.

She had shoulder length silky brown hair that hung loose over her shoulders and framed a beautiful tanned face with perfectly sculpted cheekbones and full lips colored with a tantalizing red shade of lipstick. I know my jaw was hanging open as my gaze moved down her body to reveal ample breasts pressing against her tight tunic, a narrow waist, and graceful legs wrapped in tight leather pants.

I remember coughing as I tried to get the air back into my lungs. "Zylie, is that you?"

She gave me her trademark sarcastic smirk that let me know it actually was her. "Of course." She looked me up and down appraisingly. "I heard you are a full Knight now and a big war hero with a bunch of medals. I'm impressed. That last time I saw you, you were being an immature jerk to me."

I frowned. I can't remember exactly what I said to her the last time we were together, but I am sure I wasn't a jerk to her. "When was that?"

"It was during my father's birthday party. You said I was as mean-tempered as my vornskr."

I chuckled as I remembered that day. "I'm sorry Zylie. That was wrong of me. I meant to say your temper is worse than a vornskr. And you deserved it. If I remember correctly this was after you said, ' _Sic him Princess!'_ and the next thing I know I have an angry animal with rows of sharp teeth barreling down on me."

She laughed at me. "I stopped her before she bit off anything important."

"Yeah, thanks." I was already feeling annoyed. When it came to being around Zylie my Jedi calm went out the window. "Well, it's nice to see you. Don't be a stranger." I then started walking back to the Temple as I tried to put some distance between this young temptress and me.

Zylie ran after me and grabbed my arm. "Talon, I'm sorry. Listen, I just enrolled in the university and I need help navigating this city world. I'm already lost." She pulled out her datapad and punched at the touch screen. "I was supposed to go see your Uncle Luke when I arrived but I got all turned around and my global positioning program is all screwed up and sent me on a strange journey of the upper-levels. Can you show me to the temple?"

I let my gaze glide over her gorgeous body and I groaned inwardly. Zylie Karrde can only be trouble. She had grown into a woman who could temp a Bentu Monk out of his vow of chastity…and she is _so_ off limits to me. Her father would murder me if I laid a hand on her. Not that I would want to touch her…much.

"Yeah, follow me," I said as I led her to the Temple and the Grand Master's office.

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**_Entry 112_ **

After I dropped off Zylie I went to my room where I found my brother and Jysella going over what looked like her college homework. Jysella decided to train as a Jedi Healer and has repeatedly asked my brother to help her with her college classes. She must be having problems in school because she is always in our apartment getting tutored by Jaden.

"Guess who I saw?" I said.

"Who?" my brother replied without looking up from the book he was reading.

"Zylie Karrde. She's going to college here."

"Did she get her vornskr to attack you again?" Jaden snickered as Jysella laughed at his comment.

"No, but she is incredibly hot now! I mean she could be a model. And she isn't flat chested anymore she's got huge…"

"Talon," Jysella interrupted me. "Can you not objectify women while I'm around?"

"Sorry," I said embarrassed. I grew up with Jysella and often see her as another one of the guys. "She _is_ hot."

"Are you going to go for it?" My brother asked with a wry grin.

"Hell no," I said with a shake of my head. "If I touch Karrde's little girl he'll toss a ysalamiri into my room before he sends a whole pack of vorskrs to tear me apart. As far as I'm concerned Zylie Karrde is the most dangerous woman on the planet for me to be around."

My brother gave me a sly smirk. "That sounds like a challenge and I know how much you love overcoming challenges."

I shook my head. "Not this time."

And I _really_ meant it…but my mind kept floating back to Zylie in those tight, tight leather pants.

**_Force help me!_ **

**_._ **

**_._ **

**_Entry 113_ **

Over the next couple weeks Zylie kept stopping by to see me and my brother. She told me it was because she was overwhelmed by Coruscant. She was home-schooled (or I guess I should say, ship-schooled) aboard the _Wild Karrde_. She didn't have a lot of social experience and her father always had a watchful eye on her, so she never had a boyfriend…and now she is dropped off on the most populated planet in the galaxy and expected to assimilate.

Stang, when she was talking to me about the situation I could sense her confusion and nervousness. She really was overwhelmed. I hate to admit it, but I felt a little sorry for her. I know our past encounters were a bit antagonistic, but we were both young. I shouldn't hold that against her. So I decided to help her out by showing her around Coruscant…as a friend…a purely platonic relationship. That's all.

One night a group of us Jedi decided to go out to the nightclub the _Pandering Predator._ I thought I would be nice and call up Zylie to see if she wanted to tag along. She said yes, so I borrow my dad's cool red airspeeder (the one Mom calls the mid-life-crisis-mobile) and picked her up at her dorm.

I have to admit, she is gorgeous. She's a real head-turner at the club. She was wearing casual attire, but somehow she made simple off-the-rack tunic and pants look like designer clothing.

We met up with Valin, Jysella, Ben and Jaden at the club.

"I think everybody here knows Zylie Karrde," I said as Zylie and I took seats around the table with everybody else.

I noticed Valin's eyes lit up upon seeing Zylie. They know each other, but I don't think he has seen her since Anakin's wedding.

"It's nice seeing you again, Zylie," Valin said as his eyes raked down her body.

I didn't like the look in his eyes so I put an arm around Zylie's shoulder protectively. "Forget about it Valin, Zylie's my date tonight." It was a lie, I know. She was just there as a friend, but I didn't want him around Zylie. I felt I had an obligation as a family friend to defend her from the lecherous advances of Valin Horn. After all, Zylie is no Temple-yummy.

Zylie looked at my arm around her shoulder and then glanced over to me surprised. "I'm your date?" She stood and grabbed my hand. "Good, because I want to dance."

I groaned inwardly. "Sure." I asked Ben to order us some drinks as Zylie dragged me to the dance floor. It was a slow song so she put her arms up around my neck as I brought my arms loosely around her waist.

She gave me a knowing look. "Why are you suddenly so protective?"

I gave a slight roll of my eyes. "Valin's a womanizer."

She scoffed. "And you're not?"

"No, I'm not…well not really. I am a minor league player compared to Valin." I paused to collect my thoughts. "You are infinitely safer with me than him. He is a smooth operator."

"I think I can handle myself," she said sounding slighted.

"I'm sure you could," I said with a slight sarcastic tone. "That's why you keep calling me to help you adjust to this city-world."

"I'll stop calling you, if it's a bother."

"No," I said quickly. "I don't mind." I was shocked that I became distressed at the thought of her not calling.

_"What's wrong with me?"_

"Good," she said with a smile and she leaned into me while dancing. I would feel the swell of her breasts pressed against my tunic and the smell of her perfume as she laid her head on my shoulder. I realize I am way over my head with this situation. Just touching her makes my heart and stomach flutter. I am not sure why, but I suspect her being off limits makes her than much more tantalizing to me.

The music stopped and she looked up at me with those mesmerizing hazel eyes. "You're a good dancer."

I laughed. "You are the first woman to tell me so. Usually I'm breaking toes."

"I don't believe that," she said as she took my hand and we walked back to our seats.

Ben had gotten us a couple fruity drinks and handed one to Zylie as she sat down.

"So Zylie, how do you like college?" Ben asked.

"I'm liking it. I'm taking courses in information technology."

Ben smirked. "In other words you are gaining a sound foundation of computers and communications so you can become a slicer."

Zylie smirked back. "How'd you guess?"

Ben shrugged. "I just figured you might be going into the family business."

"And you would be right. The way I see it, a slicer on a smuggler/Trader ship has to be much more exciting than sitting in a cubicle doing remote tech support for someone who simply needs to do a hardboot on their computer."

"True," Ben said. He looked down at his drink and then back up to Zylie. "How's your sister Valla? I haven't seen her lately."

Zylie took a sip of her drink. "She finished college. She went to the University of Tyrena on Corellia and studied business management. She'll run Dad's business when he eventually retires…which I don't see happening anytime soon."

"Is she married or engaged?" Ben asked.

Zylie shook her head. "No, are you interested in applying for the position?"

I chuckled as Ben blushed. "No, I'm just catching up with old friends." He stood and held out his hand to Zylie. "May I have this dance?" He looked over to me. "That is if your _'date'_ doesn't mind."

"I'm sure he won't mind." Zylie took Ben's hand and followed him out to the dance floor. It was a fast dance but then the music faded into a slow romantic tune. I could see Zylie's arms around his neck as she leaned against Ben's shoulder…and it irritated me to no end. I have no idea why. We're just friends. Zylie and I aren't dating. I shouldn't care. I shouldn't, but I obviously do because I realized I was jealous.

My brother leaned across the table to whisper to me. "Wow, if looks could kill Ben would need a full bacta treatment right about now."

I turned and glared at my brother. "What are you saying?"

He smirked. "I'm saying no matter how much you say you don't want to date her…you do."

"That's not true."

His smile grew wider. "Then I guess you wouldn't mind if I danced with your date?"

Before I could answer I saw Jysella elbow my brother on the side. "You promised me the next dance."

He gave her a strange look that I couldn't quite identify. It was something between a smirk and a smile. "Of course." He stood and held out his hand to Jysella. "I was just giving Talon a hard time." They walked out to the dance floor where Jaden started showing off his impressive sensual slow dance moves that got Valin's teeth grating in irritation.

I smirked. "I think your sister has a thing for my brother."

Valin glared at my brother dancing with his sister for a moment before he gave a contemptuous shrug. "She's always had a thing for him. I told her it was pointless. Jaden is worse than Jacen when it comes to scoring with women." His eyes narrowed. "And he better stay that way because I will put the hurt on him if he touches my baby sister."

I really wanted to say, ' _You mean more than he is touching her now'_ , but I decided I didn't want my brother getting killed tonight. Instead I said, "She's not a baby. She's older than Zylie."

Valin smirked. "What exactly is going on between you two?"

"Nothing," I said. "We're just friends."

"So why didn't you want me around her?"

I glared at him. "Because she's a friend and I don't want to see her hurt."

Valin rolled his eyes. "You should talk."

"I'm not going to hurt her. We're just friends."

"So you wouldn't mind if Ben started dating her?" Valin asked with a snide look on his face.

I frowned. "Did Ben say he wanted to date her?"

"No, not outright at least. He just said she is beautiful…and she is."

I looked at Ben and Zylie out on the dance floor. I shouldn't have any problem with Ben dating Zylie. Ben's a great guy. He would never break her heart. That is a relationship I should encourage. She would be better off with him than me. I come with a whole lot of baggage, to include an awful reputation and an out-of-wedlock son I never see.

It was then that I realized I _was_ considering asking Zylie out on a date. I gave a mental shake of my head. I knew it wouldn't work out. I had a horrible track record when it came to women. Zylie deserves better. No, I couldn't ask her out. I can't even consider it.

It's not going to happen.

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**_Entry 114_ **

A few days later Zylie showed up at my apartment unexpectedly. I was a little surprised by her arrival, not only because she didn't say she was coming over, but also it was getting late.

She stood outside my door wearing a really cute little black dress that got my heartbeat thumping. It looked like she was coming from or going to a semi-formal dinner. "Hey Zylie. What's up?" I asked as I let her into my quarters.

"Nothing, I thought I would stop by to say _'hi'_ before I went back to my dorm." She walked into the living area and waved at my brother who was watching the HoloNet. He smiled and gave her quick wave back before he turned his attention back to his show.

"Where'd you just come from?" I asked. "You look…that dress looks great on you."

She looked down at her wardrobe and smiled at my compliment. "You like it? Nothing beats a little black dress when you are not sure what to wear." She pirouetted allowing me to see how the outfit hugged her gorgeous figure. It was a long strapless dress that made me wonder how the hell did it stay up on her body and how did she keep certain parts in her anatomy from falling out of the dress?

I swallowed hard and hoped my voice didn't crack like a fourteen-year-old boy when I spoke. "Yes, it's…." I took a deep breath. "It's very nice."

"Thanks. Ben said the same thing."

I know my jaw tightened slightly. "Ben? You were out with Ben?" My stomach clenched when I realized Ben obviously had no reservations about dating Zylie. I gave a soft sigh and then smiled. "Did you two have fun?"

She smiled as she walked over to my brother to see what he was watching. "I had dinner with his family. I had a good time. Ben seemed flustered and flushed all night. I think he is coming down with something."

I contained an amused snort. I bet I know what got Ben flustered. Ha!

"The Grand Master said he will give me a ride back to the University, but I told him I wanted to stop by and see you two first. I don't want to bother him. I'm going to take the public transit back. I've been practicing getting around Coruscant using the hovertrain and I think I have it down now."

I looked her up and down and realized there was no way in the Nine Corellian Hells I was going to let her take the hovertrain home dressed like that, especially after dark. "Let me get my cloak and I'll escort you back to your dorm," I said as I grabbed my belt off the side table and put on my lightsaber.

"You don't need to do that," she protested weakly, but I could tell she was happy to have the company. I pulled on my cloak and opened the door for her.

"So are you and Ben dating?" I asked as we walked out of the temple and toward the hover train station. I have no idea why this question was running through my brain frantically.

She gave a soft laugh. "No, not that I'm not attracted to him. He has beautiful blue eyes" (I'm thinking, ' _like mine'_ ). "He looks like he spends a lot of time in the gym. He is very muscular" (' _not as muscular as I am'_ , I thought). "And he is so shy and sweet" ( _okay, he may have me in that department_ ). "But, I have a friend who is very interested in him and I don't want to do anything to jeopardize our friendship…so he is off limits to me."

When I felt my body relax, I once again admonished myself for even considering a relationship with this beautiful woman. I'm bad news when it comes to females.

"Ben has a secret admirer?"

She gave me a coy look. "Yes."

"Who is it?"

She shook her head. "Now, it wouldn't be a secret if I told you."

We arrived to the transport platform and swiped our ride-cards to board the train. We sat down in the cushioned seats as we looked out the transparasteel windows and watched the city zip by us. "How's school?"

She gave a delicate shrug. "It's fine, but I discovered that information technology is a male dominated field. I guess I shouldn't complain, but I'm getting tired of socially inept men making awkward attempts at flirtation." She laughed softly. "It's almost painful. I had one guy ask me if I would accompany him to some geeky science fiction HoloCon convention." She smirked. "He said he dresses as a Hapan pirate like in the Holo _Pirates of the Mists_."

I smiled. I am secretly a fan of _Pirates of the Mists_ , but my nerdish pursuits are restricted to the Holos and novels. I don't costume play, collect toys or do rollplaying games. "Don't be too hard on the man. It is a great Holo."

She turned and looked at me with a smirk. "You're a fanboy? Aren't you?"

I blushed. "Slightly."

She laughed and touched my arm as she leaned her head against my shoulder. "The man who has more adventures than probably any real Hapan pirate is a _Mists_ Fanboy. That's cute."

There was that classic Zylie sarcasm I've known all my life, but for some reason it didn't irritated me as much now as when we were younger.

"Here's my stop." She gave me a bright smile. "Did you want to see my dorm room? That last time you came to pick me up we met in the lobby."

Oh boy, that probably is a very, very bad idea. My brain said _'no'_ , but for some reason my mouth said _'yes'_. She grinned happily as she wrapped her arm around mine and we walked onto the university grounds.

"Do you have a roommate?" I asked and I really hoped she did because I needed a chaperone to keep me in check. Damn that dress she was wearing was killing me. I am surprised she hadn't slapped me because my eyes were continuously drifting down to her cleavage. I couldn't help it. How does that dress stay up? She's not flat chested. There must be repulsor-lifts somewhere sewn into the fabric.

We walked into the large lobby and she stuttered stepped when she saw a group of men standing and talking across the way. I looked down at her. "What is it?"

She sighed. "Two of the five men there have been persistently hinting in class that they are interested in me. I don't want to be harsh with them because they are so nice, but they know I'm not dating anyone and…" she stopped and looked up at me and I could see a mischievous glint in her eyes. "If I can convince them I'm dating somebody, maybe they will leave me alone." She leaned in and whispered to me. "Can you please pretend you are my boyfriend for a few minutes?"

"I don't know about that," I was able to say before she hugged me tightly.

As she pulled away she gave me a very sensual smile. "Thank you for a wonderful date," she said a little louder than normal. "Come on up to my room and we can have a drink."

Before I could say anything she grabbed my hand and pulled me over to the turbolifts. On the way there we passed the group of men whose eyes were transfixed on her dress…or at least parts of her body under that dress. "Hi Steben, Jalloj," she waved at two of the men. She then turned to me. "This is my boyfriend Talon. He's a Jedi Knight and a Jump Trooper."

When I just stood there speechless she elbowed me in the side. "These are a couple students from my computer classes."

I regained my composure and offered them my hand in greeting. Both men looked up at me slack jawed. They weren't short by normal standards but I was at least a quarter of a meter taller than them and my large muscular frame probably outweighed them by thirty kilograms. One man was brave enough to shake my hand and I saw him stare nervously as his much smaller hand disappeared into my grip. It's a good thing I'm not as big as my father, because I would have probably given him a heart attack. "It's nice to meet you. Zylie told me so much about the men she's attending class with."

The man whose hand I was shaking blanched and I could feel his palm become sweaty. "I…ah…I didn't know Zylie was dating anybody," he finally said almost apologetically. He must be wondering what Zylie said to me.

I gave him a wide smile. "Zylie and I have been friends since we were children, but we didn't start dating until she started school here." I was really surprised how that lie came out of my mouth so easily.

Zylie pulled on my arm as the lift doors opened. "Come on Talon. Time to go." She looked to the two men. "See you guys in class." They both gave her a wave and I could see the disappointment in their eyes. I guess I dashed their hopes of getting a date with Zylie.

We got into the lift and when the doors closed she laughed. "Talon, when you shook Steben's hand I thought he was going to wet himself."

I frowned. Jedi are not supposed to be intimidating people. "Is he the pirate boy?" I asked.

She laughed again. "No that is Jalloj. Steben likes to dress up like an ancient Sith Lord like in the holo _Rise of the Sith_." She laughed some more as she leaned against me for support. "I guess seeing a real Jedi scared the poodoo out of him."

"Zylie, I shouldn't be used to scare people like that."

She gave me a confused look. "Why not?"

I shrugged. "I just don't like to use the robes and saber to intimidate people."

She scoffed. "I really don't think the robes and the lightsaber are what intimidated them. You could have been naked and unarmed and they would have been frightened."

I had to laugh at that visualization. "I wouldn't blame them. I would think a naked two meter tall, muscle bound man would be even more frightening to run into."

She looked me up and down and for a moment I got the impression she was visualizing me nude. "Well, maybe to men. I am sure the ladies would have a different reaction."

I didn't say anything to that comment. The doors opened and we exited to her floor. "Come on."

She brought me to her dorm room door. "Daddy paid for me to have a private room." She punched in her keycode and the door slide open. She walked in and then turned to me questioningly when I didn't enter. "Come on in."

I took a deep breath. "Zylie, I don't think that's a good idea."

Her brow furrowed. "Why not?"

My eyes slowly raked down her body. That dressed looked great on her. I really needed to leave, because at that moment the only thing I thought would look better on her than that dress… would be me. I started to sweat and I tried to think about shockball in an effort to get my mind off this seductress. "Zylie, I have training early tomorrow morning. I have to go."

"Oh, okay," she said sounding disappointed. "Will I see you…or your brother later?"

"Yeah…I'll give you a call tomorrow." I started my retreat to the lifts. "Bye," I said before I quickly removed myself from temptation.

_I think I am fighting a losing battle._


	26. Chapter 26

**_Entry 115_ **

I promised to call Zylie the next day, so I felt obligated to do so. I didn't want her to think I was rude after all. We talked on the comlink daily after that. I was still determined to keep things platonic and so far so good, but after a few weeks a strange thing happened. I didn't think it conceivable, but Zylie's snarky attitude grew on me. We weren't dating…at least not technically, but we are going out all the time as friends.

Friends is okay with me since I am not in the market for a relationship. After Nalli'ti graduated and left Coruscant I had been satisfied with occasionally dating different ladies. I would go out with a woman for a few weeks…right up to that point when she began hinting about a committed relationship. When I reminded her that I was upfront about not wanting anything long-term she would often leave me in a huff. I guess women expect me to change my mind. I just don't want to have my heart broken again by getting too emotionally involved.

Now after weeks of hanging around Zylie, I find myself in a predicament. Zylie is just a friend and I am determined to keep her that way, but I think she starting to see me as a potential boyfriend…meaning if I date other women that would probably hurt her…even though Zylie and I not officially dating…we haven't even kissed.

But, if I don't want to possibly hurt her, my only other option is to become a sexless monk while she is attending school and hanging out with me.

When I brought to my concerns to my brother he wasn't any help.

"You can start a relationship with Zylie," he said while we were sitting in our apartment living room. "You two get along well enough…and she is absolutely gorgeous. You're never going to do better."

"It's not a good idea," I said.

My brother looked over from the HoloNet show he was watching. "Are you saying you are not attracted to her? That you wouldn't want to get romantic with her? If so you're an idiot."

"I didn't say that," I replied a bit annoyed. "She is beautiful and we have a wonderful time together, it's just…I don't know." I closed my eyes and sighed deeply. "I would love to date her, but I know I'll screw it up. I am not going to hurt Zylie and get her family and our family furious with me."

My brother shrugged. "Then stop hanging around her all the time…even if it is just as friends…because I can tell she wants more. Stop leading her on before she gets hurt."

I nodded. "I should…I will. I'll explain the problem to her."

My brother looked up from his holonet show and smiled. "Good luck with that. Zylie is one stubborn woman."

Damn! He's right, but what has to be done has to be done.

.

.

**_Entry 116_ **

It took me a few days, but I finally worked up the courage to tell Zylie my concerns about our growing friendship. I know I should have invited her over to my apartment to talk, but I was a little nervous about how she would react to my withdrawal from our friendship. _Withdrawal_ really isn't the right word, because I wasn't exactly withdrawing. I still wanted to remain friends. I was just trying to cool down what seemed to be a friendship on the road to romance.

Of course, withdrawing, cooling down…it's all semantics. The bottom line is I was going to tell her something she might not like, so I decided to invite her out to dinner at a nice restaurant and then discuss this with her. I figured in a public place she wouldn't make a scene if she didn't take the news well (looking back I realize that could have really blown up in my face if she did make a big scene. I probably would have ended up as the lead story in some sleemo tabloid. Sometimes I'm an idiot.).

Getting back to my story… we were at the restaurant and had finished our meal of bantha steaks. Zylie was aimlessly chitchatting about her classes when I finally blurted out what I had in mind. "Zylie, we have to talk."

She stopped and looked at me nervously. "About what?"

I took a deep breath and let it out. "Zylie, I think we should ease up on seeing each other so much."

Her brow rose and her eyes took on a hurt look. "And why is that?"

"Zylie, I think I may have been giving you the wrong impression about…us," I said as I shifted in my seat uneasily. "Now, don't take this the wrong way; you are a beautiful woman, I genuinely enjoy your company and I really, really like you, but we both know we're never going to be more than just friends."

Her eyes narrowed. "Not that I asked to be more than friends," she said in a frosty tone. "But out of sheer curiosity…why couldn't we become more than friends?"

I raised an eyebrow in disbelief. "Why? Because your dad would skin me alive if he knew we were hanging out together."

She gave me her distinctive ' _Zylie Karrde'_ stubborn look that I am oh-so-familiar with. "I didn't realize the mighty Jedi is scared of my father."

Despite the scorn in her voice I had to laugh. "Well, I am. Him and his pack of Jedi-eating vornskrs."

"This is ridiculous," she said frustrated. "My dad likes you."

"As a friend of the family," I pointed out. "He would definitely not be happy if he found out we been going out together. You should be dating guys that you could have a future with…like Steben; he's a nice and shy computer student that I'm sure your father would approve of."

Zylie made a face and a sound of disgust.

I blew out a frustrated breath. "Zylie, you know we can't be a couple. I think we really should limit the time we hang out together. I don't want either of us to get hurt emotionally."

She gave me a dramatic roll of her eyes. "We're not having sex. I don't know why you are making a big deal about this. We're just friends."

I nodded. "True, but Zylie, we've been getting close, really close and… and I suspect you want more."

She averted her eyes. "I wouldn't mind if it turned out to be more, but I'd be satisfied if we just remained friends."

"Really," I asked incredulously. "Tell me…would you be upset if I started dating another woman and became intimate with her? Would you be able to see me just as a friend and give me well wishes about my new relationship?"

Her face fell. "Is that what this is about? Having sex? I'm not putting out and you want to go find somebody who does?"

I was taken aback at her words and the utter sadness behind them. "No…I didn't mean that. Why would you think that? I haven't even hinted about sex. I am not expecting that from you." My voice rose slightly in frustration and I noticed some restaurant patrons turned their heads our way. I now really wished we discussed this in a private setting. I lowered my voice and continued. "All I am saying is we can't be a couple, I don't want to lead you on and give you the impression that there's a possibility that we can be more than friends. And if I do find somebody I want to be romantic with, I don't want it to hurt you."

She folded her arms across her chest and glared at me. "You already hurt me, Talon. You are throwing away our friendship because you're afraid. I don't think you are afraid of hurting me as much as you are afraid you might actually fall for me and then you'll have to follow a straight and narrow path. If you have a relationship with me there would be consequences if you used me up and threw me aside like I heard you have done with other women."

"What? I don't use up and discard women," I said flustered. "Where do you hear these rumors?" I stopped and sighed heavily while lowering my head. "You're right. If I date you I would have to be on my best behavior and make sure I don't screw up. That's a lot of pressure—because I _always_ screw up." I gazed into her eyes. "Zylie, I wouldn't be saying this if I didn't care for you deeply."

Her features softened as she reached across the table and grasped my hand in hers. "Talon, if you want to date somebody else, that's fine, but don't just dump me out of your life. I really like hanging out with you and your friends." She gazed at me with those beautiful deep dark eyes. "Why are you bringing this up now? Is there somebody you want to date?"

I looked away and felt my gut churning nervously. I shouldn't have eaten a big meal before discussing such an impassioned topic. I closed my eyes and took a few deep, calming breaths as I tried to call on the Force for guidance. It was then that I felt a strange stirring in the Force that I have never felt before.

I had discussed the possibility of shatterpoints with Ben once before and for some reason I got the distinct impression that I was sitting on the mother-of-all shatterpoints—right here and now. Whatever I said or did in the next few minutes could change my life forever. Unfortunately, I had no idea what I should do. My brain told me to continue with my plan, but my heart fought against it.

I looked up to Zylie and knew I had to tell her the truth, no matter what the consequences. "To be honest," I stammered. "There is someone I want to date."

She released my hand and sat back. "Oh, I didn't know. I shouldn't have been occupying all your time." She took a shuttering breath. "Is it somebody I know?"

I gazed deep into her eyes and confessed. "Yes…it's you."

Kriff…I knew I couldn't break it off. I really hoped I was doing the right thing. Somehow I think I did, because as soon as I said the words it felt like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders and my sense of unease vanished.

I saw Zylie's eyes light up and a wide smile blossom across her face. "I would like to date you also."

I grinned broadly but then held up my hand in a stopping motion. "Okay, if we're going to do this, we'll need some ground rules."

She raised an eyebrow but nodded for me to continue. "I want to go slow with this courtship. And I mean real slow… so no sex for at least six months. If this doesn't work out I want to be able to tell your father I never laid a hand on you. I think within six months we will be able to tell if this is going to work out or not."

She gave a soft snort. "I don't know."

"What?"

She threw her hands up in gesture of disbelief. "Look at you Talon." She pointed to me. "You are two meters of rock hard muscle with a sexy face and who, according to the HoloNet tabloids, is a demi-god in bed." She grinned. "I, on the other hand, am a nineteen-year-old virgin. How can I possibly resist you for six months?"

I guffawed. "You are just going to have to dig deep and find some willpower little girl."

She threw her napkin at me and snickered. "I'll try, Jedi Tantiss, I'll try. And if you say, _'Do or do not, there is no try'_ , I will stick Princess on you."

"I don't want that. That animal has a fascination with my crotch."

Zylie raised an amused eyebrow. "She's not the only one I am told."

I tossed her napkin back at her. "Knock it off and let's plan our first official date."

She smiled. "I thought you would never ask."

.

.

**_Entry 117_ **

I returned to my apartment after dropping Zylie off at her dorm. My brother was sitting in the living area doing some sort of data work; he was probably researching medical stuff again. He looked up from his datapad and smirked at me. "You're back and in one piece. How did your talk with Zylie go?"

I gave him my best disinterested shrug. "Fine." I hoped he would drop the subject, but my brother has inherited my mother's knack of knowing when I am lying. He sat back on the couch and gave me a disbelieving snort. "So you told her you want to stop seeing her so often and she said she was fine with that?"

"Sort of," I said elusively as I went to the cooling unit to grab some flavored bottled water.

"So, Zylie, the most stubborn person I have ever met simply rolled over and went along with your plan to not see each other as much?"

"Basically."

My brother chuckled and shook his head. "You couldn't do it, could you?"

My head dropped in embarrassment. "No."

He stood and walked over to the kitchen to get his own drink. "Please tell me you're not married…because knowing Zylie she probably could have convinced you to elope with her tonight if she wanted to."

I dropped down in my reclining chair. "I'm not like dad. I'm not going to let a woman get me whipped," I said defensively.

My brother laughed. "You may not be whipped yet, give it time."

I took a swig of my drink and glared at my brother. "Why do you say that?"

"Because she is probably the most beautiful woman I've seen you hang around with. Beautiful women have a way of taming males."

"She's not going to tame me," I assured my brother.

My brother snorted a laugh. "Oh please! Zylie's _always_ been able to put you in your place. And, she has _always_ found a way to get what she wants, and I am fairly sure she's wanted you for some time."

"What? That's preposterous. Have you seen us together when we were younger? We fight and then she gets a large animal to attack me. We don't exactly have a great history together."

"Don't you get it?" My brother said as he sat back down. "Children show their interest in the opposite sex by teasing and irritating the object of their affection. The way I see it, her harassing and antagonizing you for the last decade indicates she had a crush on you."

I shook my head in disbelief. "I'm six years older than her. She wouldn't have a crush on me." I hesitated when I realized Ema was six years older than me and I had much more than a crush on her. Maybe Jaden's theory wasn't too farfetched.

My brother shrugged. "It is common for young girls to be attracted to older boys…especially the bad boy…you know, the one that would really drive her parents crazy if she dated him." He gave me a mischievous smirk.

My brow furrowed with doubt. "You really think she's had a crush on me this whole time?"

"Sure. She's never harassed me, Ben, the twins, Jacen, Anakin or Valin for that matter…only you."

I took a sip of my drink and thought about it. Could it be possible? Zylie always did go out of her way to bug me, and that would explain why she has been very flirtatious with me since her arrival on Coruscant.

I looked over to my brother. "We decided to start dating. Do you think I'm doing the right thing? I don't want to break her heart."

Jaden set his drink down on the caf table in front of him and looked at me intently. "Talon, although it kills me to say this…you are not a bad guy." He took a deep breath let it out. "I know you have a terrible reputation as a womanizer, but we both know you don't take advantage of women. I've never heard you tell a girl what she wanted to hear just to get her in bed. I've never known you to date more than one woman at a time. You've never cheated on a girlfriend. If you were the womanizing monster that the tabloids portray you as, you wouldn't be fretting about dating Zylie. You'd simply date her and not given a flying-frack whether she got hurt or not."

I was taken aback by my brother's kind words. Usually he was telling me I was an idiot in his not-so-loving brotherly way. "Thanks Jaden."

He sighed. "Listen Talon, you got your heart broken and now you think you can't handle relationships, but it's not true. You spent years dating Nalli'ti."

I was about to say something but he put up a hand stopping me. "Yeah, I know you two had a friends-with-benefits arrangement…but I never saw you or her ever date anybody else once you two hooked up. You and Nalli'ti had a very real and monogamous relationship…for years! This proves you can handle relationships. Just be honest and faithful to Zylie and it'll work out."

"You think so?"

"Sure. You and Zylie will be fine. Unless I decide to steal her away from you, and then you're screwed."

I scoffed. "Yeah, like that's going to happen."

My brother laughed. "You're right. I couldn't handle Zylie. You are a braver man than I." He held up his drink and gave me a salute. "To Zylie and Talon."

I raised my bottled water. "I'll drink to that."


	27. Chapter 27

**_Entry 118_ **

Our first real date was fun. I brought Zylie to the Coruscanti Adventure Aquarium. It was interesting seeing aquatic creatures from across the galaxy. There was everything from Grimwaldi Sponges to Dozoisian sharks to Opee Sea Killers from Naboo. We then went and had some spicy Gargon gumbo that we found at a nice diner a few blocks from the aquarium.

Afterwards we went back to my apartment at the Temple to watch a holofilm. It was an action adventure with lots of explosions and blasterfire, which was a relief. I really don't like watching girlie-holoflicks. Oh, in the past I'd watch them with a girlfriend…usually for the sole purpose of making out afterwards…but since that was not on the agenda with Zylie and me…then I'd rather not have to endure watching a love story.

After the holo ended Zylie looked over to me and said. "I have a question about this no-sex-for-six-months pledge."

"And that is?" I asked curiously.

"What is your definition of sex?"

I chuckled. "My definition of sex is whatever your father would deem as me having sex with his daughter. The entire objective is for me not to be killed by your dad."

"I know, but what do you think he would object to?"

I groaned in frustration. "I would think he would be upset if this part of my body," I motioned to my groin area. "Touched any part of your body from here to here." I motioned from the top of her head down to her toes. It looked like she was going to object so I quickly continued. "In addition, I think if this part of my body," I motioned my hands around my head and face. "Comes into contact with any part of your body from between here." I pointed to her neck. "To here." I pointed to her knees. "Your father would have my offending head removed forcibly and probably in the most painful manner imaginable."

She smirked at me. "Then that means this part of your body." She reached up and put a delicate finger on my lips. "Would be okay to touch this part of my body." She brought her finger back to touch her lips. She then leaned in and kissed me.

Force! What a sweet kiss. My arms moved by their own volition and wrapped around her waist to pull her closer until she was almost on my lap. After a moment we pulled apart and she gave me a shy look. "How was that?"

"Wonderful," I said.

"I only kissed a couple guys before when I was younger. I don't think they knew what they were doing and neither did I. That's definitely the best kiss I've ever had."

I grinned. "Thank you."

"Can you teach me how to do a _'Corellian soul kiss'_?"

I cleared my throat nervously. "You mean a deep, open mouth kiss?"

She smiled broadly. "Yes, I want to make sure I'm doing it right."

I was beginning to get very uncomfortable with the direction this night was heading. How in the galaxy would I make it through six months of chastity with this nineteen-year-old exquisite woman enticing me? "Zylie, this is just our first official date. I don't want to die from sexual frustration so early in our courtship."

She found that extremely funny. "Fine…maybe I'll get farther along with you on our second date." She raised a questioning eyebrow. "Which is…when?"

I shrugged. "I have training classes this week during the day, but I am free in the evenings."

"Tomorrow night?"

"Sure," I said. "That would be perfect."

I then escorted Zylie back to her dorm room…and I did give her a quick lesson in _'Corellian soul kissing'_ before I left her room. She's a quick learner.

.

.

**_Entry 119_ **

I shouldn't have made the _no sex_ for six months rule because I think Zylie is having fun tempting me. Either that or she usually dresses in outfits that a Zeltron would deem immodest. I swear if her father ever saw her clothing he would have a conniption.

The upside is I am perceived as the luckiest kriff in the universe.

.

.

**_Entry 120_ **

Zylie had some time off during the weekend so she asked if she could watch me spar. I told her no problem. So, I arrange for Ben and me to spar in the gym. I escort Zylie to the observation booth before going down to the sparring arena where Ben and I prepared to fight.

"Do you want to use practice sabers or real ones?" Ben asked.

I smirked. "Real ones that will really impress Zylie." I looked up to her and waved.

Ben chuckled. "I'll give her something to be impressed with. He then took off his tunic exposing his bare chest. He flexed his muscles a few times and gave me a smug look. "Is she looking at me?"

I looked up at Zylie. "She's laughing so she must be looking." I snickered. "You have freckles on your shoulders also?"

Ben grinned. "When I win, maybe I'll let Zylie connect the dots."

I punched Ben on the shoulder. "Don't even think about it."

I know Ben is just joking, but not to be outdone I took my tunic off also.

Ben gave me a mischievous look. "I heard your dad is banned from sparring shirtless."

I shrugged. "He can't help it if women find Tantiss men so attractive."

"Let's see how attractive you look after I trounce you in front of your girlfriend."

"Ha!" I said…and it would actually be funny if I didn't know that Ben was much better than me with the lightsaber. Like my father, I would rather take on the enemy with a blaster.

My Uncle Luke once told me the lightsaber is an elegant weapon from a more civilized age. Really? Decapitating people with a lightsaber is much more civilized than putting a blaster bolt into the enemy? That never made any sense to me.

We ignited our lightsabers and circled around each other looking for an opening for the first strike. Ben made the first move. He swung his blade toward my head. I brought up my saber and blocked… and I was positive that I heard Zylie gasp in terror. Occasionally I had a chance to look over to her. She had her eyes partially covered with her hands and was peeking out between her fingers.

Ben and I put on an impressive show with lots of flips, Force shoves, strikes and parries until we were covered with sweat. I looked up to the viewing stand and noticed that almost a dozen young female apprentices were watching our performance. I signaled to Ben to end the session. We both deactivated our sabers and shook hands. "Ben, I think your fan club is here."

Ben looked up to the young women and gave them a wave. I swear I saw one swoon. I thought that only happened in holofilms. At that moment a scary thought popped into my head. I hope those young women weren't saying anything about me because I am not sure what Zylie would do or say in response. "Thanks Ben," I said as I pulled on my tunic and quickly moved toward the viewing area. "I better get up there before tongues start wagging."

When I got to the observation booth a number of the female apprentices turned my way and smirked. I quickly grabbed Zylie around the waist and gave her a deep, intimate kiss. When we broke apart I noticed a couple of the women were blushing. I suspect they might have made some comments about me in front of Zylie. I gave her a sensual smile. "Let's go to my quarters. I need to shower and dress and then we can go do something."

Zylie smiled smugly. "Yes, let's get you into a shower." She then slapped my bottom. Okay, she's marking her territory and letting the other ladies know I'm off limits.

As we walked toward my apartment she was giggling under her breath. "Okay," I said. "What did those women say that is so amusing?"

She lifted a hand up to stifle her laughter. "Stang Talon, you have one outlandish reputation."

I groaned. "What was it now? Was it about me sleeping through various sororities while dressed up as a bounty hunter?"

She laughed but then gave me a serious look. "Did you do that?"

I shook my head. "No. And I didn't father Lorria Bentess' child."

"The holo actress? I didn't know you knew her."

"I never met her. The tabloid writers must think I can impregnate women by looking at them funny."

"And what look would that be?"

I shrugged. "I don't know, how about this." I then puckered my lips and closed my eyes in an over exaggerated display of emotion.

She smacked my shoulder. "I better not be pregnant now or you will have to face Daddy."

"I don't want that." I gazed down at her and smiled. "Did they say anything bad about me?"

She gave a disbelieving shake of the head. "The women were talking about your reputation as a ladies' man. They said it is rumored that you had slept with dozens of women over the years."

"That's not true."

Zylie laughed. "That's what one of the women said. Her theory is this womanizing reputation was invented by you to disguise the fact that you prefer the company of men."

I stopped in my tracks. "What?"

"You heard me. And honestly, it would make a great cover story."

"That is absolutely untrue." I shook my head. "Who did they think I was dating?"

"Who's Raynar?"

I gagged. "Zylie, if I ever decided to swing that way it would be with somebody with a personality and much better looking." I gave her an evil grin. "I would clone myself to date."

"You're bad."

"How could I not go that route?" I joked. "I am the epitome of male perfection and drop dead gorgeous."

She shook her head. "It wouldn't work. You'd eventually think you're too good for your clone and dump him."

I nodded. "That's probably true. I bet my clone would be a conceited narcissist who thought he was the Force's gift to both man and womankind."

She gave a soft snort. "You are unbelievable."

"That's what I'm told," I kidded.

We got to my quarters and inside was my brother playing a hologame with Jysella. I have no idea why my brother keeps inviting her over. I can't believe he was lecturing me about not leading Zylie on, but here he is totally oblivious to the fact that Jysella obviously has a crush on him. Oh well, Valin warned his sister that my brother is as clueless as Jacen when it came to women.

Jysella waved at me and smiled wildly when we entered. "I got a new Hologame. It's called _Jedi Vs. Sith Unbound_. You want to join us."

I shook my head. "No, I need to shower. Maybe Zylie will play."

"Maybe later, I need to catch up with some messages sent to me." She pulled out her datapad and sat down at our small kitchen table.

I took a shower and dressed. When I came out Zylie was playing the hologame and totally trouncing my brother and Jysella. Ha! She ended up decapitating their holo characters with her glowing red lightsaber. She then got up off the couch and did the _'I won!'_ dance. My brother looked a little putout that a non-force user beat him in a Jedi/Sith hologame.

Zylie smiled at my brother. "Don't feel bad. I am a level twelve Sith Lord in this game. They play it in my dorms…all the time. The place is full of Information Technology geeks after all." She walked over to me and gave me an apologetic smile. "Talon, I need to go to the university to attend a last-minute study group."

"Okay, I'll escort you back."

"No need. I have the mass transit schedule and routes memorized now. I can get to the university with no problems." She wrapped her arms around my neck and then stood on her toes to me a brief kiss on the lips. She stepped away and turned to Jaden and Jysella. "I'll see you later." With that said she walked out of our apartment.

Jysella and Jaden began another game and started to drive me crazy. They would yell at the hologame every time their character did something extremely well or horrifically bad. I went back to my room to avoid all the noise. After about a half hour my datapad light flickered indicating I had a text message. I picked it up and saw it was from Zylie. It said:

_'I had fun today stud'._

I smiled. ' _So did I',_ I wrote back.

I was a little shocked by her response. ' _Next time maybe we can shower together.'_

Whoa…that is going a little fast. ' _I don't think that would be a good idea.'_

_'I can't help it. I want to make love to you again and feel your hands all over my body.'_

I was a bit confused? Again? We've haven't had sex yet. What was she talking about? Suddenly, a disturbing thought came to mind—was she dating another man and was now texting the wrong person?

_'Zylie, you do know you are texting Talon, right?'_

Her response was equally confusing.

_'Of course, you are the man of my dreams. You are so sexy in bed.'_

"What the kriff!" I said out loud. Then I thought I heard something that sounded like laughter in the distance. I reached out with the Force and I could feel amusement coming from my brother's room. "Damn it."

I was pretty sure Zylie forgot her datapad in the apartment and now my brother was having a little fun. I went over to his room and barged in. There I found Jysella and my brother sitting on his bed. I noticed Jysella had one hand behind her back like she was hiding something. "What are you two doing?" I said accusingly.

My brother was trying to keep a straight face. "Nothing."

"Then why are you two hiding in this room?"

Jysella looked at my brother questioningly before she turned to me and smiled. "We were about to have sex."

"Yep," my brother agreed. "We came into this room to have hot passionate sex."

"Yes," Jysella continued. "We have sex all the time." She reached over and put a hand on my brother's knee. I noticed my brother jumped a bit. "Your bother is such a stud, I can't control myself. I dragged him into the bedroom to play ' _doctor and the naughty Med-student_ '." She moved her hand upward from his knee. "I need some hard tutoring doctor."

At this point my brother was biting his bottom lip to keep himself from laughing.

I walked up to Jysella. "What do you have behind your back? Do you have Zylie's datapad?"

"No!" they both said with a laugh.

"It's just…ummm… marital bedroom toys." At that comment they both burst out with more laughter. My brother fell back in bed and grabbed his ribs that must have hurt from laughing so hard.

"That's bantha crap!" I walked up to Jysella and reached around her back and grabbed Zylie's datapad. I gave Jysella a stern look. "That. Wasn't. Funny!" I emphasized each word.

Jysella and Jaden were now in near hysterics. "I disagree," my brother said. "I think it was hilarious."

Jysella was now laughing so hard her face was turning red. She fell back in bed and covered her mouth with her hands in an effort to curtail her laughter.

"How did you figure it out it wasn't Zylie so soon?" my brother asked once he caught his breath.

"Because Zylie and I haven't had sex yet."

My brother's eyes went wide. "You're kidding me?"

I shook my head. "No kidding. We made a pact that we would wait six months before we had sex. I want to make sure this relationship can survive before we get hot and heavy."

Jaden started laughing again. "Six months! The last time you went six months without sex you were probably sixteen years old." That comment got both my brother and Jysella laughing again.

I rolled my eyes in disgust. "Rumors, Jaden. Most of my reputation is built on rumors and innuendo."

I went to leave, but before I closed the door I turned to them and took a photo of the two in bed using Zylie's datapad imager. "Maybe I will text this photo to your dad, Jysella…or your brother."

"No!" she yelled as she jumped off the bed.

She chased after me, but I made it to my room and locked the door. "I'm just going to keep this photo as insurance that you don't pull that trick on me again!"

I chuckled as I thought of their lame excuse. _'Having sex'._ Ha! It is unlikely my brother would have the guts to seduce Jysella. Corran Horn is almost as scary as Talon Karrde.

.

.

**_Entry 121_ **

This weekend was the Fan-Expo HoloCon—a convention for science fiction and fantasy holofilms and shows. Dozens and dozens of holofilm actors and actresses were scheduled to be there to sign autographs and sell memorabilia. It is also a convention where people dress up as their favorite holocharacter. It's not unusual to see people dressed as pirates, bounty hunters, Jedi, Sith, adventurers, mythical creatures, or armored troopers.

I wasn't planning on going, but Zylie dragged me to the convention so she could get Dak Davin's autograph. Why? I have no idea. He is an actor who plays an action hero…such as a Jedi or a Jump Trooper. So, basically, he pretends to be someone like me or my father.

Still, I guess I can't blame Zylie. She grew up watching the adventures of Dak Davin, so there is a little hero worship going on. I wouldn't mind meeting Lelli Zararra. She is the holo-actress that plays a spy/slicer who works for the government to stop crime. I enjoy her holofilms, but I have to say she can't hold a candle to Zylie in the beauty department…or any department for that matter.

We are walking through the parking garage to the convention center when I sensed a disturbance in the Force. I felt like somebody was in trouble.

I turned to Zylie. "I think somebody is being mugged. Stay here."

Of course, Zylie is too stubborn to stay behind and she ended up following me. In a dark corner of the parking garage I saw a group of big, young men pushing around a smaller man. As I drew closer I thought I felt a familiar presence…the victim is somebody I met before. I looked back to Zylie who was a few steps behind me. "Is the guy getting shoved your friend Steben?"

She craned her neck to get a better look. "I think it is and I recognize his attackers. They're members of the college smashball team." She frowned. "Those jocks are always picking on the computer and information technology guys."

"I'll take care of this." I walked forward. "Hey! Leave him alone." I called out to get the men's attention. They shoved Steben to the ground and turned to give me the once over.

"Hey look what the gundark dragged in," one of the larger men sneered. "First we capture a Sith Lord and now we have a pantywaist Jedi wanabee."

The group of men moved closer to get a better look at me. "That is one crappy costume," one of the men commented. I looked down at my clothing and frowned. Okay, I wasn't wearing my classic Jedi robes, but I was wearing an authorized alternate uniform consisting of a lightweight black cloak, trousers and tunic along with my weapons belt. I thought I looked pretty good. The guy that insulted my outfit threw a thumb in Steben's direction. "Computer-boy here has a much better costume."

Steben slowly stood up and I could see he was unhurt. It appears the smashball team's mission was to terrorize and not necessarily injure any costumed fanboys they ran into. I looked over Steben's outfit and was impressed. It was an exact replica of the outfit used in some of the Sith holofilms I like. "Are you alright?"

He brushed himself off. "Yeah, these guys were just playing." He went to walk toward me but one of the brutes stopped him.

"Whoa, where are you going? Do you think we're scared of your Jedi boyfriend?" The man talking was obviously their leader–probably because he was kriff'n huge. He was about eight centimeters taller than me. Stang! He was almost as big as my father. The other eight men were equally massive and were not intimidated at all by my size. The leader of the group moved so he could see Zylie behind me and leered. "Who is she dressed up as? A Kuat Pleasure Slave? If so, I have something she could pleasure." He then grabbed his crotch and made an obscene gesture.

I could feel Zylie's temper flare and I had to stop her from moving toward the man. I wasn't positive what she planned to do, but I am fairly sure it involved her knee interacting violently with the man's groin. "I'll take care of this Zylie."

She glowered at me for a second, but then rolled her eyes. "Fine. Make it good."

I walked up to the nine towering men with my hands up in a placating gesture. "Hey guys. I'm just going to take my Sith Lord friend here and go into the convention center. There's no need for violence."

The men all laughed and took one step towards me before they found themselves floating five meters above the ground and pinned to the ceiling of the parking deck.

Ha! I bet they didn't see that one coming. To say they were shocked is an understatement.

"Kriff! This guy really is a Jedi!" one of the men screamed as he tried to push himself away from the roof of the parking garage.

I walked under the panicked men toward Steben. "Are you okay?"

"I am now." He gazed at me scrutinizing my face. "You're Talon, right? We met before."

I nodded.

"Thanks for helping." He looked up at the men floating above his head, yelling and begging to be let down. "What are you going to do with them? Please don't hurt them; they have a big game tomorrow."

His concern for these idiots caught me off guard, but after thinking about it, it made sense. Coruscanti University has the best smashball team in the galaxy. If word got out that the team was arrested or injured because they were picking on Steben it probably would make life miserable for the I.T. student. I looked up to the men floating above me and I could feel their panic. "Steben here says I shouldn't hurt you…even though you insulted my girlfriend."

"Hey man, I was just joking," the leader said. "We were just messing with the guy. We weren't going to hurt him."

I reached a hand up and made the leader float down until I could grab him by the boot. I then flipped him upside down so I could look him straight in the eye. He made a groaning sound as his equilibrium probably went swimming. I stopped his rotation when his head was even with mine. I could see the blood rush to his face as he floated upended two meters off the ground.

"I know who you are." I told the man in my best menacing tone. And I _did_ know who he was. Just by touching his boot, my postcognitive abilities let me know this man's name was Hak Wanti, twenty-years old, smashball captain for the _Coruscanti Scurge_. And since he wore those boots while meeting his girlfriend, I also became aware that he had a strange furry-fetish. He and his girlfriend would dress up like Edan Snowcats and make mewing sounds while they made out.

I stepped closer and whispered in his ear. "Listen Hak, I want you to promise me you are going to stop bullying people. Because if you don't I will find you and let everybody know about you and your little feline-sex kitten obsession. You wouldn't want those homemade holos you filmed with you and your girlfriend grooming each other to end up in the hands of your teammates, do you? That could happen. The man you were messing with is one of the top slicers on Coruscant. I am sure he could snatch those images right off your hard drive using his datapad and your passwords—which I conveniently happen to know. And he could do it before you had the chance to get back to the dorm to delete anything. Do you want that to happen?"

To be honest I have no idea if Steben can slice at all, but it doesn't hurt to put a little awe of computer geekdom into a bully. I also didn't know this man's passwords—I couldn't glean that from his boot—but he didn't need to know that either.

"No," he whispered back nervously.

"Maybe I'll get him to do it anyway just as insurance that you're not going to retaliate against him." I walked around the large man hanging upside down in front of me. "This is what is going to happen next. I am going to let you guys down; you are going to apologize to Steben and to my girlfriend and then you and your buddies are going to leave. If I hear you are bothering anyone again I will come back to have a little talk with you. Do you understand?"

He nodded that he understood. "Good." I looked up at the other men. "I guess I'll let you guys down now," I announced before I put them into a free fall. They screamed like little girls before I slowed their acceleration and gently set them down on the duracrete floor.

The leader quickly apologized to Steben and Zylie for his bad behavior and then they all ran off.

I turned back to Steben. "You let me know if they give you further problems." He nodded his head looking embarrassed. "What's wrong?"

He lowered his head. "I must look like a pathetic loser to you. Here I am dressing up like a Sith when you are an actual Jedi and Jump Trooper."

I gave him a good natured slap on the back. "No way. It's smart guys like you that keep the infrastructure of this city world working. And there is nothing wrong about being a holo-fan." I chuckled. "Don't tell anybody, but I'm a _Pirates of the Mist_ fanboy."

"Really?"

"Yeah, there is nothing wrong with being a fanboy." I glanced over to Zylie. "Or a fangirl." I turned my attention back to Steben and grinned. "Besides you are one brave man. There's not many people who would dare hit up on my girlfriend."

Steben's face turned white. "I didn't know she was dating anybody when I asked her out."

Zylie smacked me across the shoulder. "Knock it off Talon. Stop scaring him. You're almost as bad as the smashball team."

I looked at her sheepishly. "Yes, Dear." I turned back to Steben and gave him a knowing look. "She thinks she's my Jedi Master."

Zylie scowled at me. "Let's get inside before the line gets too long to see Dak Davin."

"Yes, my Master," I joked.

We went in and had a good time. Steben is a really nice guy. I like him.

Zylie got her Dak Davin autograph. Surprisingly Dak recognized me from the tabloids and ask me for my autograph. I thought that was funny.

"Dak Davin wanted my autograph," I bragged to Zylie. "Do you want my autograph?"

She rolled her eyes. "I am never going to hear the end this, am I? Do you think we can fit your ego into the speeder for the ride back?"

"I think so. It's my dad's air speeder and he got an extra big passenger compartment to accommodate his large frame."

She shook her head in disbelief.

Ha! This was fun.

Maybe next time I'll go dressed up as something other than a Jedi with a bad costume.


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AUTHOR NOTE: The next few posts deal with a time period that was covered in my fanfic: "Sacrifices". I think you should be able to understand it...at least as much as Talon understands it. In the story "Sacrifices" there are things that Talon Tantiss is never told. So he is a bit confused in the next few posts.

**_Entry 122_ **

Zylie is on a mid-semester school break for a week and she's asked me if I can give her a ride to her father's ship, the _Wild Karrde_. I really don't want her father to know we are dating this early in the relationship. I am a bit nervous about how he will react, but Zylie has a way of making me do things I don't want to do. I swear I am becoming more whipped than my father.

I end up borrowing a small shuttle from a friend and flying her out to the Kuat sector where Karrde's crew was doing some business.

We berthed the shuttle in a space dock orbiting Kuat and rendezvoused with the _Wild Karrde_.

Zylie was all excited about seeing her family. It was an excitement I didn't share. When we arrived to the boarding ramp of her father's ship I balked and turned to Zylie. "Maybe I should go home. I don't want to interrupt your reunion with your family."

She gave me a pouty look that always makes me feel like putty in her hands. "Talon, you can't hide from my parents indefinitely. Mom and Dad like you." She then grabbed my hand and practically dragged me up the ramp.

We were still holding hands as we entered the crew area. Talon Karrde and his wife Zara were sitting in the galley area sipping caf when we arrived. The two turned when they heard us enter the area. A broad smile crossed Karrde's face when he saw his daughter.

"Zylie!" He put down his cup of caf and stood to greet us. "Talon! It's good to see you also. Zylie said a friend was going to give her a ride home." I noticed Karrde's smile slipped from his face when he looked down and saw Zylie holding my hand. Zara must have noticed the change in her husband's demeanor. She gave him a curious look before her eyes followed her husband's gaze to where Zylie was clutching my now sweaty palm.

"Soooo," Karrde drew out the word. "What's going on?"

Before I could say anything Zylie answered. "Talon and I are dating." She gave her father a big grin. I silently groaned. I think my young teenage girlfriend is enjoying this meeting way too much.

Karrde slowly looked up from our clasped hands so he could stare at me straight in the eye. "You don't say." The way he said the words made me think an Endorian Ogre would have been a more welcomed suitor for his daughter than me "When did you two start dating?"

"We met up with each other when I first got to the University, but we started dating about a month ago." Zylie told her father enthusiastically.

Zara rose out of her seat to stand next to her husband, all the time gazing at me warily. "That's wonderful. I'm happy for you two." That's what she said, but through the Force I could feel great apprehension coming from the couple.

We all stood there for an awkward moment before Zylie broke the silence. "Mom, Dad, give Talon a break. I'm still a virgin if that is what you are worried about Daddy!"

Talon Karrde blushed fiercely. "I don't need to know about your sex life…"

"Or lack of," Zylie added quickly as she moved away from me so she could search the galley cooler for food or drink.

Karrde closed his eyes and took a calming breath. When he opened them he gave me a smile and offered me his hand. "Thanks for bringing Zylie home, please feel free to stay. There is an extra bunk in Chin's room."

I nervously shook his hand. "Thank you."

Karrde turned to his wife and gave her a smile. "Let's scrounge up some food for these kids."

We ate and talked and I started to feel a little better about this meeting.

It went a lot better than I expected. At least Karrde didn't release the vornskrs on me.

 

**_Entry 123_ **

Zylie and I spent the next day taking in the scenery on Kuat. We visited the Tekshar Falls and then a local casino where we took in a show. When we arrived back to the _Wild Karrde_ we both were in good spirits, but as soon as I stepped on the boarding ramp I could tell there was a problem. I could sense anxiety permeating among the crew. I hesitantly walked up the boarding ramp, reaching out with my senses trying to determine if there was danger inside.

Zylie gave me a puzzled look. "What is it?"

I shook my head. "I don't know. It feels like everybody on board is upset about something." Zylie went to enter the craft, but I put out my arm blocking her. "Let me go first, just in case."

It looked like she was going to protest, but she finally nodded and let me lead the way. As I entered I called out for Karrde, Zara or the crew. I was relieved when Zylie's father came to the ramp.

"Is everything alright?" I asked nervously.

Talon Karrde grimaced. "We're fine, but we have bad news about your Aunt Mara."

I remember a cold feeling running down my spine. We were Jedi and we were always in danger. I knew someday one of my loved ones might not come back from a mission. "Is she okay?"

My heart sank when Karrde shook his head. "She's in a medical bay of the GA Star Destroyer heading back to Coruscant. She was with Jacen, Ben and your father when she was injured on Kavan in the Hapes Cluster." He motioned for me to follow him. "Talon, I need to talk to you in private." He looked over to his daughter. "Sorry Zylie, some of what I have to tell him is secret Jedi business."

I expected Zylie to protest, but she didn't. "Okay, I'll be in my cabin."

"Come on," he said to me as he walked me to his cabin. He looked inside to make sure his wife was not there before he motioned me in and locked the door behind us. "Sit down."

I sat down on a bunk as Karrde dropped down on a cushioned chair next to a writing table. "This is what I know and the information comes from your father and Ben." He ran a hand through his hair nervously and blew out a calming breath before he began. "According to your father, your cousin Jacen has turned to the darkside and tried to kill your Aunt Mara."

My jaw dropped and for a moment I thought this was the worst practical joke that has ever been pulled on me. "I don't believe it."

"You don't have to believe it, just know your father believes it. He captured Jacen and they're currently on a ship headed for my smuggler's base on Myrkr." Karrde hesitated for a moment. "That isn't even the worst news."

I gave an incredulous scoff. "How can it be worse? My Aunt is injured, my cousin turned dark, what else can go wrong?"

Karrde averted his eyes. "Your father said your aunt was poisoned with the toxin Malkite Therfar."

I shook my head. "That's impossible, no one can survive that poison."

"That's the rub. She didn't survive. According to your father she died. He had to use a Sith resurrection technique to save her. When I talked to your father…he had the eyes of a Sith."

For a second I wondered how my dad knew a Sith resurrection technique, but then I remembered he had Palpatine's memories. Still, the story was hard to believe. "So my father and my cousin are both darksiders?"

Karrde shrugged. "Your dad didn't appear to be evil when I talked to him, except when he stunned a shackled Jacen for talking."

"My dad stunned Jacen?"

"It looks like he did a little more than stun him. His face was bloodied and bruised. Mark wants me to contact your brother and have Jaden meet him at the base."

My brow furrowed in confusion. "Why Jaden? Cilghal would be a better choice."

Karrde gave me a sheepish look. "He said he wants to make sure things are secure before the Jedi get there, but my guess is he wants to get Jacen medical help before the rest of the Jedi see him."

"Ohh," I winced at the thought of my father beating Jacen. My dad is usually a big softy when it comes to his family, but if my father thought Jacen tried to kill Mara I wouldn't be surprised if he totally lost it and tried to beat the Sith out of my cousin. "I'll go get Jaden and bring him to Myrkr. Can you get Zylie home?"

Karrde nodded. "I'll get Chin to fly her back to school after her break. Don't worry about anything. Just go help your father."

I stood. "I guess I'll go say goodbye to Zylie and get back to Coruscant."

Karrde unlocked the door and followed me out of the cabin. "Take care of yourself Talon. I don't need anything happening to you."

I gave Zylie's dad a confused smile. "Why is that?"

Karrde smirked. "If you end up hurt or dead I don't think my daughter would ever believe I wasn't the one who put you in that condition."

I stared at him slack jawed for a moment. "Umm…thanks, I guess."

Karrde laughed and waved me off. "Go help your dad."

.

.

**_Entry 124_ **

When I talked to Zylie I only told her I had to leave because my Aunt was poisoned and hospitalized on a Star Destroyer. I left out everything else. She was very upset, but also a bit suspicious of her father's story. She thought it was possible he concocted the incident to get rid of me (Ironically, this is after weeks of Zylie insisting her parents really like me and would accept our relationship). I eventually convinced her that her father didn't manufacture the story to shoo me off. I kissed her goodbye and then returned to my shuttle and set a course for Coruscant.

.

.

**_Entry 125_ **

When I arrived to the Temple I immediately went to my parents' quarters. My brother was there trying to comfort my mother who was understandably upset. It turns out that between hyperspace jumps my father finally called her.

My mother was trembling as she told me her story. "His eyes are all yellow and he stunned Jacen while we were talking."

I remember thinking, _'Again?!'_ Dad must be really furious with Jacen is he is stunning him all the time.

"I thought he killed him at first." My mother was in near hysterics. "He doesn't want me to tell Luke where he's going until he gets to Myrkr. He wants Jaden to meet him there." She looked over to my brother who was sitting on her couch looking despondent. "I don't want Jaden to go alone. If Jacen really turned to the darkside, he could be dangerous…even on a Force-void planet like Myrkr." She turned to me. "You need to go with your brother."

"Hey, I'm a Jedi also, Mom," Jaden protested.

"You're a healer, not a fighter." She gave me a pleading look. "You'll go with him, won't you?"

I gave her a forced smile. "Of course. I'll go and make sure Dad's okay."

"And make sure he doesn't hurt Jacen. The poor boy looked like he was trampled by dewbacks."

"I'll make sure."

My mother's eyes narrowed. "He said he'd call Luke when he gets planet side, but if he doesn't I'm going to tell the Jedi where he's at. Luke needs to know what's going on."

I shrugged. "Let's tell him now."

Mom shook her head. "Your father wants you two there before the Jedi arrive." She thought about it for a while before reaching a decision. "I'll wait until you two are underway, but then I'm telling Luke."

I looked to my brother. "I guess we should go then."

.

.

**_Entry 126_ **

My brother and I finagled our way aboard the Temple Shuttle named _Jedi Sentinel_. Jaden had planned to go to a medical conference this week and luckily had a shuttle request in. We simply asked for the ship a couple days earlier than scheduled. Hopefully the early departure wouldn't cause anybody to ask any questions. We wanted to get to Myrkr as fast and covertly as possible.

I helped my brother carry his medical bags to the ship. Jaden was quieter than usual. He was worried about my aunt, our cousin and especially our father.

"I talked to Ben and he said Dad scared him while on Kavan," Jaden said softly. "He had wild yellow eyes and was really angry."

My brother's voice was full of dread. I knew what he was worried about. We both grew up hearing the story about how the Emperor Reborn temporarily possessed my father's body. When the Sith Lord's spirit was forced out of him my dad discovered he had retained Palatine's memories and knowledge. If my dad ever turned to the darkside he could do major damage to the galaxy. Palpatine had brought on the purge of the entire Jedi order…what could my dad do if he went dark?

"Don't worry Jaden. Dad used the darkside to save Aunt Mara. That doesn't sound like the actions of an evil Sith." I said the words, but deep down I was also worried. We stored his gear in the cargo hold and then walked to the cockpit. I dropped into the pilot seat and started our preflight prep.

My brother glanced over to me from the copilot chair. "No, it doesn't sound like something a Sith would do. But I also can't believe Jacen would do anything to hurt his family."

My shoulders drooped. "That _is_ hard to believe. It could be that dad is wrong about Jacen." I drew a deep breath. "But you have to remember how Jacen's been acting for the last few years. First he starts getting withdrawn and secretive. Then he disappears for to search for Force knowledge and when he comes back he discovers the woman he's secretly been in love with for years gave birth to somebody else's kid." I activated the engines and called in the departure request.

My brother looked over to me. "I can't see that turning him dark. Jacen didn't appear too upset over Tenel Ka's baby. I mean, he was shocked and upset at first, but within days he seemed back to normal."

I guided the ship out of the Temple hanger bay and plotted a course to upper orbit. "Could the child be his?"

My brother thought about it. "That would necessitate Jacen actually having sex with Tenel Ka."

"Yeah, like that's going to happen." I scoffed. "She probably got tired of waiting around for Jacen to make the first move. Her old biological clock was ticking and you know what they say, any port in a storm."

"Isn't that what _you_ say?"

I shook my head. "Not anymore. I think my strange port docking days are over."

My brother grinned and made the sound of a lightwhip. "Zylie has you so whipped already."

"Please." I said scathingly, but secretly I knew he was right. She was amazingly seductive for a virgin. Not that I doubt her claim of purity…it's just hard to believe that she has managed to manipulate me around her little finger. Me! Talon Tantiss the man who the sleemo holonet claims is the heartbreaker of the galaxy. I shrugged my shoulders noncommittally. "If you are going to be whipped it might as well be by a smoking hot woman." I turned and gave my brother a knowing look. "What do you have? The only female in your bed at night is your pitten Fuzzy."

Jaden rolled his eyes. "I noticed she sleeps with you now."

"Jealous?

"Yes. But don't worry about me. I have a lady friend."

"Who?"

"None of your business. All I'll say is she is very beautiful."

"Liar."

"Yeah, you keep thinking that."

I brought the ship out of the planet's atmosphere and punched in the hyperdrive coordinates. Our next stop was Myrkr.


	29. Chapter 29

**_Entry 127_ **

We arrived to Myrkr without any problems. As I approached the landing pad I noticed my father had company. Alongside my father's hideously modified shuttle (imagine a Z-95 Headhunter and a family shuttle got married and had a horribly deformed baby…and that would be my father's modified ship) there was a shiny silver starship. I wasn't sure who it belonged to, but I was impressed by its sleek lines and armament.

I landed our shuttle next to the silvery ship and prepared to debark. I helped my brother get his bags out of the storage compartments and then lowered the ramp. I turned back to Jaden and smirked. "Mom said to keep you safe. So I'm going down to talk to Darth Daddy."

My brother rolled his eyes and waved me off. I walked to the boarding ramp and surveyed my surroundings. I've never been to Myrkr before and now I know why the Jedi hate the planet. It felt like somebody turned off the Force. It was an unnerving feeling. I looked down the ramp to the main building and saw my father waiting for me.

Even from a distance I could see his yellow tinged eyes and it made me shiver. I have always seen my dad as a gentle giant and my protector, but for the first time I saw him as the enemy might view my dad. He is an imposing figure at almost 2.15 meters in height. His 125 kilograms frame is pure muscle, with broad shoulders, a barrel chest and arms that are as big as some men's legs. For a fleeting moment I wondered if my mother wanted me to come to Myrkr not to protect my brother from Jacen…but my own father.

My dad looked up to me and gave a big smile. I felt a huge sense of relief flood my body when I saw his smiling face. After all, Sith don't smile…do they? I quickly moved down the ramp to greet him. As I approached, I started wondering about those Sith-stained eyes. Being on Myrkr and cut off from the Force you would think his eyes would return to normal even if he was a full blown Sith. I thought that was extremely odd.

"Hey Dad," I said with a smile trying to sound as upbeat as possible.

My father walked up to me and gave my shoulder a squeeze. "It's good to see you Talon." He looked up to the ship. "Did you bring Jaden?"

"He's on board and packing up his medical field gear. I thought I would come down and check out the situation first."

My dad frowned. "Did you tell your brother to stay inside the ship until you determined if I went to the dark side or not?"

I really couldn't deny my father's accusation, because that was exactly what I was doing, but seeing the disappointment in my father's eyes calmed my fears some more. After all, a real Sith wouldn't care if his son didn't trust him.

I gave my father a reassuring grin. "Dad, we all know you can't go Sith."

"And why is that?"

"Because Mom didn't give you permission to do so," I said with a chuckle trying to lighten the mood.

He shook his head and scowled at me. "I don't do everything you mother tells me."

"Sure you don't," I said sarcastically.

Jaden came down the ramp burdened down with medical bags. My father quickly grabbed his gear and helped him carry it inside. We thought we were going to see Jacen, but dad said there was somebody else who needed immediate medical attention. He brought us down the hall to a bunkroom where I met the owner of the mysterious silver ship. It was a middle-aged woman with graying red hair and a face that probably was once beautiful, but was now covered with bruises and blood. She was lying prone on the bed, her upper torso severely burned from blaster fire and with blood pooling around her body. It didn't take my brother very long to declare her dead.

My dad told us it was Lumiya the Dark Lady of the Sith. She had come to Myrkr to ' _Fetch her apprentice, Jacen_.' Of course, my father had told her there was no way in hell she was going to take Jacen. She pulled out a lightwhip and dad pulled out a blaster. Unfortunately for Lumiya, without the Force a blaster in the hands of a battle hardened Jump Trooper/Jedi always beats out a lightwhip.

She probably wouldn't have a chance even if she had the Force. I am pretty sure my father is so used to being whipped by a woman that he's probably immune by now. Ha! Sorry, I know I shouldn't make light of the situation. It's just everything is so totally kriffed up that it's almost comical…almost.

As we turned to leave my dad inquired about my Aunt Mara's medical status.

"The neurotoxin that poisoned her is almost totally flushed from her system," Jaden told him. "Her minor cuts and scrapes have healed. She should be taken out of her induced coma any day now…which will be none-too-soon. There are a lot of rumors going around about you, Jacen and the dark side. Uncle Luke wants answers and he is not too happy with you going transceiver silent."

My father shook his head. "I would like some answers, also." He walked out of the room and moved down the corridor. "Jacen is down here."

He led us down the hall to a room where he had secured my cousin. As we neared the door I could hear the clanging of chain on metal. When we entered the room we found Jacen with one hand cuffed to his bed's metal headboard and trying his best to break free. I was shocked by my cousin's appearance. He had a black eye and his face was swollen. My dad really put the hurt on him.

I look over to my father and notice he was glaring at Jacen, almost like he wanted to beat him some more. "Knock it off Jacen unless you want me to stun you again." My father warned him as he pulled out his blaster for emphasis.

When Jacen flinched at the sight of the blaster Jaden turned our father. "Dad! How many times have you stunned him?"

Dad shrugged. "I don't know two or three times so far."

Jaden shook his head in disbelief. "Repeated stunning can scramble neurons and cause brain damage."

My father laughed and said he thought Jacen already had brain damage, because otherwise he wouldn't have trained with a known Sith. This got Jacen angry and despite the fact that a Sith Lord was lying dead at the end of the hall, he adamantly denied that he was working with Lumiya.

He not only denied it, he accused my father of being Sith, pointing out my dad's yellow eyes as clear evidence. Jacen even alleged that Jaden and I were conspiring with our ' _Dark Lord father'_ to mount a Tantiss family Sith takeover of the galaxy. Stang! I think my father scrambled his neurons one too many times. Why would I want to take over the galaxy? That sounds like too much kriff'n work.

My brother gave Jacen a brief physical and tried to patch him up as best he could. Jaden said that despite his horrid appearance Jacen just had facial bruising, nothing broken.

Jacen continued to try to escape and berate my brother and I for not letting him go. Eventually, my brother decided to sedate him. Jacen wasn't too happy about that.

.

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**_Entry 128_ **

After Jacen was knocked out, my dad explained to us what was going on. A couple weeks ago dad had seen Jacen with Lumiya in the temple…although my father at the time wasn't positive it was Lumiya (he was relying on Palpatine's memories since he never met the woman). The same day Luke thought he felt the presence of Lumiya in the Temple. Having two Jedi Masters sense Lumiya in the Jedi Academy put them on high alert and Jacen under suspicion. It wasn't known if Jacen was deliberately working with a Sith or he was being tricked by the Dark Lady. The Grand Master didn't want to accost my cousin and drive him deeper undercover. Instead, Jacen was put under surveillance and a tracking device placed on his StealthX.

When Jacen left Coruscant our Aunt Mara followed him. When Ben realized his mother had left (Uncle Luke was off planet at the time) he decided to follow her and my dad went with him. They ended up on Kavan where they found Mara dead, but Dad saved her using a Sith resurrection technique. The process brought darkside energy swirling through him and changed his eyes yellow. The fact that they remain yellow my father thought was a result of chemical changes in the iris dye he uses to change his light blue eyes to a dark green color. He thought the yellow would stay until he dyed his irises again.

After my dad revived Mara, Ben brought his unconscious mother to a hospital while my dad went after the killer…who he says was Jacen because he found Jacen not far from Aunt Mara's body and Jacen's footprints were at the site of my Aunt's attack. My dad had his ysalamiri with him so Jacen was unable to use the Force once my father tracked him down and captured him.

My dad decided the best place to imprison a Sith is on Myrkr. Seeing that Jacen's Master came to get him, I think dad did the right thing.

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**_Entry 129_ **

Mom must have told Uncle Luke where dad was only hours after our departure because the _Jade Shadow_ landed on Myrkr early that evening carrying Uncle Luke, Jaina and Ben. My cousin Jaina was the first person to enter the room where Jacen was being held. She took one look at her brother's bruised face and was _pissed_. Stang! She was not happy with Jaden and me. Let's just say she is no longer a fan of the Tantiss family and she made damn sure we knew it.

Ben came into the room behind her. He looked at Jacen's unconscious body cuffed to the bed and frowned. "Your dad did a number on him, didn't he?"

I started to get irritated that everybody seemed so kriff'n concerned about Jacen. "He tried to kill your mom, do you blame dad?"

"No!" Jaina burst out. "My brother would never do that!"

"Are you calling our dad a liar?" I asked angrily. I turned to Ben. "Tell her what happened."

Ben shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know what happened. I found my mother dead and your dad brought her back to life. I don't know who killed her. It could have been Lumiya."

Right about then Jacen started to come out of sedation. He was a little loopy and was gazing at everybody with a lost look on his face.

A few minutes later my dad and Uncle Luke entered the room. My father was wearing his leather carrying harness where his pet ysalamiri sat perched on his shoulder. I can only assume that was to reassure the Skywalkers and Jaina that the situation was safe, despite his yellow Sith eyes.

Jacen's eyes went wide when he saw my father. "Watch out Luke! Mark's Sith!" Jacen managed to croak out hoarsely. He started pulling on his restraint while claiming my dad was going to kill everybody.

Jaina made the big mistake of leaning over her brother to try to calm him down. Jacen took the opportunity to grab her blaster with his free hand and without hesitation he aimed and shot my father at point blank range.

When the weapon discharged my dad jerked his hand up in a defensive manner. I cringed knowing the ysalamiri on my dad's shoulder would prevent him from performing Force deflection or absorption—a technique to defend against blaster fire without the use of a saber.

But then the impossible happened. The blaster bolt hit my father's hand. The burning energy glowed and spread around his wrist and down his arm before it harmlessly dissipated. Before Jacen could get a second shot off the blaster was suddenly jerked out of his grip by some unseen force.

I watched in total disbelief as the blaster landed in my father's hand. "Why'd you have to do that Jacen?" My dad said softly as he turned Jaina's blaster over in his hands inspecting it. He looked up at my cousin and gave him a wane smile. "You have been wrong about so many things…and one thing is your assumption that I can't touch the Force."

With that said my father raised the blaster and fired. We could only standby in disbelief as the blaster bolt streaked toward Jacen and impacted against his chest making my cousin go limp.

I thought I just witnessed a murder. Then a horrible thought crossed my mind. My father told me his eyes were still yellow because of chemical alterations in the iris dye he used. I accepted that explanation because I thought he was cut off from the Force. But that's not true. My dad somehow can touch the Force, despite the presence of the ysalamiri. Did that mean Jacen was right? Was my dad Sith? Did my father apprentice himself under Lumiya and then killed his Master? What the kriff was going on!?

I felt a coldness creep up my spine as I turned and gazed into my father's yellow tinged eyes. I still get the shakes thinking about that moment.

I need to stop for now. I'm going to see if Jaden has something to calm my nerves. I will write more in this journal later.

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**_Entry 130_ **

When Jacen was shot my mind was racing so fast that time actually appeared to slow down…like a holofilm put in slow motion. I've experienced this type of altered time perception a few times before while under very stressful combat conditions. I always thought adrenaline sped up the function of the brain so I could react faster, but my brother told me that wasn't the case. He said while the actual event was happening I was experiencing time normally. It is later when I remember the incident that I over estimate the duration of the event. It has something to do with the part of the brain that makes memories going into overdrive. Jaden said our brain sees these denser memories and assumes the only way so much information could have been remembered is if a longer time had elapsed…it is all a memory illusion that results from our brain interpreting things incorrectly (my brother loves showing off his medical expertise).

I really don't care what the reason is for the phenomenon, to me _time slowed down._ I don't care what my physician brother says. I saw the blaster bolt slide across the room and hit my cousin. I turned to my father and gazed into his creepy jaundice eyes and started to wonder if he might actually be Sith. I saw my brother and Jaina lean over Jacen to check his vitals. I also noticed my Uncle's hand move towards his lightsaber which caused me to panic more than the possibility of having a Sith father. My brain must have unconsciously interpreted that as a threat to my family because without thinking my hand instinctively went to my blaster. Ben must have seen my movement because he brought his hand up to hover above the butt of his weapon. For probably a second or two we had the Jedi version of a _Corellian Standoff_ going on (although in hindsight it was probably just everybody flinching. I know I never intended on shooting anybody).

Fortunately my dad broke the tension before anything awful happened. He lowered the blaster and let out an obvious sigh of relief. "Stupid Sith," he muttered under his breath before he looked around and realized everybody was staring at him in silent trepidation.

"What?" he asked. "It's on stun." He pointed at the blaster setting. "I stunned him."

Sometimes I wonder about my father. Did he really think that's the only reason we were all speechless and ready to pull blasters on each other? **He's yellow-eyed and apparently blaster-proof!** Didn't he think that would freak us out just a little bit? I wish this journal program had icons because I would put some _'sarcastic rolling eyes'_ right about here.

After we realized Jacen wasn't dead the tension eased in the room although we were still in shock. Jaden was the first to come out of his stupor. "Shavit Dad, I told you to stop stunning him."

" _He_ had the blaster set to _kill_ ," Dad defended himself. "I just stunned him. I don't know why everybody is upset."

"It's not that," my Uncle Luke said slowly. "Mark, none of us can feel the Force. A forest filled with ysalamiri surrounds us and you have one on your shoulder. How did you do, what you just did?"

"Oh, that." My dad said with a chuckle while rubbing the back of his neck nervously. "Over the last few years the ysalamiri's effect on me has slowly diminished." He pointed to Jacen. "That's how I knew Jacen was lying when he said he didn't attack Mara."

"I still don't believe it," Jaina defended her brother. "He would never hurt Aunt Mara."

Luke looked at Jaina sadly as he held up his comlink indicating a message came in earlier (Dad later told me that Cilghal called while they were out in the hall). "It's true Jaina. Mara woke up and confirmed it was Jacen who attacked her."

The blood appeared to drain from Jaina's face as she slowly sat down on the floor and stared at her brother in disbelief.

"What should we do now?" my father asked.

Luke frowned and gave a soft sigh. "Sedate and secure Jacen for now until we find out exactly what's going on."

Uncle Luke then asked to talk to my father in private. Jaina protested, saying my father might not be safe to be around. Uncle Luke tried to reassure her by saying, "Jaina, if Mark can utilize the Force on this planet he could have killed us seconds after we walked out of the _Shadow_ ".

I silently chuckled to myself. Those are such reassuring words (and I say that sarcastically). I have to ask Ben if his father comforted him like that when he was a kid. I can imagine a toddler Ben saying, "Dad, I think there is a monster in my closet." And Luke replying, "Son, if there was actually a monster in your room he would have killed you and eaten your entrails by now…so go to sleep." Ha!

But I guess Uncle Luke is right. If my father was Sith there wouldn't be a damn thing we could do to stop him from killing us all…although I'd hope he wouldn't kill his sons…or at least me. Hey, he did say I was his favorite.

Seriously, I feel a little embarrassed for doubting my father earlier. My dad would never become Sith—mainly because of my mother. And I am not making any aspersions on my father's manhood by saying so, because my mom in reality doesn't boss him around (my dad is just easy going).

My dad would never go Sith because he loves my mother so much he would never do anything to strain that relationship. When they're together I can feel love and affection oozing through the Force. Sensing all that mushiness was a was a bit disconcerting when I a young boy, but now I find it heartening. Although split-ups are rare amongst married Jedi, the divorce rate for Jump Troopers is about seventy percent. I've seen a lot of broken homes and I consider myself lucky to be in an intact family.

I'm digressing. I guess I am still trying to absorb and comprehend what has just happened.

Right now, it looks like my cousin started training with a Sith and he killed my aunt. My father had to temporarily go darkside to save my aunt and then my father killed the evil Sith Lumiya and captured Jacen. Finally, we discover my father is immune to the Force-voiding effects of the ysalamiri (probably because he lived with a pet ysalamiri for almost thirty years)…and he stunned Jacen _again._

Damn! Jacen is sure to become brain damaged if my dad keeps stunning him all the time.


	30. Chapter 30

**_Entry 131_ **

Jacen remained sedated until Uncle Luke could figure out what to do with him. I tried to talk to Jaina about the situation, but she is depressed and doesn't want to talk to me.

I had decided to raid the kitchen to see if there was anything to eat when I ran into my father. I was chewing a ration bar and drinking some bottled water when he crooked a finger in my direction. "Talon, I need to talk to you…privately."

' _Crap. What did I do now?'_ I thought worriedly, but then I thought, ' _Why the hell am I worried? Nothing I have done recently can compare to this Sith-storm of bantha crap that has been dumped on my family in the last few days. I haven't gone darkside or shot any family members…so I should be home free'._

I nodded my head and followed my dad outside into the warm afternoon air.

"So…," dad said slowly. "I heard you are dating Zylie Karrde."

' _Opps'._ I guess I should have told my parents about that. "Yes we are…who told you?"

"Her father told me." My dad said matter-of-factly. "Karrde said you were on his ship a few days ago. I was just wondering why you didn't mention anything to me or your mother about it."

"I wasn't hiding the relationship, if that's what you're thinking. I happened to see her while on Coruscant a few months ago. She was happy to see me. We're old friends. She's on school break this week and asked me if I could give her a ride to her father's ship." I gave my father a questioning look. "Did Karrde say he didn't want me dating her?" My stomach started to feel queasy. Zylie's parents seemed to have warmed up to the idea that I was courting their daughter; maybe I was wrong about that.

"It's not that," dad said as he pointed to a low retaining wall. "Sit down, Talon."

I sat on the duracrete wall while my father paced back and forth. "Talon, you were named after Zylie's father. He is one of my closest friends."

I gave my father a guarded look. "I know that Dad." I shifted on the wall nervously not knowing exactly where he was going with this conversation. "Do _you_ have a problem with me dating Zylie?"

Dad blew out an exasperated breath. "No, I have a problem with you possibly breaking Talon's little girl's heart. I know your reputation as a womanizer."

I scoffed. "Dad, the HoloNet sleemos make up ninety-five percent of the sordid stories they write about me."

He laughed. "Yes, I know. It's the other five percent I'm worried about."

I shook my head. "Dad, I'm not out breaking hearts."

He gave me a dubious smile. "You mean you haven't went through, let's see…" he started counting out on his fingers. "Three or four relationships in the last year alone?"

I shook my head in disbelief. Obviously somebody in the Intelligence Corps had been feeding my father information about me dating female officers while on deployment (this was prior to me meeting up with Zylie). "No, they weren't relationships. I made it quite clear to those women I didn't want any commitments. I'm not ready to settle down. I simply wanted some female company."

Dad scoffed. "That sounds like a kriff-call to me."

I laughed. "Of course it is, they're using me for my body." I joked. "I almost never initiate contact with the women. They come up to me." I made a sweeping gesture with my hand down my body. "I can't help it if I inherited the Skywalker good looks and your muscular build."

Dad rolled his eyes. "So then you told Zylie that she's just a Kriff buddy?"

I bristled at the insinuation. "No I didn't tell her that, because it's not true," I gritted my teeth in anger. "Don't talk about her like that. She's a nice girl."

Force! I must be in love. I have never felt so irritated with my father before. I actually felt like punching him. I looked away and took a calming breath. "Dad, I really like her. She absolutely is _not_ impressed that I am a Jedi. She sees _me_ …me, not the Jedi robes, not the prestige of being a member of the Jedi Order." I paused for a moment. "She sees only me, Talon Tantiss. Dad, we're old friends that were reunited. I am not going to screw up this relationship." I hesitated for a moment. "In fact, we're not having sex."

My father's eyes widened with shock. "What! This must be serious." He then leaned forward and gave me a withering glare. "I like the idea of you going slow, but you better not be seeing other women while dating Zylie…to satisfy those needs. That will hurt her just as much."

"No!" I protested, offended by the suggestion. I may have dated a number of women, but only one at a time. I'm not a cheating sleemo! Not even when I dated Nalli'ti who probably couldn't have cared less if I did. "I wouldn't do that to her and I definitely wouldn't want to get on the bad side of her father."

My dad gave me a wary look. "Good, because Talon Karrde is not a man to be trifled with. He's the only person in the galaxy that I know of that has not only killed a Sith Lord, but he captured a Jedi Master. And he did it all without the Force. Just keep that in mind."

"I will, Dad," I promised my father. Stang! I was little irked that he believed I would do anything to hurt Zylie. He must _really_ believe those sleemo holozine stories about me if he's worried about my love life when we're dealing with a dead Sith, a fallen Jedi and my dad's brush with the darkside.

I guess that is more proof that dad isn't Sith. A Sith wouldn't give a damn if I broke a young girl's heart. I guess I shouldn't be too upset with my father. I do have a horrible reputation—it's unearned—but it's still terrible.

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**_Entry 132_ **

My dad and Uncle Luke spent a long time talking to Jacen and trying to figure out why he did what he did. After they told him my Aunt Mara was alive and talking, Jacen reluctantly admitted to training with Lumiya, but he insisted he didn't try to kill my Aunt Mara. He thought he was using a tranquilizer dart that would cause memory loss and unconsciousness, not a poison that would kill her. He said he used it in an attempt to escape my aunt. He needed to remain free because Lumiya told him he had some great destiny to save the universe. My dad said he could sense the truthfulness behind his words, so I believe him. That takes a load off my mind. It was awful that it happened, but the fact that he never intended to kill my Aunt Mara made me feel a little better.

Of course he actually did try to kill my father and I am not too happy about that, but my dad said I should forgive Jacen. He truly was confused and really thought my dad turned Sith. My father later admitted to me that he hadn't been exactly straightforward and forthcoming with Jacen after his told Jacen my Aunt Mara was dead and his eyes were yellow because he was angry that Jacen murdered her…not because he used a Sith resurrection technique to revive didn't want Jacen to know she survived because he thought my cousin would become desperate if he knew he left a witness behind…and a desperate fallen Jedi is a lot more dangerous than one who thinks he can talk his way out of the situation.

Of course, this really confused Jacen because he thought he just knocked my Aunt Mara out with a tranquilizer dart. He truly believed my father went Sith and killed my Aunt and was trying to pin the murder on him. I know that probably doesn't make a bit of sense. It appears people were doing a lot of things based on false assumptions.

I don't think we are going to get any further clarification though. Jacen has shut down and refused to answer more questions. He did say he no longer wants to be a Jedi Knight and requested that he be immediately removed from the Order. He is so insistant on officially leaving the Jedi Order that I honestly think he is doing it to distance himself in an attempt to _protect_ the Order. This makes me question my father's belief that Jacen is a fallen Jedi. It also makes me wonder what he did that is so bad that he feels the need to distance himself. Right now he only hurt or attempted to kill family members. I know that is extremely bad, but the public doesn't know about this as far as I know. His Sith Master is dead, he doesn't seem to have the Sith mentality…why doesn't he just confess all and come back to the Order and his family? This problem should be over and done with as far as I'm concerned. There is no law against training with a Sith. If his family isn't going to press changes for assault or attempted murder, then what's the problem?

Unfortunately, the problem is Jacen. Jacen is hiding something; he absolutely will not tell anybody why he and Lumiya met on Kavan. Until we know all the truth, how can we trust him? Since he admitted just about everything else, he must be concealing something damning. I'm not sure what it is, but I have a guess.

My brother told me that a couple days ago a plague started on Hapes and it is killing members of the Royal Family…and coincidently Kavan is part of the Hapes Consortium. Something tells me that there may be a link. I am wondering if Lumiya was trying to kill Tenel Ka. Did Jacen irritate his new 'Master' and she decided to punish him by killing his long time friend, the Queen Mother? It was possible.

But…if that were true, then why wouldn't Jacen tell the Grand Master? I believe it is because Jacen knows the Hapan people and how they think. If Lumiya was proven to be the person who initiated the plague, anybody associated with her would be seen as coconspirators…meaning Jacen. Jacen would become an enemy to the Hapan people and this may affect how the Hapans treat anybody associated with Jacen to include the Jedi and even Tenel Ka herself.

Jacen must believe the news is out that he trained with Lumiya (as far as I know the public is unaware) and is hiding Lumiya's connection to the plague to protect everybody else from Hapan retaliation, including himself. In case the truth does get out he wants to be out of the Order so there is not a backlash against the Jedi.

This is just a theory though. Unless Jacen fesses up I doubt we will ever have an answer.

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**_Entry 133_ **

Jacen was allowed to eat and shower that afternoon, but somebody had to guard him at all times. When I pulled my shift I had my blaster set on stun and followed him around from the dayroom to the fresher and sometimes the kitchen. He didn't want to talk to me, but I wasn't going to let him off that easy. He tried to kill my father and I deserved answers.

We were both sitting in the dayroom watching some crappy local holovid channel. Myrkr is awful when it comes to entertainment. There is the History Channel and another channel that plays insipid game shows. I looked over to my cousin. "I'm pretty pissed at you for shooting my dad."

Jacen sighed as his head dropped miserably. "I already told you, I thought he was Sith. I thought I was saving my family."

"Before that, you accused me and Jaden of being Sith conspirators. What in the Hell did I ever do to you to make you think I'd gone dark?"

I was surprised when one side of Jacen's lips curled up in a smile. "Well, you did put a Crystal Snake in my toilet."

I really wanted to be mad at my cousin, but I burst out laughing. "I _was_ acting pretty Sith-like that day."

He gave a dry chuckle before falling silent again.

"I heard your parents are on their way."

That news elicited a moan from my cousin. I guess he's not looking forward to facing his mom and dad.

"Dad said you are hiding something." I paused for a long moment wondering if I should ask the question. "Jacen, did Lumiya start the plague on Hapes?"

His head popped up and he stared at me intensely. "Why would you ask that?"

I shrugged. "You and Lumiya were on Kavan. Kavan is next to Hapes and the plague started a couple days after you were captured by my dad."

I noticed all the color drained from his face and it looked like he was going to be sick. He stood and started walking toward the exit. "Where are you going?"

"To bed," Jacen replied.

"Jacen, if she started the plague to punish you, tell Uncle Luke. Get everything out in the open so we can put all this garbage behind us. I don't think the public knows you trained with her…this has stayed within the family as far as I know. Confess everything and we can be a family again. I know Aunt Mara will forgive you and my dad's already forgiven you."

Jacen leaned against the dayroom wall as he let out a frustrated breath. I could see he was having trouble retaining his composure. "I know they will forgive me and I know they will stand by me…and that's the problem. That's why I can't tell them everything." He gazed at me intently. "Talon, haven't you been in a situation where keeping a secret is better for everybody, even if it kills you to stay silent?"

My jaw dropped and for a moment I wondered if Jacen knew about my son. I stared at him speechless for a minute before I pulled myself together. "Yes, I have." I sighed heavily as I ran my hand through my hair. "Fine, we don't need to talk about this now. Come on, I'll escort you to your room."

We started walking down the hall and met up with my brother Jaden.

"I was just going down to relieve you," he said.

"Jacen wants to go to his room."

Jacen looked to me and then my brother. "You know, I'm not too sleepy. Can we watch the HoloNet some more?"

My brother shrugged. "Sure." He lifted up his datapad. "I have a lot of reading to do anyway."

I handed my brother my blaster. "Okay, I'll see you in the morning."

Jacen and Jaden returned to the dayroom and I went down to my sleeping quarters and wrote in my journal. It's been a rough day. I think I'll turn in for the night.

**_Entry 134_ **

It couldn't have been more than an hour later that I was jolted out of a deep sleep by my father yelling, "We have an escape!"

I jumped out of bed, pulled my trousers, boots and weapon's belt on before running down the hall. My father was in the latrine leaning over the prone figure of my brother. He looked up to me when I entered. "He's breathing and has a pulse. Take care of Jaden. I'm going after Jacen."

I dropped to my knees in front of Jaden and tried to wake him up. I gently slapped his face and tried splashing water on him, but that didn't work. My anger at Jacen began to boil over. Jaden had a big bruise on his chin and there were marks on his throat where Jacen probably used one of his classic chokeholds to render my brother unconscious. Mom was right; Jaden is a healer and not a fighter. Damn! Jacen knew Jaden was the weakest link of our group when it came to fighting and took advantage of that weakness to escape.

Ben and Jaina came running into the 'fresher. Both of them were frantically trying to figure out what was going on. "Jacen nearly killed Jaden and Dad went after him," I said. "Is there a first aid kit around here with smelling salts? Maybe there is something in Jaden's medical bags."

"I saw a medkit in the kitchen," Ben replied as he ran back down the hall. Jaina gazed at my brother's beaten body and then turned toward me with a haunted look.

"Your Dad went after my brother?"

I nodded and despite my anger, I felt bad for Jaina. She had to believe my father is going to really kill Jacen this time. Her brother tried to kill Aunt Mara, my dad and now he injured my brother.

"Oh kriff!" she yelled as she ran down the hall just as Ben was entering with the first aid kit.

"Where's she going?"

I grabbed the medical bag. "She probably going to try to keep my dad from killing Jacen."

Ben looked shocked. "He wouldn't do that, would he?"

I emptied the contents of the medkit on the floor and spread things out to see what I had. "I honestly don't know what anybody is going to do at this point. This entire scenario is like something from a bad suspense novel." I found an ampoule and looked at the small writing on the side. "Ammonia Carbonate. I think this is it." I snapped the ampoule and placed it under Jaden's nose. After a few seconds his eyes fluttered open. He took a deep breath and immediately regretted it as he slapped the smelling salts out of my hand.

"Gods that is awful!"

I helped my brother sit up. Jaden brought his hand up to his bruised chin. "Damn that Jacen. That di'kut sucker punched me and then choked me out."

"He's good at that," I said as I helped my brother to his feet and pulled his arm over my shoulder. Ben took the other side and we both helped walk Jaden to his room. I opened his medical bag and got an ice pack on his chin.

I then turned to Ben. "I assume your father knows what's happening."

Ben nodded. "He wasn't in his room when I got up. I hope he's with your dad."

"I hope so too."


	31. Chapter 31

**_Entry 135_ **

After about a half hour Uncle Luke and my dad came out of the Myrkr forest with an unconscious Jacen hanging over my father's shoulder. Jaina and Ben ran up to them as I lagged behind while helping my woozy brother along. I don't think Jacen gave him a concussion, but Jaden isn't very steady on his feet yet.

"Is he okay?" Jaina asked Uncle Luke anxiously as she reached her brother.

"He's just stunned," Luke reassured her.

Uncle Luke told Jaden to sedate Jacen and do what he needs to do to keep him under until the Solos get to Myrkr.

I don't know why Jacen tried to escape. Perhaps he preferred to be eaten by wild vornskrs than facing his parents…or maybe something I said to him earlier spooked him.

I would not be surprised one bit if Lumiya is connected with the plague. For a nanosecond I considered that Jacen might be involved in the plot to kill Hapan royals, but I immediately dismissed the idea. Jacen would never put Tenel Ka in danger. I don't care if he was a yellow-eyed, card-carrying Sith so evil that he shot Force lighting out of his ass. He would never risk Tenel Ka's life. Never!

.

.

**_Entry 136_ **

Eventually the Millennium Falcon arrived on Myrkr. As we watched its approach my dad's face blossomed into a wide grin. My uncle asked dad why he was smiling, but he just said, "I don't want to ruin Han's surprise."

We strode over to the ship as it touched down and watched as the boarding ramp slowly lowered. The first person out was Leia, her face was a portrait of sadness and sheer apprehension. Jaina ran up to her mother and embraced her. I was watching Jaina and my Aunt Leia when I heard Ben scream out, "Mom!"

We all looked up the boarding ramp to see my Aunt Mara slowly moving down the ramp as Han hovered next to her protectively. A wide smile blossomed across my Uncle Luke's face as he raced toward Mara. Ben beat him to her and practically crushed his mother in a big hug.

"Easy Ben, your mother is not quite up to peak condition," Han pointed out. "Try not to squash her."

Neither Ben nor Mara seemed to hear the former smuggler's warning. They held each other tightly, crying on each other's shoulders. "Gods, Mom," Ben sobbed. "I was so afraid you wouldn't recover. You were dead…" Ben's voice cracked and faltered for a moment. "Dead."

Eventually Ben allowed his father time to greet his wife before they started walking toward the Myrkr base.

When my aunt saw my father as she broke away from Luke and marched over to him. She gazed into my dad's yellow stained eyes and shuddered. "Mark," she said grimly, "You turned to the dark side to save me."

He gave her an apologetic half smile. "Yes," he admitted.

She smacked him across the chest. "You're an idiot."

I had to laugh at that...my dad did too. Aunt Mara admonished Dad for taking such a big chance but I don't think she was really mad at him. I think she was more scared for him. Those sickly jaundice eyes doesn't help ease anybody's apprehension.

.

.

**_Entry 137_ **

The Solos and Uncle Luke tried to talk to Jacen again, but he wasn't giving them any more answers. Jaden stayed with a shackled Jacen while the rest of us went down to the dayroom to discuss our options.

"I think most of you know the situation." Uncle Luke said to us. "It appears Lumiya tricked Jacen into dark side training. She somehow convinced him that a great threat was coming and he would need to learn the skills of the dark side to supplement his Jedi training in order to defeat this impending danger. During the few times Jacen was awake he was either violent or insolent." Luke looked over to Leia and Han, hesitating slightly before he continued. "On top of attacking Mara on Kavan, he tried to kill Mark with a blaster and he beat and choked out Jaden during an escape attempt."

Leia sobbed as laid her head on Han's chest as they sat together on the couch.

"Last night he ran into the Myrkr forest with total disregard for his safety," Luke continued. "He was nearly eaten by vornskrs. It appears he has lost the will to live, or at least he has a total disregard for danger."

My Uncle Luke then broached the subject that was on all of our minds. _What were we going to do with Jacen?_ If Jacen didn't want to return to the Jedi and if we weren't convinced that he renounced the darkside we had little options. He already proved to be very dangerous. We just couldn't let him walk away as a free man. We could confine him to the Temple using either a Force cage or ysalamiri until we felt he wasn't a danger to others or we could put him in carbonite (as you can imagine that suggestion didn't go over well with Uncle Han).

Han shook his head in confusion. "Can't you wave your hand and with your Jedi magic make him better?"

Luke frowned as he paced in front of the group tensely. "I've never heard of an unrepentant Sith being deprogrammed through the use of the light side of the Force."

"Well then…," Han's voice rose a bit in frustration. "Can't you make him forget he's Sith…that he ever met Lumiya?" Han shifted in his seat so he was facing Luke fully. "You've done it before with those two stormtroopers on Dathomir, remember? You made them forget they saw you."

"Yes," Luke nodded slowly. "What you are suggesting is a memory rub. It is not something the Jedi usually do. It can be done with the light side of the Force, but it is usually practiced by Sith."

Han made a frustrated gesture with his hand. "Luke you've done it before. You know how to do it. If you make Jacen forget about Lumiya and her teachings, then he wouldn't be Sith," Han argued. "He wouldn't be a danger to anybody and he can go back to being the Jedi he was before."

Luke shook his head. "I can't do it Han. It worked on those weak-minded Stormtroopers, but it won't work on a trained Jedi. Jacen needs to be conscious for it to happen and he will block my efforts through the Force."

"Then do it here," Jaina spoke up.

Luke gave her an incredulous look. "If Jacen doesn't have the Force, then neither do I." Luke pointed out the obvious.

Jaina motioned towards my dad. "But he does."

"What?" My father sat back in his chair shocked. "Whoa, no, no, no. I don't want to be screwing around in his head."

"If we did that," Leia said in a quiet, hopeful voice. "Would that mean we can pretend none of this happened?"

Luke's jaw tightened as he stared at the ceiling in thought. "I don't know…it doesn't really matter because I never trained Mark to do that technique. We'd have to leave the planet for me to teach him."

"Mark," Aunt Mara turned toward my father, "You know how to do a memory rub, don't you?"

I could see the muscles in my dad's jaw tighten. "You know I do." He looked over to Mara. "You watched the Emperor wipe away the memories of more than one of his enemies."

Mara closed her eyes. "Yes, I have."

"I won't do it," my dad said defiantly. "If I make a mistake the results could be devastating."

"You're right." My uncle Luke responded. "And I wouldn't ask you to do something like that anyway."

"Wait, wait." Han stood and walked over to my dad placing a hand on his shoulder. "Before you all disregard this possibility, can I first talk to Mark privately?"

My dad looked at Uncle Luke for permission. When Luke nodded the two men stood and left the dayroom and went somewhere to talk.

Once my dad was out of the room I knew the memory rub was a foregone conclusion. My dad idolizes my Uncle Han. It was Han Solo that found my father on Wayland. My dad often told me that if it weren't for Han he would have died under the rubble of Mount Tantiss. My father owes everything to the man and I knew he would do _anything_ to help the Solos.

After about ten minutes they returned. The sick look on my father's face let me know he agreed to do the memory rub.

We discussed this at length and realized it wouldn't help doing the rub if anybody told Jacen what happened and jarred his memory. Therefore, we all made a pact that day that we would never tell another living soul about Jacen's apprenticeship with Lumiya and his attack on the family. This information would stay with those that already knew. That meant Jak, Owen, Hanna, Anakin & Tahiri wouldn't be told about Jacen's brush with the darkside.

Instead my father came up with a cover story to tell the public. We would tell people that Jacen, Ben, Mara and my father followed Lumiya to Kavan. There, Lumiya attacked Mara and escaped. Ben brought his mother to the hospital while Jacen and my father chased her off planet and forced her down on Myrkr. While there Jacen fought and killed the Sith. In the battle he sustained a head injury and it resulted in amnesia.

My Aunt Mara wasn't thrilled that Jacen was the hero of this cover story, but my dad insisted on that point. He said if he was going to rip memories out of Jacen's brain he was going to replace them with a nice story.

We decided my dad would do the memory rub tomorrow. We all needed a good night's sleep.

.

.

**_Entry 138_ **

The next day my family filed into the room Jacen was being held. I hung back in the doorway. I really didn't feel right about this. Everybody thinks Jacen started his slide to the darkside prior to him leaving for his search for Force knowledge. That is years of memories. I can't imagine somebody taking my memories. Would I forget about my son, my friends, my adventures?

I was in the room long enough for Jaden to bring Jacen out of sedation. Jacen woke up and looked at the sad and heartbroken faces of his family members surrounding his bed and came to a frightening conclusion. "Are you going to kill me?" he asked.

That was it. I left the room. I walked down the hall, sat on the floor and leaned against the wall. Why would Jacen think we would kill him? Even if we thought he was the most ruthless Sith Lord in the galaxy, Uncle Luke would try to redeem him. I know I must be missing a huge piece of the puzzle. None of this makes sense.

After a while I heard a commotion going on in the room. Soon afterwards I saw my father rush from the chamber and headed for the 'fresher. My uncle Luke followed him. I closed my eyes and feared the worst had happened. I waited for my father to return, but when he didn't I got up and walked back to Jacen's room. My cousin was lying in bed looking very confused and asking why he was shackled to the cot.

"Sorry about that Jacen," my brother said. "You were thrashing about a bit and pulling out your intravenous line."

Jaden uncuffed Jacen and then removed the IV. My cousin asked what had happened to him and we repeated the false story we agreed upon—he pursued Lumiya to Myrkr and killed her.

Jacen nodded slowly. I can tell he was trying to remember, but couldn't. "So what happened to me?"

"You received a blow to the head," Jaden explained. "When I talked to you earlier you appeared to be suffering from retrograde amnesia. I put you under sedation to allow you to heal."

After a moment Jacen suddenly shouted. "Wait! I can't feel the Force! Did I lose the ability to touch the Force?"

"No, no, we're on Myrkr!" Jaden reassured him. "It's the ysalamiri. Don't worry."

Jacen let out a relieved breath. "You all look older…this amnesia…how pronounced is it?"

"We don't know son," Han said softly. "What is the last mission or event you remember?"

Jacen frowned in concentration. "I remember," he hesitated in thought. "I guess the last big event I remember was Anakin and I going on a Jedi Mission to the Gargon system."

Jacen's mother gasped and all in the room glanced at each other with a look of shock.

"Okay…I guess from that reaction, a lot of time has passed." Jacen ventured. "How much?" He looked at me, but I averted my eyes. Jacen turned to his sister. "Jaina, how long?"

She closed her eyes and sighed. "Almost six years."

Jacen gazed ahead blankly. "That explains why everybody looks so different." He turned to Jaden. "I guess you completed medical school then?"

Jaden nodded. "Yes."

"Good, I thought a pre-med student was treating me." Jacen rubbed a hand over his eyes. "Jaden, will I regain my memory?"

Jaden shook his head. "We don't know."

He nodded sadly. "Six years? What happened in the last six years? That's a long time to lose." He gazed at his sister and gave her a faint smile. "You have to help me remember, Jaina."

His sister's eyes started to glisten with tears. "I will Jacen, we all will. We'll tell you what we can."

"Okay," Jacen nodded, but then looked up at his sister questioningly. "So, did you ever marry Kyp?"

"What?" Jaina looked alarmed. I noticed the Solos looked equally distressed, but I can tell Ben, Jaden and I are trying not to crack up at that comment.

"What does that mean?" Han asked his daughter through grinding teeth. "Kyp is almost fifteen years older than you!"

She held up her hands. "Dad, he had a crush on me. We never did anything." She glared at her brother. "Jacen where did you get the idea that Kyp and I were dating?"

Jacen shrugged as he tried to concentrate on the answer. "Well, the guy did have a holocube shrine to you in his room and all of his skin-holos featured women who looked like you."

"What?!" Jaina and Leia shouted simultaneously.

"Okaaaaay," Jaden drew out the word as he placed a hand on Jacen's shoulder pushing him back down to the mattress. "I think we should wait until the sedation medication is totally out of your system before we talk." Jaden looked up to Jaina and Leia and gave them a discomfited smile. "People coming out of a drug induced unconsciousness often say things they normally would keep to themselves." He looked at the other people in the room. "I know everybody wants to talk to him, but I think he needs to rest for a while." When nobody moved Jaden made a shooing motion with his hand. "Just give him an hour or so. Please."

Reluctantly we all left the room leaving Jaden sitting next to him. I wanted to hear more about this Jaina and Kyp scenario. As far as I knew the guy Jaina was dating is this Imperial pilot named Jagged Fel. I bet that makes Han crazy that his daughter is dating somebody from the Imperial Remnant.

As I walked down the hall I realized that Jacen may not remember his niece and nephew. Stang this sucks.


	32. Chapter 32

**_Entry 139_ **

As the sun set over the Myrkr forest, I found my dad sitting on a bench outside as he held his pet ysalamiri on his lap. As I walked up to him I didn't need the Force to tell he was depressed. I sat down and he gave me a faint smile acknowledging my presence. "You okay, dad?"

He nodded as he scratched his ysalamiri behind her ears. The animal turned and rubbed her face against his hand and then climbed up his chest so she could rub her reptilian face against his bearded chin. My dad always saw this as a sign of affection. I think it is more likely that his pet was simply putting her scent on him and marking her territory. Dad smiled at the ysalamiri and then looked out to the Myrkr forest. "I captured her in this forest decades ago. We realized the Emperor somehow survived his confrontation with Vader and was now on Byss. Karrde thought if a ysalamiri was good enough to capture a Jedi Master, it possibly could work with a Sith."

"It was a good idea," I said.

"This is the first time Nibbles has been back to her home. I wonder if she misses being in the wild?"

"I doubt she misses being hunted by vornskrs. She's probably lived twice the lifespan of a wild ysalamiri." I gave dad a knowing look. "You aren't out here pouting because you think Nibbles is homesick. You've been out of sorts since the memory rub. Do you think it was a mistake?"

"Yes," my dad said slowly. "But at the time it seemed like the most humane and effective way of bringing Jacen back."

"Then why are you upset?"

My dad closed his eyes for a moment before he opened them and looked at me sadly. "Although on the surface it looked like I did the procedure successfully, I kriff'd up royally. I took too many memories from Jacen. I didn't have the skill to be precise. I knew the procedure from Palpatine's recollections, but the Emperor was never one for finesse. He would just yank out memories without worrying about taking too much." He sighed and scratched the top of the ysalamiri's head as he gazed out at the forest. "We believed Jacen started his slide to the dark right before he left on his journey for Force knowledge. When I did the rub I started there. The memory rub only took a few seconds, but during that time his thoughts rushed over me like a jumble of holofilms playing at one time. After it was over it took me a moment to make sense out of what I saw. It was then that I realized my mistake."

"Which was?"

"Jacen's association with Lumiya and his slide to the dark only occurred in the last few months. I didn't see anything during his journey for Force knowledge that would make him dark. He learned some unique Force techniques from some less than reputable sources, but nothing I would consider Sith. I erased six years of memories for no good reason. Six years of memories… things that he would want to remember…things that he should remember." My father's head drooped. "I'll never forgive myself."

I put a hand on his shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze. "It's not your fault dad. This is what the family wanted. He was working with a Sith. Jacen did try to kill or injure three of his family members. We had no choice." I hesitated for a moment intriqued that dad was able to see some of Jacen's memories. I had to pose the question that was just begging to be asked. "Dad, while Jacen was working with Lumiya, did he do anything bad that we didn't know about? Did you see any connection between Lumiya, Jacen and the Hapan plague?"

My father lifted his head and gave me a hard look before sighing and rubbing a hand over his eyes. "One should never be privy to another person's most personal thoughts. I saw some of Jacen's most private moments, his highs and his lows. I am going to guard Jacen's privacy. You have your cousin back. He's the Jacen you grew up with, devoid of any Sith influence. That's what the family wanted and that's what they got." My father gave me a stern look. "We made a pact that once the memory rub was done we would never speak of Jacen's association with Lumiya. I expect you to honor that pledge. Leave the investigation of the plague to the Hapans."

I was taken aback by the intensity of my father's words. "Okay."

My dad stood. "Don't worry. If Jacen needs to know something, I'll try to find a way to get the information to him." He smiled. "He's family and family comes before anything else. I'll make things right." With that said he put his pet ysalamiri on his shoulder and walked back into the building leaving me sitting alone.

I trust my father will do just that…make things right. _Family first_ , _Family always_ … that's my father's motto. To him family was more important than the Galactic Alliance, our Jump Trooper brothers or even the Jedi Order.

This past week has shown how far my father would go to protect his loved ones.

.

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**_Entry 140_ **

We all returned to Coruscant. We put in our false reports, delivered Lumiya's body to the police and started telling lies about what happened. I still can't believe I'm involved in a conspiracy. Oh who am I kidding…I always thought I would be involved in a conspiracy, just not one with my Uncle Luke as a co-conspirator. I know this is really bothering the Grand Master, but it's what we all agreed upon.

Jacen is still in the Temple infirmary. Jaden told him it was to make sure there weren't complications from his brain injury. Of course I know it is because we're afraid that his memory will come back and he'll turn to the darkside again (if he ever was really dark. I'm not convinced despite all that he did). So far he appears normal and he's acting like the Jacen we always knew. Still, Jaden, Jaina, Ben and I have been tasked to keep a close watch on him.

I stopped by to _'visit'_ (I like that word better than _'guard')_ Jacen for an hour or so while Jaden went out to lunch. He was lying in bed reviewing news stories from the last six years. He has a lot of catching up to do. Jacen smiled when I entered his room. He put away his datapad and motioned for me to sit down.

"How are you feeling, Jacen?"

He rubbed a hand over his face where he was once bruised. "I feel physically fine." He paused then dropped his head and sighed. "Talon, I've been reading my mission reports and reviewing news stories from the HoloNet, but none of that tells me what was going on in my personal life." He sat up straighter in his bed and adjusted the mattress to a more upright position. "My brother and sister have been trying to help me, but nobody seems to know if I…" He hesitated for a moment. "Did I…was I seeing anybody? I'm thirty-one…I thought I'd be married by now to…to someone. Of course, if I were dating, wouldn't she have come to visit me by now? My family and friends have show up, but none of my female friends mentioned anything. I talked to your brother and he didn't know if I was dating anybody. I thought you might know."

I was uncomfortable with this conversation because I realized my father could probably answer this question, but I can't tell Jacen that. The best I could do is to pass along this information to my dad and hope he acts on it. "Sorry Jacen. I've never seen you around anybody other than Tenel Ka."

He glanced at me sharply. "Were we dating?"

My stomach dropped as I heard the hope in his voice. "Not that I know of, I just meant that when you were young you two hung out together."

Jacen's shoulders slumped. "Do you know who fathered her child?"

I shook my head. "No, she won't tell anybody. My father said that's probably a political maneuver to keep assassins from her daughter. If the matriarchs of the various royal families thought it was possible one of her sons fathered the child they would be less likely to put an assassination contract on the princess."

Jacen looked horrified. "How many guys did she sleep with?"

I had to laugh. "Probably just one, Jacen. She doesn't have to sleep with men for them to say they did. Guys lie about having sex with women all the time. Believe me, I work extensively in all-male combat units. The soldiers tell stories where they are scoring with women by the shipload. But I could tell they're lying. Ninety percent of their stories are testosterone-fueled bravado."

Jacen smirked. "Does that apply to you?"

I laughed. "Especially for me, although I'm not the one telling the stories. I have been with probably a dozen women over the last ten years…not the hundreds that the holozines like to pin on me."

Jacen snorted, "That's ten more than I've had."

My eyebrow rose. "Oh really. I didn't know you ever dated anybody."

"I dated two at least." He shrugged. "Of course, I can't remember the last six years. I could have bedded hundreds of women during that time." He said that with a serious face but then burst out in laughter. "Seriously, I dated a couple women after Tenel Ka left the Academy. I figured I had no chance with the Queen so I should set my sights on somebody that was more attainable…but they never worked out."

"Why not?"

He gave me a sad smile. "They weren't Tenel Ka."

"Oh," I said feeling heartbroken for my cousin. I know I probably should still be mad at him for the things he did, but I'm not. I just feel sorry for him. "I'll ask around and try to figure out if you were dating somebody on the sly."

"Thanks," he said with a sad smile. "Tell me what's been going on in your love life in the last six years."

I laughed. "That's a long story."

Jacen smiled. "That's okay, until Cilghal discharges me from the hospital, I have nothing but time on my hands."

.

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**_Entry 141_ **

Tenel Ka must have heard about Jacen's injury because she traveled to Coruscant to visit her old friend. I was really relieved when I heard that her and her daughter weren't on Hapes when the plague broke out. She'll probably stay on Coruscant until the outbreak is fully contained and investigated, which is good for Jacen. Maybe they can spend some time together. I know she has a child, but I also know Jacen would accept her daughter as his own if he could be with Tenel Ka. I wish he could get up the nerve to ask her out.

Then a horrible thought came to mind, maybe he did ask to date her and she turned him down. That would have been awful for him. It doesn't seem right that they aren't together.

.

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**_Entry 142_ **

Shortly after Tenel Ka's arrival, my mom told me that dad's friend Deke Tavik—Commander of Tenel Ka's personal security force—showed up to talk to my father. She wasn't sure what they discussed but dad looked troubled. He went into his room, packed some things and then told my mom he had some work to do. My mother knew better than question him when he has that look on his face. It's not unusual for my father to get called out on Jedi or Jump Trooper business at the last minute, but my mother said she thought this was something different… and I think she's right. Commander Tavik and my dad left Coruscant without filing a flight plan. The Grand Master had no clue as to where they went and supposedly Tenel Ka doesn't know either.

This is very suspicious.

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**_Entry 143_ **

After a week or so, my Dad returned home and immediately put in his resignation from the Jedi Order. When I asked him about this he said he was getting too old for Jedi adventures, which is a load of bantha dung. He's hiding something.

I thought I would be able to figure it out using my post-cognitive abilities. My dad had put in a salvage claim on Lumiya's silver spaceship and I am fairly sure that was the ship he used on his clandestine mission. All I would have to do is touch it and possibly get a glimpse of the truth. Unfortunately, when I looked for it in the Temple hanger I couldn't find it.

I later discovered my dad sold it and bought a brand new shuttle. He said Mom didn't want to travel around in a Sith ship. That might be true, but still…I don't know…something doesn't sound right.

I'm probably overreacting. It's possible he retired from the Jedi Order because he feels guilty over the memory rub and doesn't want to face Jacen everyday in the temple. My father said he and mom would eventually move out of the Jedi Academy and into an apartment close to the restaurant they own. They were just waiting for the right place to come on the market.

Still…something doesn't sit right with this situation.

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**_Entry 144_ **

Today was a shocker. First of all, I found out that Tahiri is pregnant _again._ Okay, that isn't that astonishing.

Second, Tenel Ka announced that she and Jacen were secretly married years ago and Allana _is_ Jacen's daughter. Now that _is_ amazing! I didn't see that one coming. I saw Jacen shortly after the announcement and he was downright beaming with joy. I'm happy for him and his family. I just wish he could remember all the good times he had with his wife and child.

Third, I am hearing rumors that Jaina's Imperial boyfriend had proposed to her and she said yes.

But the most unbelievable thing of all was Jaden's surprise for the family. He asked if we could all meet at my parents' apartment because he had an announcement to make. Jysella was with him, which I thought was odd. He told my parents that after he discovered the extreme stress Jacen was under while trying to conceal his marriage and child, he decided to reveal his secret relationship. He and Jysella have been dating for the last year and he proposed marriage to her yesterday and she said yes.

My mom said, "What!? Why did you hide this?"

Jaden looked at my dad and said, "I knew dad and Jysella's dad don't get along."

My dad frowned. "We get along fine. We just like to harass each other." He got up and slapped my brother on the shoulder. "I'm happy for you, son." He turned to Jysella and smiled at her brightly. "Welcome to the family."

Of course my mother was crying and hugging Jysella and then my brother.

Damn! My brother told me he had a beautiful girlfriend and he wasn't lying. I congratulated the two.

Jysella was all excited and said, "Come on Jaden, let's tell my parents."

I noticed a bit of unease cross Jaden's face, but he put on a brave façade and went to break the good news to her parents. After they left my mother turned to me. "It seems everybody has some big secret. Why don't you tell me about yours?"

I know my eyes went wide and my breath arrested in my chest. How would my mother know about my son? "What secret is that?" I asked trying to buy myself some time to think.

My mom rolled her eyes. "About Zylie. Why didn't you tell us you were dating Zylie?"

I let out a relieved breath and I noticed my dad's eyes narrow with suspicion. "I met up with Zylie a few months ago. We just started to date. There really wasn't anything to tell, Mom. We're not engaged or anything."

My mom smiled softly. "You be good to her, Talon."

"I will Mom, I promise." I looked at my wrist-chrono. "I have a meeting to go to. I'll see you later."

I was walking away from my parents' quarters when my dad caught up with me in the corridor and grabbed me by my tunic.

"I want to talk to you." He had a serious look on his face telling me he knew I was hiding something. He looked around and pulled me into an empty dayroom. "Talon, I felt in the Force shear panic coming from you when you mother asked you to reveal your secret. And when she mentioned Zylie you were relieved." He crossed his arms across his chest. "What secret are you keeping?"

I shook my head. "I can't tell you dad."

My father put his hand on my shoulder. "Talon, there shouldn't be any secrets from your family. If you can't trust us, who can you trust?"

I had to laugh. "No secrets! How can you say that with a straight face after what's happened in the last few weeks?"

My father didn't laugh; he just stood there expecting an answer from me. I squared my shoulders and looked my father in the eye. "You're right dad; we shouldn't have secrets from each other. So why don't you go first with your secret. Where did you go with your friend Deke Tavik—the Commander of Tenel Ka's personal security force? The Grand Master didn't even know where you went. And why did you put in your resignation from the Jedi Order immediately upon your return?"

My dad dropped his hand from my shoulder. "I can't tell you because it would jeopardize the lives of many people including your family."

I nodded. "That's the reason I can't tell you my secret. It would jeopardize the life of a family member and many other innocent people." I gazed at my father intently. "Dad, you always told me there are some truths that should always remain secret. I know you were referring to the memories you gained from the Emperor Reborn, but it is true nonetheless. Sometimes telling the truth doesn't help a damn thing."

He nodded slowly. "You're right." He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I hope your secret isn't as bad as mine." With that he walked out of the dayroom and returned to his quarters.

I stood there stunned. _What in the worlds was my dad hiding?_

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.

**_Entry 145_ **

Through security holocams, the Hapan government has finally identified Lumiya as the assassin who released a nanovirus within the royal palace that killed or sickened many Hapan royals.

I was queasy when I heard the news. I was hoping my suspicions were wrong, but they appear to be spot on. Of course, that particular HoloNet news bulletin greatly increased the pucker-factor when it came to dealing with our _'Darth_ _Jacen'_ cover-up (that is the term I use when thinking about the situation). I know Ben and Jaden have been acting nervous, but we don't dare talk about it.

I have to admit, there is an upside to this turn of events. Because we had announced that Jacen was the Jedi who killed Lumiya he instantly became a hero of the Hapan people. Jacen's new status allowed Tenel Ka to take him as her official consort without much protest and Jacen can now live openly with his family.

But there is a downside…and it's a really bad downside. If the Hapans ever got the tiniest hint that Jacen worked with Lumiya the mynock crap would hit the exhaust port fan so hard our family, the Jedi and Tenel Ka would be devastated.

No, devastated is too kind of a word. It would literally destroy our family and the Jedi Order. The Jedi would be seen as liars who conspired to protect another Jedi and family member. Tenel Ka could possibly be forced from her throne. The Galactic Alliance would be pissed that we jeopardized the long-standing relationship between the Hapan government and the Galactic Alliance. The Solo, Skywalker and Tantiss families would be publically disgraced and ostracized. I know that sounds extreme, but I don't think I am over-exaggerating one bit. This would be an intergalactic political incident involving the assassination of royals and a cover-up headed by the Grand Master himself.

The only thing that could conceivably make this situation worse would be if Jacen had anything to do with the planning and execution of the plague. Up to now I thought Lumiya did it on her own because I refused to believe Jacen would do anything that could possibly risk the life of Tenel Ka. But now I realize Tenel Ka and her daughter were conveniently off planet and out of danger when the plague hit. I was also told there were multiple assassination attempts on Tenel Ka and Allana prior to the plague outbreak. Therefore, Jacen had a _huge_ motive to eliminate the people who threatened his family.

As it stands now, a majority of the most hostile and backstabbing royals are dead. Jacen is officially the Queen's consort and he gets to live happily ever after with his wife and daughter. Things couldn't have worked out better if Jacen planned it himself…which, I hate to say, he probably did.

My original theory was Lumiya used the nanovirus to show Jacen she could hurt his friends if he didn't join her. Now I wonder if Jacen got Lumiya to plant the virus in exchange for his apprenticeship. I was always perplexed as to what Jacen could gain from his association with Lumiya…and having her kill his family's enemies would be a huge benefit to him.

Stang! I get the shivers just thinking about this. Now I **_really_** hope dad and Tavik's disappearance was to make sure Jacen's secrets remained safe (whatever those secrets are).

If dad had some insight from Jacen's memories he would know where to go and what to do to make sure nothing gets traced back to Jacen. How he and Tavik would accomplish that, I don't know, but for dad to decide it was best that he wasn't a Jedi upon his return he must have done something very unpleasant.

I know it is not very Jedi-like to say this, but I hope my father did the mother-of-all cover-ups and got rid of all the evidence.

After all, the truth won't bring back the dead and Jacen is no longer a threat to anybody. The facts coming out now can only make matters worse.

I have triple password-protected this journal and put in a safeguard that destroys the hard drive if anybody attempts to slice into it. I probably shouldn't be writing about this at all, but it helps me cope since I am to never discuss this situation again…even with people who know most of the details.

I've been on edge since we got back from Myrkr. This is a mega cluster-kriff.


	33. Chapter 33

**_Entry 146_ **

Cilghal medically discharged Jacen this week (meaning Uncle Luke thought my cousin no longer posed a danger to others) and he immediately began getting reacquainted with his wife and child.

Zylie had been preparing for her mid-term exams, so she didn't notice I was camping out in the Temple infirmary for the last week. When I finally caught up with her she asked me what happened. She had seen some HoloNet reports, but she wasn't sure if they were accurate. I gave her our agreed upon cover story. My dad had already contacted her father and told him what we decided to say about Jacen's brush with the dark side, but I guess her dad hadn't talked to her yet.

I'm still nervous. I really hope nobody finds out the truth. My father looks fairly calm, so that's a good sign.

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**_Entry 147_ **

Zylie is done with her mid-term exams. Now we have time to hang out again. She sometimes comes over to my apartment and we watch holofilms with Jaden and Jysella. I can't believe those two had me fooled for so long. Now that the secret is out Jysella is almost like another roommate. I have asked my brother to confine his _'tutoring'_ to his bedroom. I really don't like walking in on them necking on the couch.

I am happy for them though and since Jysella is studying to be a doctor there is little chance of her going off on dangerous missions like other Jedi. I am sure that is a relief to Jaden.

We go out on double dates often, usually to the clubs. Often we see Valin in the nightclubs cruising for women. Jysella will wave at him and then plop onto my brother's lap and give him an amorous kiss. Valin will shake his head, but he no longer gives my brother any grief. I was told Corran and Mirax Horn were very happy with Jysella's choice in a mate and they would probably kill Valin if he tried to give Jaden a hard time about feeling up his sister. Anyway, they are engaged. He needs to ease up on the protective big brother routine. Ha.

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**_Entry 148_ **

Tenel Ka is still on Coruscant. I saw her and Jacen walking around the temple each holding one of Allana's hands and sometimes picking the girl up off the ground. Their daughter would burst out in laugher every time her feet left the floor. It's good to see them together. Jacen waved me over and introduced me to his daughter.

She greeted me in a formal manner that reminded me so much of her mother, but her features were pure Solo. I could see a hint of the Solo smirk shining through. I don't know why I never saw the resemblance before. I have seen holovids of the Queen's daughter on occasion, but it never occurred to me that she could be Jacen's daughter. Of course, I was always under the impression he went on his journey for Force knowledge before Allana was conceived. Obviously Jacen hung around Hapes long enough to knock up Tenel Ka. I wonder why he was gone so long? I didn't want to ask, but I bet when he left he didn't know she was pregnant. That must have been a shock when he returned home.

Surprise…you have a kid!

I know how that feels. Hopefully in the last year or so he had time to be with his family…of course he wouldn't remember those good times, but at least his daughter would have the memories.

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.

**Entry 149**

Zylie talked me into going clothes shopping with her today. Arrrggghhh! The last thing I wanted to do is to go clothes shopping, but when I told her _'no'_ she blinked those big, sad hazel eyes at me in a way that always makes my insides go to goo. _Damn that woman._

We went to the _Mall of Coruscant_ , which is a huge local mall. In fact I think it is the biggest mall in the northern hemisphere. There is one bigger down south, but this mall has a better variety of stores (At least that is what Zylie told me).

We are three months into our _No Sex For Six Months_ pact and Zylie is testing the limits of my endurance…and today was _brutal_. I let it be known that the Temple has a swimming pool and there are open hours for the Jedi and their guests to swim on the weekend. Naturally she wants to go swimming and decided all of her swimsuits are out-of-style and she needs a new one.

So that is how I ended up in a women's clothing store, sitting outside the dressing room, while holding Zylie's purse. Force! I really hoped nobody I knew saw me or I would never live it down.

She grabbed a number of suits and started modeling them for me. The first one is a black-and-white, one-piece suit with a plunging neckline and high cut legs. It looks good on her and I told her so.

I am ready to buy the suit and leave, but she wants to see how the other suits look on her. She goes back into the dressing room and then comes out with a two-piece. I swear my heart skipped a beat. Stang! She's trying to tempt me. She was wearing a halter style top and the bottoms were not the traditional two-piece bottoms, but skimpy short-shorts. They actually cover more than a regular suit, but damn they look _soooo_ good on her.

I cleared my throat. "I really like that suit…but didn't you see that sign?" I pointed up to a posted notice saying: _Please wear underwear while trying on swimsuits._

She rolled her eyes. "I am wearing underwear." She turned and pulled down the backside of the suit revealing a little strip of cloth she called _'underwear'_. "It's a thong. I can't tell if a suit will look good on me if I am wearing granny-panties."

I quickly looked away and pinched the bridge of my nose in frustration. Zylie is going to be the death of me. "Gods Zylie, did you dress like that at home?"

She laughed. "Are you kidding? My father would kill me." She then winked at me and went back into the dressing room.

Right about now, I am hot and flustered. I had to put her purse over my lap because my body was misbehaving.

I just about jumped out of the chair when I heard a voice call my name. "Hey Talon!"

I look over and see Ben walking over to me. "I thought I sensed your presence in the Force." He looked at me holding Zylie's purse in my lap and laughed as he motioned his hand and made a whipping noise. "She's got you holding her purse!" He started cracking up.

Of course Zylie takes that moment to come out with the third swimsuit and it is an itsy bitsy string bikini. The bottom was so small that it was almost not there. She smiled when she saw Ben. "Hi Ben! What do you think?" She turned around revealing most of her behind with the exception of an area cover by a small swath of triangular cloth that barely covered up her thong.

I looked back to Ben when I heard an audible gasp. His eyes went wide and his face burned red and it looked like he was having trouble breathing. He quickly turned around. "It looks great Zylie." He chuckled uncomfortably. "Where's the rest of your suit?"

I stood and quickly guided Zylie back into the dressing room. "The second suit. I like the second suit!"

She just laughed and went back into the fitting room.

I turned back to Ben who was now leaning against the wall. His back was to me but I could see his shoulders shaking letting me know he was laughing.

"Stang Talon!" He was finally able to say. "Your brother told me about your no-sex-for-six-months promise. How's that going?"

"It's hard!" I said drawing out the last word, which made Ben break out in laughter again.

"You really got your hands full with that girl." He turned around and smirked. "I can't wait to tell Valin about this."

"Don't!" I pleaded with Ben. "I have a reputation to uphold."

He chuckled. "Okay, but you owe me one."

He took off leaving me standing there red-faced and clutching a purse. "Gods, I'm whipped."

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**_Entry 150_ **

We went swimming that weekend. My parents were there. Although my dad retired from the Jedi Order my parents haven't moved out of the temple yet. My dad loves swimming and he is almost always at the pool. He's wearing long shorts but I could tell he was still shaving his one leg to match his hairless prosthetic limb.

Zylie waved at my parents. They waved back and then my mom smacked dad lightly upside the head when he stared at Zylie a nanosecond too long. I heard my dad say to my mom, "I was just imagining that suit on you."

Ack! My mother is great looking woman for a lady in her late fifties, but I still shuddered at the thought of her wearing a sexy halter top and short-shorts. Nobody wants to imagine their mother wearing skimpy outfits.

I guess the word got around that Zylie and I were in the pool because about a half hour later Ben shows up wearing a tight, square-cut swimsuit that outlined every curve and bulge of his bits-and-pieces. Stang Ben! He has inherited his father's horrible fashion sense. That type of butt-hugging suit is popular with Corellians…not Coruscantis! Of course, those shorts got Zylie staring and saying that suit would look great on me. I swear Ben does this stuff just to get on my nerves. If it were anybody else I would suspect that he was trying to steal my girl away…but Ben wouldn't do that to me.

Arrggghhhh! I am positive Zylie is now going to bring me shopping so I could get a square cut suit of my own (note to self: Don't let her talk me into wearing a square cut swimsuit! RESIST TALON!).

As revenge I went over and pushed Ben into the pool. He then tried to _'pants'_ me while I was treading water, but I Force-shoved him away. My mom told us to act our age and stop the boisterous play. That was right before my dad started a splash fight with us. And I am not talking about using his hands to slap water towards us. He was using the Force to lift gallons of water up from behind and then dumping it on our heads. This continued until the lifeguard threatened to toss us all out of the pool.

Zylie thought it was funny. I swam over to where she was standing in shoulder-deep water. I kissed her and then grabbed her by the hips lifting her out of the water so I could get a better look at her swimsuit. "I love you in that outfit," I said while giving her my best flirtatious grin. I lowered her back to her feet and kissed her again.

"Thank you." She cocked her head to the side motioning me to look over to the lounge seats surrounding the pool. "You aren't the only one that appreciates my swimsuit."

I looked over in the direction indicated and saw a group of young male apprentices (probably between the age of fourteen and eighteen) sitting in deckchairs and staring at my girl. Stang! This is Coruscant…there isn't a shortage of women on the planet. They don't need to be gawking at my girlfriend.

I glared at the men and they all suddenly pretended that they were looking everywhere else but at Zylie.

"The show is over guys!" I yelled to them as Zylie and I got out of the pool to leave. The teens looked disappointed and started to get up to depart until they noticed Hanna Skywalker entering the pool area wearing a string bikini. It was an itty-bitty string bikini that was very similar to the one Zylie had tried on at the store. The young men smiled and immediately sank back into their lounge chairs.

Ha! I thought Ben was going to have a heart attack! Turnaround is fair play, though. If he gets to wear a revealing swimsuit why can't his twenty-something sister?

I really doubt my Uncle Luke knows she is wearing that skimpy suit. If Luke found out those boys were leering at his daughter they might find themselves at the Ossus sub-temple. They better watch out.

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**_Entry 151_ **

It was the end of the semester for Zylie. I was supposed to bring her to Corellia where her parents' ship was docked. Unfortunately the shuttle my father gave me broke down (it was his ugly Headhunter/Shuttle abomination that he gave me after he had put in a salvage claim on Lumiya's ship). So now I am looking to my friends to borrow a ship.

I asked Ben if I could use his shuttle to bring Zylie home. He said, "No, you can't borrow it, but if you get me an invite to come along, I'll bring you and Zylie there and back."

I remember my eyes narrowed suspiciously. Ben has been acting a little flirtatious with my girlfriend but I didn't think anything of it before, but now I am not so sure. "Ben, are you trying to hit up on Zylie?" I didn't think it was possible, but I had to ask.

He grinned at me. "No, but Zylie has a sister…who, according to her, is unattached, I thought I might give you a ride out to the _Wild Karrde_ and…I don't know, hang around for a bit and get reacquainted with the Karrde family…especially Valla."

I smirked. "That sounds like a great idea."

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**_Entry 152_ **

We brought Ben's shuttle into the orbital dock over Corellia where the _Wild Karrde_ was berthed. Zylie ran up the boarding ramp of the ship and gave her parents a big hug. Ben and I walked up and Karrde shook our hands. I noticed he didn't seem too upset about me dating his daughter anymore. Valla was there and Ben's face lit up. Valla is a beautiful woman like her sister. She is five years older than Zylie but she has the same build and features. You can tell they are sisters. Ben quickly started a conversation with the woman and wandered off down the ship's corridors.

Zylie gave me a knowing glance. "Is that why Ben wanted to come with us?"

"Yep."

She smiled. "Good."

I gave her a questioning look. "Why is that?"

"Because Valla has had the biggest crush on Ben since…forever."

"Is she Ben's secret admirer?"

"Yes."

A wild smile spread across my face. That would be awesome if Ben finally found someone special. I know he has been depressed since Niki left Coruscant.

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**_Entry 153_ **

Zylie's college break was ending so Ben brought us back to Coruscant. He looked depressed when we departed, so when Zylie left us alone in the cockpit I asked him about it. "Things didn't work out with you and Valla?"

He looked over at me surprised. "What? Why would you say that?"

I shrugged. "You look depressed."

He grinned. "I'm depressed because I had to leave Valla. Things went magnificently."

I smirked. "How magnificently?"

He gave me a wink. "Well enough that I didn't make a _no-sex-for-six-months_ rule."

"All right Ben," I chuckled. "You and her…you two…"

He shook his head. "No, I was with her on a ship with her parents and a vornskr. I'm not that stupid." He smiled at me. "But she is coming out to see me on Coruscant in a few weeks. Maybe I'll model my awesome swimsuit for her." His grin grew wider. "I noticed Zylie appreciated the cut of my shorts."

I groaned. "Please, don't flatter yourself."

"We can ask her if you like," he turned in his seat like he was going to call back to Zylie. I smacked him on the shoulder and scowled at him.

He just laughed.

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**_Entry 154_ **

Here we are at five-and-a-half months into my relationship with Zylie and I am called out to duty on some rimworld planet. This is the one time I didn't want to go out with the Jump Troopers. It's been over six months since my last mission off planet. I guess I couldn't expect to stay planetside and near Zylie forever.

**_Entry 155_ **

My next mission was on the planet Ukio. It was a planet located on the Manda Merchant Route. It was also the planet that provided a huge percentage of crops not only for the surrounding planets but also the core worlds such as Coruscant.

The planet's new ruling monarch decided to secede from the Galactic Alliance and at the same time triple the price of its exports. Of course the Galactic Alliance can't let one planet put a strangle hold on dozens of planets needing food. They tried to negotiate, but when that failed they sent in an army to let the ruler know they meant business. The jump troopers went in and secured the ports and supply lines. Meanwhile, the GA effectively brokered a change of leadership for the planet…and by broker I mean we bombed the kriff out of the capital city until the ruling party surrendered.

I really didn't like this situation. Planets should be able to secede in my opinion. Then they would have to provide their own planetary security. Eventually they will realize being part of the Alliance is the smartest move. I just don't like forcing planets to stay because they have something the Alliance needs.

I can't believe I would ever say this, but politics within the Galactic Alliance have gotten worse since Borsk Fey'lya's resignation from office. I never thought I would miss that miserable Bothan.

The new Chief of State is a human male named Mokk Streke—a man who has managed to skyrocketed up the political ranks in the last decade. He started out as a minor planetary governor of the planet Fakir in the outer colonies region. He eventually became the senatorial representative for his planet and through either luck or amazing political skill he worked his way up the ranks until he eventually stepped into the void created by Fey'lya's resignation. I have to admit, the new leader of the Galactic Alliance makes a good impression on the HoloNet. He is handsome, sharply dressed and has a commanding presence. Unfortunately, I have discovered he has no qualms when it comes to throwing Galactic Alliance Jump Troopers into what should be planetary skirmishes best resolved by local authorities.

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**_Entry 156_ **

Like I said in my earlier entry, I haven't been on a mission with the military for over six months and I am now discovering that much has changed during my absence. The new Chief of State, Mokk Streke, apparently enjoys modifying things and he is driving everybody in the military crazy. About four months ago the Chief of State changed the name of the Jump Troopers to Void Jumpers. Supposedly it sounded manlier and Streke thought it would help recruitment. Then he decided to change the headgear worn by the common Galactic Alliance Soldier. Previously the headdress worn in garrison was a gray patrol cap with a stiff, rounded visor, and flat top. Elite soldiers like Jump Troopers wore a special black wedge cap with straight sides and a creased down the crown of the hat. It was adorned with the Jump Trooper symbol and the soldier's rank.

Well, Mokk Streke decided that a great enlistment tool would be to give all soldiers the headgear previously worn only by elite Special Forces units. It's like he's saying, " _Everybody is special in today's Galactic Alliance Military"_. That really pissed off the guys who worked hard to earn their wedge cap. I heard that General Kirrak, Commander of the Jump Trooper Division (I guess it is a Void Jumper Division now) protested adamantly. Chief of State Streke told him that the Void Jumpers were welcome to wear a different color if they desired. That wasn't good enough for the General and the Jump Troopers ended up with a garrison cap that looked very much like the old Imperial officer cap with the sloping brim. I think that was some sort of message from the military to the Chief of State. If you are going to rule like an Emperor we might as well look like Imperial soldiers. Ha.


	34. Chapter 34

**_Entry 157_ **

After a one month deployment I returned to Coruscant and found Zylie waiting for me in my quarters (my brother had let her in). She jumped into my arms and gave me a big kiss. This is the first time since we started dating that I went off to a war zone and it was upsetting to her. She was crying and hugging me.

"I heard there was some fierce fighting," she said with a shaky voice. "Your brother told me we would know if you were hurt. That _no news is good news_."

I gave her an ardent kiss and then pulled away with a smile. "He's right. No need to worry." I reached up and brushed some hair out of her eyes. "Hey, I'm a Jedi. This is what I do for a living." I walked her over to the couch and sat down pulling her down next to me. "Zylie, dating a Jedi means I'll often be gone and in harm's way." I gazed into her eyes intently. "You have to decide if that is the life you want. I won't always be around and there will constantly be the worry about my welfare."

She gave me a pitiful smile and for a moment I thought she was going to decide it wasn't worth it, but her features brightened as she gave me a hug. "I guess it's not much different than a smuggler's life. My father was always getting into jams and shot at."

I smiled. "So you are going to stick around?"

"Of course," she said as she ran a hand down my chest. "Especially since we've been dating for six-and-a-half months already."

"Oh," I said nervously. "But I was gone a month, so we really should wait another two weeks."

"What?!" Zylie bit out. She sounded a little irate.

I chuckled. "Zylie, our first time together shouldn't be because of a date on a calendar. It should be special. I want the mood to be right."

She groaned. "Why do you think I was waiting for you in your apartment?" She brought her hand up under my tunic and caressed my abdominal muscles and then up to my chest. She had to notice my heart was pounding uncontrollably.

I caught her hand as it started wandering below my beltline. "Zylie, not here at the Temple with Force sensitives surrounding us. You'll drive me wild and I don't think I could successfully shield my emotions during my first time with you. I don't want everybody knowing our business."

She sighed and nodded. "Okay." She grabbed the holonet control and put on a movie. I snuggled up next to her and kissed her on the top of her head.

I was glad she understood. I wanted to wait until the perfect time and place.

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**_Entry 158_ **

Women always complain that men only have one thing on their mind—sex. You would think a man not badgering them for sex would be a welcome relief, but Zylie is not happy with waiting for the right moment.

To be honest, I am a little nervous about making love to her. I don't think I've been anybody's first lover before. I am so anxious I may not be able to perform at all. Of course, Zylie interprets my hesitancy completely different from what is actually going on in my mind (probably because she isn't a mind reader. I really should have manned up and told her how nervous I was).

I was over at her dorm room happily watching a shockball game with her when she made a sigh of irritation. She grabbed the remote and turned off the game and then glared at me.

"Talon, when you made up that no-sex-for-six-months rule you said it was because you wanted to make sure this relationship would work before getting serious. Here we are going on seven months and we haven't done anything more than kissing." I saw a tear roll down her cheek as she took a calming breath. "So does this mean you don't think this relationship is going to work?"

My jaw dropped. I never thought she would come to that conclusion. "No, Zylie, that's not it."

"Then what is it?" she demanded.

My heart was thudding in my chest as I tried to come up with the right words. "Zylie, I'm nervous about being your first. I'm also very scared that my bad luck in relationships will continue despite my best efforts to make things work." I paused for a moment as I nervously drummed my fingers on my knees. "I'm nervous because I've never been this much in love with somebody. I've been really hurt before and I know that once I make love to you, there will be no going back for me. If you left me I would become emotionally devastated. It would kill me."

"You love me?" she whispered.

"Of course." I gave her a wistful smile. "I've never told you that?"

She shook her head. "You've said you love things about me, like ' _I love that dress on you_ ' or ' _I love it when you smile like that'_. You never came out and said ' _I love you_.'

I reached over, clasped her hand in mine and looked deeply into her eyes. "I _love_ you Zylie. And I don't just love you in a certain dress or because of your dazzling smile. I love your sarcastic sense of humor. I love how you make my heart flutter with a simply touch. I love how I think of you and only you. I don't even notice other women any more…which is dangerous when I am driving a speeder in pedestrian zones."

Zylie laughed and leaned in until her head rested against my shoulder. "I love everything about you." I hooked a finger under her chin and tilted her head up so I could kiss her. It was a long, passionate kiss. When our lips separated I said, "I love you Zylie."

"I love you too, Talon."

"I don't want to rush you. I can wait as long as you want."

She rolled her eyes and whined. "I don't _want_ to wait anymore!"

I laughed and smiled at her lovingly. "So I guess what you're saying is the right time and place is right here and now."

She threw up her hands. "Yes! I'm tired of being sexually frustrated!"

I cracked up at that remark. "Okay," I said as I leaned in for a kiss. "If you insist."

.

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**_Entry 159_ **

Our first time together was beautiful. It was perfect. Well, almost perfect. After a night of love making Zylie rolled over to me and said with a smile. "That was wonderful. I've wanted to do that with you since I was fifteen."

ACK! That gave me a squicky mental image that made me feel like a pervert. I frowned. "Zylie, please don't make any reference to that particular childhood fantasy again. It makes me feel creepy."

She just laughed. "Okay." She cuddled up to me, rubbing a hand down my chest. "Is it okay to say that you exceeded any fantasy I've had about you?"

I groaned. "Only if you are referring to fantasies you conjured up after you reached the age of consent."

She laughed. "Why are you feeling weird about me having a crush on you since I was young? It's not like you were lusting after my young prepubescent body." She raised her eyebrows questioningly. "Unless you were…"

I interrupted her sentence. "No, Zylie. I didn't have any impure thoughts about you until you were nineteen and I saw you outside the temple."

She giggled. "So you admit you started having sexual fantasies about me immediately after seeing me that day?"

I rolled my eyes. "No, I wasn't having lustful thoughts about you _immediately_ upon seeing you…it took a couple seconds for my brain to process how incredibly hot you were and then, yes, I was thinking about doing what we just did all night."

"Then why did you torture me for six months?"

I laughed and then leaned in and kissed her. "Because you're a special woman and I wanted to do things right."

"And you didn't want my father killing you," she added.

I shrugged a shoulder. "That too."

She kissed me along my jawline. "Can we do it some more?"

I chuckled. "I would love to."

.

.

**_Entry 160_ **

My brother and Jysella got married. It was a big celebration. It was funny listening to my father and Corran Horn harassing each other. Master Horn remarked that it was lucky that Jaden got his mother's brains and good looks. Dad said, "Funny, I was going to say the same thing about Jysella and her mother."

My brother looked ecstatically happy. He and Jysella are a good match. Even Valin seemed to approve of the relationship. At least he didn't look too upset while he was carousing around the reception area looking for receptive females. I think he hit up on every unmarried female there…with the exception of Hanna Skywalker. When he ventured too close to her Ben intercepted him and probably threatened to do him bodily harm if he got near his baby sister (she's in her twenties already, so she really isn't a baby). I can't blame Valin. Hanna is a redheaded beauty like her mother. I bet she is giving my Uncle Luke gray hairs now that she is in college. Ha!

.

.

**_Entry 161_ **

Zylie and I went out to see a Holo and decided to go to my apartment to relax afterwards. My brother moved out two weeks ago and I have the place all to myself now. I don't think that will last long though. There are always new recruits coming into the Academy. Nobody with a double room apartment stays alone long.

We were almost to my apartment when Jedi Master Horn stopped me to ask me a question about training. I told Zylie to go on ahead and I'll meet her in my quarters shortly. She can get in; I already gave her my key code to the door. I guess that means this is getting to be a really serious relationship.

I answered the Master's questions and then went to join Zylie. When I walked into the apartment I sensed something was amiss. Zylie turned and glared at me with a look that would have sent her vornskr scurrying for cover.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"This is what's wrong!" She picked up a black lace bra off my couch.

I stood there in total shock. I had no clue as to why that was there. "I don't know where that came from, Zylie. Maybe Jysella was in here with Jaden today for some reason."

She held up the bra showing me the enormous cup size. "Jysella doesn't have breasts this big." Her bottom lip started to quiver. "How could you do this to me Talon? I thought we loved each other."

I swiftly walked up to her and tried to embrace her in my arms but she pushed me away. "Go away. Go to your other girlfriend."

I was now in full-blown panic mode. "Zylie, I don't have another girlfriend. I don't know why that brassiere is here. It doesn't belong to me."

Tears rolled down her cheeks as she threw the garment at me. She was about to walk out of the apartment and possibly out of my life when Ben Skywalker ran out of my brother's former bedroom wearing only a towel draped around his waist. "Stop Zylie. That's not Talon's; it's mine."

We both looked at my cousin in shock. First of all, what is he doing scantily clothed in my apartment and why does he own a bra?

Ben must have sensed my thoughts because he gave an exasperated shake of the head. "It's not mine, mine. It belongs to my umm…girlfriend." He looked back through the bedroom doorway nervously and I could sense he wasn't sure if he should say more. Eventually he turned to me and gave a sheepish smile. "I'm your new roommate, Talon. Surprise." He walked over to the floor and picked up the black bra and a shirt hiding behind the couch. "I finally moved out of my parents' apartment." He backed up to the bedroom while clutching the woman's clothing with one hand and holding his towel firmly in place with the other. "I'm sorry about this."

"Wait a minute!" Zylie called out sounding even angrier. "Who do you have in that bedroom? Because my sister told me you two were dating." She shook her head and stalked over to the bedroom door. Before she got there I heard a female voice say, "It's me, sis!" At that point an embarrassed looking Valla Karrde wrapped only in a bed sheet poked her head out of the doorway.

"Hey guys."

I could see the tension melt from Zylie's body upon seeing her sister. "Kriff!" she said with a laugh. "I was about to have Talon beat the snot out of Ben if I found somebody else inside that room."

Valla smirked. "Thanks for watching out for me." She gazed at Ben for a moment and then back to me and Zylie. "We didn't expect you back so soon. We thought you two might stay the night at the dorm."

I looked over to Ben who was blushing profusely. He took a step toward the bedroom. "Well, we don't want to bother you. We'll just leave you two alone."

Zylie snorted. "Understandable. You two have a mission to complete."

Ben blushed even brighter as he slunk back into the bedroom and shut the door.

Zylie looked over to me embarrassed. "I'm sorry, Talon."

I smiled and gave her a hug. "I don't blame you for jumping to that conclusion. If I went to your dorm room and found male underwear on your floor I would have questions also." I kissed her tenderly. "I think Ben and your sister are getting along great, don't you think?"

She chuckled. "I think so too."

.

.

**_Entry 162_ **

Ben is no longer going to tease me about being wrapped around Zylie's little finger. He told me he is in love with Valla. Hooya! Maybe he will end up not only my cousin, but also my brother-in-law.

Oh Stang! That last comment means I am actually considering marriage. I can't believe I'm thinking about this. I am fairly sure Zylie is the one…the person I want to spend my life with. We have been dating for a year now and she still has years more of college classes to attend before graduating. I guess I don't have to rush things.

I love that woman...I can't help but want to marry her.

.

.

**_Entry 163_ **

Grandpa Starkos died this week. My mother is crushed. Grandma Starkos is so upset that we don't think she will survive long without Grandpa. We went to the funeral. It was horrible seeing my Grandfather lying in a coffin for the viewing. He died peacefully, but seeing him looking pale and stiff was heartbreaking. My father held my mother in his arms as she sobbed while wracked with grief. What was really distressing was seeing my father cry.

Zylie came with me to the funeral. Later on she asked me about the Force and death. "I was told your Uncle Luke talked to the spirit of his Jedi Master after his death."

I nodded. "Yes, Jedi can sometimes maintain their form for a while after death."

"How about non-Force users? We know what happens to Jedi, because they have been able to come back from the flow of the Force to actually talk to you, but what about me? What will happen when I die? Or any non-Force user dies? Do we become one with the Force and are reunited with our loved ones who died before us?"

We were sitting on my couch in my apartment. I reached an arm around her and gave her a fierce hug. "The Force flows within all of us. Non-Force sensitives just don't have the ability to manipulate its power. I believe when we die we all eventually become one with the Force. Some Jedi can maintain their consciousness for a while, but my Uncle told me that eventually his mentor stopped appearing to him. He believes his essence became intertwined with the flow and his personality, what made him, him…disappeared."

She thought about it for a while. "Your mother's parents are both non-Force sensitives, so their fates are the same…but what about your parents? Do they ever wonder if their paths after death will diverge?"

I lowered my head solemnly and gave a sad smile. "My father talked to me about this once. He is not into any particular religion. I don't even think he embraces the Jedi philosophy in its entirety. He said he wants to believe that the Force bonds us together and after loved ones die their Force essences will find each other and intertwine together." I sighed deeply. "My dad has no proof of this, though. I think the thought of him ever being without my mother is so unthinkable to him that he embraces a philosophy that precludes that possibility."

She nodded and leaned her head against my shoulder. I hope my dad is right. I would like to think that when we pass on we will be with our loved ones for eternity.

.

.

My parents moved out of the Temple and to an apartment near the restaurant. They moved Grandma Starkos in with them to care for her. Despite my father's dislike of droids he leased a medical droid and another droid that specializes in elder care. They didn't want anything to happen to grandma and then find themselves waiting for an ambulance speeder and not knowing what to do.

Zylie and I visit often. I think my grandmother gets me mixed up with Jaden because she told me that she really likes my wife, Zylie. I know my eyes went wide in surprise at that comment, but I didn't try to correct my grandmother…and neither did Zylie. We just looked at each other and smiled.


	35. Chapter 35

**_Entry 165_ **

I have been accepted to the _Galactic Alliance School of Advanced Leadership and Tactics_ with follow-up orders to the school of _Advanced Military Studies_. The great thing about this is I will be stationed on Coruscant for at least two years with little threat of any deployments. This means Zylie and I are both students for at least the next two years. She is really happy that we will have a lot of uninterrupted time together.

I like the training when it comes to learning actual war tactics and strategy. I also enjoyed the courses on counterinsurgency operations and conflict management. Some of the other subjects can be a bit dry. For example we had to learn the different formations of various Planetary Defense Forces (PDF) throughout the Galactic Alliance. The GA has their armies divided into Corps, Divisions, Brigades, Regiments, Battalions, Companies and then Platoons. Some planets may use the same terms, but with different meanings. For example on Taris their Divisions are equivalent to a GA Regiment. So you may think the Taris PDF is sending around twenty thousand soldiers to support an operation and instead you get three thousand men. That can make a big difference in a conflict.

Overall, I am having a good time and I am making some good friends. There are so many different species and planetary variations of the GA Uniform that nobody has really questioned the subtle differences in my Jedi Asset uniform from other Coruscanti officers. In addition, our rank is taken away and replaced with a student emblem. This is to keep students from trying to pull rank on each other. Most are officers, but there are a few exceptions…like me. We are all considered equals here, and because of that nobody really knows I'm a Jedi (we don't wear weapons on campus, therefore I don't have the telltale lightsaber). I have decided to keep that knowledge to myself unless I am asked straight out if I'm a Jedi. I don't need to deal with any Jedi-Spook animosity while I am trying to study. I was allowed to keep my combat jump wings, so most men and women attending the school treat me with respect. I'd like to keep it that way.

.

.

**_Entry 166_ **

Zylie and I have been together for two years now. I want to ask her to marry me. I plan a long engagement to allow her to finish college, but I think she is expecting me to take this relationship to the next level soon and I don't want to disappoint her.

The problem I have is I really can't propose to her and not let her know about my son. It just doesn't seem right to expect a woman to commit to me in marriage without knowing all of the truth.

I need to talk to Ben about this.

.

.

**_Entry 167_ **

When Ben came back to the apartment we share I asked him about the situation.

"You son has almost four more years before he takes the throne, right?" Ben asked.

"Yes," I said.

"Do you have to tell Zylie who your son is?"

I didn't think of that. "I guess not…although she probably will want to know who the mother is." I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I'm worried that this might be a deal breaker."

Ben patted me on the shoulder. "I really doubt it. She's known about your checkered past from the beginning and she hasn't ran off screaming in terror."

I glowered at Ben as he chuckled. "Thanks, Ben."

"Hey, that's what future brother-in-laws are for."

My eyes went wide. "Did you propose to Valla?"

He grinned. "Yep."

I let out a happy shout as I gave him a brotherly hug. "Awesome!"

"So go talk to Zylie because I think Valla wants to plan a big double wedding."

I nodded and got on my comlink so I could arrange a date with Zylie.

.

.

**_Entry 168_ **

Today was the day of our big date. I wanted things to be perfect, so I rented a really nice hotel room in the upper levels of Coruscant and had a meal delivered and a bottle of sparkling wine.

I know Zylie is expecting me to propose and hopefully that is what I will do. I have the ring already. I just have to tell her about my son before I pop the question. Or should I pop the question and then tell her before she gives me an answer? Stang! I have no idea what I'm going to do. I realized right then and there that this was a terrible idea. What was I thinking? I should have told her and if she didn't get upset I should have set up this romantic evening sometime later. Dumping this all on her in one night is stupid.

**_Stupid, stupid, stupid!_ **

But what the hell am I going to do now? If I don't propose to her tonight she may think I was going to but I changed my mind. I look up to her and she is smiling knowingly…like she is expecting a proposal.

I started wondering if I should extricate myself from this situation. Maybe I could fake food poisoning and say I have to go to the hospital? Damn! That is what a coward does. She is going to have to learn about this eventually. I guess I am stuck with this idiotic plan I came up with.

We ate dinner in relative silence and were having dessert when I broached the subject. "Zylie, I love you very much. I love you more than anybody or anything in this universe and I want to bring our relationship to the next level." My stomach clenched when I saw the excitement in her eyes. Stang, this is going to end up badly, I just know it. "But ummm…" I hesitated for a second. "But there is something you should know about me first."

Her happy look melted right off her face. "What should I know?"

I pulled at the collar of my tunic that seemed to become uncomfortably tight. I was going to try to dance around the subject to soften the blow, but decided the direct approach was better. "Zylie, I have a son. He was conceived years before we started dating. It's a complex situation. My family doesn't even know about him."

She stared at me for a long moment. "You have a son?"

I nodded.

"Only one?"

I frowned at that comment. "Yes, only one." I shook my head. "Why would you ask that question?"

She shrugged. "There are rumors that you have dozens. I figured some of the stories might be true."

"Zylie, I only have one child."

"Why doesn't your family know about him?"

My head dropped sadly. "I wish I could tell them, but the child thinks another man is his father and if his paternity is revealed it could endanger my son and his mother. It is a complicated situation. "

"Were you dating a married woman?"

I shook my head. "No, she was single and unattached. I don't date married woman…it is just a very complex and strange situation."

"Are you going to tell me who he is?"

I shook my head. "I promised his mother I wouldn't reveal his identity."

"And do I know his mother?"

"No," I said quickly. "At least I don't think so. I do know you never met her. And I only saw her once since he was conceived. He was two years old when I found out about him. Actually Ben discovered his existence by accident and told me. My son's mother never intended for me to know about him." I let out a nervous breath. "Zylie, the only contact I have with the mother is she sends me holos of my son. We haven't been in the same room together in six years and that was only for me to see my son for the first, and so far, only time."

"So he's eight years old?" She grabbed her wine glass and took a long sip. I can tell this was not how she expected the night to turn out. "You should have told me earlier."

My stomach dropped. "I know."

"I thought you were going to propose to me tonight. Why else go all out with the meal and sparkling wine."

"I was going to propose." I reached into my pocket and pull out a ring box.

She waved the box away. "Ask me later. This is not the right time. This is just a lot to take in."

I gave a tight nod and put the box back into my pocket. I don't think I have felt this bad since I found out I had a son that I couldn't have a relationship with. My legs felt weak as I stood and went to the 'fresher to splash water on my face so Zylie wouldn't notice how upset I was.

When I exited the 'fresher I saw she was standing and gazing at me sadly. "Talon, I just need time to absorb this information. Don't be upset."

I came up to her and dropped to my knees and wrapped my arms around her waist as I leaned my head against her belly. "I'm so sorry. I love you Zylie. I don't want to lose you."

"Hey, I'm not going anywhere," she said softly as she dropped to her knees in front of me. "I love you too." She took my hands in hers. "You're not going to lose me. I was just blindsided with this subject."

"I'm sorry. It kills me that I have a son I can't raise, that I can't reveal to my parents." I looked deep into her eyes. "I can understand if this is a deal breaker. I'll understand if you don't want to deal with this situation."

She smacked me on the shoulder. "Stop being so melodramatic. If you conceived a child since we started dating it would be a different story." She gave me a guarded look. "You haven't conceived any kids since we started dating, have you?" She said it in a joking tone, but I knew she wanted an answer.

"Only if you're pregnant." I said with a smile. "I've never so much as looked at another woman since we started dating. You may not have been my first, but I definitely want you to be my last."

She hugged me. "And I want you to be my first and only." She pulled back to gaze at me. "Just ask me."

I gave her a wane smile as I reached into my pocket and pulled out the box. I opened it to reveal a diamond ring. It wasn't the biggest ring in the world, but I had been saving for a year to get a nice one. I must have impressed her because she gasped. "Zylie, will you marry me?"

A smile blossomed across her face. "Yes."

I let out a relieved shuddered breath. My hands were trembling as I slipped the ring on her finger and then kissed her.

This has to be the happiest day of my life.

.

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**_Entry 169_ **

Zylie and I went and told my parents about our engagement. Mom was overjoyed and gave Zylie a big hug and said she was thrilled that she would be part of the family and that she couldn't think of a better wife for me. Dad mirrored my mother's sentiments. We used my parents' communications transceiver to break the news to Zylie's parents. To my surprise they were equally enthused. They didn't mention Ben and Valla's engagement, so we assume they haven't told them yet, so we kept quiet about that.

.

.

**_Entry 170_ **

Ben just came back from a two-week Jedi mission. He was bummed to discover that Valla was on a cargo run with the _Wild Karrde_ crew and wouldn't be back until the end of the month. He was further distress to discover he was supposed to go on another Jedi assignment at the same time Valla would return to Coruscant.

This really brings the reality of the situation smashing down on both of us. If Zylie and Valla continue to be traders cruising around the galaxy with the _Wild Karrde_ crew and Ben and I remain Jedi always called off on missions…what type of family life were we going to have?

We don't want to try to get our girlfriends to quit their family business, but at the same time it is going to make it really difficult to have quality time together. Ben is so bummed out that he actually talked about taking a break from the Jedi and joining the _Wild Karrde_ crew.

"That's crazy, Ben. Your father is the Grand Master," I told him one night while we were watching a smashball game on the HoloNet.

"Your father was a Master and he quit."

"My father retired. He served the Jedi for three decades."

"If I joined the _Wild Karrde_ crew then I could be with Valla full time."

I gave a slight roll of my eyes. "I'm sure that'll go over well with your parents."

Ben shrugged. "They'll understand."

I paused for a moment thinking about this. There had to be another way. "We'll figure this out," I finally said. "Maybe Karrde can set up an operation on Coruscant and his daughters could run it."

Ben sighed. "Maybe." He looked over to me. "I'm going to be with her no matter what."

I looked back to the HoloNet. "Let me know what you decide…and I'll do the same."

Ben gave me a look of disbelief. "You would give up the Order for Zylie?"

"What's that shocked look for?" I asked somewhat irritated. "Do you think you're the only one who would throw it all away for love? If it came down to the Jedi and Zylie, I'd pick Zylie in a kriff'n heartbeat. I'm a pilot, a Force-user and I have post-cognitive abilities. I think I could be hired on Karrde's crew." I smiled. "But I don't think it will come to that. I'm sure we'll find a way to stay with the ladies. Even if it is taking on missions to the areas they'll be working at the time."

"Yeah, that might help," Ben said not sounding reassured.

"Stop bumming me out," I said as I smacked his shoulder.

"That's easy for you to say. Both you and Zylie are students on the same planet." He looked at his wristchrono. "Where is she anyway?"

"Study group. I'm going to see her when she is done. We have all our romantic rendezvous at her private dorm room. I'm not too confident about my shielding ability while at the Temple." I gave him a smirk. "So you don't have to worry about finding her bra on the couch and freaking Valla out."

Ben blushed and then laughed. "Thank you for that."

We fell silent while watching the rest of the smashball game. I'm sure we'll figure something out…if not I'm positive I would make a very dashing smuggler. Zylie tells me her father is one hundred percent legit now, but I think you can never fully take the smuggler out of the man. I wouldn't be surprised to find out that my Uncle Han still does smuggling runs, most likely for Corellian whiskey and the smuggling is just getting it into his home without my Aunt Leia seeing it. Ha.

.

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**_Entry 171_ **

Grandma Starkos took a turn for the worse. The entire family came to my parents' apartment to be with her during her last hours. The doctors told my mother that they recommended that my grandmother be taken off her life sustaining medication and changed to palliative care to ease _the transition_ …which I assumed meant death. My family agreed and my grandmother was put on meds to make her last hours painless and peaceful.

My Uncles Shon and Jaycen were there with their families along with my parents, Jaden and Jysella and me and Zylie. We were sitting around what would later turn out to be my Grandma's deathbed. I hate to say this, but I wish I wasn't there. There is nothing worse than seeing a loved one struggle to breathe. It's not like she would know if I wasn't there. Grandma had fallen into a comatose state and was not responding to anybody anymore. Of course, I had to be there for my mother. This was tearing her apart. She is heartbroken. I don't blame her. I couldn't imagine losing my parents. My dad never had parents so Grandma and Grandpa Starkos were like his mom and dad. He is not having an easy time with this either.

Grandma's breathing suddenly became less erratic and it calmed down for a moment. I was sure the end was near. Zylie was sitting next to me and buried her head against my shoulder. I could feel her tears soaking my tunic. Zylie barely knows my grandmother, but she is taking this hard. I think it is because she knows how difficult this is for me.

Everybody in the room startled when grandma's eyes popped open. She was looking at the doorway and we all turned expecting to see somebody standing there, but there was no one. Grandma smiled brightly and said, "Darik."

Her eyes then closed and she passed away. I looked at my father and brother. Darik was my grandfather's first name. Could he have come for her? As Jedi, wouldn't we have sensed his presence? My mother must have believed it true because she broke out in sobs, but I sensed she was happy that her parents were finally back together.

I will miss my grandmother terribly, but the thought that she is with the man she was married to for over sixty years gives me some comfort.


	36. Chapter 36

**_Entry 172_ **

We just found out Jysella is pregnant. My parents are all happy saying their first grandchild is on the way. I am happy for Jaden and Jysella, but it does get me a little depressed about my situation. My parents have an eight-year-old grandson they have never met. I still receive holo updates from Ema. Marcus is growing up so fast and he is so tall for his age. He is going to be a big guy. He is obviously a Tantiss male. I am happy, but at the same time a little depressed.

.

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**_Entry 173_ **

My son will turn nine in a few weeks. Usually I shop for a gift over the HoloNet and have it shipped to Ema so she can give it to him, but I couldn't find anything that looked good. I went to the mall, but nothing seemed right. When I went back to my apartment I noticed the X-Wing model I had on my dresser. When I was a boy about Marcus' age my father had bought it for me. He said it was an exact replica of the spacecraft my Uncle had flown when he destroyed the first Death Star. I remember spending hours at a time playing with the toy and dreaming of the day that I would one day fly an X-Wing (in my imagination I was a much better pilot than I actually am now).

I picked up the model and smiled. I thought this would be a perfect gift. It was in mint condition and it was a toy handed down from grandfather to father to son.

I packed it up with a small greeting card and shipped it off to Ema asking her to give it to Marcus. I told her just to tell him it was from a friend of hers.

.

.

**_Entry 174_ **

I got a transgalactic call from Ema today. When her holographic image flickered on I could tell something was wrong. "Talon, we need you to come to Indupar."

I immediately knew this had to do with my son. "What happened to Marcus? Is he alright?"

She took a deep calming breath. "He has demanded to see you."

I was a bit confused. "Did you tell him about me? How does he know who I am?"

She threw her hands up in a gesture of confusion. "I don't know. After his party he was playing with his gifts. He picked up the X-Wing you gave him and then things got strange. He asked me who gave him this gift. I told him it was from a friend of mine. He then stared at my sister Kaie and me for a long pause before he announced we all lied to him. He ran to his room and wouldn't come out. He said he wants to see the man who sent him the X-Wing." I could see she was trembling either in frustration, fear or anger. "What did you do to that X-Wing?" she said in an accusing voice. "Was there some sort of Force message attached to it? What did you do?"

I wasn't sure what happened. "I don't know Ema. It was a toy given to me by my father when I was a boy. There is nothing about it that would indicate anything to Marcus unless…" I closed my eyes and groaned. "Oh sithspit!"

"What?" Ema demanded.

I let out a frustrated breath. "Ema, one of my Force skills is post-cognitive vision. I can touch an object and tell who held it and see images of that person. When I had decided to send it to Marcus I thought it would be nice to give my son something my father had given to me. If Marcus inherited this Force skill…then he might have picked up something about me from the X-Wing…especially since I had it since I was a child and it has been with me up until the day I sent it to you."

Ema rubbed her temples. "Great. I don't know what to do. I have a Force strong nine-year-old who is having a temper tantrum. I don't know how to deal with this."

"How about the Seers? Don't they know how to fix this? How did this happen in the first place? Wouldn't they have seen this happening?"

She shook her head. "They are just as confused. I've never seen the Seers so bewildered. They are upset. I guess they don't like surprises. And now they can't see the future when it comes to Marcus. They think Marcus is blocking them. They don't know how he is doing it, but he has become an enigma. The Seers think his anger is clouding the timeline. They are the ones who suggested that you come and fix this situation." She ran her hands though her hair in frustration. "Can he go darkside? Is he in danger? He's so angry, Talon. Can you please come and see him?"

I have been waiting for this moment since I found out I had a son, but I am not going to be at the Seers' beck and call on their terms. "I'll come, but on one condition."

She frowned. "What?"

"I bring my family. My parents should know they have a grandson and when it comes to dealing with Force-strong boys throwing a temper tantrum…well there is nobody better to handle that then my parents."

"I'll have to ask the seers."

"Fine, but you said they're blocked."

She blew out a frustrated breath. "That's true. Go ahead, bring your family."

"Can I bring my fiancé?" I asked softly.

Her eyes dropped. "I heard you got engaged. I'm happy for you. I guess she wouldn't be pleased if you ran off to see your son's mother without her. Feel free to bring the entire family. I don't think things can get more screwed up than they already are. But they have to understand this must remain a secret. Can your family keep a secret?"

I couldn't help but laugh. "My father is the master of keeping secrets and I think it runs in the family. I'll get them together and we'll be on our way."

.

.

**_Entry 175_ **

Now comes the hard part…telling my parents. For some reason I wanted Ben with me. Maybe when my parents are yelling and cursing at me he could talk reason to them.

I called my mother up and asked if Ben and I could come over for dinner with her and dad.

Mom said she would love to see Ben and me and told us to come on over for dinner. When we arrived at my parents' apartment my father gave Ben and me a big hug. I sometimes think my father sees Ben as another son. He probably spent more time with Ben during his childhood then he did with Jaden and me. That's what happens in the Master/Apprentice relationship.

We weren't in the apartment for more than five minutes before my father became suspicious. I think I was oozing apprehension.

My dad got us some drinks while my mother was finishing dinner. He gazed at me intently before saying, "What's going on? Are you in trouble again Talon?"

I walked over to the couch and sat down heavily. "I need to tell you and mom something important."

Dad sat down next to me while Ben sat in a seat across from us.

"Did you get Zylie pregnant?" my dad asked.

"What?" I said shocked. "No, and we're engaged so that wouldn't be anything horrible anyway." I took a sip of the fizzy drink my dad gave me and wished I had something more powerful…like a straight whiskey. "Dad, remember when I told you I had a secret that I had to keep for the safety of a family member?"

He looked puzzled for a moment, but then he remembered. "When Jacen had his troubles?"

"Yeah, that's it." I took another sip of the drink. My mouth had suddenly become very dry. "Well, something has happened and I need to reveal the secret."

A look of worry crossed my dad's face. "Which is?"

I looked over to the kitchen. "I'd like to tell you and mom at the same time."

"Sure," my dad said as he looked over his shoulder to the kitchen. "Kira, honey, can you come here please?"

My mother came over while wiping her hands on a kitchen towel. "What is it?"

"Your son has something he wants to tell us."

My mother's face fell and I could see she was preparing herself for the worst. "Zylie didn't call off the engagement did she?"

"No!" I shook my head. Damn, I sometimes think they like Zylie better than me. "Please sit down Mom."

She looked over to my dad, her eyes full of worry. She sat down and I decided I should just tell them and get it over with. "Mom, Dad…I have a son. It turns out Ema was pregnant with my child after she left Coruscant."

Mom's hands went to her mouth to cover a gasp. My dad simply looked confused. "Why didn't you tell us?"

I looked over to Ben mainly for moral support, but Ben must have thought I wanted him to tell them. "The Queen was pregnant, but she miscarried. Ema discovered she was pregnant and took the Queen's place and Talon's son was passed off as the Prince of Indupar. We were told it must remain a secret. If anybody knew of his real parentage the Prince's life would be in danger and the kingdom would have went to a malevolent relative of the King. The Seers working in the palace had predicted a war would occur if Talon's son didn't become king."

My mom and dad looked at each other and back to me. I know they were trying to figure out if this was a hoax or not.

"I have a grandson?" my dad finally said.

"Yes."

"Why are you telling us now?" My mother wanted to know. "Won't he still be in danger?"

I shrugged. "It seems my son has my post-cognitive abilities. For his birthday I sent him the X-Wing dad had bought for me when I was a kid. I think Marcus was able to pick up things from the toy and was able to figure out I was his father and Ema was his mother."

"Marcus?" my father said sounding choked up. "My grandson is named Marcus?"

"Yes, he is named after me…and you." I took a couple of cleansing breaths. "I was asked to come to Indupar because he's angry at the deception. I said I would go and help, but only if I could finally tell my family. If you would like to come see him you are invited to Indupar."

My mother started crying. "If I would like to see him? Of course I want to see my grandson."

.

.

**_Entry 176_ **

Telling my parents was a little stressful, but now I need to tell Zylie. I called her over to my apartment and asked her if she could get a few days off from school. She smiled probably thinking I am taking her on a romantic getaway. I then told I want her to come with me to see my son.

Okay, that didn't go too horribly. But when I told her who my son is, she was shocked. She knows about Jacen and his daughter so this is a bit ironic. "What is it with your family and knocking up royalty?" she asked me. "Are you trying to keep up with the Solos? Han and a Princess, Jacen and a Queen and I heard Jaina's fiancé might end up Emperor of the Imperial Remnant."

Technically I didn't impregnate a Royal, just her twin sister, but I didn't think Zylie would appreciate me pointing out that distinction.

She wasn't thrilled about going to Indupar to see my son's mother, but she wanted to see my son. So she agreed to go with me.

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.

**_Entry 177_ **

Today was nerve-wracking.

We arrived to Indupar and I was asked to try to get my son to open his door. It appears Marcus was using the Force to keep the large and ornate wooden door closed. I knocked at the door and announced my name. After a second or two the pressure holding the door shut was released and the door cracked open a centimeter or two.

I took a deep breath and opened the door and peeked in. I could see my son sitting on the floor in a corner holding the X-Wing I sent him in his arms.

"Can I come in?"

He nodded and I ventured in his room. Once I was inside the door slammed shut behind me. I was shocked at the command the boy had with the Force. I could feel his power and his anger. As I approached him I feared I would see yellow orbs glaring at me, but I was relieved when all I saw was sad blue eyes looking back at me.

I pulled up a chair from a desk and sat down. "Hello Marcus. I met you before when you were two…I don't know if you remember me."

He shook his head. "Are you my father?" His voice was low and strained.

I nodded. "Yes."

"And my mother is really my Aunt Ema?"

"Yes." I didn't know what else to say.

He held up the X-Wing. "I could see things when I touched this. I see a young boy and a large man with red hair. I see you talking to my mother on the transceiver. I see you watching holo's of me and crying."

My stomach clenched. I thought Marcus would only glean information from my youth, but he was seeing things that happened in my apartment bedchamber where the toy was displayed. He saw me discuss things with Ema and my reaction to holos she sent me.

"They lied to you, just like they lied to me," he said matter-of-factly.

"Yes. I wasn't told about you at first, but it was for a reason. The Seers said my presence could endanger you, that being around you could cause conflict within your kingdom and endanger your family."

He sat quietly, head down, staring at the toy in his hands.

"Are you going to be alright, Marcus?" I asked.

He shook his head and started crying. I got off my chair and knelt down in front of him. "Hey, Marcus, everything is going to be okay." I reached out and took the X-Wing from his hands and put it aside. I then pulled him into a hug. "I know things are confusing about who's who in your family right now, but there is one thing you have to remember. Every person in your family loves you deeply. It doesn't matter if Kaie is not your mother. She's your aunt and she loves you like a son. I love you, your mom loves you. Your step-dad loves you. You are one lucky boy to have so many people who care for you. There are friends of mine that grew up as orphans with nobody to love them as children."

Marcus started crying again and I squeezed him closer, resting the side of my head against his. "And today your family is getting bigger. My parents and brother are here. You have grandparents who can't wait to meet you."

Marcus' crying grew ragged and then eventually became exhausted sobs. He pulled away from me to look in my eyes. "Are you going to stay with me?"

I took a deep breath and blew it out. "It depends on if my presence will endanger you. If I can stay I will…at least as long as I can."

He gave me a slight smile. "Then you can marry my mom."

_Oh kriff!_

I shook my head. "Marcus, that's not going to happen; after your mother broke up with me I started dating somebody else and I'm getting married soon."

I could tell that was less than welcome news. I decided to change the subject. "Would you like to meet your grandparents?"

He wiped his arm across his eyes, pulling away the tears. "Yes."

"Good," I said with a smile as I stood. "I know they can't wait to meet you."

I went to the door and realized it was still locked. I turned to Marcus. "Son, it's time to let people in."

He nodded and the door popped open. I poked my head out and called over my parents.

"Marcus wants to see his grandparents."


	37. Chapter 37

**_Entry 178_ **

My parents entered the room and we walked over to where my son was sitting against the wall.

"Marcus, I want to introduce you to my mom and dad, your grandparents, Mark and Kira Tantiss."

Marcus stood and walked over to my parents and offered them his hand in a formal greeting. My father would have none of that. He gave Marcus a big hug lifting the startled boy completely off his feet. My father must have felt Marcus' surprise because he gave an embarrassed grin and quickly set his grandson's feet to the ground.

"Sorry," my father said sounding choked up. "I'm just so happy to finally see my grandson. I can't believe how much you look like Talon." He turned to my mother. "Doesn't he?"

"Yes." Mom was crying and she held her arms out and Marcus allowed her to hug him. "We are so happy to see you." My mom let go of her grandson and sat down on a small couch and cried. "I'm sorry. It's just…we missed so many years. Years we can't get back and now…now I'm sure we're just strangers to you."

"For now," Marcus said softly with a sad smile. "But my mom…I mean my Aunt Kaie used to tell me that all friends begin as strangers." He walked over and sat down next to my mother. "As long as I could remember, I wished I had a father. Every night I would pray that some miracle would occur and my father was alive. I would dream that he faked his death to escape assassins and he would one day return to me."

"Oh, Sweetie," my mom sobbed as tears ran down her cheeks. She reached out and put an arm around Marcus and hugged him.

"And then my dream came true. I have my father." He looked over to me and I could feel an intense emotional turmoil emanating from my son. "I want to be happy, but I'm so conflicted—my mom isn't my mom, my dad isn't my dad. I now have my father back, but he is not the man I expected." He looked up to me with a discomfited expression. "No offense."

Kriff, I didn't know what to say to the boy, luckily my dad did. He walked over and sat on the couch on the other side of Marcus. The cushion springs screeched in protest from my father's weight and Marcus couldn't help but laugh when he listed to the side by the sudden shifting slope of the cushions. "Don't laugh," my dad said. "You'll be as big as me in no time." He pointed over to where I stood. "Look at your father and how big he is…and he's the runt of the litter."

"No I'm not. I'm bigger than Jaden," I protested sounding very much like a petulant child.

My son laughed and I had to smile. My dad is good with kids. I loved being around my father as a child, so much so that I used to be terribly jealous of Ben because he spent so much time with my dad as his apprentice.

"I can also sense that you are strong in the Force like your father," my dad continued. "If it's okay with your mother, I have some practice lightsabers on my ship. They don't cut, but they sting when you get hit. Would you like to try them out in a sparring match?"

I saw my son's eyes go wide with excitement. "Wow, can I?"

Dad patted Marcus on the knee. "If it's okay with your mother."

Marcus jumped off the couch and ran outside where his mother and Queen waited. I could hear the boys excited voice followed by a very clear and whining, "Please!"

"He's a chip off the old block," Dad said to me. "You used to try to wear me down with that begging." He stood and clapped a hand on my shoulder. "You need to spend time with your son without all the angst and emotions of the situation as a distraction. Get him excited about saber training and then later you two can talk."

It figures my dad would know how to break the ice.

"I guess we should get those practice lightsabers then," I said.

.

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**_Entry 179_ **

Marcus' introduction to the paternal side of his biological family had gone better than I expected. I was glad Dad had the forethought to bring the practice sabers. He was right about it making a great way to get to know my son. I was able to spar with Marcus and later talk to him more easily. My son thinks lightsabers are the coolest thing in the world…and he's right. I remember when I was his age how thrilled I was to use the lightsaber. It wasn't until later when I was dismembering people with the weapon that the coolness factor subsided considerably.

My mother thinks Marcus is too thin and asked the palace chef if she could use the kitchen. She was introduced as a visiting culinary artist from the famous Manarai Restaurant. The royal chefs were actually honored to work with her. Ema later told me that there was a remarkable improvement in the food since her arrival.

My brother and Marcus got along well. I guess it is not as awkward accepting an uncle as it is a newfound father. Jaden could also impress the boy with disgusting medical stories, like ' _Guess what the weirdest thing I have ever found in a person's stomach'_. The answer to that question is a glowstone found in the stomach of a Sullustan suffering from the eating disorder pica. At least Jaden didn't get into some of the more non-child-friendly topics he used to gross me out with…like Hutt sexual disorders.

Unfortunately, this was a terribly uncomfortable situation for Zylie. When I introduced her to my son I could see him visibly tense. He was polite but I could tell he saw her as the person that was keeping his parents from being together. That's not true though. Even if I never met Zylie, I don't think I could go back to Ema. She hurt me too much. When I look at her I don't see the woman I once loved, but the deceiver that hid my son from me for years. I know that's not fair, she didn't have much choice in the matter, but it's true nonetheless.

When it was finally time to leave my father asked to stay. "Talon, you being around Marcus would cause questions since you look so much like him. I look nothing like him. I think I can stay and train him without causing much suspicion."

"It's not up to me," I told my dad.

He gave me an earnest look. "Actually it is. Ema and the Queen said they have no objections and even the Seers have given their approval. Their only concern was with you. They weren't sure if it would cause...bad blood between us if you were asked to leave and I was cleared to stay."

To be honest, if dad stayed I would be horribly jealous. But dad lost nine years with his grandson…and family is everything to the man…so I don't blame him for not wanting to leave. Since he left the Jedi Order he probably misses teaching. He and mom had been traveling a lot, but that has to get old after a while.

"I'm okay with it dad. Is mom staying?"

He nodded his head. "Yes, we're going to make arrangements for somebody to take care of the restaurant in our absence."

I couldn't help but feel a little depressed and for the first time I wished I looked more like Jaden. He had my mother's dark hair and bronzed skin and looked nothing like Marcus. If I looked like Jaden I bet I could stay.

_Life wasn't fair._

I was jarred out of my reverie by my father reaching out and squeezing my shoulder. "Are you sure this is fine with you?"

I gave my dad a reassuring grin. "Sure. You gave me a wonderful childhood. I have the best parents any person could wish for…I know you'll be even better as grandparents."

My dad looked choked up by my comments as he pulled me into a hug. "Thanks, Son."

Jaden, Zylie and I went back to Coruscant without my parents. Nobody talked much on the journey back. I think everybody knew how sad I was.

.

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**_Entry 180_ **

My parents spent three months on Indupar. My father came back ecstatic. "Marcus is an amazing boy," he told me upon his return. "He's strong with the Force, polite, and kind. He has your strength and looks and he is really smart like your brother. He picks up things quickly."

I remember frowning at that backhanded compliment. Marcus has my brother's intelligence? Does dad think I'm stupid? I was going to call him on that comment, but he looked so happy that I didn't want to spoil his mood. Mom was beaming also.

"We are going back in a few months," my dad said. "Maybe we can get you to see your son for a few days."

I smiled. "I'd like that."

I am still a little bummed out that I can't spend months at a time with my son, but with my dad with him I feel like I am gaining some fatherly satisfaction vicariously. My dad is a great father. If I can't be with Marcus, my dad is the next best thing.

.

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**_Entry 181_ **

Jysella had her baby. My brother is now the proud father of a little girl named Jessa. My dad calls her his little princess (ironic since his grandson is a real Prince). Because of this addition to the family Dad and mom have been splitting their time between Coruscant and Indupar.

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**_Entry 182_ **

My dad is still training Marcus. The local HoloNet has reported that my father—a retired Jedi Master—has been training the ten-year-old Prince once it was discovered he had Force abilities. There hasn't been a word said about Marcus' paternity. I think everybody knows that non-Force users can have Force strong children. Because my father's presence hasn't been questioned I requested time with my son under the pretense of visiting my parents. I guess the Seers didn't see any problem with that because I was given permission to come to Indupar for a few days. Zylie is getting ready for exams, so I went alone.

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**_Entry 183_ **

Once I arrived at the Indupar Royal Palace I was brought to the sparring room where my dad was conducting lightsaber training with Marcus. It was an impressively huge room with padded floors and ceilings three stories high interspersed with transparisteel windows that allowed people to view the practice. High up on the back wall of the room I saw a large transparisteel display case. Inside were a number of deadly weapons that I recognized as some of my father's war trophies acquired during various missions. The weapons on exhibit included a Gamorrean Battle Axe taken during a raid on a sentient slave trade operation, a curvablade appropriated from a Spice Lord my dad captured, a Trandoshan double-blade from a bounty hunter he defeated and, of course, Lumiya's lightwhip. He has dozens of such weapons at home. It looks like he brought some of his favorites to show Marcus.

My son is too young to use real weapons but my father had a large assortment of practice armaments (shock only, not cutting) to include the practice lightsabers they were using, vibroblades, blasters, a shockwhip, an energy bola, and a Force pike. The exercise weapons were stored around the room on high shelves. Dad always believed every Jedi should be proficient in a multitude of weapons just in case their lightsaber was damaged or it simply was not the right weapon for the job.

I was also told that my father and Marcus were learning the unarmed combat art form called Teräs Käsi from a Galactic Fighting Champion brought in from Corellia. Personally I think it is all a little too much for a child, especially since he's not destined to be a Jedi Knight. He will be the ruler of the Indupar Crown Worlds, not traipsing around the galaxy fighting conflicts. I hope dad didn't have some Force premonition that Marcus needed to be a weapons master and steely-eyed assassin in the future. I doubt it, though. My guess is Ema and the Queen were smothering Marcus with their overprotectiveness and now he's relishing in the ability to do rough and tumble boy stuff…albeit the boy would have to be a Jedi or a Mandalorian assassin in training. Most kids don't train to kill.

I quietly entered the room and sat down on a small bench to watch them spar. Marcus is good with a lightsaber. He is holding up against my father fairly well. My father looked up and gave me a wink before he apparently decided to show me how Marcus can handle surprises.

As they were sparring, my dad reached out with an arm and a shockwhip (nonlethal version of a lightwhip) sailed off a shelf and into his hand. He activated the practice whip and swung it at Marcus. My son acted quickly, ducking and rolling away. As he recovered from his evasive maneuver a lightsaber shoto flew across the room and into his free hand. Now both opponents had two weapons. Marcus was using the short-bladed shoto to deflect the lightwhip while he parried and attacked with his main lightsaber. He must have come to the conclusion that he wasn't skilled enough to deflect the stinging whip forever. He looked over to another shelf and called to his hand a practice blaster (they shoot bolts similar to the ones fired by the practice remotes). He dropped the shoto right before the weapon smacked into the palm of his hand. He then began firing low intensity shockbolts at my father while still attacking him with the lightsaber. My dad was never good at deflecting shots with a lightwhip. Before he could change weapons one of Marcus' shockbolts hit my dad in the shin. That prompted a yelp from him and I could see Marcus disengage and back away nervously. He actually looking shocked that he got past my father's defenses. My dad called a ceasefire and Marcus deactivated his lightsaber looking both upset and proud at the same time.

"Sorry."

My dad grinned as he looked at his leg. "Don't worry. It's my prosthesis you hit and don't be sorry. That was good thinking."

Marcus beamed proudly and said, "Even _with_ the Force a blaster can sometimes beat a lightwhip."

The smile dropped from my face. That sounded so much like what my father said about his fight with Lumiya on Myrkr. ' _Without the Force a blaster beats a lightwhip every time.'_ I was a little shaken because we promised never to tell anybody it was my father that killed Lumiya. We spread the word across the galaxy that Jacen had killed the Sith. Did my father tell Marcus what happened during Jacen's run in with the darkside?

I looked over to my father and I can see by his face and sense through the Force that he was just as surprised. His eyes drifted over to the transparisteel cabinet that held Lumiya's whip. I let out a soft groan realizing what must have happened. If Dad let Marcus handle the real weapon…who knows what information he could have picked up using his psychometric post-cognitive abilities. Damn, we have to be careful not to let Marcus handle items that hold a secret. I can now control my psychometric abilities, but Marcus still has trouble turning it off.

My dad quickly recovered and smiled at Marcus. "You did a great job." He deactivated his lightsaber and clipped it back on his belt before giving my son a formal bow. "Your Excellency your skills with a lightsaber and a blaster will soon rival my own."

The formality of his interaction let me know this was not a secure place to talk. I looked up and saw people in the upper observation windows watching the sparring match. My son noticed me and smiled. "Jedi Tantiss, what an honor to see you again. Can I assume you wish time to visit your family?"

I stood. "Your assumption would be correct your Excellency. If it's not a bother."

He grinned. "No, not at all. Please join me in my quarters I would love a chance to talk to you both."

I followed my son and father from the training room to the Prince's private chambers. Once at the door my father begged off saying he forgot something and he would return soon. I knew he was just giving us some time alone. Once the door closed behind us Marcus turned and gave me a hug. "It is good to see you, dad."

I hugged him back fiercely. "You look good in sparring practice." I stepped back to view my boy. "You're getting so tall."

I hate to say it, but reunions between my son and me are always a bit awkward. I am sure he feels like he is hugging a stranger. In contrast, Marcus looks very comfortable with my father. I hope when I can be around my son more often I will acquire that easygoing relationship.

"I heard Uncle Jaden has a daughter now."

"Yes, you have another cousin."

Marcus nodded with a grin. "That's great. Uncle Jaden will be an awesome dad." His smile slipped a little. "I heard you're getting married soon."

"Yeah," I said cautiously. I know this is a sore subject for him.

He simply nodded his head once again. "Cool."

My brow rose at his unruffled demeanor. "That doesn't bother you anymore?"

He sighed and then shook his head. "No. Mom explained things to me a little better. She said the Seers predicted you would marry another person…so Mom had to let you go."

I almost snickered. That was an overly simplistic and pleasant way to describe what happened. I guess it is better than saying she unceremoniously dumped me or that I was furious with her for hiding the pregnancy. But, in her defense, Marcus already knew she lied to both of us and she did tell me all those years ago that the Seers said I would find love with another.

"So you're not upset about me and your mother not getting back together?"

He shrugged. "The Seers know all. We can't fight fate."

I didn't like the sound of that. "The future is always in motion, Marcus. Don't let the Seers make you think your course in life is set and predetermined."

"They don't, but they are right so often that…," he trailed off as he walked over to a small cooling unit and pulled out a bottle of water. He held it up. "You want one?"

"No thanks."

Marcus opened the bottle and took a long sip. He then walked over to his couch and sat down looking exhausted. My dad must have put him through a tough regimen.

"The Seers gave me a class on the subject," Marcus continued. "They agree that the future is always in motion. When they meditate they see something they call the time-stream. It is all futures flowing together running from the present to the future, but there are many eddies and currents running within the time-stream." Marcus made wavy motions with his free hand to illustrate the various streams. "They said they can see all potential futures. They told me that a long time ago, way before I was born, when the Chancellor Palpatine ordered the Jedi purge and declared himself Emperor the time-stream churned like rapids on a river. Some futures veered off making small independent streams, but the majority of the futures were interwoven and all the Seers could see up ahead was the waterfall." His one hand went forward before it plunged downward signifying the galaxy's fall into darkness. He fell silent for a moment before he continued. "They said they never forgave themselves for not intervening."

I shook my head. "There was nothing they could have done."

"They believe they could have altered things." Marcus gave me a level gaze. "Mom believes it also. She's scared of the Seers. I can feel it in the Force."

I always disliked the Seers meddling in my life, but I never saw them as menacing. I would have to talk to Ema about this. "Well, I don't think the Seers are all knowing and you shouldn't either…you confounded them once. I was told on your ninth birthday you did something that made it impossible for them to see the time-stream. So don't follow them blindly, they _are_ fallible. And always remember, _you_ are the ruler of Indupar, not them." I gave my son a stern look. "Promise me that you will remember my words."

He nodded his head. "I will, Dad. I promise."

That was enough serious talk. We had a lot of catching up to do, and that's what we did. I told him about my recent missions and he excitedly told me about his training and how my mother bakes for him the best cookies ever. Dad stopped by about two hours later. Together we had fun telling Marcus stories about the Tantiss family and all our adventures.

It was a good day.


	38. Chapter 38

**_Entry 184_ **

I talked to Ema the next day about what Marcus said about the Seers. "Are you really frightened of them?" I had asked her. We were sitting in the Queen's office—a location with large transparisteel windows that allowed us to talk privately, but still remain visible. I didn't want to be seen in Ema's quarters or her in mine. I didn't need rumors floating around right before my wedding about me being alone with my ex-lover. I don't know if anybody in the palace knew about my previous relationship with Ema, but I wasn't going to take any chances.

She gave a slight shrug from where she sat. "I fear them, but not because I think they're evil. It's because they see time differently from us."

My face scrunched up in confusion. "What does that have to do with anything?"

She sat forward and spoke softly, almost like she was afraid to be overheard. "Talon, if you could see a century or a millennia into the future, and you _truly_ cared about the galaxy as a whole, you wouldn't have the same concerns as other sentients."

I still wasn't getting it. "How so?"

"Humans and other sentients are usually concerned about things happening within their lifespan or the lifetime of the next generation. Most of us don't care what is going to happen three hundred years from now because we'll be long dead. The Seers aren't just prognosticating about things that will take place during their expected lifespan; they are viewing the futures for the galaxy as a whole. I am not sure how far into the future they can see…it might be tens-of-thousands of years for all I know." She chewed on her bottom lip for a moment. "I don't think they're evil, but I think they can become somewhat detached to the needs of short-lived species like us. They are seeing the bigger picture. I think they want what is the very best for the galaxy and the future…and that may not be what is best for us personally."

"Oh," I said softly. I thought I understood what she was getting at. It reminded me a little about some of Jaden's medical patients. They would come in with Quillworms or other parasites from exotic worlds. He would treat them with medicine that kills the worms and the person would recover. It is great for the patient, bad for the Quillworms. In this case the patient is the galaxy's future and we are possibly the Quillworms. "So, you are saying the Seers are dispassionate when it comes to us. They are looking out for the galaxy and if eliminating somebody improves the future…they will eliminate that person or persons?"

She thought about it for a second before letting out a slow and controlled breath. "I don't know about murder, but you and I both know from experience that they are more than willing to manipulate people to get what they want."

"Like Marcus?"

"Yes."

"You think they wanted a Force-strong King?" When she nodded I asked. "Do you think your sister's husband, the King, was murdered?"

She closed her eyes and shook her head. "I don't know. I don't want to believe so. The doctors said Odaj died from a genetic heart defect that remained undetected until after his death. With a warning it's possible that the Seers could have saved him and the baby that Kaie carried, but that child might have died from the same defect. Maybe they were simply trying to install a sitting King that had a better chance of a long life and therefore bringing stability to the kingdom." She looked out the transparisteel window to the corridor outside. "The Seers want to stay here. That much I know. My sister had an argument with the head Seer last year and threatened to kick them out of the royal court. I remember his hair bristled with fear. He apologized and backed off. They possibly like the protection we afford them or perhaps the political connections or the fact that Indupar is not in Imperial or Galactic Alliance space—no matter what reason, they want to remain here."

I thought about it for a long while. I had no proof that the Seers were doing anything evil or threatened the life of my son. There really wasn't much we could do about them until we found out more about their motives.

I was going to be damn sure to talk to my father about this though. Since he will be on Indupar, he might as well watch the Seers.

.

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**_~44.5 ABY~_ **

**_Entry 185_ **

Zylie and I have traveled to Indupar three times for short visits to see Marcus. My son seems to be warming up to Zylie. Of course Marcus might like her because she tells him funny stories about me—like the time she sic'd her vornskr on me.

"You should have seen your dad's eyes go wide with panic when _Princess_ rammed her snout into his groin." They both started laughing hysterically. I wish she would tell him some more heroic stories about me. I was in combat dozens of times, after all. Of course she wasn't there to witness my bravery…she's probably leaving those war stories for me to tell.

I was happy when she started talking about how our two fathers fought side-by-side on Byss to take out the Emperor Reborn. That impressed my boy. I'm surprised my father never told him that story. Of course, my father wasn't particularly proud about the accidental destruction of the planet by the _Galaxy Gun_. I think that's an emotional wound my father still carries.

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**_~45 ABY~_ **

**_Entry 186_ **

Zylie finally finished with her university studies. She is now a computer/Information Technology expert. I am sure she will put her knowledge to good use…like slicing.

I went with her family to the graduation ceremony. Valla accompanied her parents so Ben made sure he was there with her. They had been separated for a few weeks and I know those two couldn't wait for the ceremony and reception to be over with so they could sneak off together.

After everybody got his or her diplomas we went to the reception. I was standing next to Zylie when her classmate Steben (the fanboy) came running up to her and put his hands on her shoulders as he grinned at her excitedly. "You'll never believe what happened!"

At this point he saw me and quickly broke contact with my fiancé. "Hey Talon," he said before he continued his story in a rapid and animated manner. "You remember how you said I should apply for a job with Galactic Alliance Intelligence, more exactly the cryptology department?" He didn't wait for her to respond but forged on. "And I said there was no way in hell I would get an interview, but you nagged me to put in an application anyway…well you will never believe what happened."

I had to suppress a laugh when he said Zylie _'nagged'_ him. Ha! "Did you get an interview?" I asked already knowing the answer. I didn't need the Force to figure that out. He wouldn't be this excited if he was denied an interview.

He looked up to me grinning ear-to-ear. "Yeah, but not only that, guess who is conducting the interview?"

I was about to guess Zakarisz Ghent because he is not only the Chief of the Cryptology department, but he's an old friend of Talon Karrde. I opened my mouth to say just that but Zylie shot me a warning look.

She smiled at her friend and said, "I have no idea, who's giving you an interview?"

"Zakarisz Ghent the chief of the department!"

She did her best to look surprised as she gave a happy squeal and hugged her friend. "I'm so happy for you." I gave her a knowing look. It is obvious that she had her dad pull some strings.

Steben smiled as he pulled away. "I have to tell the rest of the guys from the study group. See ya." He then ran off.

I looked over to Zylie. "Let me guess. You never told him that Ghent used to work for your dad and that you know the man personally."

She shrugged. "I didn't want him to think he got the interview just because of connections. He's one of the best. Most of my study group passed their tests because he was there to tutor and encourage the students that were lagging behind. He really is a programming genius. Ghent would be lucky to have him."

I pulled her into a hug. "That was nice of you."

She smiled at me. "Thanks." We walked over to where her parents were talking to one of the department heads. Zylie looked around the large reception hall. "Where are Valla and Ben?"

I gave a cough trying to cover a chuckle. "Where do you think? They're probably littering my couch with undergarments. Remember, they haven't seen each other for three weeks."

She gave a faint smile. "We're now going to face that problem, aren't we, now that we both have graduated? Long separations."

I pulled her closer to me. "Maybe you can get a job on Coruscant."

She sighed. "Dad is sort of set on us going into the family business."

I remembered my earlier conversation with Ben about taking a break from the Jedi. I was willing to make the sacrifice if it came to that.

"Don't worry," I told her. "I'm sure everything will turn out fine."

.

.

**_Entry 187_ **

It is wedding planning time. Force save me! It was decided that Zylie and I would have a big double wedding with Valla and Ben…and so Ben and I are now in **_Wedding Planner Hell_**! The ladies are continuously peppering us with questions. _'What flavor cake should we have? Do you think the groomsmen should wear cummerbunds? What type of sparkling wine should we serve? Where do you want the reception at?'_ To which Ben and I would reply, "Whatever you want, Dear."

We don't care! Men don't sit around in their youth fantasizing about their dream wedding…but females obviously do. Valla and Zylie were so excited about everything. I'm excited…for the Honeymoon portion of the wedding. Ha.

 

**.**

**.**

**_~45 ABY~_ **

**_Entry 188_ **

Ema contacted me and said Marcus asked if he could attend my wedding. I said ' _Yes, of course!'_ I was really shocked by his request. I thought he was still unhappy that I wasn't getting back with his mother, but perhaps I was wrong. I guess Zylie won him over…or maybe he simply wants to see the entire Tantiss/Skywalker/Solo family while incognito. Ema said if he does attend that I shouldn't bring attention to him when I see him. I should treat him like any visiting dignitary. He has another year before he is crowned, so they still have to keep his paternity a strict secret.

I need to get my father to teach Marcus to shield his Force presence. Force signatures of family members sometimes have a similar feel to them. It is not one hundred percent accurate, but with a wedding party full of Jedi I don't want to take any risks. Luckily my parents will be on Indupar for a few more days before returning to Coruscant.

.

.

**_Entry 189_ **

Today was my wedding day!

Zylie and I are currently being chauffeured via airspeeder to our Honeymoon destination, a luxury resort on the Western Sea. Zylie has fallen asleep…hopefully she will wake up for our wedding night. Ha! I really can't blame her. Her and Valla were really stressed the entire week prior to the wedding. Those two wanted everything perfect, so they were double and triple checking everything. She didn't get much sleep so she's exhausted and probably a little tipsy from one too many sparkling wines during the reception. Since neither of us has to drive I have a few minutes to write in my journal.

The wedding turned out great. The ladies did a great job in planning our nuptials. Zylie and Valla wore similar wedding dresses while Ben and I were in our full Jedi robes. The Grand Master himself performed the ceremony. I got a little nervous during the vows but I didn't pass out like I feared I would. My mother cried at the wedding (she cries at all happy occasions). I am also fairly sure Zylie's mom and Mara Jade Skywalker were both a little teary eyed.

After the wedding and holoimages were done we all retired to the grand reception hall of Coruscant's Imperial Palace for a big meal and then dancing.

I could see my father walking around in a double-breasted suit with red cummerbund and grinning ear-to-ear as he talked to the guests and Jedi. I think he misses his old Jedi friends. He never returned to the Jedi Order after the fiasco with Jacen. I still don't know what he and Commander Deke Tavik did when they left Coruscant and personally I don't want to know…I say let sleeping neks lie.

After all, everything turned out perfectly for our family. Jacen is happily married to Tenel Ka. He now has two daughters, Allana and Teela, and the family is joyfully blissful. At least that is what I assume. Every time I see Jacen he has a big smile on his face. I don't think I have ever seen him this carefree and happy.

Jaina married her Imperial boyfriend Jagged Fel who ended up as Emperor of the Imperial Remnant (I bet that drives my Uncle Han crazy). So now my cousin is Empress Jaina Solo Fel. They have a son (Jag Junior) and she is pregnant with their second child.

Anakin and Tahiri are still happily married and have three children now. I am not sure if they are done having kids. I wouldn't be surprised if they have more.

My brother and Jysella are Jedi Healers at the Temple and they are wonderful parents to their daughter Jessa.

The Skywalker twins and sister Hanna were finally knighted. Hanna is currently dating a Jedi Knight from the Temple. The twins…I don't believe it…but the twins are dating identical twin girls from the local university. They met at some _'Identical Twin'_ conference. I don't know how serious it is, but it just serves to confuse the hell out of me. At least if they dated different looking girls I would have a chance at figuring out if I am talking to Jak or Owen.

All of the above mentioned were at the wedding in addition to other Jedi, college friends and some of my jump trooper buddies. It was a wonderful evening.

Near the end of the meal the sound of metal striking a glass echoed through the hall and I spotted Jaden clanking a knife against a wine glass. "Can I have everybody's attention?"

The banquet hall fell quiet as all turned to my brother who was Best Man to both Ben and me. Jaden held up his glass. "I want to thank everybody for attending this grand occasion. I would like to congratulate the parents of the brides, Talon and Zara Karrde and the parents of the grooms, Luke and Mara Jade Skywalker and my parents Mark and Kira Tantiss. I also want to welcome our regal honored guests, Emperor and Empress Fel and Queen Mother Tenel Ka Djo and Royal Consort Jacen Solo."

He turned toward us. "I remember the last time Valla, Zylie, Ben, Talon and I were together at a wedding. It was thirteen years ago at Anakin and Tahiri's nuptials. We caught an underage Valla and Zylie trying to sneak two glasses of champagne away from the open bar. Of course Talon and Ben stopped them and confiscated their drinks. That resulted in an angry outburst from the girls informing Ben and Talon what incredible jerks they were." Jaden paused while a few people laughed. "I will always remember their response to the girls' anger. Talon said, _'Gods, I feel sorry for anybody who dates those girls.'_ To which Ben responded, _'I know'."_

Everybody in the banquet hall laughed. I know my face turned red as I looked over to Zylie who was trying her best to look mad, but failed.

Jaden gave me a tooth-filled grin before continuing.

"Back then I never thought the next wedding those four would end up at would be their own." He turned to us and raised his glass. "Here's to a lifetime of happiness and love for the two couples. To family!"

The guests all raised their glasses. "To family!"

A broad smile crossed my face as I looked at my bride and all in attendance. It was nice having all of my family together. Well, almost all my family. So far I haven't seen my son.

I was about to drink my sparkling wine when my eyes fell upon a young boy with blond hair with blue eyes standing at the back of the banquet room.

My son made it to the reception!

He gave me a big grin and a slight wave of his hand. He was standing next to Kaie's royal consort, Captain Dentti. I was overjoyed that he was able to attend. I wanted to run over and give him a hug, but that is the last thing he would want. I was told not to call attention to him.

"To family," I said as I lifted my glass up to my son and his pseudo-stepfather. Both gave me a slight nod. I drank down the contents and smiled.

My entire family was now together.

Opps...got to go. The chauffer has pulled into the resort parking lot. I need to wake Zylie up. She doesn't want to sleep through our Honeymoon. Ha! I have a lot more to write about, but that will have to wait until later.


	39. Chapter 39

**_Entry 190_ **

I woke up a little early this morning to order breakfast from room service. Zylie is still asleep. I kept her up most of the night, but she didn't seem to mind.

I had a very nice and romantic wedding night with my wife. _My wife!_ I still can't believe it. _I'm married!_ For the longest time I thought I was doomed to go from relationship to relationship like Valin Horn. Not that Valin is miserable. I don't think he wants to settle down. It just wasn't the life I desired. I wanted to be with somebody I could start a family with. I wanted a happy marriage like my parents have. I'm thrilled that I found the perfect mate.

Anyway, I need to record what happened at the reception after I saw my son.

I wasn't supposed to make a scene, so I finished my meal and then Zylie and I did our first dance. While swaying to the music I told her I saw Marcus and I wanted to go say hello. We decided I should go alone because if we both disappeared the guests would think we started our Honeymoon early. Therefore, while Zylie was dancing with her father I went out the door where I last saw my son standing, but I couldn't find him.

"Are you looking for Marcus?" I heard my dad's voice from behind me.

I turned and grinned at my father and mother who followed me out of the reception area. "Yeah, did you see where he went?"

"He's going to meet us at the large capacity hangar bay," my mother said with a wide smile.

I could feel a huge amount of anticipation radiating off of my parents, which didn't seem odd at the time because they're always thrilled to see their grandson.

We took a lift up to the higher level of the palace and then a short tram ride to the hanger. I followed my parents as we approached a large Wayfarer-Class Medium Transport. I was somewhat familiar with this type of ship because it is very unique. It was built by Kuat Systems Engineering and is one of the few freighters that included a hanger bay module that could hold small shuttles. It was used extensively by smugglers since the entire cargo pod could be jettisoned to avoid customs and because it had a hanger module the Rebel Alliance often used this type of ship as an assault shuttle. I believe the Kuat Shipyards stopped making this particular transport model twenty years ago, so this pristine looking ship must be a completely renovated model.

We walked up the boarding ramp where I was met by Captain Dentti and my son Marcus. Marcus gave me a big hug and I was astonished at how big he's gotten. He's eleven-years-old and was easily over 1.7 meters already.

"Nice seeing you dad," he said before he broke away and about crushed my mother in a big hug. "Grandma, I missed you." He then turned to my father and hugged him. "You too, grandpa."

I gave a sad smile. I am glad my parents have a great relationship with my son…I just wish I could spend as much time with him as they do.

Captain Dentti came up to me and shook my hand. "Congratulations! I'm happy for you. Ema and Kaie decided that Marcus and I should come alone." He gave a slight shrug. "I guess Ema thought she would make things uncomfortable for you and if Kaie showed up the media would follow her every movement." He motioned his head toward Marcus. "We were able to sneak out unnoticed."

A wide grin crossed my face. "I am so happy you two made it." I looked around the large ship. "This is a nice transport."

Captain Dentti gave me an amused chuckle. "You like it? Allow us to show you around." He turned to my son. "Marcus, why don't you show your dad the ship?"

My son gave me a mischievous smile that made me wonder if there was a private joke I was missing. Marcus grabbed my hand and pulled me down the corridor. "Come on dad."

He showed me the ship's bridge, two large staterooms, offices, conference area, 'fresher, galley and sickbay. The ship came with two droids to assist in the day-to-day operation of the vessel. There was a hybrid pilot/protocol droid that could act as pilot, navigator or interpreter. There was also a medical droid inside the sickbay.

We then walked through a hatch to the cargo area. I was impressed by the capacity of the ship. It could easily hold two hundred metric tons. It was an extraordinarily large ship to use to simply transport two people, but perhaps nobody would expect the Prince of Indupar to be traveling in a freighter.

From the cargo area we went through another hatch to the hanger bay. There I stopped in confusion. Inside were two StealthX fighters. I turned to Captain Dentti. "I didn't know the Indupar government used StealthX's."

The Captain's grin grew wider. "We don't. This isn't my ship."

I looked to him and then my parents whose glee was permeating through the Force. "Then who does this ship belong to?"

My dad gave me a sly grin. "You…well you and Ben and your wives."

"It's a wedding gift," my mother explained.

My legs started to feel weak and I leaned against the bulkhead. "For us?" I looked around the huge ship confused. "Dad, I know the restaurant business is good, but how could you afford this?"

"I sold the restaurant."

"What?" I looked to mom in shock. The restaurant was her life. "You shouldn't have done that."

My mom came up to me and gave me a hug. "Don't worry about it Talon. We made a great profit…"

"An obscene profit," my dad added.

My mother chuckled. "He's right. The profit was obscene."

"And we didn't spend it all on this ship," Dad explained. "The Karrdes and Skywalkers put in equal amounts into buying this freighter."

"We took the extra money and put it in a trust fund for your brother and his family and we kept some credits to travel," my mother said. "Besides, I have been traveling back and forth across the galaxy to see my two grandchildren. I didn't have much time for the restaurant anymore."

I still didn't understand why they would purchase such an hugely expensive gift. I guess my father saw my confusion and explained. "Son, we want you and Ben and your wives to have a good, happy marriages. Your wives are traders and traders are on the move all the time. You are Jedi that are frequently deployed. You four would probably be separated all the time and that's not good for a relationship. We thought if you could have a ship that could hold your StealthX's then you could be roving Jedi. You may be separated from your wives some times, but this would help keep you together a bit more."

I was so overwhelmed that tears rolled down my face. "Mom, Dad…" I grabbed my mother up in a big hug and then did the same with my father. "Thank you!" I then turned to my son. "You were in on this surprise." I shook my head. "I didn't suspect a thing."

"Now you are going to have to act surprised when we show this to Ben, Valla and Zylie," my dad warned me. "We just thought since you needed a private place to see your son, this would be an ideal setting."

My voice was faltering I was so overcome by emotion. "I have the best family in the galaxy." I went and gave Marcus a hug. "Next year, you'll be crowned and I will make up all that time we have been separated."

He gave me a soft smile. "I know you will dad. I can't wait." He turned to my parents. "This is a great family to be part of."

I smiled. "Yes it is."

I stayed with Marcus as long as I could without being terribly missed by the wedding party. I then went back to the reception and found my lovely bride and gave her a long lingering kiss until my brother yelled out, "Get a room."

I chuckled and thanked the Force for everything it has given me over the years. I had a wonderful childhood, great friends and family, a son and now a wonderful woman as my wife.

The rest of the night was wonderful. Ben, Valla and Zylie were amazed by our parents' generous gift. I'm glad Ben's been my roommate for the last few years and I know we get along…because it looks like we are going to be spending a lot of time together with our two brides. This is going to be an adventure. Zylie and Valla grew up on a ship. Living on a freighter will be new to Ben and me, but I think having two beautiful women on the ship will make long flights tolerable. Ha!

Somebody is at the door; I think breakfast is here. So I guess I should close this journal with a few words.

My time as a single man has come to an end and as I start my new life as a married man all I have to say is ' _life is good. I cannot wait to see what the future brings'._

 


End file.
